Adolph
Pranav sprawls in the chair across from me, his face buried in his hands like a man questioning every life decision heâs ever made. I sip my whiskey, watching him suffer. Itâs quite entertaining.
"I canât believe this," he mutters, voice muffled. "Iâm a stalker. Youâre a kidnapper. Weâre horrible people, Adolph."
"Youâre just realizing that?" I raise an eyebrow. "I accepted my sins years ago, Pranav. Catch up."
He lifts his head just to glare at me. "No, see, I like to pretend Iâm better than you."
I chuckle, swirling the amber liquid in my glass. "And howâs that working out for you?"
"Terribly."He groans and drags a hand down his face. "I mean, I put a camera in a dressing table, Adolph. Who even does that?"
"Apparently, you."
"Shit."
"Yeah."
He sighs. "Meanwhile, you literally chained a woman up in your basement and are now forcing her to marry you."
"Sheâll thank me one day."
"You genuinely believe that, donât you?"
"Of course." I sip my drink. "Unlike you, I donât need camerasâI prefer to keep my woman right where I can see her."
"Thatâsâ" He points at me, opening his mouth. Then he pauses. "Actually, that might be worse."
"Might be?" I smirk. "Pranav, it is worse."
"God, weâre so messed up."
"Completely."
He groans, tilting his head back. "Weâre both red flags, arenât we?"
"Oh, no doubt."
"And idiots?"
"Absolute morons."
Pranav sighs dramatically, lifting his glass. "To being unhinged bastards with zero morals."
I chuckle, clinking my glass against his. "Cheers, stalker."
"Cheers, kidnapper."
We both take a long sip, sinking into the inevitable truth:
Weâre beyond saving.
And honestly?
Weâre fine with that.