â**Chapter 1**â
Present
â¢Madison
"I now pronounce you husband and wife." The priest declares that my future is now tied to this man, who's always wearing his blank expression.
I know there's no reason to be happy about this, even for me, but this is his wedding too. Can he at least show the guest that he is somehow happy, even just a fake one? That's all I want.
As a woman, Of course I want to have my dream wedding, and I'm sure to myself that I'm not happy about this. Especially when my groom is looking like he's attending the lamest meeting he has ever attended. There's no way I can be that quiet. It's only been an hour since I first met himâafter being engaged for 5 yearsâ and I already know how silence can be too loud for me.
"You may now kiss the bride." With that being said, my heart started beating uncontrollably wondering what am I supposed to do, or he's the one who's going to take the first move.
Without waiting for him, I tiptoed on my heels while my hands gently held his arms to keep my balance, tipping my chin up as I planted a quick kiss on the side of his lips.
That's better than nothing, right? I guess?
I was about to let go of him when his soft hands cupped my face and pulled me into a real kiss. Like how married couples do it in movies and real life. A quick but deep kiss.
After hearing the applause of the guests, he pulled away to face them. Like what he did, I also smiled at them when I suddenly felt his arms around my waist. I admit I was startled by him, and he's aware of it.
Seeing my Dada and Zane around somehow managed to erase the thought of running away from this. Ivan didn't make it because there's been some emergency with our company in London. But I still wish he was here though. In the other table which I assumed is for his family side, his sister, his father and his mother, whom I notice has been glaring at me the whole ceremony.
But my mind is occupied by this man at my side, my husband. Does he hate this so much, like I do? If Yes, then why did he not cancel this? If No, then why is he acting like this?, like he's going to murder whoever thought of this bullshit.
He should even be thankful that his wife is pretty like me, I know it's not the right time to joke, but for real. In those five years, It never slipped my mind that my fiancé is this handsome even with that bored face, with a body that is perfectly fit with the perfectly tailored suit. Almost everything in him was perfect except his smile, it's missing, so I can't say if it's perfect too.
Because by how concerned Liam is, I thought it might be some old man with a big beer belly and itchy beard. He's older than me too but not as I expected, like a man in his forties or fifties, but he's still older than me by seven years.
And like my Dada said, They'll only let me have the company if I get married before I turn twenty-five. And lucky me, I got married 5 months before my birthday. And I know he's also doing this for their company, so it's a win-win situation.
Except for the fact that we got married.
I just hope things will get better.
***
We just got to his villa and not going to lie, this is so luxurious.
I'm going insane.
Right where I'm standing, You'll be able to see how huge his villa is.
The main house has two palm trees in the middle before you get in the main door. Around ten meters away from the outside living space, the huge pool will greet you, it's made of dark gray marble. On the left side of the pool you will see some looking expensive chaise lounge for outdoor and on the right side is like a drinking area with no roof patio dug down on the sideâleveled by the bottom of the poolâ and if you walk a little right from the patio, there's another patio with a roof.
Hearing him walk out of the car, my attention went to the open garage just next to the house. With three cars, one of it is a cabrioleâa blue Lamborghini Aventador S Roadster, a black Bugatti La Voiture Noire and a blue Pagani Zonda HP Barchettaâ, three pick up truckâa black Dartz Prombron, a black Terradyne Gurkha Pickup and a white Lamborghini LM002â, two SUVâa black Rolls-Royce Cullinan and a gray Bentley Bentayga Speedâ in it, and two big bike.
For the record, he's living here alone.
"Let's get in." He said walking to me to get the bag in my hands, as we walked inside the house. I almost collapsed.
What the hell.
The glass wall where you can see the whole outdoors is just insane. Everything here is so perfect, the enormous L-shaped gray sofa with matching gray carpet underneath. The marble wall that connects the first and second floor is now full of books and vases, and if you look on the other side of the house, there's another set of white-carameled themed living rooms. The stair is made of marble tiles and glass as its railings are right in front of it.
"Take a seat, I'll go get you water."
Nodding at him as I waited for him, he didn't take too long before coming back. Giving me the glass of water as he sat next to me. And from where we are sitting right now, You can see a huge flat screen TV with console games on the bracket beside it. Then If you look up, you'll be able to see a gigantic chandelier, it's too big, but the light is dimmed. It's warm. As a man, I didn't expect him to have some vase inside his house, but he did, with a gold vase. Behind us is the dining table.
