Chapter 77: Chapter 77

Adelie

His touch was a warm caress on my upper thigh, firm and comforting. I’d been waiting for this moment, and finally, his lips traced a path down my leg, like a gentle stream of the softest water you could imagine.

It was a sensation that seemed to float over my skin, tender and soothing. He paused at my feet, positioning himself between my legs. His hands, rough and strong, gripped my thighs and pulled me towards him, crashing me into him.

He leaned in, his weight pressing against my lower abdomen as my legs wrapped around him, pulling him closer. His lips journeyed from the center of my rib cage upwards.

Only after he’d savored the crook of my neck did he lift his face to meet mine. But just as he leaned in for a kiss, I held his head back.

The face that met mine was unfamiliar. I didn’t recognize the man who was looking down at me. I’d never seen him before.

Confusion washed over me, and then suddenly, I was falling.

I woke with a start, the early morning sun streaming in through the window. For the past week, my sleep had been plagued by nightmares.

Sleep was elusive, and when it did come, it was filled with dreams that left me feeling as if I hadn’t slept at all.

One week. It had been one week since Madeline was gone. One week since I lost my werewolf. One week since I lost my sense of self and purpose.

I’d always believed that my werewolf side was insignificant, that it didn’t play as big a role in my life as my nymph side, or even my death angel side.

I couldn’t shift, and my wolf senses were limited. I only had my wolf soul. I thought I had so little. But it was only after I lost it that I realized its importance, how much I truly had.

Now, I felt incomplete. Something was missing. There was a void, and a million little things made me feel less, both emotionally and physically.

My entire being felt as if it had been transported to a different universe, a different time. I didn’t know where I was. It was hard to remember how I’d lived before.

And then there was Kairos. My husband. He was just my husband now. We were mates first, and then all the other labels followed. When asked, we were each other’s mates.

And we felt it when we said that. But now, we were just husband and wife.

In the human world, when you choose to marry someone, you’re not certain that person will love you forever. You rely on the emotions of the moment.

You carry on with that until you die, in the best-case scenario. Or you discover that your other half wasn’t your half at all, but only pretended to love you.

Kairos was already downstairs, probably waiting for me at the breakfast table with a cup of coffee.

Why did I feel worse when he was in the room with me than when I was alone? When he was near, all I felt was another pair of eyes on me.

We’d done so much together; we were so much together. But now, it was all gone. He was a mate I used to have, a mate I would never have again, and for now, he was just my husband.

I felt awful when I was with him. I felt guilty. I was distant because I didn’t know how to react or what to say.

For the past week, we’d followed the same routine. I woke up alone in our bed, went to breakfast, and said little.

After that, we went about our separate lives. Then we went to bed and slept. We hadn’t even kissed since then. We hadn’t even touched since then…

I made my way downstairs. All the windows were already open.

It was a beautiful day; the sun was shining and birds were singing, but somehow it didn’t feel so wonderful when my eyes met the dim dining hall.

It was empty. There wasn’t even any food. I looked around and Helen approached.

“Good morning, Luna Adelie, Alpha asks you to join him for breakfast on the terrace.” I nodded at her with a quick smile.

A silver lining appeared as I stepped onto the terrace, approaching our petite, white table. Kairos, clad entirely in black, was reclining in his chair, eyes shut and face angled towards the sky.

“Morning,” I greeted him. He stirred, straightening up in his seat.

“Morning,” he echoed back. Our gazes briefly locked before we both quickly averted our eyes.

It wasn’t until I took my seat that I noticed the table’s true size. At our regular breakfast spot, we sat side by side, maintaining a comfortable distance.

Now, we were seemingly seated across from each other, but it felt too close. So close that he might pick up on my uneven breaths and the pounding of my heart.

I didn’t know where to direct my gaze. My eyes darted everywhere, avoiding Kairos.

A week had passed without any physical contact. Even in bed, we maintained a gap wide enough for two more bodies. Not a single word about our dissolved mate bond.

We acted as if everything was normal, but I couldn’t meet his eyes, guilt gnawing at me for not feeling the same way about him anymore.

“Heading to training?” Kairos inquired. I’d been skipping it, avoiding leaving the house altogether.

“Haven’t decided yet,” I replied, offering him a weak smile before returning my focus to my tea.

“I might head to the forest. It’s been a while.” I admitted, feeling my strength waning.

He nodded, beginning his breakfast while I left my food untouched. His proximity was overwhelming. I never imagined feeling so alienated from Kairos, who once felt so familiar.

“When will you return to training?” he asked, finishing his scrambled eggs.

Kairos seemed to have no issue looking at me. It felt like he was constantly observing me. Only when our eyes met briefly did he look away.

I pondered over what was keeping me from training.

Admitting it out loud was daunting. I took a deep breath, exhaling slowly.

“People stare,” I confessed. “They won’t stop staring at me. That’s why I left the one time I tried to return. Their stares are unsettling.”

