Chapter 83: Stitching Wounds

“Olivia.”

“Alexander.”

His suppressed grunt reached her ears, and she noticed the involuntary twitch of his nose. She was aware of his desires, but she chose to ignore them.

~This~ was her preference. If she paused, her heart would race to the point of inducing nausea, and she was determined to prevent that.

“You need to rest.”

“And I will.”

Her gaze remained fixed on Jason, her hands steady as she completed the stitches. If he hadn’t arrived—if he hadn’t assisted her...the outcome might have been different. Perhaps she ~wouldn’t~ have had to ~kill~ the same man twice.

The first time she plunged a knife into Will, she believed he was dead. Now, due to his fixation, she was forced to repeat the act.

Previously, it was self-defense, a reaction to uncontrollable emotions.

This time?

It was a fight for her freedom. For as long as she could recall, ~he was always there~. Even when he wasn’t physically present, he loomed like a dark specter, extinguishing her inner light.

After the assault, after losing everything, she was akin to a child. She transformed into a different person ~after~ he took her under his wing. But she didn’t evolve into her potential self. She became the person he desired.

Her omega nature amplified her vulnerabilities, making her feeble, reliant on him, a mere shadow of her former self. He constructed her entire reality—and she allowed it. It influenced her life, her decisions, her relationship with Alex.

It affected her perception of her new identity, her demeanor.

Now she was faced with a decision; would she allow her actions towards him to continue to impact her?

How much space would she permit him to occupy in her life?

It was a massacre. Everyone suffered. Another ~pack~ got entangled. All because of his hatred, his refusal to accept her rejection. He never accepted the word no. Not from her, not from Jess.

That was the root cause of her life spiraling out of control.

“I meant ~now,~ Livy.”

“Back to Livy?” she queried, attempting to suppress the twitch of her upper lip as she tried to force a smile. “Is bossy Alex gone?”

The first time, she was shattered. Her world crumbled.

This time?

She was unsure of her feelings, and it terrified her. The attack had ~affected~ her.

He had once again robbed her of her autonomy, drugging her, and compelling her to shift at will. Something she had never done before. Initially, she despised the wolf within her. She suppressed it.

Recently, it had resurfaced—whispers, words, emotions. But now? It was constantly present.

Yelling at her.

Causing her hand to shake.

Ever since the adrenaline had subsided, the drug leaving her system, she hadn’t been able to silence it. It was bellowing in her chest, shouting at her, demanding from her like never before.

She had resisted it for so long, but it had emerged when she needed it the most. Without that part of her, she might not have survived.

~But it came with a price~.

Even now, it disapproved—no, ~hated~—the way she interacted with Alex.

He had requested something of her. ~She should comply~.

Olivia withdrew her hand from Jason, releasing the skin she’d been holding to stitch him up with her other hand.

She clenched her fist, feeling her nails dig into her palm. ~No~. She couldn’t heed him. Because this wasn’t about ~him~. This was about ~her~.

Being a werewolf amplified her emotions, and she never learned to control that aspect of herself. If she allowed herself to pause, if she allowed herself to ~think~, she might drown in her emotions.

She might let the guilt triumph and if she did that…then Will would be victorious. He would always be a part of her, manipulating her even from beyond the grave.

She had to let go.

Olivia was about to tend to Jason’s wound again when she felt Alex’s hand on her elbow. “~You’re hurt.”~

“I checked, I’m okay.”

“You’re drenched in blood.”

“It’s not mine.”

Some of it was hers. Most of it wasn’t.

“That’s why I’m saying…”

“Many people were injured, Alex.”

“I’m aware.”

“Many people suffered because of ~me~.”

He released her elbow, but not to distance himself from her.

Instead, he held her shoulders, compelling her to look into his eyes. “Livy. ~Stop~.” There was power under his touch. He could harm her, but he didn’t.

“This is what a pack ~does~. They would have assisted anyone else in danger. This is our way. Stop believing the nonsense he filled your head with. It’s not about you being ~mine~.”

She yearned to trust his words.

There could be some truth in them. But would he have forgiven anyone if they hadn’t stepped in? She had always been only ~his~. They all knew. She was ~Will’s~, then she became Alex’s. But when was she last ~Olivia~?

Just ~Olivia~? Was it before her parents passed away? Before she was orphaned? Everything happened so quickly…

“Alex…” The words were lodged in her throat.

That connection, the one she’d heard about so often, the one he claimed to feel, the bond they used to lack, the one she initiated, was stronger than ever. She got it.

The urge to be close, the solace of his touch, needing him like she needed to breathe.

She was thankful for him.

Without their encounter, she’d still be under Will’s control—living the life he had planned for her. Believing his lies, never seeing past the façade he had so meticulously built.

She didn’t want to live apart from the pack. She didn’t want to be away from ~him~.

But something ~inside her~ felt so delicate.

“I need this, please.”

She didn’t even attempt to mask the pleading in her voice, the breaking of every word she uttered. She couldn’t expose herself to him more than this. There was no concealing; she was revealing the scars.

His eyes hardened and she could ~see~ the denial in them, but he didn’t voice it. Instead, he pursed his lips, restraining the words she thought he would say.

“You take a break. After each one of them, you sit, you drink water.” His eyes swept the room as he held his breath. “Everyone in this room. Then you’re done for the day.”

It felt like a command.

She knew fundamentally it was, but he was doing it out of concern. Yet, he was yielding. He was allowing her to have her way without pressuring her. She didn’t plan on doing this all night.

Her trance was going to shatter, she was going to break.

She just needed more time.

More time before it overwhelmed her and before she had to confront what remained.

She’d been so engrossed in surviving, in resisting…she hadn’t noticed everything that had shifted. Not until Alex had jolted her back to reality.

Now that she was ~truly~ liberated.

Now that she was ~truly~ complete—wolf and human—who was she?

She forced a smile as she stood on her toes and gave him a swift kiss on the lips. “I promise.”

He looked at her as if he could see right through her.

As if he was gazing at whatever was hidden beneath the surface.

If only she could see herself that clearly.