Chapter 90: ☽︎Heartless☾︎

Just a Feeling (Stiles x Reader)Words: 24292

...

Malia had tackled Theo and began punching him in the face repeatedly, giving him a bloody nose and a busted lip while she growled down at him. "It's okay, you don't have to stop." He muttered in a daze between hits.

"Trust me, I won't." Theo's eyes widened at the sight of her claws poised in the air to gut him.

Liam caught her wrist before she could do anything. "Malia, enough! Hey." Scott and Liam pulled the coyote off of Theo and a good few paces away next to Y/n who was standing to the side with her arms folded. Scott looked at her. "Why are you just standing there?"

Y/n shrugged. "I thought she was doing great."

Scott gave her an exasperated look. Malia feigned a lunge at Liam which made him jump away. "Slow down, okay?" Malia grunted in frustration. "He's going back in the ground."

"You can't." Liam quickly denied.

"Why the hell not?" Y/n demanded.

"He remembers Stiles."

"What?" Y/n's brows pulled together as they looked to Theo who was wincing as he tried to sit up again.

"Y/n and Scott remember Stiles. Lydia and I remember Stiles." Malia said.

"The Dread Doctors knew all about the Wild Hunt. He can help us." Liam insisted.

"Or he could kill us." Scott countered.

"He's my responsibility. Noshiko gave me the sword."

"It's so awkward when Mom and Dad fight." Theo quipped.

"Shut up!" The wolves ordered.

"You both are right." Hayden stepped next to Liam to help defend his point. "If Theo tries anything, we'll send him back to the skinwalkers. But for right now-"

"He's definitely going to try something." Y/n interrupted. "Instead of giving him a chance and wasting time we should send him back now."

"Except Liam's the one with the sword." Theo spoke up again, trying to get out of his situation.

"Shut up!" All five yelled this time. Scott gestured for Liam to follow him, giving them a bit of privacy to discuss things in the living room.

Malia set her sights on Theo, only for Hayden to step in her way. "Malia."

"Can you give me a second alone with Theo?"

"Why?"

"So I can kill him."

"Okay, look, I know that there's mixed feelings all around." Theo piped up.

"Understatement of the century." Y/n glared.

"But I might be your only option to stop the Wild Hunt."

"Let's kill him." Malia glared at him.

Y/n sighed as she put a hand on her sister's arm. "As much as I love that idea, Mal, we should wait to see what Scott decides." Malia huffed, but still waited.

"What, you don't trust me?" Liam asked Scott.

"I don't trust him. Do you?"

"No. But I think we can use him."

"Remember who he is. He got into your head and you tried to kill me. And when that didn't work, he did kill me. And Tracy, and Josh, and his sister."

"But this might be our only chance to get Stiles back."

"Can't we just try to find somebody we at least trust?"

"This might be a mistake. But you don't know that yet. And you made mistakes when you were learning to be an Alpha."

"Yeah, I made a lot. But we don't have time for mistakes. I can't lose Stiles."

"So we should try anything we can to save him. Right? Even Theo."

Scott closed his eyes for a moment. "Convince me."

Scott and Liam went back to the kitchen. They got Theo to his feet then the four stood behind the Beta as he held Kira's sword in his hand. "I can put you back in the ground anytime."

"You also need a transformer that can handle five billion joules of electricity." Theo said.

"Can't Y/n handle a lightning bolt?" Malia asked.

"There's a difference between redirecting energy and redirecting someone's ride." Y/n said.

"I know where to find one," Theo continued about the transformer, "and I can show you how it works. I'll tell you if Malia promises not to kill me."

Malia growled as Liam nodded. "She promises."

"No, I don't." She turned to Scott. "We're really gonna do this? Trust him?"

"You got a better idea?" Hayden asked.

"I've got an idea. It may not be better. But at least it's not him." Malia took Y/n's hand and pulled her along as she began to leave, only pausing when Y/n stopped next to Liam.

"I hope you have a plan B in case this doesn't work out." She said before she let Malia continue leading her out of the house.

...

M/n looked up from her spot at the kitchen table as she heard footsteps on the stairs before Y/n came through the room. "Hey, where are you going?" She asked out of curiosity.

Y/n hesitated for a moment when she saw her mother there. "I'm going with Malia to the hospital." She finally answered.

