Colby's POV
I was trembling, knowing Julia had snapped the way she did just now.
I didn't know why she was with Will, but I think seeing her triggered the same feelings she got when she saw her dad.
It was a part of her that I hated to see, since she looked so broken and so upset. I was terrified she was going to hurt herself while I wasn't watching.
"I'm sorry." Julia said quietly, her voice cracking. "Hey, don't worry about it. I think it's time we go back to the apartment." I said as she wiped her cheeks.
Her hands were shaking and she refused to look at me.
"Jules, sweetheart." I said and reached for her hand, causing her to look up at me. "I wanted to do it." She said quietly.
"Do what?" I asked with a sigh. "Kill him...kill myself.." She whispered. "I know, love. It's gonna be okay. I know you've got a lot going on." I said with a sigh.
"We're gonna go home and you can relax. I just have to go take care of a couple things really fast." I said and sat her down in the chair she usually sat in.
"Don't leave me." She said causing me to frown. "Only for a second, my love." I said then kissed her forehead.
I didn't want to leave her, but I had to go retrieve the gun that was left in Will's room.
He was chained to a wall so he wouldn't even be able to grab it, but I didn't want him getting any ideas.
I was upset that Julia went into his room to talk to him. She was doing so much better in her recovery before this and it broke my heart seeing her take a few steps back again.
When I left the room I immediately went to the room Will was in.
"Co-" He started as soon as the door opened. "Shut up. I told you not to fucking talk to her." I snapped and reached down to grab the gun.
"You-" He tried but I clenched my jaw then hit him in the head with the handle of the gun.
"Enough. I'll deal with you later." I grumbled then turned and left the room, locking it.
Before I could go back to Julia, I had to talk to Jeremy.
"Oh, hey Colby." Jeremy said and looked up at me. "Hey. Jules is having a hard time so I'm gonna take her back. I'll do some work at home, but I want you to take a break." I said as he nodded.
"Have you worked through who gets to live or die?" He asked as I shook my head. "Got through most of them before I heard Julia screaming." I said with a sigh.
"I'll finish my investigation later, I have to get her home." I said then turned to leave the room. "Alright, just keep me updated." Jeremy said with a small smile before looking at his computer screen again.
"Will do." I said then left the room. When I got back to my office, Julia was nervously picking at her nails. When she finally realized I was there she flinched, looking up at me.
"It's just me, sweetheart." I said then came over and reached my hand out. "Let's go home." I said as she nodded, sniffling.
I could tell that Will told Julia something, because she was a lot more cautious.
I noticed her glancing around sporadically as we made our way down the hallway and outside.
"Nobody is going to hurt you, Julia." I reminded. "He said they're watching." She whispered, causing me to scrunch my brow.
"Don't listen to him." I said then opened her car door. "He said you wouldn't believe it." She said and looked up at me.
"I don't want you to worry, darling. None of this is your problem and I'm taking every step to protect you." I said and looked into her eyes.
"This isn't your battle and I'm not going to make you fight it. I want you to focus on your mental health. Understand?" I asked as she nodded.
I kissed her gently then stepped back so I could close her door.
I didn't know what Will told her, but I could assume he said more people were after us.
It pissed me off, because there was always someone after us. Julia didn't need to be reminded of that right now.
She needed to focus on herself.
When we got back to the apartment, Julia went into the bedroom and sat on the bed.
"Are you hungry?" I asked as she shook her head, looking up at me.
"I need to take the pill." She said as my heart sank. "Tonight?" I asked as she nodded. "Okay." I said quietly then went to go get it.
I didn't want to watch her go through this process. I wanted Julia to just rest and take care of herself.
Instead she had to go through this.
I grabbed the pill that Julia would take then grabbed her some water and a couple extra pillows and blankets.
I knew she was going to be in a lot of pain and I wasn't looking forward to seeing it.
"Alright, sweetheart. Ready?" I asked as she nodded and laid back, leaning against the pillows.
"I'll be right by your side the whole time." I said then handed her the little white pill. "Hold on." She whispered then got out of bed and went towards the bathroom.
She came back a couple minutes later, with a towel in her hands. "Just in case." She said quietly then laid it on the bed.
Once the towel was down, she laid on the bed again. I felt my heart sink as she took the pill.
There was no going back.
"Now what?" Julia asked as I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her close.
"We wait." I said and ran my fingers through her hair gently. "I'm scared." She said and looked up at me. "I know, we're gonna get you through this though." I said then kissed her forehead.
We laid in silence for a little while before Julia was gasping, her hands shaking.
"Talk to me, Jules. What's going on?" I asked as she cried out, turning her face into my chest.
I frowned then kissed her head, trying to ease the panic I know she was feeling.
I know she had been through this before, and it was going to bring back those horrible memories. I had to do my best to keep her calm and make her feel loved.
It was the only thing I could do for her.
"It hurts." Julia gasped, seizing up from the pain. "I know, love. It'll be over soon." I said, even though I didn't know if that was true.
I probably should have asked more questions before giving her this pill, but it was too late now.
We just had to wait.
It felt like hours had passed before Julia was stiffening in my arms. I scrunched my brow, looking down to see her eyes rolled back.
"Julia?" I asked with wide eyes. "Hey...come back to me." I begged as her mouth started foaming. "Fuck. Julia, you've gotta come back to me." I said frantically.
I have seen Julia have some bad seizures but this felt different and much worse.
"Damnit!" I hissed as she shook violently. It felt like and eternity before she was finally getting out of it.
"There you are." I said as she whimpered and hid her face in my chest. "You scared me there." I said quietly, running my fingers through her hair.
"It hurts." Julia said quietly. "I know. You're so so strong though. I'm so proud of you." I said and scratched her back.
We laid in silence for a little while before Julia looked up at me. "What's going on?" I asked and brushed her hair behind her ear.
"Are we gonna have kids one day?" She asked, her voice timid.
"I never thought I would want kids. They seemed like more of a pain in the ass than anything." I said with a small laugh.
"Since meeting you though, I think that's changed." I said with a smile. "Now, I can't imagine a life where we don't have kids." I said then kissed her head.
"But we can't." Julia said with a frown. "Why not?" I asked as she sniffled. "It's too dangerous. I couldn't live with myself if our kid was brought into the crime world." She said as I hummed.
"You're right." I said quietly. I wanted to tell her that I was toying with the idea of leaving the crime world.
I didn't want to get her hopes up because I didn't know how it would work.
It would have been easier if I wasn't who I was. It would have been easier if people weren't out to get me.
They wanted my title, and they wanted to take me down.
It wasn't as simple as just leaving and changing everything about me.
Although, I wished it was that easy.