Chapter 12: {11}

He woke up crushed. His heart felt like a billion pieces inside of his chest and he didn’t know why. Nate opened his eyes, his room was the same, the empty desk sitting against the wall, the curtains were drawn against the window to block out light, he was lying between dark silky sheets and his head was propped up against a green pillowcase.

Green Eyes.

Brody.

It all came rushing back in half of a second, last night flashing before his eyes. The crushed and empty feeling suddenly had an explanation, and Nate wished that he had never seen those green pillows. That he could go back to sleep and ignore the fact that his entire life was in shambles.

Nate didn’t get his story, his perfect meeting, he knew that now. It seemed so insignificant when it was pushed up against the fact that Brody had practically rejected him. Yet, that was the reason that one single tear fell from his eye, sliding against the lightly tanned skin of his cheek and hitting the green pillowcase beneath him. He blinked back the other tears that threatened to follow. It was a stupid reason to cry, that was what he told himself anyway.

He rolled over, facing one of the small beside tables now. His phone lay against the table, and he reached out for it, pulling it back down into the bed with him.

A small, tiny part of him wished that the message on there would be from Brody but that wasn’t the case. The message was blunt and to the point, exactly like the person who it originated from. It read;

Camp has contacted me saying that you haven’t been attending all of your classes. You need to go to all of your classes. You are going to be a leader soon. Take it seriously son. - Dad

Nate threw the phone across the room. It hit the wall with a loud thud, another one accompanying it as the silver object crashed into the floor. Anger and frustration filled his veins. He was leaving, he couldn’t stay here now, there was no way. He couldn’t stand to see the face of the boy who rejected him every single day for the rest of the camp.

Nate got out of bed and walked over to his closet, pulling his suitcase out from the top shelf. He heard a knock on his door just as he set the suitcase on top of the unmade sheets. He tried to ignore it as he threw a pile of clothing into the bag, but the knocking just continued, echoing around the room.

In his rush, a shirt fell from his hand and landed on the floor. Nate bent down and picked it up, looking at the fabric. This was the shirt I was wearing when I met Brody, Nate thought. Nate huffed, throwing the shirt into the suitcase where he didn’t have to look at it.

Brody meant so much to him, but obviously Brody didn’t feel the same. The knowledge hit him hard, and he had to push back more tears as he continued to fill his suitcase. There was another knock on the door, but this time the small bangs were louder and close together, the person on the other side of the door obviously getting frustrated.

He eventually went and opened the door if only to make the maddening noises stop. He didn’t even bother to wait until the door was fully open before he turned back around to his closet, throwing more things into the suitcase.

‘Woah! Nate, what are you doing?’ Lucy’s panicked voice rung out, but Nate didn’t stop to answer her.

He threw more things into his bag, tugging open his drawers one by one and dumping their contents straight into his bag. Nate felt like the wasn’t even controlling his own body, anger fuelling him as he stuffed more and more into the bag. The anger was overtaking the vast and heavy hurt that seemed to radiate from his chest, and Nate needed that. He needed the anger because without it, all he would have was the hurt, and he couldn’t deal with that, so he huffed as he shoved the uncooperative clothing piles into his too small suitcase.

‘Nate! Stop! What are you doing?’ Lucy was panicking. The red headed girl was standing close to him now, but Nate refused to meet her eye line.

‘Nate!’ Lucy’s hand shot out and grabbed at Nate’s wrist, but he shook it free in an instant. ‘Come on Nate, talk to me!’ she pled, her voice getting more worrisome with each word.

‘And tell you what?’ Nate asked, slamming closed a drawer.

Lucy jumped at the sharp noise, Nate could see it out of the corner of his eye. He didn’t want to scare his friend, she hadn’t done anything wrong, but he couldn’t think about it now, he just wanted to get out.

‘Why are you packing? What’s wrong?’ Lucy asked.

‘I’m leaving.’ Nate told her, still not meeting her gaze. Nate turned back to face the drawers.

‘Why?’ Lucy asked, moving so that she was between him and the drawers, her back pressed against it.

Nate was forced to look at her now, she was standing right in front of him. He could smell her confusion and concern coming off of her in waves. He was sure that she was smelling the same thing in him, the anger and sadness that had become a deadly cocktail within his veins. Her doe eyes were wide and filled to the brim with concern when he looked at them.

Nate told her bluntly, ‘I have to go home Lucy.’

Lucy shook her head sympathetically, placing a soft hand on his upper arm in comfort, ‘Talk to me, I can help.’

‘You can’t help with this.’

‘Try me.’ Lucy insisted, her hand leaving Nate’s arm.

She looked over to the bed, and Nate followed her eye line, noticing that most of his clothes never even made it to the suitcase, most of them laying haphazardly against the dark sheets. Lucy turned and pushed the clothes out of the way, sweeping them with her hands to the side of the bed. She sat down on the sheets, gesturing for Nate to join her.

