Chapter 85: Book 2 Chapter 12: Garret Geist, Ghost Getter

Vell watched the cup float away. An icy trail of mist drifted in the air behind it.

“Harley-”

“It’s an ice elemental someone turned invisible,” Harley hissed.

“Right. And the doors slamming open and shut?”

“Malfunctioning door automation device.”

“Except it wasn’t,” Vell said. That had been the first thing they’d checked. “And what about the electronic flickering?’

“Random EMP bursts from the senior labs.”

“Harley, you know those are Faraday caged,” Vell said. “Why are you so afraid to admit there’s a gh-”

Harley jumped on top of Vell and pinned him to the ground. Which she had done multiple times before, but this was a very unsexy variant of her usual pounce. She had one hand clamped over Vell’s mouth and the other pressed against her own lips in a “shush” gesture.

“Don’t even say it,” Harley said. “This is not a joke. Do not say it.”

“I didn’t take you for being afraid of, uh, those things,” Vell said, once Harley’s hand was off his mouth.

“It’s not about fear,” Harley said. “I just have some extenuating circumstances involving my relationship with that certain variety of undead. We can talk about it later.”

The door to Harley’s dorm popped open, and Hawke poked his head through.

“Hey, you guys hear about the ghost?’

“Oh fuck.”

Hawke didn’t have time to react before the door burst open hard enough to launch him into the room and send him flying onto the couch. The thunderous crash of the door was matched by a cloud of confetti and a sharp chord of rock music, preceding the arrival of a jumpsuited man in a helmet. The costumed hero rolled into the dorm room, struck a dramatic pose, struck a different, even more dramatic pose, and then set his hands on his hips dramatically.

“Did somebody say ‘ghost’?”

The jumpsuited man posed once again, as his background music kept playing from a source no one could see. A beam of light shimmered across his goggles, despite the fact that there was no window to provide such sunlight, as Vell stared in confusion and awe and Hawke stared in upside-down confusion and awe. Harley just sighed.

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“Looks like a job for Garrett Geist, Ghost Getter,” he said. Garret crossed his arms and posed again, with one final music sting ringing through the air as his intro concluded. The last of the confetti settled on top of the stunned Hawke, and Garret finally took in his surroundings.

“Oh hey Harley.”

“Hi Garrett,” Harley said. She gestured to their dramatic new arrival and then to her shellshocked friends. “Garrett, this is Hawke, Vell. Guys, this is Garret. We used to date.”

“Yeah, way back in the day,” Garrett said, with a smile of fond remembrance. “Before her calling pulled her towards robotics, and mine called me to…”

He paused dramatically, and Harley cringed.

“The quest,” Garrett finally said.

“The quest?” Hawke asked.

“My lifelong mission. To use my skills to capture and contain ghosts, spectres, and wraiths of all kinds.”

Garret struck another pose. Vell wondered if it was tiring to constantly be posing like that, or if it came naturally.

“I do this not just for the safety and well being of those they haunt...but also to bring those poor lost souls to the peace they deserve.”

Garrett put a leg up on Harley’s coffee table and posed, staring towards an unseen horizon. Had Garrett not been wearing a helmet, Vell was sure his hair would’ve been blowing in the wind.

“Cool. If you, uh, want to get started, the ghost just took my cup and went that way,” Vell said, pointing in the direction the icy mist cloud had gone. Garrett Geist, Ghost Getter looked in the direction of a ghost to get and tightened his goggles.

“Thanks for the tip,” Garrett said. He reached into a pouch on his jumpsuit and then tossed Vell a small metal badge which said “Honorary Ghost Hunter”. “I’d wager everything should be back to normal within a few hours, so rest easy. And Harls, we should totally catch up afterwards. Drinks are on me.”

“Yeah, sounds like a plan,” Harley said. “Good luck with the ghost. Have fun.”

“It’s not about fun...it’s about doing the right thing.”

Garrett posed one more time to emphasize his point and then exited Harley’s dorm. Vell examined his Honorary Ghost Hunter badge once more before tucking it into his pocket.

“He seems nice,” Hawke said.

“Oh, he’s great, once he’s off the job,” Harley said. “When there’s a ghost to get, he’s always fucking posing and pausing dramatically, it’s insufferable.”

Harley had never been a fan of dramatic pauses, but dating Garret for half a year had given her enough dramatic pauses for a lifetime.

“And does he just show up whenever someone says the word ghost around you?” Vell asked.

“Only if there’s an actual ghost around,” Harley said. “I don’t think he does it on purpose, it’s just one of those things that sort of happens.”

“Guess that’s how things go around here,” Hawke said with a sigh.

“Oh this started way before I got here,” Harley said. “I dated Garret in high school. For the past seven years or so, every time someone points out a ghost around me, boom, there he is. At a restaurant, at home, in a classroom, doesn’t matter.”

“Do you have to clean up the confetti every time?” Vell asked, grabbing one of the colorful scraps of paper in between his fingers.

“Nah, that’s biodegradable. It’ll be a fine, non-toxic dust in hours,” Harley said. Vell raised a curious eyebrow and then tossed the scrap aside.

“Huh. He really is nice,” Vell said.

“Of course, Vell, I have good taste in men,” Harley said. “I fucked you, didn't I?”

Vell added that to the list of very odd compliments he’d received.