Chapter 100
As dawn broke, casting a soft glow through the gauze curtains, Zhao Heng stirred from her slumber. The canopy was lowered, blocking out the candlelight, and the soft bed had been moved to the side of the bed, where Li Wenjian lay fast asleep.
The midwife had warned that Zhao Heng's exertion during childbirth would leave her exhausted and that it might take some time for her to fully awaken. She had suggested that Li Wenjian retire to the adjoining chamber for a bath and some rest. However, Li Wenjian refused to leave, loathing the anxiety of waiting in another room.
He had even insisted on entering the birthing chamber, and the palace maids, unable to dissuade him, had reluctantly followed. He had stayed in the bedchamber, eating and sleeping, fulfilling his promise to remain by her side, never leaving her even for a moment.
At the break of dawn, Li Wenjian heard a stir from within the canopy, and his eyes shot open. He instinctively sat up, rushed to the bed, and lifted the canopy, hanging it on the golden hook.
Bathed in the golden candlelight, Zhao Heng's eyes fluttered open, and she suddenly felt a warm, broad hand gently caress the back of her cool hand.
Zhao Heng turned her hand over and clasped his.
Li Wenjian leaned down and kissed her forehead, his touch soft and lingering. After a long while, he pulled away, his forehead pressed against her cheek, breathing slightly heavily. Zhao Heng heard him whisper with joy, "Ah Heng, thank you."
Zhao Heng opened her eyes and met his gaze, the corners of her lips lifting into a gentle smile. "Thank you for what?"
"For being safe."
"For your hard work in bearing our child."
"Ah Heng, you have no idea how agonizing those six hours were for me, waiting outside the birthing chamber."
Zhao Heng chuckled, leaned in, and gently kissed his cheek, saying, "I saw Grandma coming to take me, and then I heard you calling my name, so Grandma let me go with you."
âItâs wonderful to see you again,â Li Wenjian said as he gazed at her, slowly wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close.
Zhao Heng looked a bit tired, her pale face showing a hint of weakness. Li Wenjian was afraid she might be hungry, so he got up to put on a robe and bring some food. After they had eaten, the nanny brought the baby over.
She looked at the baby in the nannyâs arms, who was wrinkled and squished, with his features all squeezed together and barely recognizable. Zhao Heng looked at her son's face in the swaddle and a smile tugged at the corner of her lips.
They say that a son resembles his mother, but she hoped that her son would be like Li Wenjian. She wanted to see what he looked like as a child.
*
On the day Zhao Heng finished her postpartum confinement, An Xuzhi came to celebrate with a gift.
"Has the name for the prince been chosen?" An Xuzhi asked as he held the baby, his posture stiff, as if he were holding a beloved sword like a general.
Zhao Heng stood beside him, looking at the baby's face and smiled, "It was chosen by the Emperor, his name is Ziyuan, nicknamed Youyou."
"Youyou." An Xuzhi repeated the name a few times, looking at the baby with particular tenderness.
After a while, Li Junning and the others also arrived, all eager to hold him. An Xuzhi handed the baby over to them.
An Xuzhi had official duties and couldn't stay long, so he left after a brief sit down to say goodbye.
Zhao Heng walked him out.
As they walked through the palace, neither of them said a word. The past was slowly fading away in the river of time.
The sky was drizzling, and when they reached the bridge, An Xuzhi declined her offer to accompany him further, "You're still weak, there's no need to see me off, go back."
Zhao Heng nodded in agreement, and then noticed the indigo shoes on his feet. Embroidered on the shoe were clusters of pine and cypress trees.
"You finally decided to wear these shoes," Zhao Heng remarked with a smile.
An Xuzhi smiled back lightly, "A shoe's true value is when it is worn on the feet."
"That's right." Zhao Heng lifted her gaze, looking at him with gentle and open eyes.
An Xuzhi gazed into the distance where the rain curtain was falling, feeling a bit amused.
In his youth, he had many foolish thoughts, thinking that feelings could wait and that cherishing a pair of shoes meant keeping them treasured.
But now, things had changed and the once treasured shoes had been ruined by insects.
He realized he was wrong.
