Chapter 30: Chapter 30

*Strong 18+ warning for themes of abuse inc kidnap, SA and violence

All I could think about was how much my head hurt. It pounded like a herd of elephants were dancing inside my skull and a knife was being squeezed into my eyeballs to reach the back of my brain. Dan really let off steam the moment he dragged me from the car into what I can only assume is hell. I reached a shaky, blood-stained hand to the side of my head, gasping a sob to feel the short, wonky strands of hair left behind from when Dan yanked and chopped off handfuls of my beautiful, long hair. He left it surrounding me, just to torture me some more, I suppose.

It itched the back of my neck.

So itchy.

God, if I closed my eyes I could almost imagine the feeling of a hot shower.

The room I was in was cold, bare and dark. So dark, I could barely see three meters in front of me, but my eyes had adjusted now having been down here for a fair amount of time. It was a small room, a basement of sorts with nothing in it except a reinforced steel door and a little code lock on the wall next to it. The dim, red light from the lock was my only light and it did nothing to help me see. There was no window, so no way to tell whether it was night or day, but I judged it as daytime when Dan came down to enact some other sick fantasy he had dreamed up in his evil mind. It stank, a putrid smell of body odor, feces and piss coated every inch of air and I was unsure how much of it I was breathing in.

At least he hadn’t tied me up so I wasn’t left to sit in my own shit. I chose to relieve myself in a corner of the room, but only when I absolutely had to; when I felt like I would burst. A tear fell down my cheek at the humiliation I was feeling for simply being human, it was as though Dan was trying to dehumanize me and reduce to me nothing but a shell, a body to use and dispose when I was no longer any fun. I rubbed my hands between my thighs to warm them, grateful he hadn’t violated me sexually, although I knew that wouldn’t last forever. Soon, he would want me back in his bed, but when, I didn’t know.

It made me nervous, waiting for the inevitable. Part of me couldn’t wait, there was no way Dan would fuck me smelling like this, so at least I would get some element of a bath. I could handle the sex, that wouldn’t break me. I was a woman, I just had to lie there and close my eyes and think of something, anything that would take me away from the pain.

Mason’s arms. I smiled to myself as I imagined Mason curling his arms around me and pulling me tightly to his chest. I would think of Mason and I would think about laughing with Josie, Kate and Dee. I had so much happiness to think about that I knew I had to be strong, for them. Dan thought he could break me, steal my spirit and stamp on my soul but he had no chance.

I shivered and my stomach rumbled. How long was it since I ate? Dan hadn’t fed me since I arrived, only giving me water in a polystyrene cup to drink when he felt like it. I licked my lips; dry. I sighed, I really shouldn’t have thought about water, my mouth felt tacky and my throat was beginning to hurt.

Did dehydration make you feel sick?

I felt so sick.

Nausea suddenly built up in my stomach and erupted through my chest as I vomited bile on the floor, coughing as the acid burned my throat, I reached behind me to grab my hair and let out a sob when I realised I had no hair to hold. It was like a bob, only I could tell that it had been cut haphazardly and there were parts longer than others.

I never wanted to look in a mirror again, I must look absolutely horrific. I stood up, my brave façade stepping down for a moment as I took some shaky steps towards the door, hoping Dan was nearby.

“Dan!” I cried, my throat hoarse from the vomit. “Dan please, I’m so thirsty!”

Nothing.

“Dan! I-I’ll do anything, please I just want water,” I begged.

I waited by the door for an agonizingly long time before I collapsed to my knees, dizziness clouding my eyes and sending my brain spinning like I was on the waltzers. Was he done? Was this his method of making me so weak that I couldn’t fight back? Shutting my body down till I was on the brink? I gulped, even though there was no saliva in my mouth. I was surprised, I thought Dan preferred me with a bit of a fight in my system.

He must be getting old.

The thick, heavy, metal door opened with a groan and I was blinded with a sudden rush of light, quickly throwing my hand over my eyes to shield them after being in the dark for so long. I was never so close to the door when it opened, so it was never this bright before. I slowly removed my hand and blinked in the light, trying to make out the figure stood in front of me as I kneeled pitifully at their feet.

“Heidi, it smells like something died down here,” came the bemused remark from Dan as he knelt down and passed me a cup of water which I gratefully grasped in both hands and gulped down, as though I had been walking the Sahara desert for three days.

“I had nowhere to go,” I replied quietly, clutching the cup in my hands as though it would magically regenerate with water.

“Hmm, I would make you clean it, but that would do nothing about how much you stink. Did you sit in it?”

I looked up, embarrassment filling my whole body, “No,” I rushed, my voice cracking, “I-I went in the corner, but I had no way to wipe and-I haven’t washed in...”

