Chapter 18: Broken Bonds: Chapter 17

The text from Gabe wakes me up at five in the morning and my head is still full of and and . I drink some water because I refuse to believe this is a hangover and dehydration must be to blame instead.

After yesterday, I can’t bring myself to be angry at being woken up by him, but I’m still not excited about being around Gabe this early in the damn morning without even a goddamn reason.

He’d walked me up to my room after the party last night, seeing me safely to my door and not judging me for groaning and stumbling up the stairs, so I think we’ve found a real peace agreement, like now that I’ve proved myself by lying and covering for him, he’s actually going to give this friendship a real go and stop lashing out at me every second he gets.

I get dressed in casual clothes because nothing on campus is open except the dining hall at this time in the morning so it’s not like I’ll need to impress anyone down there. I take notice again at the way my shirt is billowing on me now I’ve toned up a lot and I really, need to find an income to get some new shit.

I can’t even show off all my hard work, dammit.

I stomp down the stairs, making enough noise to wake the entire building up because they’re all gossiping bitches anyway so no skin off of my nose if I ruin their last sleep-in of spring break. I get to the front of the building at the same time as Gabe does, bouncing straight over to his motorbike when he holds out his spare helmet.

I’ve become a pro at getting it strapped on right and swinging onto the bike behind him so in under a minute, we’re flying down the road with a roar of the engine. The morning sun is bright already in the sky, but the chill of the early morning is still biting into the bare skin of my hands where they’re wrapped around his waist. When we finally pull up in front of the TT center, Gabe kills the engine and holds his arm out so I can climb off without landing on my ass.

It’s not where I was expecting to end up but Gabe has a key to get in and leads the way, turning lights on and ducking into the guy’s locker room to grab out his bag. I duck into the ladies to do the same, the new pair of sneakers that magically appeared after the bloodbath of the maze still shiny and white, where I’ve only worn them once.

I didn’t realize the college had a budget to replace damaged items but I guess Draven charges a shitload of money for tuition for a reason.

Gabe grins at me as I join him, looking way too freaking perky and I drawl, “You got me out of my dorms at the crack of dawn, before my curfew lifts, to work out? How did you get this past North’s obsession with keeping me locked up?”

Gabe grins at the rough, gravelly tone of my voice as he slings his bag down on the ground by the wall and strips out of his shirt. I do everything in my power not to watch the rippling of his insane muscles but I’m only human, and fuck, he really is too hot for words.

Fuck. Nope, I need to stop looking before my bond comes out to play.

“North didn’t enroll you into TT as a way to torture you, no matter how badly you want to believe that. Bonds are being taken off of the streets by the Resistance everyday. The ones we hear about aren’t even of the actual cases. You need to know how to defend yourself, especially since you don’t have a gift of your own to use. You’re doing well in TT, but we haven’t actually covered anything about self defense yet and when I told North that I’m going to help you to train and workout, he agreed you need all the help you can get.”

Ouch.

I mean, it’s true but that doesn’t mean those words coming out of that mouth don’t hurt. Especially when he’s standing there shirtless as he rifles through his bag for something. God, even his back is tightly muscled, how the hell do you even get that ripped at our age? Doesn’t that kind of shit take time? Maybe the shifter genes do it for him and, God, am I enjoying the fruits of it.

‘You’re drooling,’ Gabe says, smugness dripping from every syllable, and there’s something about this moment that makes it safe to flirt back just a little.

I know I look nothing like the perfectly toned and perky girls in this class but I’ve been shown enough interest in the past to know I’m not a complete hag. When I drop my bag down next to his and pull my shirt over my head, leaving me in just my sports bra, I make a show of bending over to dig my workout tank out of my bag.

He makes a strangled noise and then stops breathing.

I have to swallow the gloating cheer that works its way up my throat and when I pull the tank over my head, I arch my back a little more than necessary, my tits looking perkier than usual.

“That’s just fucking mean. I’m here to help you and you’re the one that took sex off of the table,” Gabe chokes out, grabbing his water bottle and stalking over to one of the weight machines.

I snicker out a laugh, sounding like a depraved idiot, but too tired and smug to care about how I look to him right now. “I play to win, you should learn that lesson now before it bites you in the ass.”

He shrugs and starts setting the machine up for me. “You’ve done enough damage that I’m bulletproof now, Fallows. What’s the most you can bench now?”

Dammit.

I have to ignore his jab at me and I force my voice to be even as I reply, “Five pounds.”

