Chapter 43: Breaking the Tension

Olivia was perched on the couch, her toes curled under, her lips pursed, pretending to read and absorb the words from the book in her lap.

After Maya had given her a rundown on nesting, she’d attempted to dig deeper on her own.

She certainly didn’t want to discuss ~that~ in a room full of kids.

Sadly, the books she found didn’t offer much more insight than what Maya had already shared.

It left her feeling uneasy.

Was this what it meant to be an omega?

Was she really creating a nest for them, and so fervently for him? What was expected of her? To wait for him? To just lie there?

“Liv, if you sigh one more time…”

She jumped, startled, dropping her book and looking up at Maya.

“What’s the matter?”

“Nothing’s the matter.”

Maya’s eyes narrowed. “I think I know you well enough to know that’s not true. Did something happen?”

“No… I was just…pondering. About the whole nesting thing.”

“What about it?”

“It just seems like alphas have a lot of control over omegas, that’s all.” She understood there was a pecking order, a hierarchy, but this felt like such a power imbalance.

Alexander hadn’t demanded anything of her or done anything, but she knew that ~some alphas~ could.

Selfishness was universal.

She’d never truly experienced an omega’s heat, and now that it was approaching, she realized how easy it would be to exploit one.

“It depends on your perspective.”

“What do you mean?”

“Okay, I mean—yes. You’re building a nest, you want him to approve, he’s the alpha, all commanding, all-powerful, yada yada,” she started, waving her hand dismissively. “But you’re forgetting...it’s a two-way street.

“As much as you want to ~please~ him and you ~need~ his approval...he’d do anything if you asked him.” She leaned back into the couch.

“If you asked him for something that would make you happy? He’d do it. You snap your fingers, he’ll deliver. So in my opinion, it’s more of a power exchange, a balance. You both hold the reins.”

She’d never considered it that way.

Mainly because she hadn’t really asked him for much. In fact, she’d spent a lot of time pushing him away. But he did respond when she called.

He allowed her to set the pace when he could have rushed things, and if she was being honest with herself, she would have let him. He could have had her by now.

“Don’t believe me? Test it.”

“I’m not going to exploit him.”

Maya rolled her eyes. “I’m not suggesting you take ~advantage~ of him. I’m saying, let’s conduct a...scientific experiment.”

~That sounded exactly the same~. “Or we could not.”

“You’re the one with concerns! This way, you’ll see that you’re ~not~ being forced into a life of submission and servitude.”

She blinked. “That-that’s not what I said.”

“To-may-to, to-mah-to.” She grabbed her hand and shook it. “A small request. Ask for clothes? I doubt he packed your entire wardrobe in a suitcase when he moved you here.”

“You want me to ask him for clothes?”

“You’re the one who wants to play nice.” Maya tapped her chin, evidently weighing the options.

“Interrupt one of his meetings!”

“What?”

“Yeah, go in there, tell him you want to spend some time with him.”

“I’m not going to do that.”

“Why not?”

“Because he’s ~busy~.”

“He won’t mind, trust me.”

It wasn’t so much that she was afraid Alexander might get angry with her, but more that she didn’t want the pack to resent her. If she pulled him away from important business, she could be jeopardizing the pack.

She didn’t want them to think she was selfish because she was trying to make a silly point. Besides, she wasn’t the one who wanted to prove something—Maya was.

“You could always wait until night. Ask him to go down on you for a really long time. He’ll agree.”

“I think I’ll pass,” Olivia quickly responded, her ears turning red.

“Hold on a second.”

“What?”

“Your ex never went down on you, did he? Wait. Has ~anyone~ ever done that for you? I bet not! If they had, you wouldn’t have ~declined~.”

She hunched her shoulders, suddenly finding her shoes fascinating. “I mean—when we were together, it was always spontaneous. We didn’t really do…much else besides, well, the actual sex.”

“Oh, honey.”

