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A A R A V I
I felt disgusted when he said he loves me.
"Love happens unexpectedly, Nikshant ji, not when your wife was dying and that time you realized that you love your wife. Hypocrisy ki bhi hadd hoti hai, Nikshant ji," I said, my voice cold, unyielding.
( There is a limit to hypocrisy. )
He flinched, but his eyes held a different emotionâregret, desperation, longing. But I had seen enough of his emotions to know that they meant nothing to me anymore.
"You don't realize love when you are blinded with anger, but when your loved ones leave you, then you realize how important that person was to you. And I realized how important you are to me, Cherry," Nikshant ji said, his voice thick with something I refused to acknowledge.
I scoffed, shaking my head. "I don't have the patience to listen to your useless talk. And yeah, don't follow me," I said, turning on my heel, my heart hammering in my chest. I needed to get away from him before my resolve wavered.
"Hey, wait!" Nikshant ji's voice was urgent, and before I could step away, he came and stood in front of me, blocking my way. My eyes narrowed as I raised a brow, silently questioning his audacity.
Without a word, he pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket and extended it toward me. "Take it," he said.
I stared at the paper, hesitating. "What is this?"
"A letter," he said simply. "For you. Just read it once, please."
I clenched my fists. "I donât need anything from you."
His shoulders dropped slightly, but he remained persistent. "Just this, Cherry. Just read it once and then do whatever you want."
I took the paper from his hand, my fingers curling around it for a moment. He watched me with hopeful eyes, as if this single sheet could erase the pain he had inflicted upon me.
And then, without a second thought, I threw it near the dustbin.
A sharp intake of breath sounded from behind me, but I didn't care. I refused to acknowledge him, refused to let him see the storm brewing inside me. Without sparing him a glance, I turned and walked away.
The sound of my footsteps echoed in the hallway, but his didnât follow.
For a moment, the silence felt deafening.
Thenâwhen I was finally aloneâa sob escaped from my lips. My chest tightened as my vision blurred with unshed tears.
It hurts.
Damn it, it hurts so much.
I bit my lip, forcing myself to suppress the overwhelming emotions threatening to drown me. No, I wouldnât let him see this side of me. I wouldnât let him know that his presence still had the power to shatter me into pieces.
Taking a deep breath, I walked towards the kitchen, my sanctuary, the only place where I could silence my thoughts.
The moment I stepped in, I tied my hair back and set to work. The rhythmic chopping of vegetables, the simmering of spices, and the warmth of the stoveâthey were my escape, the only thing that could ground me when my emotions spiraled out of control.
One dish. Then another. Then another.
I lost track of time. Two hours must have passed, but I kept cooking. The kitchen was filled with the aroma of freshly made food, a stark contrast to the chaos inside my heart.
I heard footsteps behind me. I didnât need to turn to know who it was.
Nikshant ji.
He had come again, lingering near the door like a shadow that refused to fade.
He cleared his throat, trying to initiate a conversation.
I ignored him.
Because ignoring was easier.
Because ignoring didn't hurt as much as talking did.
I clutched the bowls in my hands, feeling their warmth seep into my fingers, but nothing could reach the coldness settling in my heart. Without looking at him, I walked toward the dining area, my steps steady, controlled. I had to be in control. If I let myself slip even a little, I knew the dam I had built around my emotions would shatter. And I couldn't afford thatânot now, not ever again.
I heard his footsteps behind me, hesitant yet persistent. He was following me, just like he had been since the moment he set foot in this house. A part of me wished he would stop. A part of me wished he would fight harder.
"Aaravi," he called my name again, and this time, there was something so fragile in his voice that it almost made me stop. Almost.
I placed the bowls on the dining table, adjusting them unnecessarily to keep my hands busy. Anything to avoid looking at him.
"I donât want to lose you," he said, softer now, as if afraid that if he spoke too loudly, I would disappear.
