Chapter 136: Chapter 20

KAIROS

“I’m your son. My mother has been resenting your departure since I was in her womb. You left and it hurt her. She never realized I knew, but I did. She’s unaware of my ability to perceive people’s suppressed thoughts.

“She has an inkling, but I’ve never discussed my abilities with her. That’s how I know why you left. I saw your thoughts. She doesn’t know you were in that much pain. She would have understood if she did.”

His words were a torrent, but only a few stuck with me.

“You’re my child?” I asked again, disregarding everything else he said. I had a son? I had a child with Adelie. She was pregnant when I left. I abandoned my pregnant wife.

“No, I was joking,” he retorted sarcastically.

She was pregnant when I left? Carrying our child. Did she know when I left? She would have told me if she did.

“I am so…so sorry…”

“For what?” He cut me off. “That you left or that you didn’t know about me? She never stopped thinking about it but she knew that you would have stayed if you knew. She didn’t want to burden you. That’s why she was so grateful she didn’t tell you sooner.”

She knew…she knew when I left…

“I had the privilege of growing up with a strong parent. There’s no room for you there.”

“You are my child!” I kept repeating.

“She almost died giving birth. Lost too much blood. Esty saved her. Drew her blood into her. She fell into a coma for a few days. Didn’t even have a chance to hold her newborn. We didn’t think she’d wake up.

“I was born early but I still had the mind of what I have now. I heard Esty’s thoughts when she held me. And for the first time I didn’t hear hers. She was gone before I could see her eyes.

“You weren’t there! If she would have died it would have been of a broken heart because I felt her pain when I grew inside her. I felt every emotion you caused her. And it was all dark.” His words left me breathless.

“She told me it’s my choice if I want to tell you. I didn’t really want to. You are not my father. You haven’t earned the right to be called my father. But she still cares for you. For some stupid reason.”

I buried my face in my hands, looking at him. He looked so much like Adelie. Of course, she was his mother.

She thought I wouldn’t have left if I knew she was pregnant, but she was wrong…at the time it wasn’t a question of what I was leaving, it was a question of whose blood I would see on my hands. And if I knew she was pregnant… I might have ended myself completely, to ensure my messed up mind could never hurt her. If I had known, I would have done even more to protect her from myself.

“I do not blame you,” Elias said. “But she does, she just doesn’t know.”

“I always wanted a kid…”

“Just to be clear. I feel nothing for you. I have a mother. I don’t need a father. You are a stranger to me.” His voice was devoid of any emotion. He really didn’t care.

“Then it’s time for us to get to know one another,” I said.

He quickly got up. “No, thank you,” he said and took off.

“Elias!” I ran after him but Maeve stopped me.

“Why are you chasing a child?” she asked, her face creased with the frown she had been wearing for the past week.

I stepped back and looked at her. She was studying my shocked state. “You knew?” I asked. She stood there, not understanding what I was talking about. “You all knew,” I stated.

How could she not know? She was there. She saw how her stomach grew, how she cried, how she gave birth. When I was supposed to be there…

“What on earth are you talking about?” she asked.

“How could you not tell me? How could you all lie to my face?”

“Kairos, what do you mean?” Her face showed concern.

“Elias is mine,” I said and her face softened with a pitying look.

“There was never a day where I didn’t think you should have known.”

“Then why didn’t you tell me?” I asked. She, out of all the people, was the one who would have found me in a week if she needed to. “Everyone in that pack knew?” Her head slowly nodded. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because Adelie needed us. She didn’t say it, but she did. And I watched how much darker she turned once you left. And I do believe that if Elias wasn’t in the picture, she would have gone completely crazy, would have run away.

“But she didn’t. Because she had a child to care for. And once we all found out. She wasn’t the one who said you were the father. But we all knew. We all watched her but none of the pack wolves questioned. They knew you were a sore subject. And all we did was be there for her.

“She was hurt and was told that she would lose her baby. Once he was born…we figured it was best to never let you know.”

“How could that be best?”

“You would have returned for the child. Not for her. And she would forgive you the minute you arrive and she would die knowing that you did it all because of a child.”

“You know I loved her! Still do!”

“But you didn’t return for her love. Kairos…you may be his father in nature. But…Time has proved so many times that a parent only becomes one by actions. You are not the boy’s father in any other form but nature.”

“I deserve to be a part of his life!”

She bitterly laughed out. “You don’t deserve anything. You have done more damage than good.”