Before she could process Maya’s words, she was enveloped in a comforting hug. “Alex is going to rock your world. You deserve it.”

At twenty-two, she often felt like she was back to being a naive sixteen-year-old.

Her sex life had taken an unexpected turn when she became a werewolf. It wasn’t what she had envisioned.

If it weren’t for her experience with Will, she might still be a virgin.

On the other hand, she might have been more reckless without him. She could have crossed paths with an alpha long before she met Alexander and then…~she didn’t want to contemplate that.~

“You know what, this is ridiculous. You’re probably right.”

“No, no, that’s not entertaining.”

“What’s not entertaining?”

“You just agreeing with me.”

“Why not?”

“~Because~ you’re the only one who can give Alex a hard time without facing consequences. I need some amusement.”

“I’m not going to boss him around for your entertainment.”

“So you ~do~ want to boss him around?”

“No, that’s not what I—”

“Boss who around?”

~Damn~.

She recognized that voice instantly.

His scent engulfed her as he approached, and she tried not to inhale. It was the only way to keep her thoughts ~rational~. That and staying away from his room. Whenever she was near, she felt the urge to go ~tidy~ the nest.

That’s why she’d spent the day downstairs with Maya. His mere presence was so overpowering that she figured she had…two days at most? Was she ready?

“No one,” she responded, keeping her back to him.

If she didn’t look at him, it would be easier. Right?

“You guys finally decided to get some fresh air?” Maya inquired, successfully diverting the attention from her. ~Thank you, Maya~.

“We just returned from patrol,” Jason chimed in, entering her line of sight. “We need to head back upstairs.”

Was it normal for them to patrol so frequently?

She’d never asked, but she’d noticed a constant rotation of pack members coming and going, vanishing into the distant fields. Were there that many disputes with other packs, or was it about keeping humans away?

She doubted they’d run into many humans out there; it was pretty secluded. Then again, there were always those enthusiastic campers. Maybe they were the issue.

Olivia looked at Maya, hoping for some insight. But her face was impassive—she wasn’t revealing anything.

“Have fun, I guess.”

He was leaving.

He was leaving again.

Of course, he was. He had told her he would. He was occupied. He couldn’t devote all his time to her. It was okay.

This wasn’t—a rejection. A rejection? Where did—where did that come from? Why would she even consider that? It was absurd. She was being absurd. She saw him. He was leaving.

And then he wasn’t.

Why wasn’t he?

It was her.

She had grabbed his shirt. She had prevented him from leaving.

~Oh~, what had she done?

“Yes, Livy?”

Right. Now she had to speak.

“I-I’m hungry.” ~Ugh~. Suddenly Maya’s clothing suggestion didn’t seem so bad.

“Could you make me the …uh eggs from last time?”

He was silent.

Of course, he was silent.

“Unless you’re busy. You were leaving.”

“Start without me.”

What?

~Oh.~ He was addressing Jason.

“But—”

“I don’t like repeating myself.”

“O-okay.”

“Let’s go,” he said, taking Olivia’s hand and leading her to the kitchen.

As they passed her, Maya shot her a smug look that seemed to say: I told you so. Yes, she had.

His hand was warm in hers, and she tightened her grip. This was the first time they’d touched since the night he’d given her his shirt to wear. He hadn’t come to bed that night. She knew he’d only promised to try. He had other things on his mind.

More important things.

It wasn’t about her. If it was, he wouldn’t be here with her.

If only the newly awakened part of her could understand that, she wouldn’t be plagued by this constant anxiety that made her feel sick.

He led her to a chair, but she didn’t sit.

She watched him as he searched the fridge, and all she could think about was what she’d done to his walk-in closet.

“Maya told me.”

“Pardon?”

“About the nest.”

~Of course she did~.

Did they make muzzles for people? ~Ugh~. She couldn’t look at him now. This was weird; could he read her mind? How did he know? It didn’t matter. Anyway.

