University has always been a place I liked going to. What I never realised is that a lot of that had to do with the fact that I could shift and go there. Now that I live in a place where shifting in public isn't really acceptable anymore, it suddenly seems like a far better idea to just stay at home.
Of course I don't do that. I do like uni. I like that for once, I'm actually being taught things I want to know. I also like children, which is why my placements are the weeks I look forward to most. I won't have any for the first few months here, but that doesn't throw me much.
As expected, when I walk into the posh looking university building and enter my first lecture, most students decide to openly gape at me. I'm a big guy, tall and with decent muscles, so together with the fact that I'm new and none of them have seen me before, I suppose I would be quite a spectacle. I don't really react and just sit down, minding my own business. I don't get talked to, which I'm actually quite pleased by. The only thing that bothers me is that I can't tell for sure how many of these people are werewolves. I can tell there are a few but their scents are all muddled because of the close proximity to humans. Still, there's not enough of them. I'm used to rooms almost entirely filled with werewolves, not this overwhelming mass of humans.
After three lectures, all of them two to three hours long, I'm honestly just tired. I want to go home, have dinner with my mom and sleep. Even if it doesn't bother me much, not having any social contact and actually paying attention to tutors is exhausting.
I slowly walk down the hall towards the exit of the building, wanting nothing more than to shift, when I pick up this scent. My reaction is immediate.
My head whips up from where it was hanging, straight towards the door, and when I can't see anything, I run.
I run toward what can only be my mate. I push students aside, ignoring their complaints as I make my way to the outside as quickly as possible.
When I pass the door, frantically whipping my head from one side to the other to try and spot my mate, I finally find her looking straight at me.
I don't even register anything as I walk towards her, not running anymore as I know I now have her attention, but at a brisk pace anyway because that first contact with our mate is one of the strongest cravings we feel in our lives.
She takes a few tentative steps towards me, but before she can even walk to me properly, I'm already there, gripping her arm to pull her towards me, to hug her and smell her neck.
None of that I actually get to do, because the moment I feel the connection between the two of us when my hand touches her arm, I get ripped away.
Instinctively I growl, turning around and facing whoever got in our way.
I'm barely able to hold myself back from strangling him when I realise how he smells. It's enticing. And it's also my mate's scent.
Immediately I lunge myself at him. How dare he's close enough to my mate to have her scent all over him!
I size him up. He has about the same built as me, if he isn't a bit taller, if only be maybe half an inch but anyway. It's hard to tell with both of us half crouching.
We're attracting attention now, but neither of us really seems to notice long enough. His scent is confusing me still, but riling me up even more. It's just the two of us, trying to determine who is dominant in this situation.
I faintly realise that I'm moving to the right, while he is mirroring my steps to the left. We are, effectively, circling each other, gauging who would move first. My eyes never leave his dark grey ones and his never leave mine. We're close, only maybe an arm's length apart from the other's face and if either of us would not react quick enough to the other's attack, that person could be fatally wounded.
All my muscles are taut and my whole body tense, his as well. I can see the muscles on his arm move as his hands form fists that get tighter by the second. Soon, I can smell his blood as it drips down from his palms, where his nails broke the skin. I don't look though. One mistake and he can easily end me. This is pure instinct at play.
An unknown voice penetrates the thick tension in the air and both the guy in front of me and I move our eyes over the my mate as she tells us to stop.
I can see him relax slightly, realising I do too, but only because it's my mate asking me to. I don't want to let my guard down in front of my enemy, but I don't have a choice. Pleasing my mate is a number one priority.
'Stop it, both of you.' She says then, defeat clear in her voice, before she steps between us, way too close for me to not want to touch her immediately, but even more so to him to want to rip her away from him.
She turns her back to me and looks at the guy in a silent conversation and I'm ready to move towards her, but she turns around before I can.
'What's your name?', she then asks, a small smile on her lips. I can tell she's trying to calm me down.
'Donovan.' I say, the growl still evident in my voice. But I forget everything once she lightly touches my arm, her smile now bigger than before.
'I'm Sheila.'
We stare at each other for a long time, but when we get interrupted, the only thing I wish for is for it to have been even longer.
'Come one, Sheila, let's go home.' The guy says, grabbing her hand and pulling her away.
I growl immediately, grabbing her other hand. There are two things completely off about this situation. The first is how he touches her so easily and the second is the implication of a shared home.
'Donovan.' It's my mate's voice and my stare down with the guy stops at once. I look at her, waiting for her to tell me what it is that is on her mind.
'This is Raphael.' She nods towards the guy still holding her hand, 'And he's my mate too.'
It's silent then. Not just because nobody is saying anything, but also because it seems like my heart stops; and his too.
Both Raphael and I are staring at her as if she lost her mind and at this moment I can't even be mad at anyone.
Before I know it, both of them are gone. My mate apologised so many times, but I didn't react to any of it. I just stand there now, numbly realising how the crowd around me slowly disperses, but I only move when I notice someone tapping my shoulder.
The tiny girl the moves around me and looks at me curiously.
"I would take you any day over that asshat." she shrugs then, introduces herself as Meredith, or Mary, for short, and then just leaves.
I slowly trudge home, a million thoughts in my head but none clear enough to actually deal with right now.
When I'm in front of our house, I try to open it four times before I realise that it's locked. I look for my keys and, once I find them, try to unlock it. My hand shake so much though, that I can't even find the key hole. My second hand comes up to try and steady it, but it does absolutely nothing. I get frustrated, curse under my breath, but the only thing I really want to do is cry. And eventually, I do.
That's how mom finds me. Standing in front of our door, my forehead leaning against it and my eyes shedding tears shamelessly.
'Darling, let's get you inside, okay?'
She takes the key from my hand and opens the door herself, leading me inside with one hand on my back to get me to actually walk.
Half an hour later, I sit on my mom's bed, a hot chocolate in one of her giant mugs in my hands and her by my side. I told her everything, from smelling my mate, to the immense confrontational feelings I felt towards that Raphael guy. It's part of why I'm so upset. This isn't me. I'm not violent or irrational and it scares me that I gave in to it so quickly and so easily.
'It sounds like a problem.' mom eventually says. It's very like her, to come up with a non-committing answer like this, as a way to tell me she's thinking.
"I honestly don't know what to tell you. I'm sure you're aware that you can't be angry at Raphael. It's not his fault, after all."
She's right as well. I know it's not his fault and I know it was wrong to lash out at him like I did, but I still don't like the guy one bit.
'You should have a chat with them. From what you tell me they're quite close, so maybe have them come here, where you're a bit more comfortable.'
Her suggestion makes sense, on a logical level, but my heart wouldn't stop beating painfully anyway. I don't want both of them in the same space, let alone see them like that. I want my mate for myself, like any other wolf wants their mate. Like Raphael probably wants her.
I take a sip from my hot chocolate, contemplating mom's words, trying to come up with a perfect solution. But really, there is none.
I finally find my mate, the person I have been waiting for for such a long time, and she already has a mate. Bad enough that there are two of us, but they already are in a relationship from what I can tell. It hurts, it hurts a lot, especially knowing that right now, they are probably together as well.
The ringing of the phone interrupts our silence and mom lazily stands up to get it.
I don't listen in, even though I could have, but instead just try to make myself calm down and not cry again.
Mom comes back in ten minutes later, and she looks pale, which is rare for her.
'Who was it?' I ask, knowing that there's not much that makes mom have a look like that.
'The local pack's alpha. They want us to come in. Sheila is his daughter.'