Chapter 20: The Writing Is on the Wall

Grace

I need assistance

Belle

You’re still in NY right? Ping me your location and I’m there.

Grace

Done. You’re never going to believe the pickle I’m in.

Belle

If it’s to do with that sexy CEO of yours. I bet I can. Be there in ten. Don’t move!

I slid my phone back into my pocket and plopped down on a park bench. A whole new wardrobe? I didn’t even know what my style was.

My usual attire was jeans and t-shirts when I wasn’t at work. I had a few dresses, but they were mostly for special occasions. I wanted to make a good impression on Brennan’s parents, even though I’d already met them.

A few minutes later, Belle showed up. She plopped down next to me on the bench and nudged me with her shoulder.

“So, what’s up?”

“Were you nearby?” I asked. Belle lived on the other side of town, so it was unusual for her to be in the city center this early in the morning. She giggled and then covered her face.

“Are you blushing?” I teased.

“I met a guy. I went to one of those singles happy hour events and we really hit it off. He was so sweet and soooo attractive. He lives in the city; he’s a lawyer.” She fanned her face with her hand. “I stayed over at his place last night.”

I grinned. “Scandalous.”

“What about you, Miss Make-Believe. What do you need my help with?”

I bit my lip. Belle was going to have a field day with this. Once I spilled the beans, I’d never hear the end of it, but I needed her help.

I took a deep breath and let it all out, from the proposition in the office, to the hot tub, to the mind-blowing sex. When I finished, her mouth was hanging open and she was speechless.

“Did I leave you speechless?” I chuckled. “Wow, in all the years I’ve known you, I’ve never managed that before.”

Belle nodded before pulling me into a hug and practically shouting, “Welcome to the land of the living, Grace!”

“Land of the living?” I asked. Was she implying that I’d been living a lifeless existence before all of this? My life had been fine. I had a good job, money, a home.

I knew what she meant though—for the first time in a long time, I felt alive.

“You’re finally taking what you want from life, Grace!” Belle exclaimed. “And Sex on Legs Brennan is the perfect place to start.”

Belle grabbed my wrist and pulled me to my feet. We strolled down the street and into a clothing boutique.

Belle sifted through the racks while I looked around the store, wide-eyed. It reminded me of the place where I’d been with Brennan’s family to get the bridesmaids dresses and I felt completely out of my element.

We spent a few hours and a ridiculous amount of money on clothes before finally calling it quits.

“I think that should be enough.” Belle giggled, holding onto three of my bags. “You lucky duck, I’d love a whole new wardrobe.”

“I’m not keeping the clothes. At least not the ones I don’t wear,” I replied. “I’ll be returning them after the weekend.”

Belle sighed. “Well that’s a shame. I don’t think Brennan would expect you to do that though. So maybe consider keeping them…or at least donate them to your best friend Belle.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re impossible.” I shifted the three bags in my right hand into my left with the other three I held and pulled my phone from my pocket.

“Shit, it’s quarter to twelve, I need to get to Wolf Industries.”

“Relax, we’re a block away. I’ll walk with you.”

Belle and I walked to Wolf Industries. I set the nine bags down on the ground and tried to ignore the uneasy feeling in my stomach. What if this was too much?

“You’re overthinking,” Belle noted. “You really like him, don’t you? Like more than this friends with benefits thing you mentioned.”

I found myself nodding. I did. The more time I spent with Brennan, the more time I wanted to spend with him. It just felt right.

Then I reminded myself of everything I knew. Brennan was a womanizer and I had just fallen for his charms. I needed to be realistic.

“He’s not the settling down type,” I mused. “I know too much about that side of him, Belle. Trust me, this is as good as it’s going to get.”

Belle frowned. “You don’t think people can change?”

I shook my head. “I know they can, I’ve just seen too much, Belle.”

We sat for a moment longer, then Brennan walked out of the doors.

Belle leaned in and whispered in my ear, “I’m not sure he looks at every girl like he looks at you, Grace. It’s like you hung the moon or something.”

Brennan smiled as he walked toward us. I brushed aside Belle’s comment and pointed to the bags.