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah, no, she's fine. We're just going to talk to Scott's mom about healing Peter so he'll help us find the ghost rider's rift." Y/n explained as she avoided looking at M/n. She felt a little uneasy seeing her after the things that happened in Canaan.

"Peter?" M/n's eyes widened slightly, any curiosity about her daughter's behavior overshadowed by the man's name. "You mean Peter Hale?"

"Yeah. My father Peter." Y/n reminded as if it should have been obvious, glancing up to see that this only shocked the woman further.

"You... You know about that?" Her voice had dropped to an almost whisper, Y/n still heard her despite this.

"Of course I know about that. I found out when the dead pool was active." Y/n looked away as she recalled seeing the list with her and Malia named as a Hale, how she distanced herself from everyone for a while as she processed the news. "Malia and I found out that we're sisters. I was so hurt because everyone else seemed to know before I did, but I talked it out with them. I talked to Scott, Lydia, Alan..." Y/n's mouth felt dry as she tried to remember how she had reconciled with M/n like she had the others. But, "Why don't I remember talking to you?"

"Y/n..." M/n gently called as Y/n frowned.

After Canaan Y/n had talked to Lydia about the horrific scene she saw, the one that felt more like a memory than anything. Y/n explained what she saw, what she felt, and about some things that hadn't made sense, and while Lydia tried to be her voice of reason, Y/n couldn't shake the uneasy feeling off. "Peter was your heart, you should have wanted to be with him since we came to Beacon Hills. Why can't I remember seeing you together?"

"Y/n, please-"

"Where were you when he was killing people? Where were you when he was put in Eichen? It just doesn't make sense. And the way you've been acting, like you're hearing things for the first time." She finally looked up at her mother.

"I can explain." M/n stood from her chair, moving to stand in front of her daughter.

"We went to a place called Canaan, a ghost town. Everyone was taken by ghost riders except for a woman named Lenore and... You. She couldn't handle what happened, so she conjured a phantom to cope. Her son, Caleb." M/n rested her hands on Y/n's shoulders, feeling them start to tremble as the girl still tried to deny the truth that was surfacing. "Mom, why can't I remember us here together?" Y/n's eyes darted between M/n's own, looking for answers. "In Canaan, I- I saw something. Lydia told me it was just a hallucination, but it felt like more than that. You were there, you said someone was coming after us. You made me run. And then there was fire and you... You were screaming." Her eyes silently pleaded the woman to explain away the awful memory.

All M/n could do was look at her in sadness. "Honey..." She moved her hands up to Y/n's cheeks, gently holding her face as Y/n came to the world shattering realization.

"It was real?" Y/n's voice became thick with welling tears. "It's true? You're really... Are you really gone?"

"I'm so sorry." Y/n sobbed and M/n pulled her into her arms, holding her as she cried. "Why didn't you tell me? Why did you let me think that night never happened?"

"I guess I just wanted to be a little selfish." M/n admitted. "I wanted to see how my little girl grew up, what kind of woman she became."

"What happens now?" Y/n asked as she pulled away to look at her face again. "Do you just disappear? What-"

"I'm here for as long as you need me. Until the hole in your chest is filled again, until you get your heart back, I will be right here to help you."

"But I don't want to lose you again."

"And I don't want to go again either, but I'm just so thankful for the extra time I've gotten to have. Y/n, this is a gift. Not everyone gets to have this, we need to be grateful for it."

"I know, I know. I am. I promise."

M/n smiled. "I know you are." She pressed a kiss to Y/n's forehead before pulling her close again. The two witches just stood there in the kitchen for a while, holding each other.

Y/n's brows furrowed as something occured to her and she pulled away to look at M/n. "I don't understand something. How come I couldn't feel you were, I don't know, different? Why do you still feel like you? Caleb didn't feel empty, really, but he didn't feel as whole as you do."

"Phantoms are tricky. If someone is inexperienced, like Lenore was, or if it's someone with no ability at all trying to fill a void, the phantom would be a shell. Either empty or only half full. I'm me because of you."

"You're just as bad as Alan with the cryptic answers." Y/n huffed.