I finally turned to face him, gripping the edge of the table for support. His eyesâGod, those eyes. I hated how they still had the power to shake my resolve. There was honesty in them, a rawness that wasnât there before. But honesty meant nothing now. Not when it came too late.
"Maybe you already did," I said, my voice emotionless, detached. Because if I let even a sliver of emotion slip through, I would fall apart.
He inhaled sharply, his shoulders tensing. "Please, Cherry⦠let me fix everything," he pleaded, his voice thick with desperation.
I flinched at the name. Cherry. The name that once made my heart flutter now felt like a blade against my skin.
"Broken things can never be fixed, Nikshant ji," I said, my voice laced with vulnerability despite my best efforts.
Broken things.
Our marriage.
My love.
My trust in him.
"I will fix it," he vowed, his voice rough, edged with emotion. "Even if I have to break myself in the process."
I swallowed the lump in my throat and turned away. I didnât have the strength to respond to that. Didnât have the courage to acknowledge the way his words made something inside me tremble.
So I did the only thing I couldâI walked away, leaving him standing there, clutching onto something that had already slipped through his fingers.
A U T H O R
The silence was thick, save for the soft, muffled sobs escaping Aaraviâs trembling lips. Her frail body lay curled on Karanveerâs lap, her face buried against his thigh, soaking the fabric of his pants with her endless tears.
His fingers combed through her dark hair with the gentleness of a man who had seen his loved ones break too many times before. Karanveer had always been her shield, standing tall between her and the cruelties of the world. Yet now, he felt powerlessâwatching his little sister crumble like fragile glass.
Her voice, hoarse from crying, shattered the silence.
"Kyun Bhagwaan ji har cheez mujhse cheen lete hain, jaise hi woh mere liye keemti banne lagti hai? Jaise main shrapit hoon. Jis pal main kisi cheez se pyaar karti hoon, woh meri ungliyon se phisal jaati hai," she whispered, her words laced with unbearable agony.
( Why does God take away everything from me the moment it becomes precious to me? It's like I'm cursed. The moment I love something, it slips through my fingers.)
Each word stabbed at Karanveerâs heart like a dagger. He had seen her endure pain before, but nothing had prepared him for this. Nothing had prepared him to watch his once-strong sister break down again into a puddle of heartbreak and despair.
Her grip on his wrist tightened as if she feared he, too, would slip away.
"Pehle Mumma Papa ko humse cheen liya aur abh mujhe ek parivaar mila tha, aapke alawa, aur woh bhi mujhse cheen liya," she sobbed, her voice so raw that Karanveer had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep his own emotions at bay.
( First Mumma and Papa were taken away from us and now, when I finally found a family besides you, that too was taken away from me )
He swallowed the lump in his throat, his fingers pausing in her hair before continuing their soothing strokes.
His eyes burned, moisture gathering at the edges, but he refused to let his tears fall. Aaravi needed him to be strong. She needed an anchor, not someone who would drown with her.
He inhaled deeply before finally speaking, his voice rough yet unwavering.
"Tum shrapit nahi ho, princess⦠yeh duniya hi aisi hai," he murmured, his heart breaking with every word.
( You're not cursed, princess. This world is just like that )
"Par duniya ko sirf meri hi khushi kyun cheeni hoti hai?Kyun sirf mujhe hi itni takleef milti hai? Kyun haar baar mujhe itni dukh milti hai? Kyun haar baar mujhe tod deti hai? Kyun main khush nahi reh paati hoon? Kya main khushi deserve nahi karti?"she asked, her voice laced with an unbearable anguish.
( But why does the world only take away my happiness? Why am I the only one who has to endure so much pain? Why do I always have to suffer? Why does it break me every single time? Why can't I just be happy? Do I not deserve happiness? )
Karanveer closed his eyes, his hand tightening around her as he swallowed the lump in his throat. Her words felt like tiny daggers slicing through his chest, each one sharper than the last. He had no answersâno words that could erase the suffering she had endured. Karanveer let out a slow breath, his fingers gently stroking her back, his own eyes burning with unshed tears.