I like that it's not too bright nor too dark here. It's warm and cozy.
My thoughts got interrupted when he put his glass down and looked at his watch.
"It's already late, You should sleep now."
But where?
Beside him?
Did he prepare another room for me?
I think my silence gives him an idea of what I'm thinking right now, as he added. "The spare room is under renovation, you can sleep in my room if you like"
"And you?"
"I can sleep here on the couch. I understand that you're still not comfortable around me and don't worry I'm not going to pressure you"
Giving him an understanding nod as I stated. "You can sleep there, I don't mind. Besides, you're my husband now, so I think there's uhmâ nothing wrong, right?"
He looked surprised by my response, but nodded.
"And also, anytime soon it'll happen too, so why not now?"
"You have a point there, I'm not actually used to sleeping on the couch" He admitted, making my jaw drop at his ridiculousness. "What?"
A chuckle escapes me when I look at his confused face. "Still, I appreciated the urge to recommend it."
"Welcome. Would you like something to eat before going to sleep?"
"You know how to cook?" I ask, but he immediately shakes his head like a little kid, this time I burst out laughing.
"I didn't say I'm going to cook so if you please, stop laughing"
"Then why are you asking me like you're going to cook something special for me?" getting up from my seat as I took my bag and looked for something I can change to. I'm still wearing the simple but elegant cream-silk dress that's hugging my curves with a slit up until my thighs.
"I asked my sister to buy you some clothes while Zane is packing your things from your apartment, I already put it in the closet in our room... There are some pajamas there if you want to change"
Our room.
"I'll just take a bath, then I'll cook something"
â¢Ace
Seeing her walking on the aisle is one of the scenes I won't get tired of watching again and again. Even though I didn't know her.
She looks breathtaking, like having a bruise on her white skin would be a mistake. After the event, we had some pictures as her Grandpa wanted. Together with my sister and her brother, we don't really have any guests other than some friends, and our families. I still remember my sister's exact words when she came to me and congratulated us.
"Let my sister-in-law walk, I know you'll make beautiful babies but wait for the right time, keep your dick in your pants' bro. By the way, Congrats."
The photographer emailed me the pictures from earlier and while I'm waiting for her, I click to the files and look at the pictures. Her smile was pretty from every picture, even though she's forced into this.
In the last folder of the file, which has our pictures, only the two of us, I look through the images one by one. Now I know why she felt awkward with me earlier, I didn't mean to look like I was having the worst day of my life, but that's what my face is showing. In the last picture, which is our wedding picture, she's standing next to me, hands wrapped around my arms, having the most smile on her face while looking at me, I was looking back at her with a small smile on my lips. That's because Zane made a joke about me being thankful that I'll have a wife who will scold me.
My smile immediately dropped when I heard a scream followed by a loud thud from our room. Shutting my laptop down on the couch as I hurriedly ran to our room.
When I got there she just got out of the bathroom, towel still wrapped around her while her hair was dripping wet. She looked up at me and smiled, but that didn't help when I saw her limping and her free hands holding her knees as she tried to walk.
"What the hell happened?" Striding over her as I held her arms to keep her up.
"I was trying to dry my feet when the rug suddenly slipped" she just chuckled while gently massaging her knees.
"You should have been careful" I said softly, not trying to scare her, carrying her in my arms as I walked to the bed and slowly put her down.
Opening the cabinet of the bedside to take the ointment I used when I had a muscle cramp, thankfully it's still here.
"Does anywhere else hurt?" Gently holding her arms, at the moment I catch a glimpse of a large dark bruise on her arm. It looks like she fell badly.
"I guess it's just my knees"
I can feel her gaze at me the whole time that I applied some ointment on her bruised knees. Her skin was so soft, like it'll be a sin if you tried to hurt her physically.
"It's not really a big deal, I can still walk" she tried to stand up, but I held her hands and pulled her back to the bed.
"Your hair, You need to dry it. And you also... need to get dressed"
"Oh yeah" She smiled at me awkwardly and hurriedly walked back to the bathroom.
