Chapter 39: Collared: Chapter 38

bigail inclined herself on the balls of her feet and pressed her ear against Preston’s door. It wasn’t the first time she found herself committing such an act. However, today was the first time she’d done so with her heart exposed for him to claim and engrave his name.

She didn’t care she’d get in trouble for twisting the knob. She didn’t care she’d be kicked out of the room for lying next to him. All she knew was Lauren had given her a command to love and be loved by Preston and it was her mission to complete such a task.

Lauren’s revelation had shown her how deeply she cared for Preston. It was love’s testimony to let a loved one go to love another, and she’d done so with grace and without regret, putting her trust in Abigail to love Preston as he deserved to be loved.

Unfortunately, sometimes women forgot about other women. Abigail swore never to forget about Lauren and the sacrifice she’d made. So much had already been taken from her and the one person she’d always wanted, she gave away selflessly.

Her stomach made a repulsive growl as she recalled her story.

Today’s world was a cruel world. Heinous crimes were committed on a daily basis and rarely ever did victims get justice. Yet another reason why not to bring an innocent life into this disgusting place.

As Abigail’s eyes adjusted to the moonlight, she noticed the Greek God that laid on the bed. Silk sheets were wrapped around his hips. His chest was naked, begging for her hands to smooth the ridges on his abs.

Not wasting another unnecessary minute, she got under the sheets with Preston. Her eyes closed as she blew out a comforting sigh. This was where she belonged. This was where she needed to be .

She wrapped her arms around him and nuzzled his neck with her nose. It was surprisingly warm, and smooth, yet strong. All him.

“Abigail,” he said with deep relief. His voice was smeared with sleep—groggy and drowsy. Extremely sexy.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“If you’re here to say goodbye, don’t.”

“I’m not going anywhere. Did you think I was leaving?”

His silence said it all. Why did he always think she was going to say goodbye? Did he think himself that unworthy of love?

She scratched his five o’clock shadow with her thumb. The stubble sent goosebumps down her arms. “I’m not leaving you.” She’d say the sentence however many times he needed to hear it.

“No?”

“No.”

“Why are you here, then?”

“Lauren left us.” She sniffled a tear. “I didn’t want to be alone.”

“I know.”

“You knew she was leaving us?”

“I didn’t know when, but I knew she’d leave soon.”

“Why didn’t you stop her?”

“I’d never pressure a woman to do something she doesn’t want to do, especially Lauren. I’d known for a while she’d been wanting to leave, but I knew it had to happen on her own terms. I’d never push her away, not intentionally, at least.”

“Would you tell me about her?”

“I’d much rather talk about us.”

Abigail shook her head. Although she knew they had to talk about the use of her safeword, she wasn’t ready for the conversation. She would much rather talk about Lauren.

He sighed. “It isn’t my place.”

“She told me what happened to her.”

Preston sat up. His hand flew to the bedside lamp. He rubbed the sleep out of his coffee eyes as he spoke, “She told you?”

“Not in so many words, but I got the gist. It was what she neglected to tell me that said everything. She says you’re her angel, isn’t that what you call me?”

His smile was somber. “When she found out of my sexual habits, she said I was dark. Still an angel, however, now I was tainted by human desires. I’ve never considered myself a spiritual being, everything she said sounded like gibberish to me. But then I met you and I understood what she meant when she’d called me her angel.

”

Abigail’s eyes welled with tears as she realized the vital role each had played in their lives.

Preston was Lauren’s angel, protecting her throughout the various stages of her life. Lauren was Abigail’s angel, guiding her in the path she needed to go. And Abigail was Preston’s angel, providing acceptance and ministering to his needs. It was a wheel that kept on turning, and though Lauren moved on to deliver guidance in another’s life, they both knew the moment they needed her she’d be there just as they’d be there for her.

“…but I figured it out.” Abigail caught Preston midway through his side of the story. “When she was ready to speak to me about it, I knew I’d gained her trust. I was very happy for her because trusting another man was a sign that she was moving forward. I made sure never to jeopardize her trust. What she went through… Fuck. No one should ever have to go through that. Sometimes she’d blamed herself, wondering if the clothes she wore were too provocative and a bunch of shit that boiled my blood. Women should be able to dress however they please without men acting like starved dogs.”

Abigail sat up. “Preston Trice, sadistic-dominant, a feminist? Who would’ve thought?”

He gave her a sly grin. “There are many things you don’t know about me, Angel.”

She suddenly had a desire to know everything there was to know about him.

“Like what?”

“For one, I believe the US moon landing was a hoax, and Area 51 has extraterrestrial activity, that’s why we aren’t allowed there.”

She laughed a throaty laugh that made Preston join in. “Pretty much conspiracy theories. You believe our government has been toying with us?”

“Not all are theories. There’s one I haven’t mentioned and it’s not a theory because I saw it happen with my own eyes.”

“Oh, really? What?”

Silence drew their bodies closer as Abigail sought to hear his words. In his dark eyes, she saw the purest kind of love as they searched hers. She tried to mentally prepare herself for what he was going to say but couldn’t, his words a train that couldn’t be stopped.

They spoke at the same time.

“I rather not—”

“I’m in love with you, Abigail.”

“Preston…” It was all she said, not finding it in herself to say the words back .

She’d once told herself if she ever found a man who gave in to her desires and made her feel normal, she’d give him everything. So why was it so hard to give Preston her heart?

“I know you’re not ready for it and I know you don’t feel the same way right now. I hope you will one day. Hopefully soon.” She shook her head, but he kept talking. “I want us to be more than what we are right now. Please, don’t allow my words to frighten you or push you away because I’d hate to lose you.”

Like a lightning bolt, she was struck speechless. But just because she couldn’t say the words back to him didn’t mean she didn’t feel them.

What she had with Preston had been out of reach for years so much so that she’d built a fortress around her heart. One tall enough no one could climb. One heavily guarded no one could get into. She accounted for every scenario not to be hurt by a man who’d call her mentally ill or who’d abuse her based on ignorance.

She never accounted for a six-foot-three Greek with the stamina of an Olympian to climb the walls of her protected heart. She thought his trident couldn’t shake her world and shatter her walls.

She’d been wrong.

And now she laid humble, naked, and vulnerable to not only his words but his love. It was a vulnerability she had never felt before. She was emotionally naked and as she reached for garments, none were big enough to shield her.

“You’re wrong. Just because I am not ready to say the words, it doesn’t mean I don’t feel the same. I feel just as you do. I…I am not ready to say the words because if I do…If I do and for whatever reason things don’t work out…”

“You’ll be left with a wound that can’t be healed,” he completed her sentence.

“Yes. I want you to know, I accept your love. And I won’t run from it or you. I’m here to stay for as long as you’ll have me.”

His lips turned into a smile that imprinted crows’ feet on either side of his eyes. He seemed content with her response and so she felt safe to offer a piece of her heart.

He grabbed her sore ass and lifted her body to lie on top of his. He kissed the top of her head as he drew circles on her back. His arms wrapped around her as if making sure she wouldn’t leave.

Abigail fell asleep to the warmth of his body and the small whistles erupting from his lips.