Chapter 121

“…Nothing will happen.”

“Yes. Nothing will happen. Seria.”

“Lesche.”

Tears began to fall from Seria’s eyes. She wiped her eyes with both hands.

“Can I sleep again? When I come back this time….”

Her eyes, clear as always, looked at Lesche as if she could see right through him.

“I’ll tell you everything when I get back.”

****

*Seria’s POV*

***

When I woke up, I was in my room.

Of course, it wasn’t easy to get back to the dream this time. I tried to hold the circlet over the Stern insignia that Abigail had brought, but to no avail. I wanted to head for the mine right then, but I had been unconscious for a week.

After two days of taking medicine and rushing to replenish my nutrition, I finally made it to the mine. As soon as I arrived, I tried to do the same thing I did the last time in front of the altar, but to no avail. All I got was an outpouring of sacred power. I couldn’t see Tuban.

“…I think what I saw was actually an illusion.”

I said as I touched the circlet on my neck. The red jewel encrusted in the center of the circlet was uncharacteristically dented. This was something that was easily noticeable. I had been using the circlet as a tool to torture Mies.

I pressed the gem hard just to be sure, and just like that I was able to enter the space of Tuban.

‘I don’t think I should stay here long.’

The last two days.

Lesche hasn’t really asked me anything. He had bared his heart to me, and so this time when I return, I want to respond to him by telling him everything.

Considering all that, is it good to have something sacred to tell him that this place is not in the book?

I’ve always wondered how I could say that this place is in a book to a man who has lived with the duty of defending the largest empire on this continent, and the most dangerous central lake.

“Tuban.”

Tuban was still suspended like a mummy. No matter how little movement he was born with, if he was still alive he would have to move slightly, but he didn’t. He was just dead. Of course, it was the same when I first met him.

“…You didn’t die during that time, did you? I can’t talk for a long time. I’m here to ask you some questions.”

I asked the questions I’d managed to piece together in my head. But I couldn’t ask complicated questions because the speed Tuban was writing was not fast.

“If this isn’t inside the book, did I turn back time? Am I the one who turned back time?” (Seria)

“Yes.” (The writing)

I exhaled. I can’t believe I turned back time. I don’t have a single memory of that. I just remember reading a book.

“Then why can’t I remember?” (Seria)

“If you don’t, your body….” (The writing)

“…….”

“Because if you don’t, your body will shatter.” (The writing)

“Shattered into pieces?” (Seria)

I was speechless. How in the world… how could he say the answer like that? It really was the worst.

I’ve been organizing my questions, but the more I ask, the more questions I keep on having…It’s making me crazy.

Okay. Just calm down.

“Why is my body shattered?”  (Seria)

“It was the moon.” (The writing)

The engraved light didn’t last long. I opened my eyes and saw Tuban, who had been standing, coming to a hard stop and falling to the floor with a thud. It looked like a person frozen in volcanic ash or hot beeswax.

“Tuban!”

It was even worse when red blood began to flow under the gag he held in his mouth.

“……!”

A situation that quickly turned into a horror. I managed to swallow a scream. I wanted to get out immediately, but I didn’t know how to actually get out. In addition, since I came all the way here, I had to know the answers somehow.

Of course, despite this brave thought, tears were flowing from my eyes.

“Please don’t do this… I’m really scared…!”

I shivered, but I grasped Tuban’s long back hair and continued to cry while wiping the blood flowing from his gag. Even as I cried, I asked sincerely.

“What do I need to do to hear the answer you couldn’t tell me?”

“Release my seal.”

“How can I trust you? No, don’t be offended. By all accounts you are very much like a monster right now. ….”

“Hug me.”

Hug? I gasped even as I sobbed. Can’t he see that I’m shedding tears in this horror-filled situation?

“But….”

Anyway, I grabbed Tuban by his collar and wiped the blood from his mouth with his hair. I hugged Tuan, brainwashing myself into thinking he was Abigail.

Eventually, my eyes only grew more frightened.

I could feel a strange, unexplainable power from Tuban. It was like a mixture of Stern’s and Constellation Gold’s power. But I was not uncomfortable like when I felt Lina’s power from Kalis. Because I felt that Stern usually faced the same energy.

However, the power from Tuban was different. The power that I felt from Tuban was not only similar to mine, it was exactly the same.

“What the hell are you……?” (Seria)

“I am your…..”

