Chapter 10: Hate Me

DANICA

“I need to get back home,” I murmured, avoiding his gaze. He looked at me as if I’d lost my mind.

“Even after all that, you’re still unsure?” he asked, as if it was perfectly normal to be told you’re some sort of mythical creature.

His face was a mask of anger, bordering on fury. “I’ve never even heard of such a thing,” I retorted, starting to walk in the direction he’d come from, but he grabbed my arm.

“You’re a celestial nymph, Danica,” he said, his voice filled with conviction. “You’re the spirit of the sky, the stars, every celestial being. You have the power to control the sky. There aren’t many like you. Ms. Moore is one of them.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “You’re meant to be part of nature, part of a world beyond the ordinary,” he continued, but I shook my head.

“I’m not,” I insisted, and he looked utterly taken aback. “I just need to go home.”

His nostrils flared with anger. “What about your headaches, Danica?” he asked, pulling something from his pocket. It was another glowing crystal, reminiscent of a star. He showed it to me, then squeezed it in his hand.

A sharp pain shot through my head, but it quickly subsided. I remembered the same pain from when he’d first shown up at Ms. Moore’s door. He’d been the cause of it.

“These headaches will stop if you accept who you are,” he said, returning the crystal to his pocket.

“It’s just a headache,” I said, though I wasn’t entirely sure. It felt good to be out in the night without the pain. I noticed his disgusted look.

“Why won’t you believe what you just saw?” he yelled.

“Because I don’t know that world!” I shouted back, my anger flaring. “I just want to live in peace, the way I’ve been living. I don’t want this in my life!”

“Why?” he asked quietly, his gaze locked on mine. “You have the chance to change everything about your life!”

“I…” My voice broke. I was alone. I wasn’t strong enough to face this by myself. “Please don’t push this. You’re just trying to make me go crazy, make me believe in something that isn’t real. You don’t need to chase after me to change my mind. I won’t.”

He released my arm, which he’d been holding to keep me from leaving. “I will never leave you,” he said.

I shook my head. “Don’t I get a say in this? Can’t I choose my own life?” I asked.

He looked at the ground, disappointment etched on his face. “You do, but that won’t make me leave,” he said, then started walking toward the car.

I had no idea where I was. I had no choice but to follow him. Once we were in the car, silence fell. An eerie, chilling silence.

He kept his eyes on the road as he drove, his left arm resting on the open window, his fingertips lightly brushing his lower lip.

“What’s your name?” I asked, the question seeming to come out of nowhere. I hadn’t even thought to ask before.

He drove on, the road ahead dark and empty. After a while, he finally answered. “You’re supposed to choose my name,” he said nonchalantly.

“You’re not my pet. I can’t just come up with a name,” I retorted, but he wasn’t joking.

“You don’t just think of a name. The name of your guardian angel comes to you,” he explained.

“Then how am I supposed to know?” I asked.

“You need to see it. You’re not looking, that’s why you don’t know.”

“Then what do others call you?” I asked, but he didn’t like that question. His hands tightened on the steering wheel.

“It doesn’t matter,” he snapped back. His name was clearly important to him.

“I’ll call you whatever you want,” I offered.

He shook his head. “It’s not supposed to be like that. From now on, my name will be given by you. Look for the signs the universe is giving you, and then you can call me by that name,” he said.

“What if I don’t see it?” I asked, and he looked irritated by my questioning.

“Well then I guess I’ll be nameless my whole life,” he snapped back.

“What if I just come up with a name…like Simon? How does that sound?” I proposed, noticing his jaw tighten considerably.

He halted abruptly in the middle of the street, turning to face me, his gaze more intense than I was comfortable with. His eyes seemed to sear into mine.

“Don’t label me with a false name. When you bestow my name upon me, I’ll know if it’s the right one,” he retorted, his gaze unyielding.

“I don’t give a damn about your opinion of me or the world I inhabit, but never dare to address me with a false name,” he warned, leaving me too intimidated to respond.

He was right there, inches from my face. Yet, he didn’t pull away. Instead, he continued to stare, as if in a trance.

My mind urged me to return his gaze, but my heart resisted. I was looking into something profoundly damaged. A soul shattered in ways that didn’t show on the surface.

I’ve always believed that people are more than what they reveal. But I had pegged him as just a nasty individual. Cold and impolite. Some people are just like that.

Time and again, he proved to be an enigma begging to be unraveled. But I wasn’t sure if he even recognized his own desire to be understood.

“May I ask you something?” My voice seemed to snap him out of his trance, and he quickly shifted his gaze to the deserted road.

“Look at me!” I demanded, my voice echoing in the silence. I began to second-guess my decision, but to my surprise, he obeyed. Slowly, he turned his head back toward me.

“If you’re my guardian angel, tasked with my protection, why did you frighten me? Why did you show up at the diner and terrify me?” There were countless other ways he could have approached me, but he chose the one that made me think he was unhinged.

Perhaps that was precisely why. Maybe he was unhinged.

He swallowed hard, taking a long moment to formulate a response. “I was creating an image you would remember,” he finally said, his voice softer, shaky.

I narrowed my eyes at him. “You wanted me to see you as a villain? Why?”

He attempted a smile, but it quickly faded. “I thought if I were repugnant enough, you’d keep your distance.”

His explanation was convoluted. “You’re the one who’s not keeping distance. I never asked you to follow me. You chose to!” My voice was rising in volume.

“I have to!” He spat out, his voice laced with anger.

Anger surged within me, but I bit back my retort. “Then go! Tell whoever’s in charge that you’ve done your duty and our deal is done. If necessary, I’ll vouch for you. I’ll say you were a delight to be around and that you excelled at your task. I’ll do whatever it takes!”

“I never said I didn’t want to be around you!” he yelled, immediately lowering his voice to a whisper. “I have to keep my distance. I have to make you despise me.”

He wouldn’t meet my gaze.

“What?” I was utterly bewildered.

“You wouldn’t understand!”

“Then explain it to me! Make me understand!”

He turned to face me. “No! I don’t want you to understand. I need you to be as far from understanding as possible.”

“Why?”

His eyes shimmered with sadness. “So that at least one of us isn’t in pain…”