I know I have to take this to the police, but I also know they won't do a thing. Just like with Lara. I get off the chair and take my phone. First thing I do is go to the contacts. I see Daniel's name there, he left his number. He also called himself with my phone, meaning he has my number too.
I call the police to report the photo and they ask for me to go into the station. I know I can't live hiding from the world, but even though it's still daylight, I open my door very cautiously and look each way before getting out. I look at every person I pass, trying to make eye contact to determine if they're the stalker. I don't get anything out of it apart from some confused looks from strangers that notice I'm examining them.
On my way to the police station, I make a stop at a kitchenware store. I search around for a while, until I come across a small switchblade. One of those knives that spring out from the handle on the press of a button. It's small enough to fit into my pocket. I don't know if it would help me with an attacker, but at least it makes me feel like I have something to rely on. I also go to a tech shop searching for a security camera, unfortunately most of them are out of my budget so I settle for a cheap battery operated one. It has a small range, but it will be able to capture anyone within about a meter from the door.
I go straight home after giving the report to the police. When I get home, I start looking up a bunch of videos on self-defence. Not a full hour later, Nina comes home from uni. As soon as she sees me, she can tell something is wrong. I show her the photo and the message,
"This is becoming serious!" she cries, hugging me, "you have to stay in the house until they catch him!"
"I was thinking the same, but I can't just sit here, wait for something to happen. I have to keep living my life"
"But what if he does something to you? He knows where you work, where you perform, where you live... how can you even for a moment think to continue doing things when-"
"Nina, I can't just sit in here. I can't. I'd go crazy"
"I can stay with you"
"Until when?"
"Until he's caught"
"Who will catch him? The police aren't doing a thing to find him. Lara has been on them since the start, they did nothing at all. They might never find him. Not until he does something like..." I cut myself off, wiping at the tears that once again filled my eyes,
"Are you saying you're planning on going to your dance tonight?"
"What option do I have?"
"But he might attack you! You can't seriously plan on walking alone"
"I'll walk to the studio, it's still daylight, and then I'll catch a taxi home"
"With what money? Even if you get a cab today, what will you do tomorrow? The day after? You got the vet bill to worry about too. How do you think that will all work?"
A knock on our door stops our conversation, Nina stands up to open. We both know it's her boyfriend George, she's been expecting him. I lower my head back into my hands. I know she's right about everything, but honestly, what choice do I have? Whoever the stalker is, he's obviously trying to scare me. The only reason he'd leave a letter under my door is to have me afraid. And I don't want to give that satisfaction to him. I don't want to be afraid.
"Hey Sofia" George greets, I lift my eyes, he's looking at me curiously, "you okay?"
"Yeah, all good"
"Nina told me about your stalker"
"She did?" I glance over at Nina,
"You know I tell him everything" she shrugs, "but there's more, George. She got a letter from him"
"Oh? What letter?"
And then Nina and George read over the letter ten times over and discuss it all. I know they're trying to help, but after two hours at the police station and the whole morning thinking about it all, I just want a break.
"And worst of all is she still plans on walking to dance" Nina finishes,
"Alone?" George asks me, I shrug,
"I'll have to see"
"I can drop you off, what time is it?" he asks,
"No, don't worry. It's still daylight when I have to go"
"I'm happy to drop you off"
"I'll be okay. Where are you two off to?" I change the subject,
"Movies, I'll be back here in a few hours. If you have enough time to wait for me, we can walk together-"
"No, no" I shake my head,
"Or, how about this? We can got to the movies tomorrow. I'll stay with you today and-"
"No, Nina!" I stop her, "I'm telling you it's still daylight when I leave, I'll be fine... but can I ask you to do something for me?"
"Yes, what?"
"I'm going to take the dog out now, then I have to go to dance, can you and George take him out when you're back?"
"I can do that"
"With George. Do it with George"
"Why?" she frowns,
"Nina, whoever is following me probably knows about you as well. As much as I have to be careful, so do you"
"You really think he'd... oh, god, you have a point actually. That's scary" Nina looks over at George, worry in her eyes,
"We'll take the dog out together" George promises, "and I agree, you both have to be cautious. I mean, who knows what the stalker is capable of?"
"Nothing good, that's for sure" Nina shakes her head, she sits on George's lap and hugs him around his neck, "I wish you could just move in with us" she tells him,
"I know baby, me too" he whispers,
Once they leave, I put a lead on the dog and take him out, we make our way out very slowly. I can't really walk him since he has a splint on, so we spend half an hour outside and then I take him back in. The whole time, I'm turning left and right, trying to catch anyone watching me.
I'm still feeling jittery on my way to the dance theatre, although there are many people around, I can't help but feel on edge. I find Lara in the changing room, I show her the letter and neither of us go to practice, instead we sit on a bench and talk. Lara's brother Elias will be coming over here after dance, since he works on the other part of the city, and he must catch public transport himself, he'll be arriving close to two hours after our performance finishes, Lara says we'll wait for him together and they'll catch a bus with me and walk me to my place, then go home. I know it's a huge inconvenience for them both, but I have no option.
"We need to get a drivers license and car" I say,
"But it's so expensive. The registration costs more than our rents combined and then there's petrol... that's why Elias doesn't drive either"
"I know, but at least if one of us gets a car, we can drive each other. We can't make Elias do this all the time"
"I know, imagine how it is for him. He finishes work and then comes for me, he's spending five hours a day driving back and forth on public transport"
"I have to get a second job, and then I'll apply for a driver's license"
"And then save up for a car?"
"How long will that take?"
"Hey, what if we get a bike? At least then we'd be fast, we could get away if-"
"Hey my beauties!" Raymond walks in, cutting us off, "what's wrong? You both look worried? Why did you miss practice?"
"It's nothing, we're just chatting" Lara shrugs,
"Sure? Sofia you're pale? What happened?"
"Nothing, just some things came up"
"You can't fool me," he squints his eyes, "you always have a smile on your face, and you'd never miss practice. It's something big?"
Lara and I shake our heads.
"It's all good, I promise" I say, forcing a smile,
"Let's go, the dance is starting, they're calling you" he says, we get up and change. Tonight, I'm wearing a short, sparkly white dress decorated with flowy silver see-through ribbons.
Normally dance takes all my worries away, and that's exactly what I need tonight. Once I am on stage, I immediately feel in my element. Tonight's dance is a mix of modern and jazz. Two styles I love. The music is upbeat, the atmosphere alive.
There's three of us girls on stage, we're leading the dance. I stand in the centre, Lara to my left, Stacey to my right. Another two girls come in and out, with Raymond and another male dancer. This particular routine starts off with the structured and rhythmic movements of jazz. My body moves quickly, in perfect sync with the music. I'm forgetting myself, I close my eyes, my hair softly falls around my body, bouncing with every move. We seamlessly transition into more fluid, abstract movements of contemporary dance, conveying a story through our movements.
The last part of the dance comes quicker than I'd want it, my body is so alive that I'm not ready to stop, not yet. In preparation for the final move, I smile, looking out at the audience, I capture their faces. And then I almost fall. It's a millisecond where I take a wrong step and my body trembles. It happens at the exact moment my eyes meet Daniel's. I recompose myself quickly, with the fast pace I doubt the audience would have noticed. But my eyes stay glued to Daniel's. Though he's standing all the way at the back, with his towering height, it's impossible not to see him. He's wearing a grey zip-up sweater, his arms are crossed over his enormous chest. He's looking right at me. Not at Lara, not at the other dancers. At me.