“I hope I didn’t go overboard?”

“No, not at all.” He looked over at Belle. “Belle, right? I remember you from the luncheon.”

“That’s right.” Belle grinned. “Well, I’d better get back to my friend. Call me later, Grace?”

I nodded and watched as Belle left. Brennan scooped the bags up before I had a chance to react.

“Wait here, I’ll take these to the car and then we can go for lunch. I’ve booked us a table at Maldofs.”

I nodded and watched as he left. Maldofs? I knew the place. I’d made plenty of business bookings for Brennan there before to impress potential clients.

Brennan, of course, had all the connections, so getting a reservation at one of New York’s finest restaurants wasn’t a problem. Why was he wasting it on me?

I was hardly dressed for Maldofs. I was still wearing my jeans and t-shirt after all. Compared to polished Brennan, I looked like a charity case.

I pushed myself to my feet and ran after him. He was already in the parking garage when I caught up to him.

“You okay?” he asked, concern etched into his eyes.

“I feel underdressed for Maldofs,” I murmured.

Brennan gave me a once-over and shrugged. “You look good to me.”

I shook my head, reaching out for one of the bags.

“I look like I’m headed to a movie, not a Michelin-starred restaurant.”

Brennan bit his lip, offering the bags to me. I grabbed one. Whatever was inside had to be better than what I was wearing.

“I’ll be back in a flash.”

I darted towards the restrooms near the elevator and quickly changed. I’d picked the bag with the form-fitting black cocktail dress that Belle had convinced me to buy.

I frowned as I slipped it on, trading my sneakers for the undoubtedly uncomfortable stiletto pumps. Thankfully, there was a black lace bolero in the bag too. I put it on and stuffed my discarded clothes into the bag.

I made my way back to the parking lot, feeling like Bambi on ice. Brennan’s eyes widened, and his jaw tightened as he took the bag from me.

“Damn, G,” he breathed.

“I look ridiculous, don’t I?” I asked, wrapping my arms around myself.

Brennan stepped closer to me. He gently pulled at my arms until they fell to my sides, then wrapped his arms around my waist.

“You don’t look ridiculous.” He paused, swallowing hard. “You look incredible, Grace. You always look incredible. Even in rags, you’d look incredible. You have no idea how stunning you are.”

His sweet words were working their magic. I melted into him, and we kissed, lost in the moment. If I didn’t know better, I could have pretended this was all real.

“We should head to lunch,” he murmured, pulling away. “We’ll drive. I don’t want you walking far in those ankle-breakers.”

Relieved, I smiled back at him. “That sounds perfect.”

The drive to Maldofs was quick; it was just a few blocks away. Brennan parked the car, and we walked in together.

We were seated at the usual table I booked for Brennan’s business meetings. It was at the back, with a view of the city. The waitress left us with menus and a wine list.

“You didn’t have to bring me here,” I said softly.

“I wanted to,” he replied. “I’ve been wanting to for a while.”

I frowned, shaking my head. “What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s always business when I’m here. With you, I knew it wouldn’t be.”

“Why not bring any of the girls you’ve dated here?” I asked, surprising myself.

Brennan glanced down at his menu and sighed. He moved it aside and clasped his hands together.

“I don’t date,” he said. “I don’t lead women on with dinner dates. Winings and dinings can be misunderstood.”

I frowned again, shaking my head. “So they all knew this.”

Brennan nodded. “Grace, we don’t need to discuss this now.”

I took a deep breath and nodded. I was hungry, and talking about Brennan’s past flings was sure to ruin my appetite.

“Are we ready to order?” the waitress asked as she returned.

“I’ll have the mushroom ravioli and a large orange juice, thanks,” Brennan said with a smile, handing back his menus.

“I’ll have the same,” I echoed.

The waitress left, and Brennan’s hand found mine.

“I’ll drive you back after lunch. I don’t have anything else until three.”

“You don’t have to.”

“And yet I’m going to,” Brennan replied with a smile. “You can put your things in my closet. I cleared some space this morning when I got dressed for work.”