The bed bounced slightly under his weight as Nate sat on top of the sheets. He crossed his legs and rested is elbows against his thighs, looking off into the distance.

‘Why do you want to go home?’ Lucy asked, her words gentle.

Nate almost whispered, ‘I found my mate.’

‘You did?’ Lucy asked in surprise. She sounded happy, like this was the best news in the world, and it just made Nate flash back to when he was actually happy for a few moments the night before, just before Brody had metaphorically shoved his hand inside of Nate’s chest and crushed his heart without mercy. ‘When did you find your mate?’ she asked.

‘Last night, on the full moon,’ Nate admitted, biting at his lip.

‘How?’ Lucy asked in confusion, her happy tone changing. ‘How could you find your mate? It’s only Alpha’s here. Did you sneak off campus?’

‘Nope.’

‘Then how?’

I don’t know why, but I’m mated to an Alpha,’ Nate admitted in almost awe himself at what he was saying.

Lucy gently clasped his arm with her hands, making him face her. She looked utterly confused.

‘How is that possible?,’ she asked in wonder. ‘Who is your mate?’ her tone was as calm as Nate assumed she could muster, but there was worry in the undertones of her words.

‘Brody.’

‘Brody?’ Lucy gasped, her eyes widened.

Nate’s eyes flickered from Lucy to his fidgeting hands. ‘I have no idea how it happened, I always thought that it would be a nice girl with big eyes who I would bring home to my parents. I imagined her cooking dinner with my mum and talking about wedding plans, I never even considered something like this.’

‘Are you disappointed?’ Lucy asked, and Nate could hear the fear in her voice at what she was asking. There were questioned that hid behind what she was saying, questions of rejection. Even the mere word was enough to send uncomfortable shivers down Nate’s spine.

‘Can I tell you a secret?’ Nate asked.

Lucy nodded warily.

‘When I first figured it out, when the word mate started swirling around my head and when I felt that it was him, I wasn’t disappointed one bit,’ he told her in almost awe. ‘I was relieved.’

Lucy smiled a little, hope coming into her face, ‘What do you mean?’

Nate smiled back, his eyes brightening just a little, ‘I knew that he was my mate and it was like my world clicked into place and I was so, so happy. I cared about Brody way before then, but in that one moment I could feel everything strengthening and I knew that it was right. I wanted to be with him, not just because we were mates, but because he was….well, he was just Brody. My Brody.’

Lucy’s smile widened, ‘You liked him before you knew you were mates, didn’t you?’

Nate thought back to all those times that he had stared at his friend for a little too long, or the way that his hand would unconsciously linger on Brody’s arm as they spoke, and he realised that he had liked Brody unconsciously probably since they had first met. He nodded shyly, ‘Yeah, I think so.’

‘It should be impossible,’ Lucy told him in awe, that smile still plastered into her lips. ‘Yet, somehow this is what was supposed to happen. The Moon Gods don’t make mistakes.’

‘Brody thinks that they do.’

With those few simple words, the entire mood in the room dropped and the pressure of the following silence seemed to lean heavily against Nate’s chest.

‘And that’s why you want to leave?’ Lucy suggested.

‘He thinks we are a mistake. He doesn’t want to believe it and I don’t know what to do,’ Nate admitted, his voice in a tone that showed too much vulnerability for his liking.

Lucy’s eyes softened and she brought up her hand, which she placed against the skin of his cheek, rubbing her thumb over the skin. ‘He could have rejected you last night, but he didn’t and there must have been a reason for that. He’s apart of you, every cell of yours is now connected with his, and there’s no way that his is any different. He feels for you, but he is scared, just like you are.’

Nate turned his face away from her hold and she dropped her hand. ‘He doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want me.’ He told her in a heartbroken voice.

‘Nate-’

‘Lucy, mates are supposed to do things together, they are supposed to be perfect. Brody basically rejected me last night, he doesn’t care about me!’

Lucy shook her head, ‘He cares about you Nate, and not just because you are mates. I know that you can see that. He is scared, and who can blame him? There haven’t been two male Alpha’s in the entire werewolf history, that I know of anyway. Who wouldn’t be scared?’

Nate nodded. She had a point. The things that Brody had said the night before still cut deep into Nate’s heart, but if there was a chance that Brody really did care for him, then he wasn’t going to run away.

Nate looked up at Lucy with a new determination in his eyes, ‘I have to make things right. I have to find him.’

‘Good,’ she stated. Lucy then looked at the mess at the side of the bed, ‘first clean up this room. You aren’t going anywhere, so pack those clothes back where they belong.’

‘I will,’ Nate assured her. ‘Thank-you for talking some sense into me.’

‘Not a problem.’ Lucy stood from the bed. ‘Breakfast is soon, you will see him then.’

Nate nodded, but the worry didn’t leave his face.

Lucy looked him dead in the eyes, ‘The Moon God’s don’t make mistakes. Everything will work out.’

God, Nate hoped so.