*
The autumn rain had fallen steadily throughout the night, and the sky outside the vermilion window was gradually lightening.
The Empress slowly opened her eyes, turned her head, and in the dim dawn light filtering through the window, she looked at the man lying beside her pillow.
He was still asleep, his eyes closed, the morning light outlining his slightly slackened profile. He was no longer as handsome as he used to be, and because of his illness, he appeared thinner and somewhat disheveled.
She gently reached her fingers to his nose, feeling his faint breath, and let out a sigh of relief. It was good that he was still with her for another day.
The Emperor woke up and saw her sitting by the bed, facing the rising sun in the distance, her figure resembling a jade pillar. Under the sky that was not yet fully bright, the sprawling palace complex in the distance led to the unfinished mausoleum.
"Ah Yu," the Emperor called her name.
The Empress turned her head to help him sit up.
As the sky gradually lightened, the Empress got up to dress and after having breakfast together, his spirits improved remarkably. He took her hand and they slowly walked to the riverbank.
A round red sun, resembling a duck egg yolk, slowly rose from the horizon.
The dazzling light of dawn illuminated the Emperor's stooped figure, which looked unusually old and weary.
Concerned, the Empress supported his arm and tremblingly said, "Your Majesty, let me help you back."
With her support, the Emperor sat down in the pavilion by the river, let out a long sigh, and asked her, "Ah Yu, do you know what I was thinking just now?"
Sitting by his side, the Empress shook her head.
"I recalled our past before I entered the An's residence," the Emperor said. "I had never tasted sweet cakes before. You made them for me for the first time, and there was too much sugar, it was too sweet. I couldn't understand why you all liked such things. Later, my mother told me that it was the first time you cooked."
His tone was tinged with a smile, but the Empress sensed the sorrow and regret beneath that smile, and she couldn't help but remember the foolish things she had done in her youth, like making ugly pouches and unappetizing sweet cakes.
"I have done my best, but it's really difficult," the Empress said, holding his hand, tears welling up in her eyes uncontrollably.
"I know, Ah Yu, you have always been good," the Emperor's emotions seemed to be getting out of control for a moment. "It's my fault."
The Empress felt a bit shocked, staring blankly at the man before her, his face filled with sadness and self-blame.
The Emperor at that moment was no longer the authoritarian figure that everyone was accustomed to. He was just an ordinary man, aging and frail, filled with regrets and uncertainties.
In the light of dawn, the Empress slowly sighed, wiped away the tears on her face with her fingertips, and said, "In this lifetime, I've sacrificed a lot for the greater good, but I have never regretted any of my decisions. I will always remember how carefree and happy you were as a young man, getting entangled in endless schemes because of me. If there is a next life, I would still choose to meet you again."
The Empress gazed at him, smiling slightly, "In the next life, I will still be your wife."
He held the Empress's hand, tears shimmering in his eyes, and trembled as he said, "Yes."
On the third day of October in the eleventh year of Xuanhe, the Emperor passed away due to illness in Qingzhou.
On the twenty-first of November, he was entombed in the underground palace in Qingzhou.
On the first day of December, Crown Prince Li Wenjian succeeded as the new Emperor and changed the reign title to Cheng'an.
With the new Emperor ascending to the throne, everyone was busy and overwhelmed. Li Wenjian had already been involved in governing before, so his coronation didn't affect him much.
It was Zhao Heng, the Empress, who had handed over the responsibility of managing the inner palace to Zhao Heng before leaving, and the tasks had piled up like mountains. She was so busy that she didn't even have time to drink water.
In the evening, Zhao Heng returned to the sleeping chamber amidst the snow that had accumulated over time, and it was already late.
Inside the sleeping chamber, Li Wenjian's laughter could be heard. In recent days, due to the sudden passing of the Emperor, he had not laughed like this in a long time.
Zhao Heng lifted her skirt, took a step into the inner chambers, with no pearl curtains to shield her, the scene inside the chambers was laid bare.
He held his son in the swaddling clothes, gently touching his round chubby cheeks with his fingers, making him grin widely. He laughed along with him.
"Is it fun?" Zhao Heng approached.