Her eyes glossed over. “It’s about what she deserves. She deserves to be happy. And until now you haven’t shown that you are capable of offering that to each other. You both have lived together like two chemicals that don’t mix.

“You have no right to tell me how wrong I was for not telling you when I did exactly what you left for. I was there and I supported her when you weren’t. And I tried everything for her to be happy. Her child is her happiness. And she will protect him with every inch of her body.”

“As will I!”

“Didn’t she want to tell me? Ever?” I asked. She shook her head. “I have a five-year-old son, Maeve. She knew how much I wanted a child. She was the one who wanted to wait to have one.”

My memories went back to when I got possessed. We had agreed to have a child. She wanted to have someone in case I died. When we were both so sure I would die.

To her, I did.

I tried to pass her. “Don’t go to him,” she said. “Adelie was both his mother and father, it won’t take a day for you to get his trust and respect. He is stubborn. And he won’t easily forgive you for hurting his mom.”

I wouldn’t either. I nodded.

“Hey, Maeve…” She looked up at me. “Don’t make the same mistake I did.”

Her brow furrowed.

“…don’t run from happiness when you are being handed it on a platter. I once ran from my second chance. And you don’t deserve that pain. I know you might think that you are saving him but…”

“Don’t.” She cut me off and walked off.

Two more days passed. The vampires weren’t any good. None of us knew how to find their location. The only option for us was to wait until Death would visit her and he could tell her how we could get there. We were just waiting.

I took out the crystal to see it glimmering. “Adelie…”

She didn’t answer. The light was there but she didn’t speak. Why didn’t she answer me? “Adelie. Are you there?” I asked.

My heart grew worried. And I shouted her name. She was there, the marble gleamed. I ran through the castle. “Where is Esty?” I asked one servant. She just shrugged her shoulders. “Esty!” I shouted.

I ran to where her room was and barged in seeing that she sat by her window. I dropped the marble on her table. “It’s broken,” I told her hurriedly.

She looked at it. “It’s not…”

“It…it must be, she isn’t answering me. She always answers me.”

She lifted herself from her chair. “If it breaks on one side it breaks on the other too. I have used this with my daughter for many years. She is there.”

“She didn’t answer me.”

“She might be dead.”

I exhaled a laugh. “What?”

She just shrugged. “If she dies the marble still gleams.”

I shook my head. “She isn’t dead,” I told her. “I am going there!” I needed to know that she was okay. Even if they kill me. I needed to see that she was okay.

I initiated a gathering. Everyone was already assembled, their eyes fixed on me. “Adelie isn’t responding anymore. I’m going to find her.”

Leonard voiced his concern. “She didn’t return. What if you don’t either?”

Maeve chimed in, “If they don’t get that book, they won’t stop tormenting us.” She paused, her voice faltering. “What if she’s…” The word ‘dead’ hung in the air, unspoken.

I was aware of the grim possibility. “It doesn’t matter. As Esty pointed out, they know Adelie took the book. It must be here somewhere. They want that book. I’ll learn from her mistake and avoid touching anything. Moreover, I’ll kill the first person I encounter.”

Leonard rose to his feet, “Kairos—”

I cut him off. “If they killed her, I won’t hesitate to kill a few of them. My soul is already stained.”

“But there are more than just a few,” he countered.

“I know. And I’m aware I might not come back. That’s probably what will happen.”

Elias crawled out from a corner. “If Mom wanted to negotiate, she would have handed over the book by now.”

“We’re not giving them the book, but a replica,” I clarified.

Maeve ordered Elias, “Go to your room.”

“No, he stays!” I insisted, and she backed down.

I turned my attention back to the king, who seemed resigned to my plan. “It will take a few days,” Leonard informed me.

“Tell them to hurry.” I looked at Maeve. “Do we know where the real one is?” She shook her head in response.

Collin cleared his throat. “I saw her,” he confessed, his gaze fixed on the table’s center. “The night she left, she was doing something in the pack’s center. I didn’t see much, but she had a book. Once she left, it was gone. She thought she was alone.”

Leonard beamed at Collin. “That’s why he’s the best beta. He notices everything.” He was right. Collin was as observant as a hawk.

But Collin didn’t react to the praise. He’d been distant all week. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that he and Maeve were dealing with something.

“She wouldn’t make it easy for us. She would have hidden it deep. She would ensure we can’t find it,” I speculated.

“Are you sure?” Leonard questioned.