"Well, he is my best friend." M/n smiled cheekily. "Here, let me try to explain better." She ushered Y/n to the table, and the witches sat down together. "Witches are often a bridge between this world and what comes after. When you lost Stiles your magic worked on instinct to heal the void left behind, but you can't heal a wound like that. You unconsciously made a phantom, you made me, and your magic called out to my spirit. It's the reason I'm able to be myself, and not a shadow."

"Like Caleb. Lenore didn't know what she was, and so Caleb is only half of himself." M/n nodded. "How come you never mentioned them? Or Canaan?"

"You were only a child before I..." She shook her head a bit. "I would have mentioned it when you were older, but I never got the chance."

"You have the chance now."

"I thought you said Malia was coming to get you?"

"We have enough time. Please? I wanna hear about it." M/n lightly sighed, but smiled. She couldn't deny her daughter, so she told her a bit about her childhood.

M/n was an only child, although her parents had wanted more children, her mother had died before they had the chance. Her father had an interesting time trying to raise a budding witch, but he managed with what he got from his wife's grimoire. She had a great childhood, and Canaan was one of the best places to raise a family. Until the riders came. Just like they had in Beacon Hills, they gradually began to take people, before making one final sweep, coming in as hard as a storm as they took everyone. When she witnessed her father disappear in a green cloud she ran to the only other adult she could think of. Lenore, her mother's best friend and her god mother. When the riders left them, she thought she'd be safe, but she quickly realized Lenore wasn't herself, and when Caleb suddenly appeared one day she became spooked once again. She fled one night, taking only a small bag of clothes, a couple pictures that she managed to save from her house, and her mother's grimoire. She walked along a road that eventually led her to Beacon Hills. There she met Talia and Peter Hale, and the young woman took her in.

Before M/n could go into more detail about her life in Beacon Hills there was a honk outside, Malia announcing her arrival. Y/n tensed, her grip on her mother's hand tightening slightly. M/n promised that she would tell Y/n more of her life if there was time before giving her an encouraging smile and assured once again that she wouldn't just vanish while she was gone. With the extra assurance Y/n reluctantly left. After the door closed behind the teen M/n lightly hummed to herself as she got an idea. A lot was happening, and there was the possibilty she would yet again lose the chance to tell her everything she wanted to. With a quick drum of her fingers on the table, she got up and left the kitchen.

Things were silent as Malia drove, and while she usually liked the silence, something about this felt off. Malia gave Y/n a glance from the corner of her eye as she looked out the window. "What's wrong?" The coyote suddenly asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You smell like you've been crying. Why?"

Y/n was quiet for a moment. "I just remembered something really sad earlier."

"Well... Are you okay now?"

Y/n smiled at her sister's concern. "I will be." She promised.

When they got to the hospital they found Melissa and Malia explained her idea. Melissa had gotten Peter's file, flipping through it before looking to the girls. "He has third degree burns over 90% of his body. I should be telling you to say your goodbyes."

"He's honestly come back from worse." Y/n commented.

"We need you to fix him so we can find out what he knows about the Wild Hunt." Malia said.

"Remember who we're dealing with. Your father is a ruthless con man who always has a devious plan to hurt everyone around him. What happens when he gets up out of that bed? You got a plan of your own?"

"She has a plan."

"I don't know if it's devious."

"At least it's a plan." Malia smiled a little. After getting what she needed Melissa lead the girls through the hospital and to a room where they were keeping Peter behind plastic partitions to protect him from outside elements. "I can't promise this will work."

"You said he was dying anyway. What does he have to lose?"

"I can hear you." Peter spoke up, his usual sass still shining through his charred voice. "I'm not dead yet."

"Your point?" Y/n asked. Melissa pushed aside one of the partitions, the three walking through to stand at his bedside.

"I think they put that there to protect me. Glad to see you're obeying hospital protocols."

"Your daughters asked me to treat you."

His eyes flicked between the teens before settling on Melissa again. "In exchange for what?"

Melissa looked at the girls. "Told you, you needed a plan."

"She helps you, you help us." Malia explained plainly.

"That's a bit open-ended. What if I don't agree to your conditions?"

"Then you stay looking like charbroiled roadkill and she leaves you for dead." Y/n titled her head in gesture towards Melissa.

He sighed. "So, what exactly do you know about our kind of medicine?"

Melissa pulled a syrenge from her pocket filled with a dark green substance. "I know about the Nine Herbs." Peter's eyes widened and he grunted in pain as, without warning, she stabbed the needle into his chest and pressed on the plunger. Green foam started pooling from his mouth as he writhed on the bed.

