Chapter 56
MIRABELLA
One thing about embracing truth is the pain that comes with it. The truth rips you apart piece by piece, it feeds on your inside, forces you into solitude, messes with your head but it somehow finds a way to make you feel whole.
Embracing and coming to terms with my truth havenât been the easiest thing to do but I oddly feel whole. I feel satiated. Iâm at peace with myself because I allowed the truth take charge.
But thereâs a whole lot of other
comes
er issues arising like a great storm within me and I cannot say fo
say for sure how Iâm to remain calm when that storm
Is it regret?
Is the love I feel for my husband still there?
Is my past catching up on me?
I do not know but all I know is thereâs just so much that I can take.
A small knock sounds on my door and I donât need a seer to figure out whoâs on the other side. I hurriedly wipe my face clean of every traces of tears or sorrow or even sadness.
Why does he bring out this side of me?
âCome in.â I call out and the door is gently pushed open, revealing my very own husband who somehow has a way of looking better and better each time I see him.
âWhat are you waiting for? Sit down.â My lips stretch into a smile as I point him to a seat at the opposite side of me. And with a deep hum, he plops down on the seat without ripping his gaze off me.
He tips his head back and leans back, pushing his hips forward so that his legs are widely thrown apart whilst his elbows are rested above his knees and his interlaced fingers under his chin. âIâm truly sorry, Mirabella.â He begins but the shakiness of his voice betrays the confidence he wanted to exude.
Exhaling shakily, he resumes speaking. âI never wanted things to get so messy between us. It was never my desire to end things with you in the manner which I didâ
My interest piqued. âReally?â
âYes.â He murmurs
âBut you
still did it anyway. I exhale a shuddered breath. âI cried.â
He looks down. âI know.â
âI begged you on my knees.â
âI know.â
âYou called me a whore. Said that I paid those men to touch me in the way I didnât like. You accused me of staging a rape and an attempted murder on myself.â
He shakes his head, feet tapping away against the floor nervously. âknowâ
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âYou didnât want to end things?â Tears slip out of my eyes. âBut you overlooked my pleas. You overlooked my desperation to be near you. You overlooked Pabloâs pleas and you pointed your gun at me.â
âMirabellaâ¦I know.â
âYou pulled the trigger and you meant for me to die.â My voice a monotone. âIf Pablo hadnât jumped in front of me, Iâd be dead by now. Because of you, Pablo is no longer here with us.â Another tear slips down my cheek.
âI know⦠I fucked up.â
A low whimper breaks out of me but Iâm quick to conceal it with a scoff. âYou hit me. Again.â
âMi dispiace.â He let out an agonizing whimper, causing me to clench my jaw in order to pull myself together.
âMi dispiace?â I chuckle. âIfI had died, would you be seeking forgiveness at my tombstone? Would you be begging whatever would be left of me for forgiveness?â
His fingers slides into his hair, fist grabbing a chunk of his silky hair and tugging painfully hard as a lone bear stains his cheek. âI donât know what to say, Mirabella, I was lost, I was angry, I wasnât myself. Iâm not trying to make excuses for my behavior but I thought that everything we shared was a lieâ¦a means to an end. It broke me to think that. Iâve lived with the guilt of that day for five years and now Iâm begging you to find a place in your heart to forgive me. Please, Mirabella,â
âNo, Matteo!â Rage courses through my bones. âYou donât get to come here after all this time and expect me to be your little sunshine! Itâs been five years, Matteo and Iâd be a fool if I willingly give you another chance to hurt me all over again. Whatever happened between us few minutes ago was nothing and you should definitely not hold onto that. Please leave.â
âMirabella please. Just one more chance. An opportunity to make it right is all I ask. His pleading eyes meet mine and I look away from him before he succeeds at luring me into his dark hole.
âI canât give you what y you ask, Matteo, but because Iâm not a bad human being, thereâs just one thing I can do for you.â His orbs full of expectations bore into mine and I suck in a breath at the beauty of his irises. âIâll not be at home half the time tomorrow so Iâm giving you an opportunity to have an outdoor picnic with the kids. But please do not pass on any information that might weigh heavily on my children. Iâll not tolerate it.â
He nods as he gets off the seat, heading for the door.