I nodded. “She didn’t want us to follow her. She wouldn’t have buried it even six feet deep. If it’s there, it’s not easily accessible. But it doesn’t matter. We don’t need it anyway. But now you all know which part to protect from newcomers.” Maeve nodded in agreement.

“Kairos…” Maeve began. “You shouldn’t go there,” she advised. “I don’t mean to sound rude, but among us, I am the most powerful. I should go.”

“Absolutely not!” I retorted immediately.

“You have a son to look after!” She argued back.

Collin gasped. “You have a son?” Leonard remained unfazed. So he knew.

I pointed at Elias, confirming Collin’s question.

Maeve approached me. “Kairos, I owe it to you. I made a vow to protect you, to be there.”

Collin stormed toward us. “What kind of vow makes you want to die for him?” he demanded.

I felt it was unfair to keep Collin in the dark. “She was part of a mission that unleashed a demonic creature which possessed me. She knew about it and lived in my pack, serving me, doing everything she could in my supposed last years.” Collin looked more confused than before.

“But you never owed me anything. Not then, not now. And you said you are the most powerful here. You can’t go. The pack needs you. And Elias…” I glanced at him. “He knows you more than he knows me.”

“I will take that crystal from Esty. I will inform you of everything I know. If needed, you will send another to bring them down. Right now, it will be me. And if I don’t return, it will be my price to pay. Not anyone else’s.” I took Maeve’s hands in mine.

“You have so much strength in you, Maeve. But please use it wisely. You can’t do well if you are dead.”

I glanced at Leonard. “Make sure the book is ready as soon as possible.”

I went up to Esty’s room. “I need your help,” I told her.

She was still sitting by the window table, unmoved. She looked at me as I sat across from her. “I will go there myself. With a replica. I need another crystal to communicate with someone. And some kind of spells to make me appear powerful. Just long enough for them to believe that I used that book.”

A small smile played on her lips. “You’re going to fool them again?” she asked. “Even if you die, it might be amusing that they fell for it twice. When are you leaving?”

“As soon as the replica is ready.”

She looked out the window. “Why is Elias digging?” I leaned over to see the pack’s center.

I sighed. “He’s a very stubborn child. He just heard that the book is there under Adelie’s power. We agreed that it should stay there. He doesn’t listen, does he?”

“Like father, like son,” she mumbled.

I looked at her. “So you know,” I wasn’t surprised.

“How could I not? I was there when you left. And not even nine months later, he came. She had no other man after you, or during you.”

Who wouldn’t want to be with a woman like that? She was beautiful, smart, and kind.

“Why didn’t she find anyone?”

“She’s a nymph. Nymphs don’t need lovers. But she needs you,” she continued, her gaze fixed on me.

I shook my head. “She doesn’t.”

She looked up at the ceiling, deep in thought. “Okay. She doesn’t.” I chuckled at her response.

“But unfortunately, she wants you. And I have no idea who you’re trying to save by staying here. She will never love anyone else, and you are the one keeping her from love. I know you love her.”

“I’m afraid to sacrifice her.” The words slipped out before I could stop them.

She smiled gently. “Fool. Life for her will never be easy. With powers like hers, she is bound to walk into danger. To die young, maybe, hopefully not. But it’s more likely. But you can either choose to suffer separately or be together while you can. And make some moments count.”

Esty stood up. “I suggest you give in now and regret only five years wasted than dying on your deathbed doing nothing for your love.”

She walked to the door. “Where are you going?” I asked.

“To the pharmacy to steal props for my spell.”

“King is aware!” I called out, and her eyes widened. Because most of the time, these things were handled in secret.

I took the opportunity to go out to where Elias was digging. “We agreed to keep it there,” I told him, looking at the small pile of dirt next to him.

“What are you talking about? I’m just playing. There’s no sand to build castles with, so I use dirt,” he said, his face serious.

I knelt down next to the small hole in the ground. “I know you’re smart, but I’m not that dumb.”

“Why are you trying to get it?” I asked.

“I want to see what’s in it. If it’s as powerful as they say, then it should have something to make someone powerful enough to take over him. If mom hid it, then it has something valuable.”

“Where did you hear what that book does?” I asked.

He stopped digging, looked at me but didn’t answer.

“You were hiding somewhere and heard it, right?” I asked the cheeky boy. “All right, you have your idea, but it won’t be fast enough. I need to go there as soon as possible.”

“You will go and die. While I will keep digging it and finding it.”

