Farewell to the Past
The unanimous special examination, which lasted about five hours, came to an end. Shortly afterwards, we heard that we were the only ones out of the four classes that had someone expelled. It cannot be said that only a few would come to regret the choice. However, the fact that we gained 150 class points in this special exam, while the other three only gained only 50, will undoubtedly help us in future battles.
If September ends as it is, we could finally move up to Class B.
After school, I was waiting for someone on the stairs leading to the roof as promised.
About ten minutes later than the scheduled time, a person showed up.
âSorry to have kept you waiting. I had to do some post-processing and it took a while.â
âI donât mind it all that much. By the way, did you get the ending you wanted? Or was it the other way around?â
âDonât ask such a difficult question. There is no real right answer to that examâ¦At the very least, I think that is the case. There is a chance that someone will see us here, letâs change locations.â
âThat would be wise.â
Raising the corners of her mouth slightly, Chabashira began to ascend the stairs to the roof.
She then took out a key with a simple blue name holder.
âEvery year, there are more and more criticisms against the use of rooftops in schools. Maybe in the near future, this school will become one of those schools where the rooftop will be hard to gain access to.â
Even with the fence in place, there was still a risk of falling off.
Another drawback that rooftops have is that it can be used as spot for bullying or violent acts like what Ryuuen had done before. Chabashira quietly walked out onto the roof, leaned against the railing and exhaled.
âWhat a long day today has beenâ¦â¦seriously.â
Chabashira lets out a soliloquy, as if telling her pure impression of the special examination.
âAs I mentioned during the examâ¦â¦ I, too, took the same special examination during my third year of high school.â
âThat does seem to be the case.â
I didnât know what she was staring at, but Chabashira only continued to stare straight ahead at the direction of the sunset outside the fences.
âif youâre interestedâ¦â¦would you be willing to listen to my confession?â
âThe Sacrament of Reconciliation is it. Iâm not much of a religious person, but if thatâs fine with you then go ahead.â
The unanimous special exam that she was said to have taken when she was a student. It was said that they had some of the same motions as we did. The situation of her class made a large impact on the way things unfolded.
âI remember that day as if it was yesterday. We, the third-year B class, were on the verge of catching up with the A class before the graduation exam. The difference in class points was only 73. Even if we couldnât overturn it with the little time we had left in our daily lives, we were in a position to do so with one special exam left.â
Certainly, it was a very close call indeed, and Iâm sure Class A wouldnât have thought that they had the advantage by that large of a margin either.
âIn the midst of all this, the unanimous special exam began. There were five motions. Like you guys, we were able to make it through to the fourth task without a hitch, despite our differences in opinion.â
âYou said that the final motion was the same as the one we had, didnât you?â
âIs that so?â¦â¦Well, I guess youâre right. It seems that my memory is a little fuzzy from todayâs exam.â
The overlapping of the past and present may have confused her on what time she was in, as she thought about her past and spoke.
âOf course, on the first vote, there were only a few in support and the majority opposed, but as the debate continued, the situation began to change dramatically. If Class A had voted unanimously in support, the margin would have grown to 173 points.â
âSo you didnât know what exactly the graduation exam would be at the time?â
âThatâs right. As Iâm sure that youâre aware, winning a special exam doesnât necessarily mean that itâs going to give a lot of class points. Even if Class B were to take first place, if Class A is in second place, the class points may not make that much of a difference.â
The difference between the first and second place rewards could be only 100 or 150 points. Of course, it could also be more than 200 points, but there was no guarantee of that.
âThe debate grew more heated as time went on, with some saying that there was no way Class A was going to choose to expel someone, so we should all vote in unanimous opposition to get through the special exam, after which we would win the graduation exam and get into Class A. There were also those who said that it was our chance to turn things around if Class A didnât choose to have someone expelled. We talked about every possible case.â
The decisions that can come out from the very same motion could be very different depending on the situation of the class. There are only two choices. But the only way to get to them is through the many, many twists and turns of the road.
âWe spent a lot of time talking about it, but never came up with the right answer. Whether to increase our odds of moving into A class even at the cost of a sacrifice, or to choose our friends and throw ourselves into a harsh fightâ¦â¦.â
Perhaps sheâs only now fully remembering her past.
Chabashiraâs eyes, that I stole a glance at from the side seemed to be faintly moistened by the evening sun.