"Think it's working?" Malia wondered.

"Should be. Looks painful enough."

After a gross process of the dead skin peeling off to reveal fresh, healed flesh he got dressed and the girls held his arms over their shoulders, helping him walk as Melissa lead the way to the elevator. She pressed the button and the elevator dinged. Peter looked at her. "You know we never did have that second date." Melissa gave them a look and the sisters let their father drop to the ground like a sack of potatoes as the elevator doors closed.

Unfortunately they had to pick him up again to get him to Malia's car, but they let him collapse into the backseat as Y/n's phone buzzed. She perked up in surprise when she saw a message from Noah asking her to come to his house because of something he found. "I have to go. Can you handle him on your own?" She looked to Malia who nodded.

"I've got it. Go. I'll call you if we find anything."

"Be careful out there." Y/n said, Malia nodding, before she left her to deal with Peter.

When she got to the Stilinski household Noah led her upstairs and down the hall where she saw a large portion of the wall had been removed to reveal a hidden door. Noah stepped into the empty room and Y/n hesitantly followed. Looking around the bare space, small rays of light filtering in from the broken shades and highlighting cobwebs in the window, she couldn't help but feel it was wrong. It shouldn't be this empty and dull. She felt like it was usually so full of life.

"You knew about it, didn't you?" Noah asked. She turned to look at him before she gave a nod with a slight shrug. "God, it was on the blueprints. It was here when we moved in. That was 18 years ago." When Y/n looked around again she was surprised to find a bed had appeared in the corner, fitted with blue sheets that weren't completely straight. More things started to show up as she made a slow turn around the room. A corkboard on another wall, a movable glass board with lights above it, a desk with a chair. Her hand came up to touch the glass board. "Y/n?" She looked at him. "What is it?" She turned and the things were gone again so she let her hand fall.

"You..." She wanted to ask You didn't see that? but she already knew that he hadn't.

"I don't understand how you knew this was here."

She lightly shrugged. "I just... Followed a feeling."

"If you want to discuss the possibility that I had a son... I'm listening." She took a breath before she went over and closed the door to give them some privacy, wanting to avoid any unwanted eavesdroppers. She looked back at him, hesitating for a moment because she wasn't sure he was quite ready for what she was going to tell him. When Y/n and Lydia had been talking about things after Canaan, as a distraction because she could tell Y/n was getting upset about the topic of M/n, Lydia had brought up Claudia Stilinski. The girls then discussed the few anomalies around the woman and how Y/n had felt around her. Lydia had given her working theory that maybe Claudia was in fact a phantom like Caleb, and that her being here was preventing Noah from remembering his son. Y/n had agreed with her idea, it would explain the emptiness she had felt when Claudia had grabbed her. These were all things Y/n had told Noah and he was having some trouble comprehending. "So, wait a sec. So- so, this woman 'Lenore', she conjured up her dead son?"

"She was the only one left after the riders came and that left a void. She filled it with her son."

"And you saw this kid?"

"He tried to drown me." Noah gave her a strange look. "My point is he was real. He was there. But..."

"But what?"

"She saw when everyone was taken, and it was so tragic. She didn't want to believe it, she wanted to believe in her son."

"What are you trying to say? You think Claudia is not real? You- you think I made up a phantom wife?"

"You had to fill a void."

"She's a flesh and blood woman. She's real. Everything else here is just- is just speculation. Conjecture. It's just- it's a theory based on a-" He scoffed. "On a ghost town."

"My mother died when I was 7." Y/n stated bluntly, trying to get him to see her point.

"What?"

"I conjured her to fill the void Stiles left behind. She's a phantom." Y/n's voice lowered as she said this, the knowledge of it still fresh and still painful.

"What the hell are you talking about? I saw her the other day, how is she dead?" Y/n didn't answer as her eyes had drifted to somewhere behind him. There in the corner, where there was nothing a moment before, was a chair, a lacrosse helmet on the seat, and a jersey thrown over the back sporting the number 24. The same number she had worn when trying to protect Gwen and the others.