"Be careful, no need to hurry" I shouted as I sat at the bed and just waited for her to finish.
She changed into a pair of maroon silk sleepwear. Shorts that reveal her soft skin and a camisole. There's something about her and silk.
"How did you learn to cook?" I asked curiously while watching her move around the kitchen.
Maybe having a wife who knows how to cook was one of my dreams when I was a kid just because I thought I'll always have delicious meals, but that is me as a kid. But now that my wife is cooking for us on our first night, it feels like a dream, she's a dream.
"Because I live alone?" she saidâ her voice with a taint of confusion too.
"I live alone too." I countered the explanation, which had her grinning.
"Because I like eating? Like my Dada said, if you like to eat, you should also know how to cook''. She took the strainer from the cabinet and walked back to the sink. "Can you help me with that?" tipping her chin toward the noodles as I walk beside her and help her strain the noodle from the boiling water and put it in a bowl with cold water.
"Mama said it's better to use dry pasta for lasagna, but I always want to be different from the plain one. I love making things in my way..." She smiled at her own silliness. "That's why I boiled it first, I know that a lot of them also boil it first, but as I said I love making things my way. I tried to put some twist to my lasagna because I want to overcome Mama's lasagna. It's the best of the best" Looking down as she tried to hold her emotion.
"Where is she now?" I know she's talking about her grandma because she died when she was just nine. After knowing Zane for five years, in some ways I know her.
"She died three months before my eighteenth birthday. It's sad because she's been the one who always wanted me to have a party, but she's not there." emotions filled her airy breath, to my surprise my hands went to her arms making her look at me startled, but her eyes twinkle as she smiled.
"Why don't you try to smile to make me feel better?"
That's when I realized what I am doing.
I do want to make her feel better, but...
Instantly moving away from her as I walk to the fridge, "Let's finish this, I'm hungry".
â¢Madison
"I talked to Zane earlier," he said while placing our food on the table"He said you have experience as a secretary, so I thought maybe you can work with me for the meantime. While you're waiting, he told me that you wanted to work for my company?"
Taking the seat in front of him, I nodded, "If there's an available one, even just in the Marketing Department. I still have five months to learn the things I didn't know"
He just looked at me, making me realize that maybe he doesn't want me there, of course that's one of the biggest companies here in New York and hiring someone who doesn't have any experience will be the last thing they would do.
"But it's okay if there's none, I actually asked this to Zane. I didn't expect him to bother you with this" shrugging my shoulder as I dig in my food.
He seems to think about it before also digging in. "You can be my secretary, my secretary is taking paternity leave."
"That's nice, but let me tell you this. I don't really know anythingâ"
"I'll guide you, don't worry" his reassuring words butt in.
"Uhm... Okay... Thank you" I said while grinning at him, but he just nodded and continued eating.
He didn't even tell me if the food was good.
"Get ready tomorrow by six, we need to get to the company by seven"
"Can I ask you something?" curiousness filled my voice. I take his small nod as a signal to continue. "I know that in these five years, you're well aware that you're engaged to someone, right?"
"You can say that".
"Did you expect your wife to be this pretty?" I said, trying hard not to laugh at his expression.
"I do" he said honestly, waiting for him to continue, he sipped on his water and stated. "Because Grandpa is always talking about you, how beautiful you are, how smart you are, how humble yet fierce you are. And my Grandpa is frank, strictly frank. He won't lie about you just to have me agree to that engagement."
His answer made me grin at him. "What?" resting his arm on the table as he leaned a little closer.
"Aren't you going to ask me the same?"
"Why? Did you expect me to be some old-horny guy with a huge potbelly who knows nothing other than ogling a teenage girl who's wearing a skirt?"
Biting my inner cheeks to prevent my laugh from bursting out when his eyes narrowed.
"Okay, I'm sorry. I admit I thought you'd be like...that"
"Are you happy, then?" Putting his fork down as he reaches for the tissues.
"Happy for?"
"That I'm a polar of your expectations."
"Grateful, I prefer the word Grateful." grinning at him when his phone suddenly rings, grabbing his attention.
He takes a look at the Caller ID, meeting his eyes when I look up from his phone, he's already looking at me. I know that look.
"Go on, take it" I hope he didn't notice the awkwardness in my voice.