âEventually, my classmates slowly began to lean toward the idea that Class A, whom we class B was closing in on, would make the sacrifice to obtain the 100 points. Once we started talking about it,
the opposition slowly began to shift in agreement towards the motion.â
âEven so, itâs not easy to come together in support of something when someone is to be expelled, is it now? It is inevitable that the less able, the less communicative and the more peculiar will be the first to be expelled.â
âI agree. Once the vote is unanimous in support, it would be impossible to withdraw the decision. Itâs not easy for everyone to do so, what youâre saying is exactly right.â
A certain event that would happen in order to change that situation. In the case of this special exam, I had promised my classmates that only perpetrator would be the one expelled, and I was able to convince them to agree with me.
âThere was a boy in my class. The student wasâ¦..well, I guess the best way to describe him would be to say that he was a combination of Hirata and Ike in your class.â
âYousuke and Ike huhâ¦.. Thatâs quite the persona, even if I were to try my best to imagine it, itâs something that canât quite be put together by wordsâ
âHeâs serious, but also not quite right. He was a good friend and a smart guy, but he couldnât read atmospheres. He was the leader of the class and also the mood maker.â
I see, he was a student who somehow included the merits of Yousuke and the merits (and demerits) of Ike.
âThat guy had been struggling ever since the last motion came up. That was why he had to hand over the situation to someone else.â
Chabashiraâs hand that was holding onto the railing was filled with strength.
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âAnd then⦠he arrived at an answer. When we got the vote to be unanimous, he told us that he was going to nominate himself to be expelled. I guess he decided that he couldnât abandon his friends who had fought with him for three years.â
âThe only special exam left would be the final graduation exam. It will certainly be painful for the class to lose the leader, but that was only one of the optionsâââwasnât it?â
Of course, it is hard to say that it would be a wise choice to have him expelled.
However, if all of her classmates were on an equal footing, it would be very difficult to choose one of them.
There is also the option of letting luck take its course, but Iâm sure there would be many who wouldnât be satisfied with that.
âBut then again, we never reached a unanimous vote from that point onwards.â
ââWhy? It was agreed that the leader would be expelled, no?â
âNoâ¦â¦it was only because of a single person, they continued to vote against his expulsion until the end. The one vote in opposition never turned to a vote in agreement, and the remaining time was whittled away. The one who continued to vote against it, was none other than me.â
From the way the story was told, I thought this might have been the caseâ¦â¦ which meant thatâ¦..
âTo Chabashira-sensei, the student who was the leader was more than just a leader to you, right?â
Closing her eyes, Chabashira laughed once at herself, and then slowly opened her eyes again.
She then looks up at the sunset sky as if affirming something deeply.
âThatâs rightâââ. For me, he wasâ¦..a leader, a friend, andâ¦â¦. and a lover who was more important to me than anyone elseâ¦. The irony is that it happened the day before the special exam was held.â
The two had overcome many hardships and had come to an understanding of each other. The future was supposed to be about grabbing the most happiness out of their remaining school life and aiming for A class. This was why Chabashira could not let go of him.
âIf I kept throwing my vote in the opposite direction, my classmates would naturally be confused and angry. Some of them even nominated me for expulsion. Well, it was all but natural I guess.â
âBut if Chabashira-sensei didnât get expelled, that meansâ¦â¦.â
âYes. It was an âI protect him and he protects meâ situation. Such a stalemate went on and on. We couldnât finish the special exam on time, so our class went down by 300 points, and class A had chosen to expel someone, so the difference was 450 points. In total, the difference was 523 points. In an instant, the distance between us and Class A, which had been so close, had opened up to the point of despair.â
It was a point difference that no graduation exam could turn around no matter how big.
âIf itâs any consolation at all, your lover didnât get expelled, did he now?â
âI donât know what I myself was protecting it for, but when the Unanimity Special Exam was over, our relationship naturally ended. It was only a dayâ¦. actually, even less than 24 hoursâ¦â¦. After that, we were defeated in the direct confrontation of the graduation exam that awaited us, and our three years had came to nothing.â
âAnd then what happened with him?â
âI havenât seen him since. I donât even know where or what is it that heâs doing now. When I was in high school, this school was everything to me, and he too, was everything to me. Fuâ¦â¦â¦ but if you were to think about it over the course of a long life, three years of high school is nothing but a small part of it. Even if we didnât make it to Class A, we should have fought to the end with no regrets.â
Does this mean that Chabashira has been regretting the mistake of her decision for the past 11 years?
