Chapter 258: Chapter 247: Their Resolve

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The “Sea of Broken Dreams” fit this place really well; drinking its water to satiate my thirst only made me hallucinate, dreaming while being awake.

People I cared for and loved appeared one after another, telling me to give up, that this effort and suffering was just not worth the hassle.

“Anna, you don’t need to work so hard. I will protect you and make sure that you never need anything…”

“B-Brother…?”

My vision became foggy as I started to hear the voice of my brother now.

He appeared amidst the fog, his generous eyes looking at me with pity.

“You don’t need to do this; I have not been working so hard to protect you for you to push yourself so much. Please don’t make my suffering and efforts in vain; I work hard for you, so you can have a better life.”

“But… I don’t want to be a burden.”

“You’re not a burden; you’re my only family. You don’t need to do this; please, Anna, come back home!”

Jack started chasing me across the ocean as I kept swimming away from him.

“Come back home, Anna! Please! You don’t need to suffer; you only need to feel safe and happy! The ugly world outside, I’ll shield you from it with my life! You don’t need to force yourself!”

“No…” I started crying. “T-That’s why I won’t give up… Because I don’t want you to sacrifice your own life for me; I don’t want you to ruin yourself for my sake!”

“Anna…”

“I know you’re just a hallucination, but I just have to tell you the truth! I don’t want you to devolve into a monster; I don’t want you to become what I saw at the end of the story… The former Jack was nowhere to be found; you only became a husk of your former self!” I kept swimming, faster and faster. “I want to help you, to ease the burden! We will do this together as siblings! I don’t need your protection!”

“I see…”

Jack, however, didn’t protest back.

He stopped chasing me, only glancing at me from afar.

“Thank you…”

He slowly dissipated as the fog became clearer and slowly disappeared too.

“Hahh… I’m not doing this for myself… I’m doing this for others…”

Remember that.

Don’t forget it!

Your intentions are not for yourself.

If you were as selfish, wouldn’t you be happy to be protected and pampered by your brother?

The opposite of Desire…

The purple-colored aura surrounding my body slowly began to change; from purple, it changed to clear pink with small sparkles of gold.

“This is…?”

My Health and Ki began to restore naturally, without the need to drain it from anybody.

The more energy I used, the faster my recovery rate became.

This is…

Selflessness.

To forbid one’s desires and interests, and to give everything away for others.

To work hard for others and to help those in need.

I want to help my world, and even this world too.

I don’t want to see people crying or sad anymore; I’m so tired of that.

I want to help everyone. Even that stupid crow-faced idiot.

“I think I’m getting there, eventually. I’ll make it.”

The red aura of Frustration slowly started to change as well.

From red, it slowly became orange-colored.

I feel satisfied with what I have.

I’ve reached so far already, and I can even keep moving forward no matter what.

Isn’t that enough?

I don’t need to rush things; I don’t need to feel frustrated because I can’t reach something.

I need to accept myself for who I am and for what I’ve reached.

This is the opposite of Frustration.

Satisfaction.

The burning, painful erupting power of Frustration suddenly lessened, and it became a soothing, cold wind that flowed through my body.

Which also felt like a comforting warmth, like the hug of my brother.

“No matter what, I will reach my destination.”

I kept swimming, without end, without giving up, without losing sight of my goals.

Eventually, after hours and hours of swimming, fighting monsters, and looking into the horizon.

As three days and three nights passed.

“I… did it.”

I walked through the beach in front of me, made of glittering golden sand.

In front of me was a single treasure.

A pink-colored pearl, resting inside an opened clam.

“This is…?”

I recalled his words, the Heavenly Demon’s words.

“Once you finally reach your destination, you’ll know because there is only a single treasure there. Once you find it, eat it.”

The pink pearl was the single and only treasure of this island.

I put it in my mouth and swallowed it.

A dream-like fog surged from my body as I absorbed the pearl’s powers; the water of the sea that soaked my entire body was slowly absorbed.

“W-What’s this now?”

It wasn’t painful at all like the tempering from before; no, in fact, it felt good.

It was like I was slowly washing away all impurities, becoming a better version of myself.

The impurities surged like dark fog, which slowly dissipated.

At the same time, the pink fog was slowly absorbed completely.

I felt my muscles strengthen considerably as the materials I absorbed all became one with them.

“Is this another… Ugh…”

Yet once more, I couldn’t keep myself awake and ended quickly falling unconscious.

But these sands were warm and cozy.

I really needed a nap.

.

.

.

Ying Shen gasped for air as he looked at his surroundings.

He was inside a dark, damp cave, barely illuminated by the glowing mushrooms growing in the walls.

Inside of this cave, he was alone by himself, wielding his two dagger weapons.

And nothing else; he was completely stark naked.

“Hahh… Hahh…”

He was extremely tired, because despite being “alone” here, he had not stopped fighting for the three days he has been sealed inside.

The only door that led outside had been sealed shut the moment he stepped inside, and he has been fighting without end.

But who was he fighting if there wasn’t even a living being here?

“You’re so useless.”

“Why can’t you fight like a man?”

“And you call yourself an assassin of the Shen Family?”

Shadows.

Beings made of Ying Shen’s own fears appeared around him, surrounding him, insulting him, and…

BAAAM!

Attacking him.

“Argh… Dammit, for how long… For how long I have to fight all of you?!”

Ying Shen barely evaded the powerful kick from a shadow that was his identical copy.

Although he thought he was able to evade that blow, two more shadows appeared from his left and right as he moved while in midair.

CLASH!

BAAM!

A kick into his chin and a punch into his stomach.

He felt his bones crack as he gritted his mandibles and quickly spun in midair, his sharp daggers cutting through the shadows and making them all disappear.

SLAAASH!

He quickly kicked the other that had attempted to hit him before, making it disappear as well.

