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Wuxian rarely had conflicted feelings. He always knew what he loved and what he hated. He believed that his clear emotions are one of his strong suits. He loved his soul-bond and children. He loved teaching his disciples and the close relationship he has with his father and Zewu Jun. He loved his brother Jiang Cheng.
But he hated this moment more than anything in the world.
He had a healing session yesterday. Unlike the previous session, this one came with a prominent side effect. His muscles ached fiercely and he had trouble controlling them. All night long, he suffered through pain and violent shakes which made Wangji stay up in vigil.
The look of terror in his daughter's eyes as she begged him not to die was the most painful moment in his life. He hated it. He wanted to comfort her but was too busy fighting with his body to do anything other than try to lay still and moan in pain.
Healer Shi took mercy on him and knocked him out for a while. He hated this. He hated the look of worry on Wangji's face. He hated the cries of his little girl as she sat close to him but not touching him in fear of causing him pain. He hated the look of sadness on his father's face while he sat with him during the day. He hated everything about this.
He suffered through it for two days but he wasn't the one who was dealt the worst hand in this. He woke up the third day to find his daughter and soul-bond next to him. Wangji was holding his cold hand and silently praying with his eyes closed. Hweiru was in Wangji's lap, silently shedding tears from her bloodshot eyes. The circles under both their eyes is a testimony to their struggles.
Wuxian whispers with a hoarse voice: "Lan Zhan.."
Wangji's head snaps up and he looks intently at him: "Wei Ying, are you in pain?"
Wuxian shakes his head: "I'm fine now."
He looks at his sullen daughter and smiles: "Hey, my sweet girl. Did you eat?"
Hweiru purses her lips as a few more tears escape her eyes.
Wuxian frowns and looks at Wangji: "What happened?"
Wangji rubs the girl's back and whispers: "She's refusing to speak."
Wuxian struggles to sit up but manages after a few shaky trials. He opens his arms, silently asking for Wangji to hand her over. The moment she's close enough to him, she clung to him so hard and sobs violently in a clear display of terror. Wuxian shushes her and rocks her until she falls into an exhausted sleep.
Wuxian looks at his soul-bond: "You look tired."
Wangji reaches out and grabs his arm while looking sadly at him: "I was so worried."
Wuxian: "I don't remember that much.. Was it that bad?"
A single tear escapes Wangj's eye and he whispers: "It was bad."
Wuxian moves his child to his side and taps the empty side. Wangji lays next to him in bed and places his head on his lap and sighs in content, falling asleep after a few minutes of Wuxian stroking his hair.
Wuxian felt guilty for their suffering. These two cannot live or function without him and his health will take a greater toll on their emotions than his body.
Healer Shi silently made her way into their room to check on her patient. She found him comforting them while they slept clinging to him.
Wuxian turned to look at her when she cleared her throat. He whispered: "Little turtle.."
She smiles at him and sits near his over-occupied bed: "Little rabbit, how are you feeling today?"
Wuxian sighs: "Better. The pain is gone but I feel tired and shaky."
Shi nods: "It will get better after you start moving around."
She hands him a few potions with water and helps him hold the cup with his shaky hands.
Wuxian looks at the two sleeping figures on his lap: "Why do they look more haggard then I do?"
Shi: "The girl was distraught. She thought you were dying and it triggered her. Hanguang Jun had a hard time comforting her and she went into shock. She refused to let you out of her sight and just sat there waiting in silence. No food or sleep. She was clearly terrified of losing you and he was at a loss on how to handle her and be there for you at the same time."
Wuxian was filled with sadness. He looked at Healer Shi with guilty eyes: "Was it that bad?"
Healer Shi: "You were in pain but not dying. Children are just more sensitive when a strong pillar they depend on is shaken in front of them. After she eats and sleeps, she will be fine."
Wuxian sighs deeply. Wangji and Hweiru didn't deserve this type of torment. He stayed awake, diligently keeping them company until Wangji woke up.
He blinked a few times and grabbed the hand stroking his hair lazily and placed tender kisses on it before settling on sniffing his wrist.