But neither of them noticed the man standing outside the room.
Nikshant.
His back pressed against the doorframe, his hands clenched into tight fists, his nails biting into his palms.
His breath hitched, his throat tightening painfully as her words echoed in his mind.
"Kya main khushi deserve nahi karti?"
( Do I not deserve happiness? )
His vision blurred, moisture gathering at the edges of his eyes.
He wanted to go to her.
To hold her.
To cry in her arms.
To beg for her forgiveness.
To plead until she looked at him with love instead of the emptiness that now clouded her once vibrant gaze.
"You deserve the universe with love and happiness, only," he murmured under his breath, the words never reaching her ears.
Because how could they?
How could he, the very reason she believed she was cursed, now tell her that she deserved the world?
He clenched his fists, his nails digging into his palms as he swallowed the emotions threatening to consume him.
His thoughts shattered when he heard Karanveerâs gentle yet firm voice.
"Sleep, princess. You need rest. Good night. If you need anything, just call me once, and your Veer bhai will be at your service, and lock the door."
Nikshantâs lips twitched, a sad chuckle escaping before he could stop it.
"Tu nahi badla, Karan," he whispered, the sorrow evident in his voice.
( You haven't changed, Karan. )
Nikshant pressed his back against the cold wall, his heartbeat loud in his ears as he heard the soft but steady footsteps approaching. His breath hitched, body going rigid as he held his position, unwilling to be caught lurking like a thief outside her door.
A second passed. Then another.
The footsteps faded.
Slowly, cautiously, he peeked from behind the wall, his eyes scanning the dimly lit corridor. Empty.
Exhaling, he stepped forward, his movements careful yet determined.
His gaze landed on her doorâthe door that separated him from his Cherry, from the love he had ruined, from the woman who had once belonged to him but now refused to even look at him.
And just as he reached out, just as he placed his palm flat against the wooden surface, ready to knockâ
The door moved.
Aaravi.
She was closing it.
Panic surged through him, his instincts acting before his mind could process, and he grabbed the door, stopping it from shutting him out.
Aaraviâs hand on the handle stiffened.
Her gaze flickered up, meeting his.
Emotionless. Cold.
A sharp contrast to the warmth her eyes once held for him.
Nikshant swallowed hard, his grip tightening on the door, refusing to let her lock him out.
"Please talk to me once, please," he pleaded, his voice trembling, his hands desperate to hold her, to feel that she was still real, still there.
But Aaravi?
She didn't move.
She didn't blink.
She just stood there, like an unyielding statue, like a storm that had already destroyed everything in its path and had nothing left to give.
"Please," he whispered again, his voice laced with an agony that refused to be contained.
Aaravi finally moved.
Her lips parted, her breath shallow.
"You want me to talk to you?" she asked, her voice eerily calm, as if she had nothing left inside her but emptiness.
"Okay, then just listen."
Nikshant nodded, his heart hammering inside his chest.
And thenâshe broke him.
"You only give me pain, Nikshant ji. Only pâpain."she stammered, her voice betraying her at the end, tears cascaded down her face, raw, unfiltered, as if her heart had finally shattered into pieces right in front of him.
And when she looked at himâreally looked at himâshe saw his tears too.
Her agony reflected in his eyes.
His pain a mirror of hers.
"Cherâ" he started, taking a hesitant step forward.
But she cut him off.
"Please," she begged.
Begged.
Joining her hands together, pleading as if asking him for mercy.
Mercy from him.
Nikshant's breath hitched, his whole world tilting at the sight.
But nothingânothingâshattered him more than her next words.
"I can't live without you, Cherry," he confessed, his voice cracking, his hands itching to reach for her, to wipe away the storm of tears that never seemed to end.
His love, his madness, his desperationâall laid bare.