âAnd Matteo?â His head whips towards me with such sharpness thy has me squirming âPlease speak to mama and Julia because by tomorrow morning, theyâll be leaving for my safe house in Milan.â His eyebrows furrow.
âMilan? Why? Why your safe house? Why not ours?â
âWell, because they donât want to be a part of this life any longer. They want to live normally without constantly looking over their shoulders. Mother just wants peace seeing that this life has taken a whole lot from her and Iâm certain the pain is eating her away. I believe the community Iâve built in Milan will help her recover from all this.â
I have never seen Matteo somber up so quickly in all my time of being together with him. He no longer sees the need to hold back the tears. He loses himself completely, his lips and body trembling vigorously as he stumbles back.
âWhy didnât she talk to me?â
I let out a scoff. âHave you seen yourself? Do you not see how much of a monster youâve become? Youâre very unapproachable even for your loved ones and I wouldnât blame her for fearing you the way she does.â
His lips thin, his head bobbing in understanding whilst he stares at me, waiting to see if I have something else to say.
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âAlso, meet up with Ares so the both of you can go over the list of your men thatâd be joining us here. Your four wise men or whatever you call them will also be coming in by noon tomorrow.â He nods. âOne more thing Matteo, behave yourself tomorrow, my boyfriend will be coming
over.â
A humorless chuckle erupts from the back of his throat, his eyes narrowing into slits. âYouâre still my wife, Mirabella, and I find it disrespectful that youâre casually speaking to me about another man.â
He motions towards me and before Iâm able to step away from him, his large hand is already wrapped around my neck. He tightens his grip around my neck and pulls me flush against his chest with his face inching very close to mine.
âItâs been five years, Matteo.â
myself for you. You will not cheat on
âExactly.â He breathes. âFive years of me abstaining, five years of staying celibate, five years of keeping myself me Mirabella.. I will not allow it as long as Iâm under the same roof as you.â
âThen leave.â I seethe and surprise flashes his orbs but his stance remains unwavering. âArenât you quite the hypocrite? Asking for my fidelity when it was you who used to bring your whores into our home.â
âIt was just once Mirabella, and our situation then was very different.â
âI donât care. Heâs coming and thatâs finalâ
âYouâll not rub your infidelity on my face, Mirabella, Iâll not allow it. I am still your husband and you my wife. You still bear my last name.ââ
âThe fact is about to change because if you were to walk into your room now, youâd find divorce papers perfectly arranged on your bed. All you have to do is sign them and set me free from your darkness.â
Excitement and darkness dances in his orbs, his grip around my neck tightening to a point where my air flow is nearly cut off. The corners of his lips tug into a lopsided smirk as his lips grazes mine in a ghostly manner.
âYou belong to me. Youâve always been mine. Not anyone elseâs. Mine!â He growls through his clenched jaw and a chuckle makes its way out
of my lips.
âYouâll sign those papers, Matteo,â I choke out and he hums continually, bobbing his head in the process whilst his thumb swipes across my bottom lip
He pushes me away but not with so much force and mutters with so much authority and challenge
âMake me
There are many pros and cons of being a boss.
Pros? Money, power, recognition, comfortability. The list goes on and on. Cons? Donât even get me started on the cons of being a boss, especially being a boss of an organized crime group.
The two most disturbing disadvantages being that if youâre not running for your life, youâre working your ass off and today, Iâm stuck between both. Working as well as shielding myself from the enemies lurking in every dark corner,
I had to wake up as early as five a.m. because I needed to make sure that my mother and sister in law arrived Milan safely, I then proceeded to prepare the food and snacks necessary for the success of my kids and Matteoâs picnic.
I prepared for the transport thatâd convey the boys here and also the transport thatâd convey my boyfriendâMarkâhere without any problems.
12:25 Sat, 22 Jun
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Handled some shipments at the port, handled most of Matteoâs business seeing that he claimed not wanting any distractions as he spends
time with the kids.
And now, Iâm exhausted and famished. Which is the exact reason Ares, Zara and I are sneaking into the house through the back door so that weâre able to creep into our rooms before weâre spotted by anyone but I guess thatâs not happening anytime soon seeing how my eyes lock with that of Alessioâs when I approach the stairs.
