Chapter 40: 40

Word Count: 1905

~Avila

He immediately reaches for me, but I pull back.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to speak to you." I try not to look around at all the stares, knowing I'm part of the family this movement exists to stamp out. "Can we talk in private?"

Emerick rubs a hand through his black hair before he nods, shooting a look at everyone to move out of our way. They all fall back, but their curious stares remain stuck to me.

"Of course, sweetheart. Follow me."

He leads me through the mass of people, whose discussions remain hushed until I'm gone. I'm guided from the main room into a small meeting room. Emerick closes the door, pressing his back against it.

"I realise I may not be safe here...now that I'm married to Vade," I mumble uncomfortably, rubbing my palms together.

"No one here will hurt you. I promise," he assures me.

I wish I could take that to be true, but I don't trust Emerick. Everything he has ever told me has been a lie. He fed me a sweet story about how we met that had no truth to it, that was supposed to bring me closer to him.

"Okay...I suppose I need to just come out and be honest," I mutter.

Emerick dips his head, looking like he wants to say something but is refraining. "Go ahead."

I've considered what I would tell Emerick the moment I came here, and I feel secure in my plan. If I want the truth, I'm going to have to sacrifice some information.

"My blood was tested for dark magic and it came back positive," I tell him quickly. "Are you to blame?"

"Dark magic." He says the two words like he's tasting them, only to find it revolting. "So the rumours are true."

"Are you responsible for using dark magic to bring me back from the dead?" I demand.

He steps forward, forcing me back a step. My back hits the meeting table, causing Emerick to pause. I'm shooting him a look that warns him not to get any closer.

"No, Avila. Of course not," he murmurs. "Where would I get access to that kind of magic? Or even information on that magic?"

"You managed to convince a princess to turn against her family. Who knows what you're capable of." I fold my arms over my chest like they are armour against his words.

Emerick sighs, rubbing his jaw. "I can assure you that I do not fuck around with dark magic. No one I know has ever had access to it, and I know a lot of people."

I examine his face. I may have fallen for his lies once, but I won't again. Yet, he doesn't appear to be lying at all. The concept of dark magic seems to make him visibly uncomfortable.

"But...you have a motive," I stammer.

"I loved you so much, Avila. So much." He closes his eyes for a moment, as if to contain what he truly wants to say. "But dark magic is incredibly hard to control. The consequences of using it could have damned us both. I wouldn't risk that, even for you."

My hands delve into my hair, my fingers digging into my scalp.

"Shit..." I hiss. Emerick was who I had hoped was behind this...I don't care if he takes the fall for what he did to me. He deserves it for his plans against my family, against his brother.

"Are you certain that is why there is dark magic in your blood? You really think someone brought you back?" I question, pressing me for information.

I can't bring myself to hold back, wanting to vent. "That's the thing, I have no idea."

I'm far too scared to ask Vade if he is behind this. His motive is the strongest, and yet, he is the last person I want to have put himself in danger for me. Emerick is impulsive, and he is self-destructive. He would be the type of person to risk everything to bring me back if I could help his cause, although apparently, I'm wrong in assuming that.

"Thank you for telling me," Emerick murmurs tenderly, a smile brushing across his lips.

"Well, I only told you because I was confident you would be involved," I snap. Lest he thinks this is because I trust him, because I care about him. "And I have enough blackmail material on you as you have on me. So we are at a stalemate."

"I would never do anything to compromise you, Avila," he breathes.

Were this a couple of months ago, I would have believed him. I would have melted into his arms and thought he only had the best intentions for me. I won't be that foolish again...

"How can I be sure of that? I married the brother you hate instead of you, I'm not working the rebellion, who, by the way, want my entire family dead." I wave my hands about to punctuate what I'm saying.

"There is nothing you could do to turn me against you. That's unconditional love," he insists.

"Our relationship can't go anywhere anyway. I'm married, and I'm...I'm happy, except for nearly dying." I add the last part because there's an ache in my shoulder still and it's been on my mind. I'm not even sure why I let it slip.

Emerick blinks. "Nearly dying?"

Well, I suppose there is no way to evade the truth now.

