Chapter 33: Chapter 23: Gorillas in the Midst

Harley finished the last of her cookies and licked some melted chocolate off her fingertips. While they had prevented the brain-swapping circumstances that had led to Lee’s initial cookie craving, the lingering memories, and therefore the cookie craving, remained. She and her friends now indulged in that craving with gusto. The trays barely had time to cool before they were picked clean, but the cookie dough was running out.

“I think I’ve got one more tray in me and then we’re done,” Lee said.

“That’s cool,” Harley said, slapping a hand against her bulging stomach. “I think I’ve already had too many.”

“Well, I don’t know, maybe we can just box them up and give them to our friends,” Vell suggested. He’d nearly hit his upper limit on cookies already.

“Haha, no, I’m eating all those sons of bitches,” Harley said. “And Lee’s barely had any, so she needs to get some too.”

Lee waved off Harley’s concerns, assuring them all she’d had enough cookies, but convincing no one. The next tray came out of the oven, was given just enough time to cool so that no one would burn their tongues, and then picked clean. Lee did end up taking the lion’s share, at her friends insistence.

“Ugh. I shouldn’t pig out like this unless it’s the first loop,” Harley said. “I got to go help Himiko with a project and then probably do two-thousand pushups to burn all these calories.”

“And here I thought you burned calories through vigorous sex,” Lee said.

“God, I wish,” Harley said. “But I can only ever do that on the first loop. Anyway, see you guys.”

Harley stood, grabbed her things, and headed for the door. She opened it, took one look outside, and then slammed the door shut, whipped around, and pressed her back to it.

“The gorilla’s back,” she said breathlessly.

“What?”

“The gorilla,” Harley said, emphasizing every syllable. “Is. Back.”

Harley stopped bracing her back against the door and walked around the room looking for something that could barricade the door. While she did so, Vell walked up to Lee’s front door, and opened it a crack. He peeked through, and the gorilla leaned forward to peek right back. Vell shut it instantly and put his own back to the door, mimicking Harley’s previous posture.

“Oh shit that’s a big gorilla.”

“Why did you open the door?” Lee demanded.

“I don’t know,” Vell said. “I wasn’t expecting an actual gorilla!”

“Everything you’ve seen this semester and a gorilla is where you draw the line?”

“It’s after the apocalypse,” Vell said defensively. “Things are supposed to be, like, normal now!”

Harley took time out from her fear to chuckle at Vell’s naivete. Then the fear resumed and Harley asked for helping pushing the table and some chairs against the door. Lee and Vell aided her in barricading the door and then they all fled to the opposite side of the room.

“What do we do now?”

“I’m good to cower for a bit,” Harley said. They went with her idea. The trio clung together and waited in breathless silence for any sign of motion or hostility on the part of the gorilla. None came.

“Maybe it left,” Vell suggested.

“I’m not checking,” Harley said.

“Oh, wait, I got this,” Vell said. He pulled his glasses out of his pocket.

“Ooh, do those things have x-ray settings? Have you been looking at people naked all the time?” Harley asked.

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“No and no,” Vell said. “They can thermal scan, though.”

“Nerd,” Harley said. Vell sighed and put his glasses on. He just as quickly took them off.

“Nope, definitely still a gorilla out there,” he said. Lee sighed and stood up from her cowering position.

“Well we can’t sit in the corner all night,” Lee said.

“Can’t we?” Vell asked. Lee shrugged. They could, but she didn’t want to. It would be bad for their knees.

“We should call someone, at the very least,” Lee said.

“Oh, I’ll text Leanne! She can probably take a gorilla in a fistfight.”

Harley pulled out her phone and pulled Leanne’s contact info. It had been a while since the two had texted, so she was at the bottom of Harley’s list.

HARL33:

hey leanne

hey!

gorillas back

trapped us in lees dorm

come fight it plz

Galgamesh:

Are you crazy?

I’m not fighting a gorilla.

HARL33:

why not!!!!!!! >:C

Galgamesh:

Animal cruelty.

Also, gorillas fight dirty.

Just stay inside and don’t provoke it.