Wuxian smiles at the clingy behavior: "Lan Zhan.."
Wangji was clearly still half asleep with his guard down: "Hmm?"
Wuxian whispers: "I'm sorry."
Wangji sits up to look directly at his soul-bond: "For what?"
Wuxian looks down, eyes filled with shame and guilt: "You don't deserve this. You have suffered because of me."
Wangji places his warm hands on Wuxian's cheeks to get his full attention: "All I care about is your happiness and health. I only wish that I can share your pain rather than just watch you shoulder it alone. Don't ever apologize to me for doing my basic soul-bond duties."
Wuxian shaky hands reach to smooth Wangji's rumbled robes: "Was she difficult to deal with?"
Wangji shakes his head: "Our daughter was afraid. She wanted you to comfort her but was afraid of aggravating your symptoms. The conflict in her mind created an impossible situation for a young child."
Wuxian's eyes water in sorrow. He rubs the sleeping girls back while whispering: "My baby.. I'm sorry.. I promise I will do better in the future.."
Someone knocks on the door. Zewu Jun and Qiren make their way in. Wangji excuses himself to go fetch food for his sick soul-bond and child, while Qiren sits on the bed near Wuxian and grabs his shaky cold hand: "Son, you have suffered this time."
Wuxian sighs: "Not really. I don't remember most of it. But she does."
Wuxian pats his daughters back as she wiggles closer to him in her sleep.
Zewu Jun sits next to the bed and smiles: "She will forget and move on with time."
Wuxian narrows his eyes at him: "I'm starting to think that patience and time is your solution to everything.."
Zewu Jun chuckles and says: "Time, patience and information. That's the sweet spot."
Wuxian tsks: "I thought you were the one with all the answers.. turns out you only have one."
Zewu Jun smirks: "It's not about diversity, it's about quality. My solution comes from experience."
Qiren waves his hand to stop them: "Stop acting like children."
Wuxian pouts: "He started it!"
Zewu Jun shakes his head, clearly amused.
Qiren taps Wuxian's hand to get his attention: "Son, how are you feeling?"
Wuxian smiles at the concern in his father's eyes: "I am well. The pain is gone. I just feel shaky and tired. Healer Shi said I will be fine once I start moving around."
Qiren nods his approval then shares a knowing look with Zewu Jun. The older brother takes a deep breath and says: "While you were sick, one of our senior disciples was able to find the odd character from the second page of the prophecy book."
Zewu Jun takes out a book from his robes and opens a marked page: "The character means: Wraith."
Wuxian takes the handed book with shaky hands and set it on his lap to read it:
'Wraith: A spirit that lives in darkness. It is said that once there was a sinful man. His crimes were so heinous that the deities didn't know how to punish his spirit after his death. They agreed to banish him into another realm within ours where he will live among the living without being able to interact with them or be part of their reality. Forever witnessing. Forever wondering without a purpose. A spirit that appears only when the sun and moon are hidden and light no longer exist. Many evil people have followed creating a new race. The deities called them the Wraith.'
Wuxian frowns when he realises that that page is the only thing they found: "That's it? How come we never heard of them before?"
Zewu Jun: "According to the book, we cannot see them or hear them. They cannot interfere with our lives or influence it in any way. The living never had a problem with them so no one ever cared to search information about them or document it."
Wuxian rubs his nose: "If we cannot see them, how can we see Biming?"
Qiren: "Our working theory is: since he is a hybrid of a living human mother and a wraith father, he somehow can transport between the two realms."
Zewu Jin nods: "This explains his ability to appear and disappear at will without talismans or spells."
Wuxian sighs: "How do we fight against a man that can move between realms?"
Qiren: "The disciples are still searching for more information about the Wraith. At least now we know what he is."
Wuxian: "That does not fill me with confidence. If anything, it makes me more wary of facing him again."
Zewu Jun places a gentle hand on his shoulder in comfort: "We will face him together when we have enough information to beat him. Have faith. The good always perseveres."
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