Tuban didn’t answer until the end this time, and then collapsed with a thud. A flood of red blood flowed sluggishly from the gag in his mouth. I wiped his mouth with his hair as I screamed,

“Please don’t spill blood! How am I going to break the seal? Please tell me! Just tell me!” (Seria)

“You’ll understand when you come back to reality.” (Tuban)

I felt my strength drain away. After inquiring about how I would return from Tuban, how long I would be out, etc., I finally asked the question I really should have.

“Tuban.”

I hesitated.

“Then I…. I’m the real Seria Stern?”

Even as I spoke, I realised that this was a real ‘what if’ question. But if this world was not really inside a book, then I could not establish what my existence really was. Once again, his answer was sincerely inscribed on the Stern insignia.

“More than that.” (Tuban)

I closed my eyes and waited and then slowly opened them, because I felt like I was going to throw up my heart.

“Are there any other names you can remember?” (Tuban)n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om

“Of course!” (Seria)

As soon as I answered, I closed my mouth.

…What?

I blinked slowly.

“Hmmm….”

My mouth naturally closed. My name. My original name. I couldn’t remember it. Naturally, I thought that my real name would always be in my mind, just as my past as a graduate student naturally came to mind. But why couldn’t I remember it?

Letters engraved on the Stern insignia again.

“It’s an unimportant name.” (The writing)

“Unimportant? Do you know how much trouble I had in my previous life? Those hardships are still vivid in my mind…. I just can’t remember my name. ….” (Seria)

If this was all an illusion on my part, it would be unfair. I asked a few more questions after that, but Tuban just bled. I let out a sigh. Whatever it was, it seemed that I had to break that seal for now. I would have to check it out when I returned to the real world.

That was when it happened.

“With the Saintess.” (Tuban)

“…… Lina?”

“The Saintess and you.”

“…….”

“That Saintess and your name.”

“……?”

“That Saintess and your name is Rain….”

As I waited in frustration, I began to think that something was wrong. The speed at which the letters were engraved has slowed significantly this time. It was not a level where I could wait patiently.

I waited for a while, but I was so angry, wasn’t I Korean? Was I wrong about me being a graduate student? No matter how much I think about it, It was impossible.

“You said it’s a name that’s not important, not a name that doesn’t exist.” (Seria)

Anyway, I did have an experience, didn’t I? A mysterious being who could tell me everything was standing right in front of me, but all I could see was blood…

Even in this situation, the letters were slowly engraved. I wrinkled my forehead. My eyes flashed white again.

That’s when I woke up.

“How long have I been sleeping?”

“Four days this time. My Lady.”

“Thank God…”

It was worth mentioning to Abigail beforehand. I sighed and touched the Stern insignia beside me. Strangely enough, there was no writing on it. It was just beautiful. I also checked the circlet that I had asked to be kept around my neck. The red gem in the middle was dented even more. There was a fixed number of times I could meet Tuban.

“Where’s Lesche? Did he go back to the mansion?”

“He’s here.”

“What?”

I said and woke myself up. Abigail told me that Lesche went to the imperial Palace.

Then I went to the bathroom, which was connected to the bedroom, to wash.

‘The human heart is a very fragile thing.’

The other day, I passed out for a week and didn’t feel hungry when I woke up. It was very shocking. But this time, I was hungry and it was hard.

Maybe it was because I had figured out how to somehow talk to Tuban. When I think about it, it might be thanks to my past where I was shocked at the fact that I was reborn as a person in a novel.

Yes, I’ve been through all that, and now he told me that this place is not actually in a novel, that I turned back time, and that I’m the real Seria Stern, is that not a big deal?

That’s what I’ve decided to accept. I can’t help it. It was the fate of a graduate student to have to accept the absurdity of the world. When I thought about it, it wasn’t as painful as it had been when I was first shocked.

‘There’s no way I wasn’t a graduate student.’

It was very frustrating to see all that hard work disappear.

I was about to leave the bedroom when Abigail’s words caught my feet.

“There are many priests waiting for you outside.”

“What?”

I was puzzled. I didn’t want to talk to the priests yet. My head was full of conversations I’ve had with Tuban.

“Then they will speak with Lesche when he returns.”

Nodding, Abigail said in a calm voice.

“Your husband hasn’t slept a wink for four days.”

“…….”

****

Reminder: they’re no longer at Berg. This is arc 9, everything happened in the capital. They were staying at the imperial Berg mansion. However,  now, they are staying at the Duke of Polvas’s castle while Seria is dealing with the mine.