Alessio who has my daughter in his arms
âHello, Mirabella.â Everyone stills, their heads snapping towards my direction and i plaster a smile across my lips as I stalk over to them.
âAlessio.â I nod, turning to face Dean and Maxwell who has their mouths gaped open and their eyes widened. âDean, Maxwell,â I acknowledge and Maxwell gulps aloud whilst laughter bubbles out of Dean.
âI knew I wasnât hallucinating Shit! Itâs Mirabella, in the flesh!â
âLanguage, uncle Dean!â Mariana yells and he throws his head back in laughter muttering a, âsorry.â
Maxwell steps forward. âAre we allowed to hug you or what?â With a scoff, I nod and his large arms are immediately wrapped around me. He coos, murmuring how much theyâve missed me into my ear.
âHave yo
you become more beautiful or have you become more beautiful?!â Dean beams, engulfing me in a hug, lifting me off the ground with a playful grunt. âYouâre so out of this world.â
Dean finally let go of me but Alessio isnât coming forward, he stays rooted on the spot but his eyes speak something different. His eyes tell me that he wants a hug as well but is too conflicted to demand for one. So, I take matters into my own hands and step forward.
âAlessioâ¦â I offer him a tight nod and he hands Mariana over to Maxwell before throwing his arms around me with a relieved groan. âMirabella, your absence wasnât an easy one to deal with. You left a void in all our hearts.â He murmurs and I wrap my arms around him tighter until the caveman of the hour clears his throat.
âHow have you all been coping without Pablo? And how are you all even here with him? How can you forgive such atrocious act?â I enquire, my eyes burning holes through Matteoâs skull. His shoulders slump, regret glints in his orbs and his jaw locks so tight that the grinding of his teeth is outlined.
Alessio is the first one to speak. âIt wasnât easy. It is still not easy and we were angry for a really long time but we had to tell ourselves the truth. We had to remind ourselves that Pablo was somewhat miserable whilst he was alive. He wanted to go but was too much of a coward to take his life by himself and when he saw an opportunity, he took it.â
This is new
âWhy was he miserable? Was it because of the scar?â I question further and this time, Dean speaks up. âIt wasnât necessarily the scar. Yes, the scar made him somewhat distant but one time, he went to Russia for an errand and returned a shadow of himsel!â
The tension in room peaks high to a point where it sends scold shivers down my spine but I donât back down from glaring at Matteo.
âI donât care that he was miserable but one thing is for sure, I will never forgive the culprit. Not now, not ever.â A muscle feathers in Matteoâs jaw. As if on cue, the front door is pushed open and my boyfriend walks in, a smile plastered across his face when his eyes land on me.
I smirk at Matteoâs reaction and turn on my heels, running into Markâs outstretched arms but the uh oh that resounds from Dean doesnât go
unheard.
âIâve missed you, Mirabella.â Mark mumbles into my shoulder and I hum. âItâs been a few days.â I murmur and he let out a chuckle.
I crane my neck back to get a better view of him. âYou want something to eat?â He shakes his head ânoâ, yawning almost immediately as he
Chapter 56
picks me up, wrapping my legs around his torso.
âIâm exhausted. Letâs sleep for now and grab some food later?â
âOf course
âUncle Mark!â Mariana greets but I notice Mariano rolling his eyes before forcing out a fake smile. Mark doesnât care to acknowledge Marianaâs greeting seeing that his eyes are locked in a glaring battle with those intimidating hazel ones that I know too well. And right now, those eyes tell me that Mark has just stepped into his death but I can only hope that Iâm able to keep them away from each other until we all depart from here.
âI cannot believe you brought your exâhusband.â Mark spits and I roll my eyes. âNot here and definitely not now.â Before my statement is done, Markâs lips are on mine, kissing me possessively and it takes a lot for me not to snap at him.
But only because I understand his desperate need to mark is territory.
I doze off in Markâs arms as he carrieâs me upstairs and itâs not until late into the night when I hear hushed murmurs coming from downstairs that I stir awake from my sleep, tiptoeing downstairs only to be met with the most disgusting sight.
âSeriously Mark? Even with my kidâs nanny?â
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