I could feel my cheeks warming. “I can’t be there if they’re going to pity me.”

“Do you want me to address it?” Kairos offered.

I felt feeble admitting my fears. I was supposed to be their Luna, yet I was hiding.

“That would be helpful,” I admitted. It had been a while since I’d asked anything of him. Was this the beginning of moving forward?

“I’ll inform them, but only return when you’re ready,” he assured me, standing up.

“Can I bring someone with me to the forest? Nathan or Maeve, if they’re not needed?” I asked, feeling insecure without my wolf.

I couldn’t go alone, and going with Kairos would be even worse.

“You’re the Luna.” He said it to reassure me, but it didn’t. Delilah had taunted me, saying I couldn’t be a true Luna without a wolf form.

And now, I didn’t even have a wolf soul.

After Kairos left, I remained seated, my hands clutching my now-cold cup.

Kairos

I made my way to the training grounds alone. For a week. A damned long week.

I was unsure of my own feelings. Kye had been unusually quiet, barely speaking to me. He’d made it clear he wasn’t angry, just grieving.

I hadn’t had a peaceful night’s sleep in a while. I used to sleep soundly with my mate by my side. Now… it was anything but restful.

I knew we’d eventually have to confront this, but I didn’t know how to approach her. How would I initiate this conversation?

What could I possibly utter? What words could I form that she wasn’t already aware of? I couldn’t bear to gaze into her eyes and spew falsehoods. My emotions had shifted.

I knew her inside and out, yet she felt like a stranger. She had never seemed so mundane to me. She had never felt so much like just another member of the pack.

I knew there was a remnant of something. Love was still there, but it had morphed into something else.

I kept repeating to myself that she was my mate, but it felt like I was trying to convince myself.

Even though I knew she wasn’t my mate, I still yearned for her presence. It was a complex situation. If she ever left, I would still lose my sanity…or so I believed.

As werewolves mature, the first lesson our parents impart is about our mates, because that is the purest and most beautiful knowledge we can acquire in our youth.

When my mate Mia passed away, I was utterly broken. I didn’t know how I would carry on, because I lacked the strength to keep fighting.

And now I’d lost my mate in our bond. I felt hollow. She was absent.

I didn’t know how to love in this manner…

I didn’t linger on the training grounds, nor did I wait for everyone to assemble. I trusted that word would reach everyone, even Archibald’s pack.

My Alpha voice commanded their attention. “Night Walkers pack and Silver Moon pack!” They all ceased their activities and focused on me.

“I’m aware that you’ve noticed shifts in this pack, shifts that are affecting all of us. If you have any queries, come to me first. Ask me anything you want.

“If you wish, I’ll answer more personal questions about this matter.” I was certain they knew what I was referring to.

“And all I request is for you to understand our Luna Adelie. I’d ask you to either keep your curiosity to yourself or direct it at me. Please refrain from bothering her at this time.”

I didn’t typically plead with my pack for anything, but I needed to do this for Adelie.

“Thank you,” I concluded, making my way to my Beta, Nathan.

“How’s it going?” I inquired.

He didn’t immediately grasp what I was asking him but he attempted to respond.

“Well, the pack is functioning smoothly. Our men are returning with necessities. Vampires are seldom here, but they’re adhering to the rules when they are.”

He had overlooked something. “What about Maeve?” I asked. He furrowed his brows. I rolled my eyes.

“Ensure her blood bags arrive today. She’s still adapting to vampire habits. We are merely tormenting her if we fail to provide her with the blood. Leave training a bit early to handle it.”

I turned around, only to see Fala approaching me.

“Brother, good morning!” she greeted with a wide grin.

“Fala, what can I do for you?” I asked.

“When is Adelie returning?” She asked the same damn question every time. I despised discussing things I was uncertain of.

I scanned my surroundings to ensure no one was within earshot. “Fala, you don’t even like Adelie,” I pointed out as she lowered her gaze to the ground.

“It’s not that I dislike her. We just…aren’t friends,” she admitted.

“I’m just concerned about you two. I used to always see you together. But now when I visit your house, Adelie is alone in her room.”

She went on, “And you’re always in a foul mood. I just don’t want you two to drift apart.”

We were ~already~ apart. “Drop it,” I retorted, walking away from her until she called out to me.

“I saw Esty,” she revealed, and I stormed back to her.

“Where? Hasn’t she done enough? What does she want?” I demanded.

“I saw her in the forest and we spoke.”

Was Fala mocking me?

“You actually spoke to her?” I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm. “How very thoughtful of you, dear sister. I trust you two had a delightful conversation.” I didn’t bother to mask the bitterness in my tone.

Fala didn’t seem fazed by my disappointment, but there was a hint of concern in her eyes. “What is it?” I prodded, sensing she had more to share. Might as well get it all out in the open now.

Despite my snarky demeanor, she responded. “She had a message for you. She claims she can restore your mate bond.”