“It’s been four days,” Dan responded nonchalantly.

“Four days,” I repeated.

“Well, I can’t even stand to be down here any longer, so I think you can come upstairs,” He decided.

I was ashamed to admit that my eyes lit up at that proclamation and I dropped the cup in excitement, “Really?”

Dan smirked, “Yes really. Up you get.”

I stood up so quickly that my vision went black and Dan reached out to grab my arms to steady me before I collapsed once more in front of him. I frowned once my vision went back to normal, why didn’t he just let me fall?

Was he feeling sorry for me? He was letting me out after all.

No,something inside me told me, he just wants you to be broken and stop fighting him.

I walked up the cold steps on shaky legs, still letting my eyes adjust to the light and taking in everything I could about where he had been keeping me. Dan opened a wooden door at the top of the steps and we entered a hallway of a seemingly normal house. A large man stepped around the corner and into view, he was huge and his shoulder length hair was matted in knots, his arms covered in tattoos that were barely visible due to the amount of dust and dirt coating his skin. He flashed yellowed canines at me and I shrunk backwards in fear, unknowingly hiding behind Dan.

“Do you share Daniel?” He smirked, looking around Dan’s shoulder to meet my frightened eyes once more.

Dan growled at him, “No, get your own.”

I balked and my blood ran cold, why had Dan growled?

Wolves growled. Dan was not a wolf.

Was he?

He grabbed my upper arm, not letting me think about it further as I was hauled upstairs and into a stark, plain white bathroom. Dan locked the door behind him and folded his arms as though he was waiting for something. I stared at him not moving, did he want me to get undressed? My stomach twisted with the thought.

“I really would love to take your clothes off Heidi, but I think your knickers are still covered in piss and even I don’t want to touch you while you smell like that. Strip and get in the shower, now.”

“P-please leave,” I stuttered.

“Now,” He repeated, folding his arms. “I’m not asking again.”

Dropping my gaze I pulled down the simple, black leggings I was wearing and stepped out of them, leaving them in a pile at my feet. I pulled off my t-shirt next and dropped that too, leaving me in just a bra and the wet knickers.

“I have missed you,” Dan said hungrily, unashamedly looking at my body like a starving dog about to be fed. He leaned past me and turned the shower on as I hastily unclipped my bra and removed the wet knickers, the skin of my inner thighs begin to feel sore from constantly being wet with acidic wee. I turned around, eager to get out of the prying eyes of Dan who just couldn’t help himself squeezing my butt as I stepped into the shower.

“I did really fuck up your hair didn’t I?” He laughed as I felt the blissful, lukewarm water cascade over my body. I turned round to partially face him, touching my hair as I did so.

“Why?” I asked him.

“You always loved your hair,” he replied, an evil smirk widening across his face.

I turned back around without giving him the satisfaction of seeing me cry. I grabbed the simple bar of soap on the side and quickly scrubbed it over my body, paying attention to under my arms, my vulva and butt; where I knew I had excrement and mess. Dan hadn’t been too physical, I didn’t have many deep wounds to which I was surprised about, I thought he would torture me until I was writhing in agony, but instead he chose to emotionally torture me instead.

“Are you done?” He snapped impatiently and I nodded my head quickly, dropping the soap back on the side and turned the shower off. I stepped out the shower and wrapped my arms around myself as I shivered, the cold air hitting my wet skin.

Dan opened the door and gestured to the hallway, “I prefer you naked, so I don’t think we need to find you any clothes. There’s a towel in that bedroom to dry yourself.”

“Please, there’s wolves here,” I begged.

Dan grinned at me and flashed a pair of canines at me, confirming my suspicions, “Darling, you belong to their leader, they won’t touch you unless I let them. Besides, I like having you on show and knowing you’re all mine.”

I took a few steps forward, making them as tiny as possible, hoping Dan may change his mind. I peeked my head around the door to find three disgusting men all waiting at the end of the hallway, obviously having heard Dan’s remark. I spun around to crash into Dan’s chest.

“Please don’t make me, I don’t want them to see me naked,” I cried, pushing against him to get back into the room.

Dan rolled his eyes and forcefully pushed me away from him, I flailed out as I lost my balance and fell backwards, banging my head against the wall and landing on my back. The three wolves burst into laughter as I reached up to cradle yet another headache, I was surprised I hadn’t sustained brain damage from the amount of banging my head had taken. I stood up, momentarily forgetting about the wolves as the pain in my head was all I could think about.

“I suppose I could give them a chase,” Dan mused, bringing me back to the present.

“What?” I turned to him, a chill coursing through my body reminding me I was naked in front of the three rogue wolves.

“3...2...1...Run.”

I ran.