Chapter 19: the weight of waiting

a journey in my own skinWords: 722

There is a weight in waiting,

a quiet ache in wondering

whether I am enough,

whether I am the man they see,

or if I am still caught in the blur

of someone else's mirror.

I spend too many nights

thinking of the love I've yet to receive,

not because it isn't offered,

but because it feels too fragile,

too new,

too much like I don't deserve it,

like my hands

still tremble when they reach for something

I've always wanted but never believed was mine.

But then, in the soft glow of morning,

they hold me

like I've always been the one they've wanted,

and for a moment,

the waiting stops.

There's no past

no future

just the steady rhythm of breath

and the tenderness of love

finding a way

to wrap itself around me

just as I am.