And then, in a voice so broken that it felt like a wound ripped open, he whisperedâ
"You can give me pain too, Aaravi."her breath hitched.
"Agar tumhare saath rehke mujhe dard milega toh main sehne ke liye taiyaar hoon," he vowed, his voice shaking, raw with emotions that refused to be tamed,"Par tumhare saath nahi rehke jo dard mujhe milega, main uske liye taiyaar nahi hoon."
( If being with you means enduring pain, then I'm ready to bear it. But the pain of not being with you, I'm not ready for that )
Silence.
The air between them thick, suffocating.
Aaraviâs lips quivered, her nails digging into her palms as she took a deep, shuddering breath.
And then, with every ounce of strength left inside her, she whisperedâ
"I will not live with you anymore.Why can't you just understand? Just leave me for God's sake!"
His eyes widened, his body stiffened.
The pain in her voice was unbearable.
But his response?
Unshakeable.
" Hum jee nahi payenge aapke bina, Aaravi!"
(We won't be able to live without you, Aaravi! )
The door slammed shut with a resounding thud, cutting off Nikshant from the one person he couldnât bear to lose.
He flinched.
He closed his eyes and bit his lips hard, trying to control the sobs that threatened to escape.
But nothing could stop the way his heart clenched painfully inside his chest.
On the other side of the door, Aaravi stood frozen.
Her back against the door, her head resting against it as if it was the only thing keeping her upright, tears streamed down her face, silent but relentless.
Her whole body trembled, her hands clutching her dupatta as if holding on to somethingâanythingâto keep herself from falling apart.
And thenâhis voice broke through the silence.
A voice so desperate, so raw, that it clawed at her already bleeding wounds.
"Please na, Cherry..." her breath hitched.
"Bas ek mauka de do mujhe. Main sab theek kar dunga."
( Just give me one chance. I will make everything right )
A choked sob escaped her lips, but she quickly muffled it with her palm.
"Main tumhare liye woh ladka ban jaunga jaisa tumhe chahiye. Main khud ko badal dunga tumhare liye." Aaravi squeezed her eyes shut, her nails digging into her skin.
( I will become the guy you want me to be. I will change myself for you )
How could he say this now?
Nowâwhen everything was already shattered?
"Bas ek baar darwaza khol do, Cherry. Main tumhare pairon mein gir jaunga maafi ke liye." his voice cracked.
( Just open the door once, Cherry. I will fall at your feet to ask for forgiveness )
Aaravi gasped, pressing her hand harder against her mouth.
But she didnât reply.
She couldnât.
She wouldnât.
Because what was left to say?
She had given him everything onceâher love, her trust.
And in return?
He had destroyed her.
And now, he wanted to fix it?
No.
Some things couldnât be fixed.
Some wounds never healed.
Outside the door, Nikshant leaned his forehead against the wooden surface, his fists clenched at his sides.
He was losing her.
"Agar tumhe lagta hai ki main idhar se chala jaunga, toh tum galat ho." Aaravi stiffened, her fingers curling into fists.
( If you think I will leave from here, then you are wrong)
"Main yahan se tab tak nahi jaunga jab tak tum mujhe maaf nahi kar deti." his voice was quiet but firm, unyielding.
( I won't leave from here until you forgive me )
He didnât hear her say a single word to him. She ignored him again, as if he didnât even exist.
And it hurt.
With a weary sigh, Nikshant closed his eyes, letting the exhaustion pull him under. Slowly, he drifted into slumber, hoping sleep would offer an escape from the emptiness she left behind.
Tell me how the chapter was, I cried while writing it, feeling bad for both of them.
This book is about to end only 15 chapters are left. But I donât want it to end, I just love Aaravi and Nikshant so much.ð
I wonât be revealing Nikshant and Karanveerâs past in this book because if I ever decide to write a book about Karanveer, I might explore the past there.
Till then, bye-bye! See you soon with a new chapter.
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