Did that child have any heart in him to say it so easily? “Your mom wouldn’t like this. She hid it for a reason.”

“Well, she’s not here right now, is she?” he retorted.

I ran my hands over my face. “I have a very annoying kid.”

“Maybe it’s just your manhood being threatened by my wisdom?”

“I know more than you,” I argued and threw him a worm that he had in his dirt pile.

He quickly dodged it with his palm. “You have experienced more, but you don’t know more.”

“What does Adelie do when you talk back?” I asked.

“She has given up fighting with me and agrees to shut me up.”

“Makes sense.”

“She’s a good mother. I’m just a difficult child,” he admitted and continued digging. But after some time, he got tired and went back inside, probably plotting a different plan.

I spent the entire day trying to reach Adelie, but she didn’t pick up. Instead, I found myself spending time with Esty, watching her craft her spells and listening to her explain their functions. “Adelie didn’t need these because she’s strong, but you need all the help you can get,” she said, her words as blunt as ever.

She picked up a vial filled with orange powder. “This one’s a healer. Sprinkle it on your wounds.” She then picked up another bottle. “This one will make smoke appear to come from you. It won’t actually do anything, but it’ll make them think you’re up to something.”

She showed me a few more potions. One for an adrenaline boost. One deadly poison. One to turn my skin a porcelain white. She had created a lot of them just for the visual effect. Hopefully, it would make me seem more than just a werewolf. Then, she placed two marbles in front of her. “Give one to Maeve. I don’t want to talk to you,” she said.

“Why aren’t you worried about her?” she asked, catching me off guard.

I must have appeared calm. “She’ll be okay,” I said with confidence. “Somehow.”

I had a feeling I would know if she was dead. Otherwise, how could I be so calm? As evening fell, I looked out of her room window.

We both stared at the few lanterns outside. “Never thought I’d be spending my evenings with you,” Esty said, a hint of amusement in her voice. I never thought I’d be this close to her and feel at peace.

“Why did you do it?” I asked.

She looked at me, confused. “Raphael,” I clarified.

“Took you long enough to ask,” she said, a regretful smile on her face. “I needed to make a statement. I wanted Adelie to understand that there was no other choice. I never meant to kill him. I didn’t even know he would be there, so angry. If he hadn’t tried to trap me, I would have just left. It was an unfortunate break-in on my part. I did it, but I didn’t mean to. It was a mistake.”

“Do you feel guilty?” I asked.

She shook her head. “I don’t.”

“Why not?”

She shrugged. “I didn’t know him. He was in my way.”

“He didn’t deserve it.”

I turned to look at her. She was smiling calmly. “We don’t always get what we deserve. I won’t apologize for what I did. At the time, I thought it was the right thing to do. I did it for my own reasons. I won’t apologize for my past, but I will try to improve my future. And you can stay there and hate me all you want. I don’t need your friendship.”

“Thank you,” I said, gathering all the potions and standing up.

“It was nothing. Just simple witchcraft.”

“Thank you for being there for Adelie. For saving her.”

She smirked. “Is that forgiveness?” she asked.

I turned to her just before leaving. “It’s a thank you for not letting her die.”

“How many times do I have to save her before you forgive me?” she asked, not really caring about my forgiveness.

I shrugged, pretending to consider her question. “I don’t know. How many times does it take for it to become suspiciously convenient for you that she keeps getting into danger?”

She shrugged. “Five.”

“Ask me then,” I told her, leaving to the sound of her laughter.

MAEVE

It was late, two in the morning. I was sitting on my bed, looking out the window. My knees were pulled up to my chest, my bare legs cold from the draft. My thin sweater didn’t provide much warmth.

Collin hadn’t spoken to me in a week. He barely even looked at me. We only exchanged a few words, and they were all about Adelie.

He seemed different. Not like he used to be. Was he sad? Or maybe he was angry that he had to see me at all. I told him I didn’t want anything to do with him. And he respected that.

I didn’t have much time to love my mate. I didn’t think I could feel anything for another man. But I could…and it scared me. A million different scenarios ran through my mind. What if we got bored of each other? I didn’t want a meaningless fling. What if he died before I did? What if it was worse than that? What if it was wonderful for the rest of our lives?

It hurt. My heart ached from the loneliness, even though there was someone out there for me. I did this to myself. I was the one causing my own pain.

I should have been thinking about Adelie, but my mind was consumed by him. Maybe he had put a spell on me. It felt like it.

I hadn’t known him for long, but his absence hurt like nothing else.

