~For fuckâs sake~.
How many times could she find herself at ~one~ personâs bedside? She had found him in a state, and now they were back to square one.
Maya was sitting on the bed, her eyes closing every few minutes as she fought off sleep so she could keep watch over Julian.
Alex had brought him in, and Maya had braced herself for the worst.
But there was nothing.
No injuries, no blood. Nothing.
Yet he was unconscious.
Alex hadnât been any fucking help. He had no answers. He didnât know what had happened.
All he had done was bring Julian to her room and hand her a fucking broken, filthy teddy bear.
~What the hell was she meant to do with a damn dirty teddy bear?~ And what did it have to do with Julian? Apparently, he had led them to it.
As if that made any damn sense.
But until he woke up, she wouldnât have any answers.
She had thought about slapping him, but she had held back. Maybe he had really lost his mind.
Maybe he had brain damage they hadnât detected and now he was crazy, ready for the white straitjacket or something.
Could she have possibly broken him during sex? No, he had seemed fine the next morning.
~Damn it, Julian~.
She was supposed to have found her mate, not a child who needed constant supervision. And why the hell was he out there with ~Alex~, of all people?
She had tried to get an answer from the big bad alpha, but he had told her it wasnât his place to say.
~Oh sure, now Alex didnât want to make all the decisions~. Talk about damn bad timing. Sometimes she wondered if he was doing it on purpose just to annoy her.
Maya slowly lifted a hand and let it hover over Julianâs forehead. She hesitated for a moment before brushing his dark hair away from his forehead.
They were wet, stuck to his skin by the excessive sweat that clung to him.
~What happened to him~?
His skin was cold to the touch, clammy even. It was like someoneâor somethingâhad scared the life out of him.
She kept her fingers tangled in his hair as she turned her head to the side, glaring at the sad, broken teddy bear on the nightstand.
âWhat are you, possessed?â she asked it, ignoring the fact she was a little crazy for talking to an inanimate object.
~Could hunters even do magic?~ She didnât know. She didnât know much about them. She knew their purpose in life and wasnât ~really~ a fan, but beyond thatâ¦they were deadly.
And usually ~deadly~ and ~teddy bear~ werenât found in the same sentence.
A teddy bear.
A bloody teddy bear.
It could have belonged to a child.
At that thought, a rock dropped in her stomach, and she felt like someone had reached inside of her and taken hold of her heart. ~Did Julian have a child? A child he had forgotten about~?
Sheâd heard what Willow had said about his family, about how he had lost it.
Could it have included a ~child~?
Mate or not, he could have loved someone. He could have created ~life~. She might be his mate, but how could she make up for this kind of loss?
How could she fix this kind of damage? She didnât know if she couldâ¦or even wanted to.
But could she leave him like this?
Alone and broken?
~Damn~.
Why was this her damn life?
Did she curse too much?
Or was it because she didnât care enough?
Was it because she didnât have a purpose, or a goal, a life?
Why was this her life, her punishment? Why now?
She could have gone her whole life without ever meeting Julian. But no, her stupid self had to find him on the brink of death, and she had to ~help~ him.
Nowâ¦how was she supposed to walk away? How was she supposed to leave his side?
Maya didnât like feeling like this. A weight was crushing her chest, emotions bubbling out of her.
That seemed to be the moment Julian thought was perfect to scare the life out of her. He sat up in a snap, his arms flailing around, hard enough to push her off the bed.
Before Maya could blink, she landed face-first on the ground.
~Damn it~.
Son of a bitch.
She winced, hissing as she drew in a breath, pressing her palms flat to the ground as she lifted her head up.
Before she could crawl back onto the bed, she was stopped in her tracks by the sound of sobs echoing through the room.
Maya had seen Julian go through a few things in their short time together, but the pain being torn from his body was one she hadnât seen before.
He was completely ~broken~. He was sitting, his hands clutching at his knees, fingers digging into the skin as he stared ahead.
His eyes were open, but the tears were spilling from them regardless.
âJuâJulian?â she tried, almost afraid to break the trance he was in.
He didnât look at her or acknowledge her. She crawled into the bed, keeping her movements slow and quiet.
