Chapter 24: Run, Run Away

His words should have made my heart soar. I loved him too. But I couldn’t let it sink in. I couldn’t accept it.

“Brennan. You just confessed that I know you better than anyone else. You think you love me because you don’t have to hide anything from me. There’s a difference.”

Brennan rose to his feet, a bitter chuckle escaping his lips.

“You just proved my point. I messed up. You don’t even believe me.”

I wanted to turn around and tell him I loved him more than anything. I hated seeing the hurt and regret etched on his face. But I just couldn’t. He was right—as much as I wanted to forget what I knew, I couldn’t.

I couldn’t even tally the number of times I’d talked a girl out of reaching out to him again. There were too many.

The Brennan I’d worked with for three years had been a closed book, and the Brennan I’d been with the last couple of weeks had turned all of that upside down, that much was true.

But I couldn’t just forget about why I was leaving in the first place. It wasn’t that he’d had a playboy past, it was that he’d made me an unwilling accomplice.

Maybe he did love me, or maybe for once, since he’d lost his college sweetheart, he’d let someone in long enough to get to know the real him.

I stood up and walked over to him. I lifted my hands to his face and tiptoed until I could place a kiss on his lips.

At first he didn’t respond. His entire body was rigid, and his arms were crossed over his chest, but within a few seconds he had his arms around me, returning my kiss with a passion that was almost desperate.

The apartment door handle turned. Brennan slowly let me go and pressed his lips against my forehead.

We spent the rest of the evening maintaining our charade, pretending to be the picture of a happy couple for his parents, who were none the wiser.

I hadn’t even had time to feel guilty about our lies anymore because all I could think about was what Brennan had said.

When we went to bed, we slept as far apart on his bed as we could. I could feel him letting me go, and I knew I was doing the same, I just didn’t know why.

***

The next morning, we got up early. I hugged Jaq and Sam goodbye. Jaq made me promise to call her once they were in France. They wheeled their cases to the door.

Before he followed them, Brennan pulled me in for a hug. He held onto me for a long time, before pulling back and kissing me on the lips.

“We need to talk,” he whispered into my ear.

I ignored the shivers that ran through me, and the crippling fear. I didn’t want to talk. Talking meant facing all of this, and I wasn’t ready.

Brennan left with his parents, and I knew that was it.

I walked into Brennan’s room and grabbed my suitcase. I put my clothes inside, the ones I’d come here with, and then dragged it behind me to the apartment door.

I placed Brennan’s key card down on the bench and then walked out the door. I checked it was locked behind me, and then I left.

I wasn’t even sure where I was going until I hailed a cab and gave them Belle’s address.

***

I texted her from the sidewalk.

Grace

Knock, knock. Can I stay for a couple days.

Belle

Of course! Where are you.

Grace

Downstairs :)

Belle buzzed me in, and once I was in front of her apartment door, I knocked. She opened it and looked me up and down. She frowned and took my suitcase.

“Everything okay?”

“Oh yeah, uh, Brennan’s parents just left, so my job is done. So to speak.” I smiled and walked inside. Belle closed and dead-bolted the door behind her.

“And so he just kicked you out?” She sounded confused.

I shook my head and walked over to her sofa and sat down.

“No,” I whispered. “I left.”

Belle sat down across from me on her yellow armchair. Her eyes narrowed, and she shook her head.

“You left?”

“The ruse was over. I can move on with my life and him with his. It’s better this way.”

I didn’t believe a word I was saying, but maybe if I said it enough, I would start to believe it.

Belle walked into the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of wine. She poured two glasses and walked across the floor.

“And he said nothing?” she said as she handed me a glass.

I bit my lip and shrugged. “I wouldn’t say that. He doesn’t know I left.”

I placed the glass of wine down on the table and slumped into the seat. I’d known leaving without a word was a dick move, but I was getting in first.

Brennan couldn’t break my heart if I wasn’t there for him to break it.

“Grace!” Belle exclaimed, sounding more than a little shocked. “You’re going to ghost him?”

I shook my head. “I don’t see it like that,” I whispered, though she was right. I’d inadvertently done the very thing I’d watched him do.

I wasn’t being vindictive, I wasn’t trying to get revenge and payback for all the slighted girls before me... I was saving myself from heartache. Wasn’t I?

“Have you guys even discussed feelings? Or has it just been sex?”

I bit my lip. Brennan and I had shared more with each other in the three years we’d been working together than we had with anyone else. Even before all of this madness. But that didn’t mean we were meant to be.

“We talked. We shared things about our pasts and insecurities, but we were always kind of friends, Belle. It wasn’t ever strictly a professional dynamic—a little rigid and robotic, maybe.”

“And now?” she asked softly. “How robotic is it now, how closed off is he now—how closed off are you?”

I picked up the wine glass and pressed it against my lips. I took a small sip and frowned.

After drinking Wolf Wines, every other brand didn’t quite compare. The irony wasn’t lost on me. I wasn’t sure anyone could ever compare to Brennan either.

“He said he loved me,” I finally admitted. The words twisted my stomach as they slipped out, as if voicing them made it all too real. I shut my eyes. “So, if that’s the case, I guess he’s not as guarded as I thought.”

Belle nearly choked on her wine. Her glass thudded onto the table, and she slapped her hands down onto the polished wood.

“He loves you,” Belle echoed, a smile playing on her lips.

“That’s what he claims,” I responded.

Belle’s smile faded, and she shook her head. “I don’t believe Brennan Wolf is the type to joke about such heartfelt confessions. How do you feel about him? Do you love him too?”

I scrunched up my face and shook my head, even though I was deceiving myself. Belle’s frown deepened. She leaned in and placed her hand over mine.

“I can see right through you, Grace. I won’t dictate your actions, and my home is your home for as long as you need.” She paused and finished off her glass.

“But for someone who has admittedly watched more rom-coms than I even knew existed…you’re exasperating. When the handsome, wealthy, unattainable man confesses his love for you, it’s the best damn part.”

***

An hour later, my phone buzzed. It was Brennan. I declined the call and stuffed the phone back into my pocket. A few minutes later, it vibrated again.

Brennan

You left? Grace, talk to me.

I pondered over replying for what felt like forever, but each time I started to type something, I deleted it.

Belle was right. Brennan had revealed a side of himself I’d never seen before.

He was reaching out to me, calling and texting; he didn’t want me to go. He’d been in love before, he’d lost love before, he recognized what he was feeling.

It was me. I had never fallen in love. I had never handed my entire heart to a man and hoped for the best. Until now...and it scared the hell out of me.