He rolls his eyes at me and then shoots me a glare. “I know you’re being a brat right now but if we have to start at five, this is going to go on forever. You’ll never get out of here.”

I mean, I wasn’t actually joking, but I don’t argue with him when he adds twenty pounds on and then jerks his head at me to get started. I take my time, mostly to mess with him, but also because I have no idea if I can actually do this.

Half an hour later I decide that I’d rather just die.

I would rather lay down and die if the Resistance comes after me because there’s nothing in the world that could be worse than all of this working out. Fuck, and to think that I’d thought Vivian’s training circuit was bad. Gabe puts him to utter shame and I start to regret ever extending that stupid fucking olive branch to him.

This is how he’s punishing me for leaving them.

“I’m not doing anything else. If you attempt to put me on another machine, I’ll scream murder and run out of here. I’m going to the police, the non-Gifted will definitely help me escape this kind of abuse.”

Gabe rolls his eyes at my dramatics, and even though he’s also sweating at the workout, his voice comes out steady and with none of the panting I’m doing, “You can bitch Gryphon out for this later if you hate it, he’s the one who set the reps. He seemed to think you could handle it, but I guess I can call him and tell him you bitched out.”

Fuck.

Goddammit, he’s figured out how to play me like a fucking fiddle because that shit is a red flag being waved at me and instantly I’m back to lifting weights and hoping to die. It takes every distraction technique I’ve ever learned to get through it but I last the entire hour, my body collapsing on the mats the moment he mutters that we’re done.

“I’m not carrying you back to the dorms so you better pull yourself together, Bond.”

I curse him out but it comes out a garbled mess of groans and panting that he just laughs at. There’s no way I’m ever moving again so I just accept that I live here now, in this exact spot on the mats. I really need to change out of my gross, sweaty clothes, but my bag is at least four feet away from me and I almost cry at the very thought of getting over to it by myself. Gabe huffs at my whimpering and slings the bag over to me on his way through to the guy’s locker room. I hear the shower cut on and I guess I have about ten minutes to heave myself off of the ground.

I need every second I can get.

I DECIDE that being friends with Gabe might end up harder than it’s worth if he insists on making me train every morning, but once I finally scrape myself off of the ground, he takes us over to the dining hall and we eat together in a pleasant sort of silence that neither of us want to break.

It’s shocking to me how many students know and love him, and I spend half the time we’re eating being introduced to someone new who’s stopped past the table to talk to Gabe about some sporting bullshit. I’m polite but not friendly because, honestly, my circle is already looking a little too big for my liking. I was happy with just Sage but now there’s Sawyer and Felix and Gabe and, , Atlas, whose messages are still the first thing I see when I wake up and the last thing I read before I fall asleep every night.

I can’t afford to have all of these people to miss when I leave them behind.

I make excuses to Gabe about needing to get assignments finished and he walks me back to my dorm without questioning the sudden shift in my mood. When I get back to my room, I text Sage and Atlas with the same story about studying and then I spend the rest of the day messing around on my phone and trying not to lose my goddamn mind over being trapped here with all of these people I’m starting to… need. Fuck, I need them all. I need their friendships like nothing ever before and I’m completely screwed.

I finally force myself into cracking open my textbooks in the afternoon and then I crawl into bed when my eyes feel as though they’re bleeding around midnight.

I’m woken at four in the morning by my phone ringing.

I ignore it, because fuck whichever one of my Bonds is trying to ruin my week by waking me the hell up right now. I roll back over on the shitty, tiny bed and then shove a pillow over my head when the phone starts ringing again. I know better than to ignore it, I know they wouldn’t be fucking with me like this and there’s probably something major going on, but after the training with Gabe yesterday, I’m freaking exhausted.

The thumping on my door that starts ten minutes later isn’t as easy to ignore.

I might murder whoever the fuck is here.

I spring out of the bed and rip the door open, ready to spill some goddamn blood, only to find Gabe standing there, panting and freaking the fuck out. I forget my fury at the wake-up as I take him in. He’s wearing nothing but a pair of basketball shorts, every inch of his golden skin gleaming in the glow of my shitty bedside lamp.

He’s freaking magnificent.

A few of the doors down the hallway open, scowling girls popping their heads out to glare at me like it’s my fault Gabe has shown up like a raging goddamn bull in a china shop at the ass crack of dawn.

“Where’s your phone? Why the hell didn’t you answer it?” Gabe croaks but I’m too busy trying to restart my now very broken brain to reply, all of my usual sass and sarcasm just freaking gone thanks to the sight of him, and as he brushes past me to stalk into my room, I notice his bare feet. My brain might not be at full function but something does click for me.