Her eyes were glued to the shirt as she walked over to the chair, afraid that if she blinked it would disappear like the other things had before. Slowly she reached out, fingers trembling slightly as they made contact with the shirt, and she let out a huff of relief. Gently she picked it in her hands, feeling the fabric between her fingers. She brought it closer to her face as she sniffed the scent still clinging to it. Earthy, like trees, moss, and petrichor. It was so familiar and felt so much like home that it coaxed a tear to fall from her lashes as she breathed it in.

Y/n turned to Noah with the shirt clutched in her hands to show him, but he just looked at her in concern. "You don't see anything." She realized.

To Noah it just looked like she was holding air. "I see a deeply disturbed young woman."

Her expression hardened as she looked at the man. "You can think I'm crazy all you want. But that still doesn't change the fact that you're scared to remember him because you're scared of what that would mean."

"Why do you care so much if I remember him?"

"Because you love him." On a whim she tossed the shirt at him, and on reflex his hands came up to catch nothing. Then suddenly he was holding a lacrosse jersey in his hands.

...

"Take the next left, cut over to the highway. And then don't stop." Peter directed as Malia drove them towards the Beacon Hills Preserve.

"We have a deal. I'm not leaving without Stiles."

"You're so very loyal, Malia. And that is an overrated quality." She ignored him as she pulled up to the sign blocking entry after dark. They got out of the car, but as Malia headed further in Peter stuck by the vehicle. "You know, I was in pretty bad shape when you found me. I don't really have a clear picture of where I was."

"I marked the territory." His face scrunched in slight disgust. "Visually. I marked it visually. But we didn't see where you came out."

He closed the car door and begrudgingly followed after her. "It's a supernatural rift, Malia, it's not the Golden Gate Bridge. I doubt we could even see it, let alone get through. This is a horrible waste of time."

"You promised us. On your deathbed." She reminded.

"I just saw a kid get burned alive trying to escape the Hunt. You try and save Stiles, he's gonna die the same way. Humans can't get through."

"Then we'll find another way to get him out. But first we have to get in."

He stopped walking for a moment. "You have no self-preservation instincts. How are you my daughter?" He wondered to himself before continuing to follow her. After a bit of walking he tried again to talk his way out of this situation. "I think you need to admit that you have an unhealthy attachment to Stiles. You got to let him go." Malia growls. "Would you please try to behave like a human?"

"I need Y/n for that which means I also need Stiles for that."

"Why? Are they your human crutch?"

"They're my anchor."

"You've still got Y/n. I'll get you a new co-anchor. He's not comin' back. He was hunted. He got caught."

She stopped and turned to face him. "You don't believe that. You risked your life to bring us his keys."

"I risked myself to escape the Hunt. Not to reunite sentimental teenagers."

She turned and started walking again. "You wanted us to know about Stiles. And Canaan. You were warning us." She stopped again when she came upon the spot where she, Y/n, and Scott had found Peter. "This is where we found you."

Peter tossed his hands up as he glanced around, moving to stand in front of her. "Like I said, there's nothing here."

"You're not even looking."

"You can't just poke around and expect to find a supernatural train station." He stopped his pessimism as the sound of galloping and a distant shriek caught his attention. He turned to look in the distance behind him. "Do you hear that?" A horse neighed and his face fell.

Malia soon picked up on the noises, the audible que that the riders were coming. "It's them?"

"Yeah. And judging by the sound, we don't have a lot of time."

"For what?"

"For you to run."

"You're leaving me?"

"I'm saving you." He corrected as he looked at her.

"But if we can hear them, it must be close."

"There'll be another chance." He promised, stepping closer as he spoke. "Go now." Malia looked at him in slight surprise. "Malia, run! Go!" Malia finally moved, turning tail and running as fast as she could back to her car. Peter turned to face the riders, shifting as two of them approached. He knew he had no chance, but he could at least give Malia some time to get away. Peter roared as they drew their guns and aimed. Before they could shoot the horses suddenly reared up, whinnying in alarm as the riders shrieked. The riders turned and left as quickly as they arrived, something coming up that was more important than catching a wayward werewolf too close to their portal, leaving Peter standing there in confusion.

~~~

Published: 4/19/23

I kinda feel like you guys forgot Y/n's mom was dead, because there was almost no reaction when she suddenly showed up a few chapters ago XD. That was the heartbreak/pain I was talking about before. M/n will be lost to Y/n once again because she is indeed a phantom.