It wasn’t like she thought he’d never find out.

She was sure that ~she’d~ show him eventually. It had been bothering her. His approval. Did he—did he think it was silly? Did he think it was a bad idea?

~And why did she care~?

“Oh,” she finally said, after a moment that seemed to last forever. She swallowed, touching the bare skin of her neck. “Did—did you see it?”

“I didn’t look.”

Rejection? Defeat?

Whatever this feeling was that was growing in her chest, she didn’t like it. “Oh.” Did that sound as desperate as it felt?

“I haven’t been to the bedroom.”

“I know.” She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t be around him right now.

Her mind was a mess and she didn’t feel like herself. She couldn’t think clearly and she couldn’t decide if she wanted to stay or run.

She tapped her fingers against her thighs, feeling her heart pound against her chest. Space. She could think better with space. “I wasn’t—I’m not hungry. I’m fine.”

He looked confused.

“But you said you wanted food.”

“I—well, the thing is.” First, she was trying to distract from what Maya had said. Second, she hadn’t seen him in over a day. Just seeing him made her skin hot and flushed.

She could lie to herself and say distraction was the only reason she had led him away but she couldn’t do it.

She’d gone to bed alone. He had warned her about this.

Yet, she couldn’t help it; she needed him, his touch, his closeness. She wanted to feel his body.

Sadly, she had no idea how to say that.

Alexander walked around the counter, his steps slow as he tried to meet her gaze, forcing her to look at him. “The thing is what?”

Oh God. He was close. So close. And he smelled good. So good.

She licked her dry lips, feeling a shiver run through her body. He leaned in and she held her breath.

“The thing is?” he asked again.

The thing was…

~Screw it.~

~Kiss him~.

She grabbed his shirt collar, pulling him towards her and pressing her lips to his. He didn’t seem as surprised as she thought he would be, his arms wrapping around her waist almost instantly.

His lips were heaven against hers and she opened her mouth wider, wanting more of him. He growled and a need grew in her.

As his hunger grew, so did his boldness.

She barely had time to register his stronger grip when he moved them quickly.

She winced as her back hit the cold metal of the fridge but the pain was fleeting.

His hands were all over her as she whimpered against his lips. She tried to lift her left leg, wanting to cling to him, but she didn’t have the strength.

He seemed to understand her intention as he grabbed her thighs, lifting her. She hooked her feet under his back, holding herself up as he moved his hands to her butt.

Olivia moaned into his mouth as he squeezed, his large hands covering her entire ass. She threw her head back, breaking their kiss.

She felt a desperate need as she gripped his shirt and pulled at it, as if it would relieve the tension building between her legs.

Before she knew it, she was grinding her hips against him, trying to help.

She didn’t care. Her teeth bit into her lower lip, the faint metallic taste of blood filling her mouth.

Her neck was bare, and he didn’t hesitate.

He trailed kisses down her throat, drawing out moans from her. He pressed against her, letting her feel his own mounting desire. ~Oh, fuck~.

“P-please.”

Her mind was a whirlpool of desire, her mouth parched, her thoughts in disarray. A glaring ~danger~ sign was flashing in the back of her mind, but she ignored it.

His tongue traced her collarbone and she felt her nipples stiffen. He was so close.

“Please what, Livy?” His voice was a deep rumble, resonating on her skin. “What do you want?”

Nothing. Everything. Him.

“I-I don’t know,” she murmured.

“That’s not an answer.”

Why was he forcing her to speak? She didn’t want to talk.

“T-touch.”

“You want me to touch you?”

She nodded.

“Then say it.”

She wanted to yell but she couldn’t gather the strength. “Touch me, please.”

His satisfied growl sent a shiver down her spine.

His hand slid across her stomach, moving up until it reached her breast.

She let out the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, her body humming as he cupped her breast, his fingertips brushing the top of her exposed flesh. Too many clothes. There were too many barriers between them.