He gave me a simple nod and headed off to the living room, when I heard his steps fading I continued to eat my dinner.
Without any lie, It never crosses my mind that he'll ignore it just to have a boring conversation with me. Work is his middle name.
It's already been half an hour, but he's still not coming back from his call. I tried to call for him, however, silence in the living room is what I heard. Standing up from my seat as I decided to check on him.
There's no one in the living room.
I ran upstairs to his office, there's no one there
Our bedroomâ As soon as I opened the door, the cold breeze from the open balcony hit my face, making me shiver. The room was somehow lightened by the light from the moon. Looking around the room with my mind starting to fill with unnecessary thoughts.
Maybe he just used that excuse, so he can leave without hurting my feelings.
But he can tell me so. I won't stop him.
Or maybeâ
Closing my eyes tightly as I listen to the raindrops coming from outside the balcony, helping me push that thought away. Overthinking is one of the most toxic traits I have, that even I hated.
But if I have something I hate the most, it's rain.
It feels so lonely, dark, pathetic... pitiful.
Walking to the balcony, I slam the door shut and run back to the living room.
All lights turned on, my blanket and pillow on the couch, my kindle and headset. I have everything I need, but my emotions are still on its way to break me down. Cuddling myself on the couch while listening to some loud music as I shut my eyes, not letting the tears come out.
"Sweetheart, no matter what happens, what you hear, don't come out of this closet okay?" Fear is the only thing I can understand from Mom's voice.
"But Mom-"
"Listen to me, your brother will be here in an hour. If I'm not back yet before they come here, tell them that you need to go to Dada's house, do you understand Madison?"
Forcing myself to nod, she kisses my forehead before closing the closet and walking away. Leaving me hidden in Zane's closet.
As a nine years old kid, my thoughts start to fill with unnecessary thoughts. When I saw the tears in Mom's eyes, I knew something was wrong.
Covering my mouth with my trembling hands to stop my sobs, I close my eyes and pray that Liam will get here quickly. Because I saw the guys, and they have guns. I tried to somehow calm myself and erase the thoughts that she might die out there.
My messed up sniffles, dark room with only light from the moon outside the window and the sound of rain hitting the window is the only thing I can notice for now.
After some minutes of hearing only the rain, a loud gunshot was heard making me flinch.
"M-mom"
Still having some consciousness left, raising the headphone's volume to the loudest it can be as I take a deep breath.
****
Ace
I really felt bad for leaving her without letting her know, she needs to know, as she's my wife. It's just a fucking emergency to the company, I'll just apologize tomorrow.
While entering the house's passcode, I take a look at my watch to check the time. 2:46. It's already been six hours since I left, and it's already late, she must be asleep by now. When I opened the door, the bright light from the chandelier greeted me.
Why is this still on?
Removing my nearly drenched suit as I look around the living room only to notice a peak of a blanket on the couch.
"Madison?"
Walking towards the couch as I waited for her to respond, but she didn't. Standing next to her, only to see her already asleep.
Why is she sleeping here?
And why is she wearing headphones while sleeping?
Crouching beside her as I stare at her sleeping face. Bringing my hands up to caress her cheeks when I notice some dried tears on her face.
Carefully removing her headphone and kindle away, I fix her blanket and gently pick carry her in my arms, not wanting to wake her up.
Quietly stepping in our room as I gently put her down and tuck her in.
Somehow seeing her like this didn't give me a nice feeling, there's an urge in me that's wanting to know her more. But it'll take time, and I'm willing to wait.
I know I'm not the kind of man that every woman wants, but it's different now. Even if I don't want to be good enough for her, I need to. Because that's what this marriage is for, aside from the company. That regretting this marriage, regretting me, will never cross her mind.
My hands went to hold her and touch her wedding band. It fits perfectly on her. Caressing her soft hands as I planted a soft kiss on it. Leaning closer to her as I kiss her forehead and tuck her comfortably.
Stepping in our walk-in closet as I took a pair of pajamas and a shirt.
Taking a warm bath is the thing I think would help to make me feel at ease. After all what happened today, It's just too good to be true.
When I went to the office earlier, Dad called me to see her and congratulate us. He even told me what to do and not to do. My Dad is divorce with Mom, and he now has his own family. That's why he didn't manage to come to our wedding today. But he promised that he'll come home next month to meet her.