I was just sitting on my bed, hurting over something I never had. I would leave, and it would still hurt.

I didn’t understand. When did I become so afraid of pain? I was hurting over nothing. I could be hurting over something worth the pain.

I swung my feet out of bed. Maybe pain was what I needed. Maybe I needed something to hurt over.

My bare feet carried me through the corridors to Collin’s room. Light peeked out from under the door. He was awake.

I didn’t knock. I just slowly turned the doorknob and walked in. Only a single table lamp was lit.

He was out on the balcony, shirtless, his pants hanging loosely on his waist. I wasn’t dressed much better. My thin black sweater clung to my braless top like a second skin, and my shorts left my legs bare.

He had set up a telescope, twice his size, along with binoculars and other instruments. An open book lay on the table, filled with drawings of star constellations in black ink.

I slowly approached him, my gaze falling on his back. I watched his muscles flex as he moved. He looked through the telescope, then made some drawings with his pen. This time, it was a planet.

He looked through the telescope again. “Come see this,” he said, stepping aside.

Was he talking to me? He looked back at me, his eyes roaming over my scantily clad body. As if he had any right to judge, standing there shirtless.

He quickly averted his eyes from my top half, which had definitely caught his attention, but he didn’t look embarrassed. “Come,” he said, and I slowly walked up to his telescope.

I peered through the small hole. “What do you see?” he asked.

“A bright ball,” I told him. That was all it was.

“It’s Venus. The second planet from the sun. The only one named after a female god. The ancient Roman goddess of love and beauty.”

He scribbled something down. I looked over to see him coloring in his planet. My hands were still on the telescope. “It’s just a ball,” I told him.

He smiled down at his drawing. “Not everything is as it seems. You might see a simple ball, but I see divine femininity. Delicate movement. Romance. Passion and lust.”

“Maybe you should marry her. She sounds like every man’s dream.”

“Every woman is a Venus.” He finished coloring in, then looked up at the stars. “You know…when they say that a man is the head of the house… I think I know where it came from. Because a woman is the heart of the family. Someone who keeps everything together, at peace. Without her, there would be no family. She is Venus.”

He moved closer, taking hold of the telescope. I quickly pulled my hands back to avoid touching him. He looked through the telescope again. “Beautiful,” he said, pulling back. “But never completely visible. Too bright for our eyes. Too passionate for our hearts.”

He looked at me as he spoke his last sentence. “Go to sleep, Maeve,” he said, smiling sweetly. I felt a hitch in my breath at his words.

He closed his book and walked into his room, leaving me alone under the stars. I walked up to the railing and looked up. The sky was filled with a million little lights.

“It must be exhausting for Venus to carry around so much love,” I said, resting my elbows on the railing and gazing up at the sky. “To feel so much that’s out of her control. To be thrown into the horrible fight for love.”

“Is that what she thinks?” he asked from afar. “That it’s horrible to feel?” His voice was quiet but close.

“It’s painful.”

“It’s rewarding.”

I let out a laugh. “Love is pain,” I said, turning around. I flinched when I saw how close he was. The back of my waist pressed against the railing. He didn’t stop.

He rested both of his hands on the railing, trapping me between them and leaning down. My heart raced at his smirk. “It wouldn’t be beautiful if sacrifices weren’t made.”

“Did Venus ever suffer for her love?”

“You tell me? Are you suffering?”

“Agony,” I admitted.

He reached up to touch my jaw, his thumb slowly sliding over my lower lip. “Why did you come here?” he asked.

“I wanted to feel pain.”

His gaze darkened, fixated on my lips. He drew me closer, his body heat radiating against mine. I braced myself for the feel of his lips on mine. But they never made contact. Instead, I felt the soft brush of his nose against my cheek. He was so close. His lips were tantalizingly near, a mere half-inch away. I tried to bridge the gap, but he teasingly pulled back.

His lips curled into a smirk. “Does that sting?” he queried.

He repeated the action, pulling away each time I tried to close the distance. “Collin…”

“You asked for pain,” he said, a chuckle lacing his words. “Leaving now would cause the most pain.”

“I want the pain to come later, when I think of you. I want to feel it tomorrow, regretting that I ever came here. When I go back to my pack. That’s when I want to feel the pain. As intensely as possible. I want to be kept awake by thoughts of you. I want to spend months crying over what might have been.”

I placed my hands on his warm chest. “Hurt me, Collin.”

“All right, Venus.”