He shifted and ran here.

“What’s happened? Fuck, Gabe, what the hell is going on?” I shut the door and lean back against it, trying desperately not to look at him as he paces around, eyeing everything like he’s expecting to have to defend us both against an entire freaking army that’s lying in wait behind my shitty, cracked mirror.

“Twelve Gifted were taken tonight. Three of them were from this building, heading back from a party and taken outside. North said your GPS hadn’t moved but… I had to check for myself.”

Fuck.

. This is getting out of hand, if they don’t let me go soon then I’m going to be caught and that’ll be the end of everything. The fear has me snapping at him, “I don’t need a fucking babysitter!”

He spins back around to snarl at me, “Then answer your phone!”

I’m more open than I would normally be because it’s actually too freaking sweet to think he ran the whole way here just because I didn’t answer my phone, but I’m still freaking the hell out over having friends and ties holding me here. “You just said North checked the GPS, there’s no reason for you to be rushing over here and waking the whole goddamn building up!”

His eyes narrow at me and then his chest heaves as he takes a deep, calming breath, the type that probably means he’s trying to find a little patience to deal with my bullshit. “You said we were friends… well, this is what friends do, Oli. When you didn’t answer the phone I had to be sure that you weren’t taken. This is what friendship with me looks like, take it or leave it.”

I have no choice but to take it because I’m so fucking tired of arguing with him. I can’t change our situation, and I definitely can’t let my guard down around him, but all of the fight in me that I usually have for him is just gone.

“Okay. Alright, fine, now you know I’m alive and I promise I’ll answer my stupid phone next time. Go home and let me get a few more hours of sleep in.”

I slump down onto my bed, finally realizing that I’m wearing nothing but a pair of ratty old shorts and a tank, but Gabe hasn’t noticed or commented on exactly how homeless I look, thank God. I lay back against the terrible pillow and attempt to get comfortable but it’s impossible to do with the way he’s just standing there watching me like I’m so fucking interesting here in my shitty room with absolutely nothing personal. Not even a decent set of sheets or a blanket.

I give him a look which he completely ignores as he slides down onto the floor, his back pressed against the door and his eyes glowing in the darkness just a little, the only proof that he’s struggling with his gift at the moment.

I really can’t be fucked fighting with him, my voice wrung out and exhausted, “I’m still tired, Gabe, please just leave me to sleep.”

He shrugs and glances away to look out the tiny, grimy window. “I’m not leaving you alone here while there’s fucking Resistance snatching people. Just go to sleep and in the morning I’ll head over to the dining hall with you before class.”

I huff and pull the blanket up to my chin but it’s too freaking weird to attempt to sleep with him sitting there so I give up before I really give it a try. “What’s the Council doing about this? You can’t tell me they’re just sitting around letting people be kidnapped.”

I hear Gabe exhale in a long stream but I keep my eyes on the ceiling. “Some of them want to do exactly that. They’re too fucking gutless to form a plan and go after them, spouting some bullshit about higher ground and keeping the peace.”

Fuck that, there’s no such thing as higher ground when it comes to these people. They’ll take any weakness or show of morality and they’ll use it to destroy you.

I know this for a fact.

“And what does North think about it? What’s he doing for the community with all of that money and power of his?” My voice is scathing and Gabe doesn’t answer me for a minute, the room settling into a charged silence that’s full of all of our secrets.

My phone buzzes under my pillow and, without thinking, I pull it out to see Atlas’ message.

I swallow because I really don’t want him to come. He’s the tiny bit of joy that I allow myself because of the distance between us. If he shows up, then I’ll have to put that same distance between us that I have with the others and that feels fucking devastating to me right now.

“Whose phone is that?”

Fuck.

I drop it down onto the covers but there’s no use hiding it now, Gabe’s seen it and realized it’s definitely not the older model iPhone that North had given me. Nope, it’s the shiny and brand new one that Atlas had couriered to me. It’s on his phone plan and I allow myself to accept that from him because he’s the only one I ever message on it.

“Oli, where the fuck did you get that?”

I roll my eyes and then turn my back on him because he’s once again proving to me that they all think they own me and have a right to take away every last one of my freedoms. “Atlas sent it to me, now run along to snitch on me to North like the good little lapdog you are.”

There’s silence again and then he mutters quietly, “Fuck, you’re a bitch, Fallows.”

He still doesn’t move to get up and eventually sleep claims me.