Earlier, when she was walking on the aisle, without anyone on her side. I can feel that she's longing for someone. And if Dad happens to be there earlier, I would have asked him to walk her there. Even though neither of us wanted this, just like other women, I know she has her dream wedding.
I start to feel guilty for not even asking or trying to get in touch with her in those five years. I could have done that, but I didn't.
As I finished taking a bath, drying my hair using a towel, I walked towards the bedside and took my laptop.
Sitting on my bedside when I notice that she's sweating, but the ac is on, and it's raining. It's not even that hot. I put my laptop on my lap and lean to her to check if she's alright, putting my palm on her forehead when she lets out a groan and heavily opens her eyes.
"Are you okay?" I ask while slowly pulling away.
"What happened?"
"You're sweating, Are you okay? Are you having a nightmare?"
She seems to think of it before tiredly smiling. "I guess so."
Not having anything to say I let out a simple nod, she turned around back facing me while hugging a pillow between her legs. Trying to focus on what I should do, I lean my back on the headboard and open my laptop to finish my undone work that I couldn't finish earlier.
An hour passed when I heard her groaning again. She's been like that for the past one hour. Not intentionally trying to wake her up, I bring my hand to her hair and gently caress it, thinking it might help her.
Her hair is so soft and the smell of it makes me want to snuggle my nose on the crook of her neck just to sniff it.
Gently stroking her hair, I can hear her calming down, and the tired groans earlier are now gone too. She's already fallen asleep.
I was about to pull back when she suddenly turned to face me again and wrap her arms on my waist, snuggling her head on top of my chest, which caught me off guard. My mind went blank, and I can't even think what I should do. But it's normal, right? No need to feel awkward when your wife hugged you.
Trying to convince myself that it's normal and there's nothing wrong, I snaked my arms on her back to pull her closer. Deciding to put my laptop aside and also take a nap since I also need it, I lay on my back and start to caress her soft hair.
I was on the edge of drifting to sleep when I heard my phone ringing. Reaching my hand over the bedside table where my phone is making a noise that for sure will wake her up. Looking at the Caller Name as I curse under my breath.
The one and only Zane Grey...
Why the fuck would he even call at this hour?
Resentfully taking off her arms on me, I answer the call and walk to the balcony. Closing the glass door behind me as I put the phone to my ear.
"What the actual fuck, Zane? Do you have any idea what time it is now?"
Chuckled muffled on the other side as my brows narrowed.
"I just thought maybe you two are doing something, then now would be the perfect time to call since you two should be finished at your exercise by now." he said teasingly, and I can see that playful smirk on his face he's making on the other line by now.
"Stop your dirty imagination, Why did you call?"
"How's she? Is she sleeping well?"
It's like his brotherly side felt what's happening to her, asking that out of nowhere in the middle of the night. Peering over my back as I look at her sleeping figure. She looks so small on my bed, my comforter comfortably hugging her body, with the dim lights from the lamp hitting her face. Looking like the spotlight is on her.
My thoughts break off when the cold breeze from the rain hits my face.
"She's already sleeping, but I think she's having a nightmare. She's been like that for the past few hours. She can't seem to sleep" I said while leaning against the railings.
"I don't know if she told you this, but it's obvious that she hasn't. She has Ombrophobia, If you look into her bag you'll see her pills and her medicine. She won't really have a proper sleep without taking her."
Waiting for him to tell me more about this phobia of hers, he takes my silence as a sign to continue.
"I can't really say anything to you, if she wants to tell you anything about this, then she will. I'm not in the position to say anything. But as I said, She needs to drink her medicine, and just stay by her side. You might think she's overreacting with a simple rain, but trust me, she had worse than you can expect."
"She's afraid of the rain? Have you ever tried taking her to the doctor? Isn't that something you should be worried about?"
"They said, she can only overcome it if she managed to forget or accept it. You just need to give her medicine and stay beside, That's all. I need to hang up now, Just tell her I miss her. Bye."
"Yeah"
As he ended the call. I walked back to our room and went straight to her to see if she went back to sleep when I left or not.
She's asleep, but still sweating.
I don't want to wake her up, she just get to fall asleep no