No, in her case, it would not have been a mistake, but rather a continual questioning of whether or not the choice she made was the right one.
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âI didnât have the qualifications to graduate within A class, thatâs just how it was. But I wonder what should I have done? Should I have forcefully persuaded him not to nominate himself for expulsion? Or should I have cut him off when he was planning to voluntarily be the expellee?â
âThere is no real right answer to this particular special examination. It would probably be impossible to achieve the perfect unanimity from the heart. That is, unless there is a classmate in your class who is so thoroughly unskilled that no one wants them to be in itâ¦â¦â
Nevertheless, this did not mean that there was no way out for them.
âI believe there was only one way left for Chabashira-senseiâs class to make it to Class A at that moment. If I had to say, I would say that the cause of your defeat was because you didnât see through his strategy.â
âMy failure to see through his strategyâ¦â¦?â
âAt the beginning, when you all were trying to persuade everyone to vote in opposition, he had already decided to be the dropout in order to leave you all the chance of moving up to A class. What he first needed to do, was to get the vote to be unanimous in support so that his plan could bear fruit.â
Chabashira nodded, as if remembering back to those days.
âIf Iâd had cut him off thenâ¦.â
âWas the graduation exam so easy that you could win without a good leader? Your class lost despite having no dropouts during the unanimous exam, no?â
âIndeed. If we could have fought as one and in perfect condition, we might have even been evenly matched.â
âIn other words, you couldnât have chosen to be without a leader. On the other hand, if anyone were to be missing from the class, then A class wouldâve been out of reach due to disorder. If that was the case, the only way was for all of you to stay with the option of oppose instead of agree. You should have refused all temptations and incitements and held your ground.â
âBut even so, I myself wasnât in a position to persuade the others to vote in opposition. Although I admit that what you said is true.â
âYou didnât have to persuade them. Senseiâs class was divided in their opinions on how to win. If the votes donât coalesce, eventual defeat by running out of time would be inevitable. When that happens, the proponents will absolutely move to consolidate the opposed votes. Even if they resist with their mouths, what if it is the final round of voting with less than a minute left? If you had voted in agreement then there would have been no way to move onto the next vote which was to choose a student for expulsion. The interval time is a fixed 10 minutes, but the maximum amount of voting time is only 60 seconds. If you had adjusted the time by deliberately delaying the vote, you could have brought it to a final vote where there would not even be a single minute to spare.â
If they had chosen agreement, they would have gotten -300 class points for failing to clear the special examination; If they had chosen oppose, they would have cleared the special examination with a +50 to their class points. Therefore the option of choosing the former should not even be considered.
âYou canât turn your back on the reality of the situation, even if blood is rushing to your head. You couldâve either run out of time and lost 300 points, or made sure that you cleared the exam and obtained 50 points to bring to the graduation exam in order to reach class A, even if you donât obtain the extra 100 points. There was not only one conclusion. Of course, Iâm not certain that you could have filled the 173-point gap.â
The students were not ready to give up the idea of winning and were preoccupied with the immediate 100 points.
The leader of the class was able to take advantage of this psychology and succeeded in getting them to agree to it.
But that strategy itself was a mistake.
He couldnât see through Chabashiraâs heart, nor could Chabashira see through the stubborn intentions of the opposite sex who had become her lover.
ââââIâ¦â¦ If there was a student like you in our class back thenâ¦â¦â
As she was about to add-on something more, she closed her mouth.
âNo, thereâs no point thinking about it now. People canât go back in time. But let me ask you this, Ayanokouji. Sakura mustâve been a member of your close group. Moreover, that girl even had special feelings for you.â
âYou sure know a lotâ
âIâm still your homeroom teacher after all. I can often tell by just looking at a studentâs eyes.â
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She replied, not proudly, but somewhat dismayed.