I just nodded, looking out the window. I could see why Brennan didn’t bring girls here if he was only interested in one thing.

It was easy to get swept up in the romance of it all. A secluded table, a beautiful city view, soft music.

I was a friend. Even though we’d added a very solid ‘with benefits’ to that title, our relationship was still based on the same thing. He’d brought me here as a friend.

“You okay?” Brennan asked.

"It’s so beautiful here. I’ve never… No, I know I haven’t. I’ve never been anywhere like this. I feel like I’m going to mess up and break something any second.”

Brennan chuckled. “Want to know a secret?” He leaned across the table. “I feel that way every single time I’m here.”

Our food arrived a few minutes later, and it was as delicious as expected. I tried not to overthink things and just enjoy it, but it was hard when my mind was in a whirl over the man sitting across from me.

Once we were done, Brennan paid the bill and drove me back to his apartment. Once inside, I walked to his bedroom and placed the shopping bags on his bed.

His closet was open, and it was a walk-in. I didn’t have enough to fill the space he’d left me, but I’d make it work. I took off the dress and hung it up before changing back into my jeans and t-shirt.

I managed to make the space work for the amount of clothes I had. I spun around inside the closet and smiled.

This was probably the closest I was ever going to get to actually having a walk-in, so I was going to enjoy it. I ran my fingers over Brennan’s work shirts before spotting a shoe box labeled ‘college’.

I frowned. My curiosity was piqued, even though I knew snooping was invading Brennan’s privacy. I bent down and lifted it, surprised by how light it was.

Like a kid sneaking candy, I peeked out of the closet to make sure I was alone, then sat down and carefully lifted the lid.

There were movie tickets, a beer mat, and a napkin with a phone number scribbled on it. Hidden beneath it all was a polaroid of Brennan and a stunning young woman.

They were gazing into each other’s eyes. He was holding her, and he was smiling.

I’d never seen Brennan with any of his flings, but he didn’t have a closet full of keepsake boxes either, so I knew this girl was special. Guilt washed over me; I’d overstepped a boundary.

I replaced the lid on the box and put it back where I’d found it, then leaned against the closet wall, biting my lip.

Who was she? Brennan had always said he wasn’t the settling down type, yet here were mementos from a relationship that had ended ten years ago.

I was still thinking about the box when Brennan came home. I hadn’t cooked—actually, I wasn’t hungry at all.

But it didn’t matter because as soon as Brennan shut the apartment door, he tossed his keys on the bench and came straight to me, lifting me off the ground and carrying me to his bedroom.

He set me on the bed, kissed me, and started to unbutton my jeans.

“If I’m coming on too strong, tell me.”

I shook my head and glanced down at his pants. They were already undone. Brennan moved away, pulling off my jeans and underwear before kissing the inside of my thigh.

I almost collapsed but his hands held me gently in place. His lips traced a path along the sensitive inner thigh until he finally kissed me where I wanted him most.

I gasped and reached for something to muffle my cries, but Brennan paused for a moment.

“Don’t. I like hearing you.”

I listened. Letting go felt more right than trying to suppress the passion burning within me.

He knew what he was doing, he knew where to apply pressure and when, he knew when to slow down and when to speed up. I couldn’t help but wonder where he’d learned his skills.

But right now, with his mouth on me, I didn’t care. I could feel my climax building slowly from deep within, almost to the point of pain.

I called his name, running my fingers through his hair. Then a wave of pure pleasure hit me. I trembled, his hands still holding me, preventing me from curling up.

I cried out, yearning for closeness, for him to be inside me, consuming me. As if he knew what I was thinking, he moved back up the bed and entered me.

I gasped again, in surprise and joy. We kissed. I could taste myself on his lips, sweet and salty.

“Grace,” he whispered. “I can’t hold back.”

“Don’t,” I replied.

I opened my eyes. I watched him as he moved, his pace quickening, his breathing becoming ragged. He held me, his hand behind my neck. His eyes were closed.

He whispered, “~Fuck.~” I watched as his orgasm overtook him, and the intensity of it made me squirm beneath him, quickly following his climax with my second.