Due to her difficult childbirth, Li Wenjian had not been in good spirits with the child before, and he hadn't even held him on the day he was born.
Zhao Heng had always been worried that he wouldn't like the child, so she always held the baby in front of him. He couldn't bear to see her struggle to hold the child, so he often took the baby from her arms. Gradually, he ended up holding the baby more than she did.
"You're back?" Li Wenjian saw her return and immediately handed the child to the nursemaid, then embraced her waist and kissed her neck from behind. "I've been waiting for you for a long time, little You'er has slept for a while."
Zhao Heng leaned against Li Wenjian, in a moment of intimacy, yawning loudly before pushing him away, walking to the dressing mirror. She raised her hand to remove the jewels from her head, and murmured, "It's so troublesome, there's so much to do that it seems never-ending. Today's tasks are completed, but there's a whole pile waiting for me tomorrow. It's endless, I'm so tired. I won't go tomorrow."
Li Wenjian helped her remove all the decorations from her head, then loosened her hair and gently ran his fingers through her hair, lightly massaging her scalp.
"What's wrong?" He looked at her reflection in the mirror, her cheeks slightly puffed, she was not someone who abandoned tasks halfway through, he didn't believe she would stop halfway.
Zhao Heng didn't answer, she hugged Li Wenjian around the waist, her cheek against his abdomen, gently closing her eyes.
Li Wenjian lightly brushed her eyelashes with his fingertip, and Zhao Heng still lazily leaned against him, keeping her eyes closed.
After a long pause, she mentioned that she had received a letter from Yueli today, and she had traveled to the Northern Mansion, experiencing the vast snowy plains.
Li Wenjian massaged her shoulders, "Do you want to leave me and go see the world with her?"
"Of course not." Zhao Heng lifted her eyelashes, meeting Li Wenjian's dark eyes, "What's the point of enjoying the scenery alone without you? I'm just tired, that's why I'm having these thoughts."
When Li Wenjian ascended to the throne, no Empress had been appointed, and her status had not yet been established. People in the palace said she didn't have a proper title and didn't put forth enough effort in her work, making her feel somewhat powerless like punching cotton.
Li Wenjian's smile curved at the corners of his mouth because of her response, he bent down to her ear and whispered softly, "Tomorrow, I'll accompany you to the Daxiangguo Temple to ease your mind."
Zhao Heng's eyes brightened, nodding heavily.
The next day, Li Wenjian took Zhao Heng to the Daxiangguo Temple for blessings. He had promised to accompany her since spring, and they had delayed until winter before they could make the trip.
Li Wenjian and Zhao Heng first worshiped in the main hall, then she and Li Junning went to the back hill to pick plum blossoms, without him. He went to the meditation hall to talk to the abbot.
When Zhao Heng returned from picking flowers, she learned that Li Wenjian was still in the meditation hall, so she lifted her skirt and headed towards the meditation hall. The oil lamp flickered, casting Li Wenjian's shadow on the door. She was about to knock when she suddenly heard his voice.
"Is this day really foolproof?" His voice was calm but tinged with a hint of nervousness.
The abbot replied, "This day aligns perfectly with Your Ladyship's destiny. If the investiture ceremony for the Empress is held on this day, she will be able to ward off calamities and have good fortune in all matters."
"Thank you for your advice," Li Wenjian said.
The abbot bowed with his hands together and said, "May His Majesty's intentions for Her Ladyship summon blessings from the heavens, ensuring her a fortunate future."
"Let's hope so."
Ah Heng had lived a hard life, and he hoped everything would be well for her, better and better.
Zhao Heng listened, somewhat puzzled, as the door unexpectedly swung open. The young emperor looked at the person standing before him, momentarily stunned, then a smile crept onto his lips.
"Did you hear everything?" He brushed the snow off her shoulder.
Zhao Heng met his gaze steadily, blinked slowly, and before she could speak, he eagerly said, "Be my Empress."
Outside the corridor, heavy snow fluttered down, intertwining and swirling.
The light in the sky gradually faded, but lanterns lit up under the eaves, illuminating the faint smile in Zhao Heng's eyes.
-End of the main text