DIMITRIS POV It was so f*****g hard talking about all this. Even with Lily. I hated the pity in her eyes, but she had a point; I couldnât ask for something I wouldnât give her. So I laid it all out in the open, hoping it was a stepping stone for her.
âI donât know what you want me to do.â Lily choked out.
I let my face soften. âI want you to open up Lily. I want you to talk to me, to trust me. Just like I did with you, just now. If not to me, then to my sister. Or take her offer, and see a therapist. I know you hate the idea, but if you keep everything inside forever, it will eat at you forever. I love you; I donât want you to be held back because of your past.â
Her hands knotted the blanket, her teeth rolling over her bottom l*p.
âDid it help you?â She mumbled finally.
âTalking to you?â
She nodded.
I thought about it for a minute. âIt did. Iâll be honest, I could do without the pity Iâm getting from you. But I guess that means you care. But I feelâ¦lighter.â I admitted. In all truth, it felt like a huge weight was lifted from shoulders. She was the only person Iâd confided all that to. The way I felt, my inner thoughts and demons. And it felt good. I only wanted the same for her.
âI donât know how.â She finally said. âI donâtâ¦I donât want you to look at me different. I donât want you to see me⦠the same way as before.â
I shook my head. âI wonât. Iâm sorry I hurt you. Iâm sorry my past affected our relationship. And Iâm sorry I couldnât get past it until now.â I took her hand and pulled her over to me, wrapping my arms around her waist. âI guess I lied, kind of. Itâs not that I didnât want you, I always wanted you. I was just too much of an i***t to admit it, to want to admit it. Even to myself. But I always knew how strong you really were, deep inside. Ajax definitely knew. I promise I wonât judge you, or look at you differently than I do now. I just want you to be safe, happy. And healthy, and keeping everything inside isnât safe, happy, or healthy.â
She stared at me with wide, glassy eyes. Her bottom l*p quivered slightly. Lying her head against my chest, she started to talk. A little at first, and then waves of tears streamed down her cheeks and onto my skin, mixing with her words as her story poured out of her.
âOn my ninth birthday, I got a piece of moldy bread and sour milk. Theo ordered a big cake to be made, enough to feed the whole packhouse. I was ordered to serve it, and then sit in the corner and watch as they celebrated my birthday without me. I got sick from the bread and milk, and they just dumped me in the basement. I was forced to work the next day even though I was sick⦠I threw up all day. I threw up in the kitchen when I was making lunch and Esther⦠she⦠she.. I got twenty lashes for it.â
I held her tightly, not once interrupting and trying so f*****g hard to keep my emotions at bay. She could feel them through our bond, and I didnât want her to know just how angry I was. I should have killed those two when I had the chance.
âTheo used a silver knife on me for the first time when I was twelve.â She stopped and I waited. The tears never stopped, and I tensed.
âWhy?â I asked as calmly as I could, but she shook her head. I didnât want to push her, but she was finally talking, finally letting it out. âWhy?â I asked again.
Lily choked on her breath, burying her face so hard into the crook of my shoulder that it hurt.
âI-I asked him if⦠if I could have one o-of Evelyns old b-bras. I was starting toâ¦. develop. H-he⦠He⦠told me to.. prove it.â
My hands fisted behind her back, Ajax jumping to the surface. I held him back by inches.
âI d-didnât want to. I refused. H-he said I-I was lying a-and he⦠he r-ripped my shirt off. I covered m-myself.â Her voice lowered against my skin. âBecause I wouldnât⦠he cut me.â Her tiny voice cut on a sob.
I was fuming, not even able to keep it from her. The anger was so fierce, it travelled through the bond like fire. But I had to know.
âDid he ever⦠did anyone ever.. touch you?â I ground the words out. I knew she was a virgin, or had been, but if they forced her to other things⦠I swear, I would run to that pack tonight with my warriorsâ¦
âNo.â Lily hiccuped against me. âI never let it happen.â
Thank the Goddess for that small mercy. However, Theos fate was now sealed. I wouldnât hunt him down, I didnât have to, but he was a dead man walking. His days of breathing and tainting fperfectly good air were officially numbered.
After a couple minutes, Lily continued. I listened intently, stroking her back, her hair, her arms. By the time she finished, her cheeks were raw and her voice was hoarse. The things Iâd heard tonight would haunt me forever. My mate cried for another hour and a half, screaming through her tears and I let her. She was a tornado of emotions that she deserved to be allowed to finally release. Throughout the storm, I offered her unlimited support anyway she wanted it. And when she finally fell into an exhausted sleep, I simply covered her with the blanket and kissed her forehead before lying beside her.
Iâd been wrong before; She was stronger than grandma. I doubt even she could have survived what Lily had. Hell, I would given up long before this. It was a miracle she was here, in my bed alive and breathing. The thought made me pull her closer, wanting to protect her from everything. I felt guilty pushing her to do this; it might have been unfair. But sheâd held it all in for so, so long. I could only hope she felt better in the morning.
For me though, sleep was impossible. I spent the night staring at my mate. While I did that, I planned different ways I was going to kill Theo and his mate. Perhaps not their daughter though, if she truly showed she regretted everything she did. And honestly, she didnât do half of what her parents did. A misled child, forced to act in ways she didnât understand because thatâs what sheâd been taught. Still, she had a lot to make up for.
It was around four in the morning when Lily suddenly shot straight up. Immediatly, I looked around the room, searching for any signs of danger.
âWhat? Whatâs wrong?â I asked panicked.
Lily didnât answer me. Instead, she jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom. A second later, I heard the sound of her vomiting. I was right behind her in a matter of seconds, holding her hair.
âAre you okay?â I asked anxiously. f**k, had I stressed her that much? Was this my fault?
âWater. Please.â She panted.
âHang on.â
I ran to the kitchen, getting her an unopened water bottle. She took a couple small sips when I brought it to her.
âItâs so f*****g cold in here.â She muttered.
âDo you want me to run you a bath? Or a shower?â
âHmmâ¦maybe. I donât know.â She sighed, leaning her head against the toilet seat. âIâm so tired now. F**k.â
âCome on.â I capped the water and scooped her up, waiting to see if she felt sick again. When she nodded the okay, I walked her back to bed and covered her back up. She was out in seconds, the water bottle resting against her cheek.
Sheâd been getting sick a lot lately. Was she this stressed out? My stomach knotted all over again with the fact that Iâd forced her to relive her worst memories hours after she got the shock of meeting her Father. Goddess, was I the stupidest mate ever? It could have f*****g waited. Feeling like s**t, I crawled in beside her, wrapping my arms around her and giving her my warmth.
At some point, shadows from the rising sun streaked across the room; I hadnât slept a wink. Lily stirred in my arms, her arms stretching out.
âMGry.â She mumbled sleepily.
âWhat?â I chuckled.
âIâm hungry.â She announced clearly this time.
âYou feel okay to eat?â
âMhmm.â She rolled over, kissing me heartily. âHow about we start with a snack before breakfast?â
I raised my eyebrows. âSeriously? You were puking not five hours ago.â
âIâm not puking now.â Her lips moved to the mark on my neck, biting gently. My d**k instantly stood at attention.
âMaybe you should eat first.â I gulped.
âOkay.â
With a cheeky smirk, my mate lowered herself slowly until she had me in her mouth. Not what I meant, but Iâd take it happily.