“I’ve been thinking about doing that all day,” he whispered, moving off me and onto his bed.

“You have?” I replied, somewhat surprised.

“Yes,” he said, without elaborating.

I sat up and gathered my clothes from the floor before heading into Brennan’s bathroom. I cleaned myself up and pulled my pants back on.

When I came back out, Brennan was changing into shorts and a t-shirt. He looked over at me and smiled.

His smile shattered me. I’d snooped, and the guilt came rushing back. As he walked over to me, I stepped back.

“I did something.”

“What do you mean?” Brennan asked, his voice free of worry. He tried to close the distance between us again, and I stepped back again.

“When I was putting the clothes in the closet, I, uh, I saw a box. I know it was none of my business and it was private. I just…I knew I shouldn’t have looked but I did. I’m sorry, Brennan.” I stopped. “I’m really sorry.”

Brennan straightened up. He didn’t look mad, but he didn’t look okay either. He took a deep breath and his jaw tightened.

“I-I forgot that was there,” he murmured. “Uh, excuse me.”

Brennan turned and left the room. I followed him, even though I knew there was nothing I could do to undo what I’d done. The damage was done.

Brennan grabbed his keys and shoved his feet into his sneakers before leaving the apartment.

Brennan still wasn’t back as it neared ten o’clock. I changed into my pajamas and climbed into bed in the guest room.

I hated that I’d hurt him. I’d called his phone a few times, but it went straight to voicemail.

I lay in bed, restless and unable to sleep.

***

Around half past eleven, I heard footsteps. I sighed with relief that he’d returned, but stayed in bed, too embarrassed to face him yet.

A few minutes later there was a knock at my door. I considered not answering—avoidance seemed like a good strategy, albeit a cowardly one.

“Come in,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

The door opened and Brennan walked in. He sat down on the end of the bed with the box I’d opened in his hands.

“I had a girlfriend in my freshman year of college,” Brennan said softly. “Dulcie.”

I watched him in the dim light of the room, thanks to the bedside lamp being on. He looked sad, a look I hadn’t seen on him before.

“You don’t have to tell me, Brennan. I snooped. It wasn’t my place.”

Brennan shook his head. “I want to. Dulcie and I were inseparable. I was hesitant about introducing her to my parents because I was resentful of meeting their expectations. Looking back, it was stupid.

“Then, about six months into our relationship, she got sick.” He picked up the polaroid. “She died three months later.”

My heart ached. Brennan had been in love. He’d given his heart to someone, and he’d lost her.

I pushed the blankets off and stood up. I walked over to Brennan and wrapped my arms around him.

“My folks never had a clue. I suppose I pulled away from them a bit more after that. I was ashamed they’d never gotten to meet her.”

“I’m so sorry, Brennan. I had no idea,” I murmured, pulling him closer.

He set the box down on the bed and wrapped his arms around me. “You couldn’t have known. I’ve never shared this with anyone…until now.”

I moved back and sat on the bed, my hands still entwined with Brennan’s.

“Is she the reason you’re not one for settling down?”

“What I told you last weekend was the truth. Dulcie was the exception. I fell hard for her. I was like a lovesick fool, always finding excuses to be around her. After her…after she was gone…

“A part of me went with her. I don’t want to experience that kind of pain again.”

I nodded in understanding. The agony of losing someone you love is unbearable, like a heavy anchor pulling you down. If you’re not careful, it can rip you to shreds.

Brennan had dealt with it by protecting himself, by eliminating the possibility of ever getting hurt like that again.

“I understand,” I said.

Brennan withdrew his hands from mine, picked up the box, and placed it on the dresser at the foot of the bed. He came back to me and scooted me up the bed.

I was barely clothed, so my garments were discarded in an instant. Amidst a flurry of passionate kisses, Brennan’s clothes were also quickly removed, and then we were one. Moving in unison, lost in each other and the moment.

This time was different, it was a dance, and we were so perfectly in tune that each touch was met flawlessly. Together we unraveled, and then we drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I knew I was falling in love.