Yet four more shadows appeared instantly, occupying their places.

“You’ve got to be kidding me…”

Ying Shen recalled what the Heavenly Demon had told him before he dared to enter this place.

“This is the Cave of One Hundred Regretful Shadows,” the Heavenly Demon said. “Once inside, you will face endless shadows that will represent your greatest fears. Only by killing them and absorbing their power will you regain some stamina. You must keep fighting them without end, polishing your senses and abilities, until you can finally face your fears completely.”

“S-Such a place existed?”

“It does; this world is full of such fantastical places, Ying Shen,” the Heavenly Demon laughed. “However, I recommend you not to step in. You’re a coward and lack both courage and resolve. Unlike my disciple, you’re ill-suited for this trial; you’ll most likely die. Are you sure you want to go inside? You may never see your family ever again.”

“T-That’s…”

Back then, Ying Shen gripped his fists tightly.

He felt an overwhelming amount of fear!

He didn’t want to go in at all.

In fact, he just wanted to run away right now.

However, after recalling how fiercely Anna always fought and how she always pushed herself to her limits.

“I trust you, Ying Shen! I’ve got a knack for it!”

“You’ve got talent, you have to just develop it~!”

“Come on, we can do this!”

Her words resonated within his mind, and Ying Shen couldn’t help but smile.

Anna was perhaps the first person through the young fox boy’s entire life that had ever believed in him.

Not even his family truly believed in him on the same sincere and honest level as she did.

She was someone of pure heart, someone that truly captivated him, a true friend.

He didn’t want to disappoint her; he wanted to strive forward, even as afraid as he was of everything.

“For Anna,” he muttered. “Anna would probably scream at you for saying that, and she would say she believes in me, isn’t it?”

“Hmph… Well, knowing her… Yes, she would,” nodded the Heavenly Demon. “You’re doing this for her, not yourself?”

“I have no trust in myself; in fact, I kind of hate myself…” Ying Shen sighed. “My whole life I’ve been given a task; my entire life I’ve trained for that task, to kill you, yet such a feat seems utterly impossible, and it's nothing but a stupid ritual from the past, which my family is so obsessed with. I’ve lived my whole life confused, and I still am. But… Anna trusts me, and I don’t want to betray that trust.”

“Hah… Then go inside and die,” the Heavenly Demon walked away without saying another word.

Ying Shen gritted his teeth as he stepped forward.

And fast forward to three days later; he was still stuck inside.

He had been fighting the shadows and absorbing their power, and the more he did, the more his heart felt calmer.

It was still taking him a very long time, and over time, he was growing weary.n/ô/vel/b//in dot c//om

“This only means my fears are so big, it’ll take me many days to even overcome them,” he laughed to himself. “I’m so pathetic…”

“Yes, you indeed are.”

“Why even try? Just give up and die.”

“You disappointment…”

“Useless bastard! If you’re not going to do the ritual, then why did your family even raise you?!”

“You deserve death!”

“Kill yourself! Grab that knife and slit your throat this very instant!”

Ying Shen kept hearing his own voice berating him and screaming at him all kinds of swearing words. These were all his fears, his own insecurities, his own lack of self-confidence, his own self-loathing…

Yet slowly, he started to smile.

“I don’t care anymore what you say… I don’t care anymore about my fears; I don’t care about any of that anymore!” he roared. “Someone finally believes in me. Someone amazing like Anna who wants to save the world! Do you think I’m going to give up?! No… I will stay by her side, and I will become her support, even as I bleed, even as I cry, because she… She’s someone that one day will become even greater than the Heavenly Demon and reach even higher than the Nine Heavens!”

The core of Ying Shen’s new resolve was…

Admiration!

After seeing Anna struggle and overcome countless trials, he couldn’t help but feel immense admiration towards her!

He wanted to follow her, to serve her, and to help her accomplish her dreams!

There were no romantic feelings involved in this; this was merely immense and incredible admiration.

He felt inspired, and he felt like he could reach anywhere as long as he followed her.

“I will carve a path for my young master, no matter what!”

Ying Shen resolve was set.

He completely threw away any responsibilities.

He didn’t care anymore about the Heavenly Demon assassination.

And he couldn’t care less about his ancestors!

He called Anna his young master, and he would serve her as her shadow.

FLASH!

His body suddenly divided into dozens of shadow clones as they rushed against the other shadows surrounding him.

Over and over again, for many hours, even days!

He didn’t stop fighting, until at long last.

RUMBLE!

The cave’s entrance slowly opened again.

And he walked outside of it, his face having changed completely.

His fearful expression was no longer there, as his eyes were blazing with endless resolve.

“So you’ve found a new purpose…”

The Heavenly Demon greeted him with a smile and a nod.

“I suppose I underestimated you. Well done, Ying Shen. You’ve proven me wrong.”

“…”

Ying Shen, however, ignored the Heavenly Demon, walking away without even looking at him in the eyes.

“You dare not even look at me in the eyes?”

Ying Shen stopped walking for a second.

“I only serve my new young master, and that young master is Anna. My apologies, but I have no time to dedicate to you.”

After hearing his response, the Heavenly Demon’s crimson eyes widened in shock.

Since when he has been so bold?!

Was he really the same Ying Shen as before?

In silence, the Heavenly Demon watched the fox man rush back to the dark palace.

“Hah,” the Heavenly Demon smiled. “Krahahahaha!”

And he laughed out loud!

“This new generation… They’re truly a band of lunatics!” he kept laughing. “Interesting! So very interesting! Maybe the future… won’t be so bad!”

Ying Shen decided to free himself from his own chains; he decided to dedicate himself to becoming stronger for someone who taught him that he was much more than what the traditions forced him to become.

“I should hurry and prepare young master Anna's breakfast.”

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