âWas there no way to save Sakura and sacrifice another?â
âI wonder myself. At that time, Horikita had indescribable control over the class, like a being that could not be denied. I donât think there was enough time for me to make her fully back down.â
âYouâre very clerical, arenât you? Does your heartâ¦..not hurt?â
âOf course, it would have been best if we could have avoided expelling Airi. I tried to bring it to a unanimous vote in opposition by any means I could, but I couldnât stop Kushida. I decided that there would be no solution unless I chose to expel her as the perpetrator who forced the class to make such a choice. However, if she had been willing to be consequential, there might have been a possibility of unanimity through opposition. At the time, Kushida was so disturbed with Horikitaâs presence that she willingly accepted the choice to stay in this school. I hadnât expected that at all. Iâm not the only one who wants to help the students who are close to me. But with that happening, the only thing left to do was to use the process of elimination. At that point, there was no choice but to bring out the discrimination card to my classmates. Whether or not they could study, whether or not they could play sports, communication skills, insight and observation skills. There was no choice but to look at the objective data, which was the OAA rankings.â
By looking at the system that the school itself had created, everyone could see who was at the bottom of the pile even if they didnât want to.
âOf course, there are quite a few whose abilities arenât all that different from Airiâs. But if a quarrel were to start between my classmates, their friends would naturally take their side in order to protect them. However, with Airi, the only major obstacle was Haruka. Even if she self-nominated, it would only be a loss of ten minutes.â
âIn other words, what youâre saying is that you deliberately went after your own peopleâ¦â¦â
âHer personality was another deciding factor. Because of Airiâs personality, sheâs not good in behaving as someone who doesnât want to be expelled or appealing not to vote for her. I could use any number of convenient methods. A good friend, in this case Haruka, would never vote in support to her expulsion. However, the only exception to this would be for Airi to selfnominate. There was no way Airi couldâve chosen to stay in school and bear the burden of having the class sacrifice 300 class points in order to protect herself.â
âYou even predicted Sakuraâs state of mind, didnât you?â
âHer overall strength, the people around her, her personality. And as a final push, someone important to inform her that she should be the one to be expelled. If I myself told her that, sheâd have no choice but to accept it.â
âAyanokoujiâââyouâreâ¦â¦â
âPeople may call someone who thinks like me a demon or an outsider. No one wants to play a role that is detrimental. But if we have to, we have to do it without hesitation. It is an unavoidable part of protecting the class, and therefore the organisation.â
âIn this school, expulsion is a constant threat in every possible situation. As a teacher at this school, I am always prepared to accept it. But even so, I will never be able to make a decision like yours without hesitation.â
Acknowledging the weakness of her own heart, Chabashira said so.
âI donât know you all that well, but how many people have you cut off? How much must you cut off before reaching that territory?â¦â¦ Actually, no, donât answer. Iâm sure I will never understand it even in my whole lifetime.â
How much have I cut off? Iâve never even thought about such a thing.
Just as we donât remember the color and shape of each stone that falls by the roadside, those who learn with us and those who teach us will disappear from their positions if they are incompetent.
That is artificial selection.
âThank you for taking the time to meet me today, Ayanokouji. I regretted the choices I made in the past and stood still for a very long time. But as it turns out, I donât even have the time to do that anymore. I will fulfill my role as a teacher and guide the students in my class so that they can continue to fight without regret.â
âIt seems that through this special exam, you were able to say goodbye to the past.â
Chabashiraâs face as she spoke was somewhat more radiant than before.
âItâs not as if I havenât dreamed of reaching A class before. Even when I try not to think about it, I still hope that I might be able to make my unfulfilled dreams come true. And every time I do, I ridicule myself for being so stupid and erase it from my memory. Thatâs how it went on and on.â
Chabashira turned to me and showed me a smile that Iâve never seen her have before.
âIâve decided, Ayanokouji. Iâm going to make sure that your class is able to graduate in class A in every way I can.â
âBeing enthusiastic is fine, but please donât deviate from your position as a teacher.â
âMuâ¦â¦No, of course Iâm aware of my position. There is only so much I can do, but Iâm ready to do it. You always say things a student shouldnât be saying.â
âUnlike a student, huh? What is the right way for me to respond to that?â
ââEven if you were to ask me that, I wonât be able to answer it. Iâm not a student after all.â
No, no, no, this person is a mess.
âIf youâre done talking, Iâm leaving.â
âYeah. Sorry for taking up so much of your precious time.â
âI donât mind it. Then, please excuse me.ãChabashira-sensei.ãâ
Thatâs what Iâve been calling her for a while now, but I said it with a bit more emphasis.
Perhaps because I thought that she was being a bit cheeky. In response, Chabashira-sensei quietly smiled and nodded.
She would be fine now. Through this special exam, she has grown about as much as the students.
Her mind, which had stopped in her third year of high school, quickly began to catch up with her current age.