Chapter 41: His Mind
A/N: COOKIES! We managed to hit #1 in teen fiction! Thank you so much for the support! I'm so overwhelmedð¥ºð
ðAlec's P.O.V
Ellie.
To anyone it could be consider as just a name. It can be for a girl, a name for a princess, or even a fucking empress.
For me though?
It's a name that I would proudly like to call mine, someday.
Ellie Haven. She's the girl who can bring out a whole wave of emotions within me, she makes my heart go boom boom and somehow, my demons suddenly sprouts angel wings when she's around.
She makes me feel human and less of a monster.
I stared at the ceiling, biting my lip when her angelic face popped into my mind. Just the thought of her sends warmth through me and no, its not that kind of warmth so get your brain out of the fucking gutter.
I'm a turning into a damn pùssy but its only for her and for me, that's absolutely okay.
The first time I met her, I wanted to spank her cute ass, with her consent of course, for talking back to me but when she kicked my balls, I knew I had to get to know her.
It isn't everyday that I come across a woman who can meet me head on and not cower away because of my reputation.
Men hate me for doing shit that they don't have the balls to do and women only see me as challenge and a trophy to claim.
To any fuck guy, it would be consider heaven but for me it was hell.
It isn't cool when girls stalk you, accidentally bumps into you to get a small grope on the muscles, or how they would throw theirselves for an easy fuck.
Women can do what they want but don't let your dignity turn into trash just because of physical attraction.
I consider myself to lucky to have come across a woman like Ellie Haven. She's bold but gets shy when given a compliment, she likes to read but can handle her tequila quite well, she prefers comfy clothes but she rocks them like no one else.
I sound like a fucking creep for knowing things like these but we're talking about the woman who managed to capture my heart fellas.
I like Ellie, I genuinely do despite my fuck up ways in showing it. I just wasn't used to exposing my emotions like that and it scares me how easily I could fuck things up.
I'm demanding, selfish, and an idiot sometimes but Ellie accepts me wholeheartedly and that's all the reassurance that I need that a monster like me could be loved too.
That's why I felt like a total failure when I couldn't find her anywhere and my guilt was like a sandpit pulling me in when I saw how she was covered with bruises.
I let out a yawn, glancing at the wall clock and seeing it was past eleven. It's been two hours since Ellie went to sleep and a pout made its way into my lips.
I wanted to cuddle with her tonight but I guess she wanted to be alone. I just hope that she doesn't decide to leave me because of all the shit I put her through.
I turned to my side, already knowing that I have no choice but sleep next to the guy who was snoring like damn grandpa beside me.
The airbed shook lightly when I pulled half of the blanket towards me, throwing an annoyed look at Chase who not only snores but because he's a damn blanket hogger too.
I turned my back to him, letting out another yawn and it didn't take seconds before I fell asleep.
I woke up to faint voices talking and a small groan left my mouth, turning to the other side and tried to go back to sleep.
It sucks being a light sleeper, just a small noise and bam, my mind's running. It didn't help that I can't go back to sleep easily once I wake up the first time around.
My body paused, realizing that the faint voices came from the guest room where my baby was staying.
Without even a second, my body lurched out of the bed and almost fell first face on the floor when my legs got tangled up with the blanket.
I didn't bother wearing a shirt and although my nipples were freezing, it didn't bother me one bit.
The door to Ellie's room was slightly ajar and I was about head in and pummel the person who's trying to take her away when I realized who it was.
Chase.
Chase and Ellie who had her arms around him and vice versa. Ellie was hugging Chase and he seemed to be comforting Ellie.
I step back in surprise, my heart twisting painfully at the sight. Jealousy slithered its way to me and I couldn't help but want to bash Chase's head for touching her.
Why are you fucking jealous?âThe little demon in my head asked.
What kind of fucking question is that? Obviously because I don't like any male touching her.
Chase is my friend and I trust them both but the fear of Ellie leaving me because of my heavy baggage is enough to water the seed of my jealousy.
You ain't even dating and you acting like a jealous boyfriend.
I took her on date and I'm courting her, doesn't that count as something?