"I was shot in one of the villages I visited. I'm okay now though," I assure him. Not that I care about whether he worries for me, I just can't deal with his fussing.

"Shit. Do you know who did it?" I question, like he's going to track them down himself.

I hold my hand up. "He was arrested. Don't worry."

He looks away, his jaw clenched tightly. Even if I don't want to admit it, I see genuine care for me in his eyes. His feelings for me don't just exist to trick me, to use me. There was something there between us before I lost my memory.

"This isn't good for you." He steps forward again, a renewed passion blazing in his eyes. "Can't you see you're not made for this role? It's putting you in too much danger. There is so much else for you out there."

He says it with so much passion I pause. There's anger buried in his expression, in the depths of his words.

"I can make a difference, I just need to gain their trust again," I say slowly, trying to keep my head, trying not to yell back at him.

He steps back, and I feel the heat between us dissipate. There is so much more he wants to say, but he's backing off. That's a smart move because now that I know he isn't involved in bringing me back from the dead, I have no reason to be sticking around.

"Come to some more meetings. Hear us all out," he offers gently.

"No...I don't want anything to do with the rebellion anymore, Emerick. I've made that clear."

His brows draw together. "Everything we have done has been based around you."

A knot twists in my stomach as I blow out an uneasy breath. If I'm the key to their rebellion, then I need to get as far away from this place as possible. I may even have to bring it to the attention of my father, of the authorities before something terrible happens.

"I'm in love with Vade, okay? I like my life at home, and although I'm uncertain about the future, the rebellion is not the answer!" I raise my voice, although I quickly realise I need to be careful.

Emerick is the only thing between me and a room full of rebellion members...

"You're only saying that because you haven't fully heard us out," he says darkly.

I throw my hands up. "I'm not...I don't have to."

"Stay tonight. You can be back before dawn," he offers as if that wouldn't put me in immense danger. "I'll explain as much to you as I can, and then you can decide."

Home is already on high alert after I was shot. The fact that I managed to get out tonight was a miracle, orchestrated by my mother's own desperation.

I mean, if they knew I snuck out at a time like this...If Vade knew.

"You're not going to risk telling me the entire truth. Not when I'm so adamant about not joining the rebellion," I bring up.

"Well, like you said, we have enough blackmail material on each other to be safe." He tilts his head, his eyes challenging me.

My fingers roll into fists. "You said you would never do anything to compromise me."

He sighs deeply, realising he's contradicted himself. So much for unconditional love. Emerick would turn against me if he had to. This cause means more to him than me, and I'm not going to allow myself to get stuck in the crossfire.

"Stay. Please." He sounds soft, desperate. "I don't want to have to make you."

I flinch. "Make me? What does that mean?"

"I can't let you go. Not until I know for certain you've heard me out." When he steps forward this time, it feels like he's pinning me against the table, closing me in so I have nowhere to run.

"You're going to kidnap me?" Panic rises up my throat, coursing through my body as the reality of what I've just stepped into falls over me.

In some ways, I trusted Emerick all over again. I trusted him not to turn on me...

"It will hurt a lot less if you don't use a word like that," he says with a grimace. "I don't want to do this, but important things are going to be happening. I have to trust that this is fate working..."

"How is this fate?"

"Because there is going to be an attack on the palace tomorrow night," he tells me lowly, glancing over his shoulder. He's definitely not supposed to be sharing this with me. "You coming here instead of me having to drag you out myself has to be fate bringing us together."

I stare at him blankly, letting his words slowly dissolve into my brain.

An attack. Vade, Roel, Crimson...countless staff and perhaps even Venna and Pria if they are around. People I care about, who don't deserve to me targeted.

"No...no Emerick you need to let me go," I insist, moving to shift around him but he grabs both my biceps into a grip that has me wincing.

"You'll be much safer here. Get some sleep, and tomorrow we can talk everything out," he offers, like this should be the best thing that has ever happened to me. "I stay in a room here. You can sleep in my bed tonight, okay?"

"No! Please!" I shriek, but he quickly slams a hand over my mouth before he can alert the others.

"This will be good for you, okay?" His smile is haunting. "I'm saving your life."

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