She needed…more…less?

Olivia raised her hands and tangled her fingers in his hair, pulling. Was she pushing him away or pulling him closer?

His lips met her skin. His warm tongue teased her breast and she heard herself moaning his name. Her body was a river of fire. Her hips moved on their own and her hold on his waist was unyielding.

The bulge in his pants was a promise she wanted him to keep. His hips matched her rhythm and she leaned forward, burying her face in his neck. He smelled amazing—so comforting. Like home and safety.

Did he taste as good as he smelled?

She didn’t wait to find out. She nipped at his skin, the desire to leave a mark pulsing in her mind.

She wanted to bite him.

Would he bite her?

~Did she want him to bite her~?

Why did this make sense to her? Why biting?

But then she wondered how it would feel to have his teeth grazing her skin, breaking the sensitive flesh…

And then he set her legs back on the ground. What?

Her mind was a whirl as her feet touched the cold floor, a chill sweeping over her skin as he pulled back slightly. Wait, no! No. Close. Touch. Why was he pulling away? Her heart plummeted, and panic seized her.

She clung to his shirt, fear icing her blood.

As her body went into overdrive, his nose gently brushed her cheek. “Calm down, Livy,” he commanded, his voice firm.

As he pressed his forehead to hers, panting heavily, his knuckles white from gripping her so tightly, she wondered if he was talking more to himself than her.

“If I keep touching you, I’m gonna fuck you on that counter.”

~And that would be a bad idea because…~ Of course, it would be a bad idea. Public room. No privacy. People. What the fuck was she thinking. And they had a nest.

The nest was better. ~No, Liv. That’s not why he’s stopping. He’s stopping because normal people don’t have sex in the middle of the kitchen~. Logic and reason had completely deserted her.

If he had tried to fuck her, she would have let him.

“Right. Right.”

But he didn’t move.

Why didn’t he move?

“Livy?” he asked, his breath tickling her ear.

“Yeah?”

“You’re gonna have to let me go.”

She frowned, the skin between her eyebrows creasing. She looked down, realizing she was still clutching his shirt as if her life depended on it. ~Oh~. She forced a shaky smile onto her lips as she let go of him.

“S-sorry.”

He laughed. “Don’t worry, tomorrow, you won’t be able to get rid of me.”

“T-tomorrow?”

“Your heat’s gonna start tomorrow. I gotta do a few things first.”

“H-how do you know?”

His fingers slipped into her jeans, pulling her underwear away from her skin. Pleasure coursed through her as his hand slipped inside, and her knees began to buckle.

The moment he arrived, she felt her knees weaken. How could a single touch ignite such a reaction? How could his mere presence set her entire being aflame?

She gasped as he slipped a finger inside her.

It was barely there, just enough to tantalize, yet she tightened around him instinctively. As if that could make him stay. But as swiftly as he had given her a taste, he withdrew.

Tears welled up in her eyes, blurring her vision.

She blinked rapidly, dispelling the tears that threatened to overflow. Just in time to see him taste her on his own finger.

~Oh boy~. She was in deep.

Deep trouble.

~Deep, deep trouble.~

“Tomorrow,” he echoed.

He pulled away from her as if he hadn’t just done ~that~, and turned to walk back to the kitchen counter.

“I’ll stay and cook for you.”

“No, I’m fine.” Because food wasn’t what she was craving.

“You need to fill up.”

“Fill up?”

“You won’t be eating for a day or two.”

“Why wouldn’t I—”

~Oh~. OH. She didn’t think her cheeks could burn any hotter or her eyes could widen any further, but clearly, she was mistaken.

She dropped her gaze to the floor, unable to meet his eyes. “Okay then.”

The embarrassment she felt didn’t quell the growing arousal within her.

The thought of spending two whole days with him made her tighten involuntarily, a shiver of anticipation coursing down her spine.

This desire ~might~ be the death of her.