Harley tossed her phone aside and crossed her arms in a huff.

“Well, Leanne’s useless,” she said. “Who else do we know that can fight a gorilla?”

“That is a very rare skill set, darling,” Lee said. “Perhaps we should simply stay inside and avoid the gorilla. It went away eventually the first time.”

“Went away?” Vell asked. “Where did it go?”

“I don’t know, Vell, it never occurred to me to ask,” Lee said. As intriguing as the mystery of a fully grown gorilla appearing and then disappearing on an artificial island was, Lee had higher priorities than solving the mystery of the gorilla, namely not getting mauled to death by the gorilla.

“Well, I guess, we, uh, wait, then,” Vell said.

He crossed his arms and sat down in a chair, occasionally glancing at the door to see if the Gorilla was still present. It was. Harley and Lee joined him in trying to relax. Several minutes passed in silence.

“If I’d known we’d be camping out here, I would’ve saved more cookies for later,” Harley said. Lee hummed in agreement. Vell did a gorilla check. It was still waiting just outside the door. Occasionally it scratched itself.

“So,” Vell said. “Other than the apocalypse, anyone do anything interesting today?”

“I did actually learn something new in Hydromancy class,” Lee said. “There’s an interesting trick you can do to conserve energy when making waves.”

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“And after my dad lassoed the cow, apparently I was supposed to tackle it? Like, uh, physically?”

“You’re saying that like you didn’t,” Harley said.

“I was fourteen,” Vell said. “And I was even scrawnier back then. Of course I didn’t tackle a full grown bull.”

“So you just let it get away?”

“Pretty much, yeah,” Vell said. “My dad was pissed, but he got over it. It was just one cow.”

“Fascinating,” Lee said. It narrowly avoided sounding sarcastic, though Lee was entirely sincere. She appreciated every glimpse into Vell’s relatively normal childhood. It helped her adjust the benchmarks of her own insane upbringing.

“So no chance of you doing a gorilla tackle, then,” Harley said.

“Definitely not,” Vell insisted.

“At this rate we’re going to be stuck here all night,” Harley whined. “I had stuff to do today.”

She put her head in her hands and moped. Lee rolled over in her seat and faced towards the door.

“How is it we’ve thwarted alien invasions but can’t handle a single gorilla at our doorstep?”

“We usually get an, uh, advance warning about the invasions,” Vell said. “The gorilla is a surprise.”

The next surprise came in the form of a knock at the door. All three froze in place, horrified at the possibility that the gorilla might have finally started to break down the door. The knocking was polite and ordered, however.

“Hey, I heard you guys were stuck in the dorm,” Renard said. “What’s going on?”

“There’s an adult male gorilla outside the door,” Lee shouted.

“No there isn’t,” Renard said. The three loopers shared a look and pushed the barricade away from the door slightly so that they could peek out. Renard waved hello, and the gorilla stared at them from over his shoulder. All three screamed at once. Vell grabbed Renard by the arm and pulled him inside as Lee and Harley slammed the door shut.

“You said there was no gorilla!”

“No, you said there was an adult male gorilla,” Renard said. “And there wasn’t. That’s a female gorilla. I assume. I don’t want to misgender anyone, least of all a gorilla.”

“That’s very kind of you, but I don’t know that the gorilla cares about such things,” Lee said. “You should stay here with the rest of us until it’s gone. Even overnight, if necessary.”

“I didn’t bring any PJ’s, though,” Renard said.

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Vell woke up pretty early. Lee’s couch was comfortable, but not that comfortable. Renard was still sleeping peacefully on a loveseat across the room. Vell groggily adjusted his slept-in clothes and grabbed his glasses off the side table. He turned on the heat scan and stared at the door for a moment. The heat signature of the gorilla was gone. Cautiously, Vell pried the door open and poked his head through. The earthy smell of gorilla musk still hung in the air, but there was no ape to be seen.

Vell took a step away from the gorilla stink and then breathed a deep sigh of relief. Nobody knew where it had come from, and nobody knew where it went, but the gorilla was gone.

For now.