That all counts as something when she finally agrees to be your boyfriend which you are currently not right now.
I clenched my jaw in annoyance, not bothering to stick around and head back to other guest room.
She can't possibly like Chase right? No, I shake my head. Ellie likes me, she wouldn't leave me like that.
I'd leave you in a heartbeat if it were me, the little demon snorted.
Good thing you aren't Ellie then, shut the fuck up you little demon.
I sat at the edge of the bed, my feet on the ground and my body facing the door. I glared at the wall, my thoughts pissing me off.
I'm not a demon, I'm your subconscious fucktard.
I rolled my eyes at this, taking deep breaths to calm myself down. There's no need to be jealous Alec, its all in your brain man.
The pesky demon kept saying shit in my brain and I did my best to ignore him, deciding to ask Chase first instead of assuming things blindly.
Who are you calling peâ
I know Chase is well aware of the bro code, heck, even Todd has his book called 'never let a girl'.
I hope Ellie's okay, I thought. A frown marring my features, I wanted to go up there and comfort her but it seems she doesn't want that to come from me.
After a few minutes, Chase entered the room and without thinking straight, stood up and punched him in the face.
Chase didn't even staggered and gave me a 'wtf' look."The fuck you were dreaming about that got your panties in a twist?" Chase grumbled, holding the area where I hit him.
"Why were you hugging Ellie?" I grumbled, crossing my arms across my chest.
I was taller than Chase but that didn't seem to intimidate him and that's something I like about him, he doesn't cower away like others do because of it.
Chase sighed."You fucking idiot, how many times do I have to tell you to stop letting your jealousy get to you," He scolded, throwing me a glare.
I threw my hands up."It's not like I can stop it, my hand move in its own accordance." I protested, lowering my voice down.
Chase rolled his eyes, massaging his jaw."Yeah, like the time where you punched Todd because your hand moved in its own accord too when in truth you were jealous." He reminded me, making me scowl.
"I wasn't jealous," I snapped, making him snort.
He nodded."Yeah and what did you say after that session? Oh yes, keep a safe distance with her Todd." He mimicked my voice, making my growl at him.
My shoulders slump, knowing that it was true."Fine, I was but in my defense, he didn't move away from her when I threw laser eyes at him." I defended, letting out a huff.
"Not everyone is out to get your girl Alec and you know I only see her like a little sister. I just couldn't help it when I heard her crying, you know that shit's my weakness." Chase explained, my jealousy from earlier slipping away.
I heaved a sigh, well aware of what he meant by that. Behind his tough facade, Chase had a golden heart and weaknesses for damsels in distress.
"I'm sorry man, you know I love you right?" I clasped a hand on his shoulder, patting him with it.
The look Chase threw me was enough to crack a smile on my face."I love you too you jealous cookie monster. Ellie cares for you and she ain't letting go of you that easily." He assured me, his voice humored.
I nodded softly, completely finding it ridiculous now how I got jealous. What the hell is stuck in my ass that I let my thoughts get the best of me?
Its probably whip cream, the demon fucker piped in.
"Thanks coglione, go ahead and do it." I nodded at him, bracing myself for the impact.
(Coglione: Fucker)
At my words, Chase finally let a smile slip on his lips before he threw his arm back and punched me the exact spot where I hit him.
I let out a hiss, making him chuckle."Apology accepted," He said, his eyes brimming with amusement.
I waved my hand off at him."Yes, now lets go back to sleep and stop fucking hogging the damn blankets." I said, plopping back to the air bed.
There's a rule in our group where if one of us gets into a misunderstanding, the person who's at fault can get punch by the guy he'd fought with.
Jayden came up with that idea when Chase threw a punch at Valentino assuming that he was the one who ate his gummy bears without giving V a chance to explain.
I felt a smile grace my lips at the memory, feeling Chase throw half of the blankets at my body and turned away from me.
A few minutes pass before I was met with the annoying snores of Chase before I finally let the fatigue pull me into dreamland.
That night, I dreamed of Ellie and me at the beach watching the starsâ the best part of it was the simple ring placed on one of her fingers.