By the time she was sitting next to him, he had yet to realize she was there.
Maya leaned in, reaching for his face with a trembling hand and cupping his cheeks. Once she had a hold on him, she forced his head to turn and meet her eyes.
His pupils shifted left and then right, never quite focusing on her.
âJulian, what the hell happened?â
âHe murdered her,â he murmured. âHe took her life right in front of me.â
She drew in a sharp breath, aware that she had to probe further, yet dreading the answer. ~Youâre in too deep, Maya. No escaping this one~.
âWho did he kill? The teddy bearâs owner?â
He gave a nod.
âAnd who was that?â
A moment of silence, a deep breath. Long enough for her to feel a bead of sweat trickle down her back.
âMyâmy kin, my sister.â
Maya was the worst kind of personâshe really was. What he was revealing was utterly devastating and horrific.
No one should ever have to witness their family being slaughtered before their eyes.
Yet, a tiny part of her, a fraction, felt a massive relief at his confession. ~She shouldnât~. Because his loss was immense, enough to almost send him into a state of shock or maybe it wasâ¦
~Hold on.~
~He remembered; he recalled somethingâ¦~
This was not the right time for her to rejoice over his regained memoryâ¦not in the slightest.
She did wish he could have remembered anything else butâit wasnât coincidental.
Clearly, that teddy bear didnât just appear out of nowhere. Someone had placed it there hoping Julian would find it: to mock him, to torment him.
Whatever the motive, the scheme had succeeded.
âIâm sorry,â she finally responded, her hand falling from his face to his lap.
Were there any suitable words she could offer to ease his pain? Technically, she was his future mate; realistically, they were practically strangers.
~What solace could she offer him~? What could she utter that would sound genuine and not insincere?
He lowered his head, his forehead resting against hers as he sought her hand. He laced their fingers together, inhaling deeply.
âMy damn head is throbbing,â he admitted, and she detected a trace of a ~smile~ in his voice.
âJulianâ¦â
âI canât recall much. ~Her face~. Them. I didnât evenâI canât remember what ~he~ looks like. But I know he killed them. He spared me. I donât know why.â
She had no answer to give. But evidently, he ~could~ remember. Perhaps he needed strong triggers. Triggers that could shatter him.
But somehow, she doubted she could prevent him if he decided to pursue them.
Damn it.
She had to assist, didnât she?
The burden was in her heart, the guilt coursing through her veins. Julian was a large man, a leader, and seeing him in this state was deeply disconcerting.
They had attempted his approach, both times. He had tried to converse with Willow twice, and both times he came back empty-handed.
~Maybe his method was flawed~.
But Maya refused to accept that she had slept with him and knew nothing.
Something didnât add up. Julianâs initial instinct had to be correct. She was concealing something.
Given their recent experiences, Maya found it difficult to trust outsiders.
~Everyone was full of crap, including her~.
So, alright. She would see if Willow could outsmart a seasoned liar.
âIâll fetch you some water. Iâll be right back.â
âYouâre not telling the truth,â he retorted, letting go of her hand, sending her conflicting signals. He was releasing her, but he knew she was being dishonest.
âYeah, Iâm not.â
But he didnât say anything more.
âGoing to stop me?â
He shook his head. âHe canât continue to get away with this shit.â
~She couldnât agree more~.
She could tell he was itching for a fight. He was thirsting for revenge. But he couldnât shake off the melancholy that enveloped him.
She couldnât fathom reliving someoneâs murder repeatedly. Especially not someone she loved.
âThen Iâm going to handle this my way.â
He couldnât stop her, even if he wanted to, and she suspected he was aware of that. Maybe under different circumstances he could put up a stronger resistance, but not now. Not in this state.
âIâll have Olivia look in on you. In case youâve fried your brain or something.â
He didnât respond, offering her nothing more than a nod.
She noticed his hands moving up to cradle his head. ~Was he still in pain? Did something else occur? Did he remember more, and he wasnât sharing~?
Maya held back her questions, biting her lip.
Sheâd deal with him later.
For now, Willow was her target.
~That woman better be prepared~.