âTo get Tessa; sheâs hanging out with . . . never mind.â Iâm sick of telling people my fucking business.
Now Riley does stop. âYouâre an asshole for not telling her that Lil is gay.â
âOf course she told you,â I say.
âShe tells me everything. That was a major dick move.â
âItâs a long story.â
âYou wonât move to Seattle with Tessa, and nowââshe flips her hair over her shoulderââsheâs probably giving that blond dude a blow job in the bathroom ofââ
I step toward her, anger boiling in my veins. âShut the fuck up. Now. Donât you fucking dare say shit like that to me.â I have to remember that even though she has a mouth like mine, she is a female and I would never take it there.
Unfazed by my outburst, she replies calmly, âDonât like that much, do you? Maybe youâd do best to remember that next time you make some snarky-ass comment about fucking my girlfriend.â
My breathing falters, deep and out of control. I canât stop thinking about Tessaâs full lips touching him. I tug at my hair again and turn in a circle.
âItâs driving you crazy, isnât it? Her being with him?â
âYou really need to stop taunting me,â I warn her, and she shrugs.
âI know it is. Look, I probably shouldnât have said that, but you were a dick first, remember?â When I donât respond, she continues. âLetâs call a truce here. Iâll buy you a drink, and you can cry over Tessa while I brag about how good Lillian is with her tongue.â She walks over to me and tugs at my sleeve, trying to drag me across the street. I can see the cheesy multicolored lantern lights on top of the tin roof of the small bar from here.
I jerk my arm away from her. âI need to get Tessa.â
âOne drink, and then Iâll come with you as backup.â Rileyâs words mimic my thoughts from a few minutes ago.
âWhy? Why do you want to hang out with me?â I make eye contact with her, and she shrugs again.
âI donât, really. But Iâm bored, and youâre out here. Besides, Lil seems to care about you for some reason that I donât get.â She runs her eyes up and down my body. âI really donât get it, but she likes you, as a friend,â Riley says, with as much emphasis on the word âfriendâ as possible. âSo yeah, I would like to impress her by pretending that I give a shit about your doomed relationship.â
âDoomed?â I begin to follow her down the road.
âOut of all the a shit that I just said, you chose that to comment on?â She shakes her head. âYouâre worse than me.â
She laughs and I stay quiet. The obnoxious girl grabs hold of my shirt again and leads me down the road. Iâm too busy thinking to push her off.
How can she think we are doomed when she doesnât even know me, know us?
We arenât doomed.
I know we arenât. Iâm damned, but sheâs not. She will save me. She always does.
Chapter forty-five
TESSA
Yikes, it dropped at least ten degrees out here,â Robert says to me as we step out the door. The cold air smacks me, and I wrap my arms around myself trying to stay warm. He looks over at me with a little frown. âI wish I had a jacket to offer you . . . I also wish I could offer to drive you back, but Iâve been drinking.â With a playfully horrified look, he adds, âGuess Iâm not very gentlemanly tonight.â
âItâs okay, really,â I say with a smile. âIâm pretty drunk, so Iâm warm . . . That makes no sense.â I giggle and follow him down the sidewalk in front of the restaurant. âAlthough, I should have worn different shoes.â
âWe could trade?â he jokes.
I gently push against his shoulder, and he smiles for what has to be the hundredth time tonight. âYour shoes look more comfortable than Hardinâs; his boots are so heavy and he always leaves them by the door, so I . . . never mind.â Embarrassed by what I just started talking about, I shake my head to stop myself.
âIâm more of a sneaker guy,â Robert says, letting me know itâs okay.
âMe, too. Well, not a guy.â Again I laugh. My head is swimming from the wine, and my mouth seems to let out every single thought that crosses my mind, nonsensical and all. âDo you know which way the cabins are?â
He reaches over to steady me as I almost walk into a parking block. âWhich cabins? This whole town is full of them.â
âUm, well, thereâs a street with a small sign and then like three or four more cabins, then another street?â I try to remember the drive to the restaurant from Ken and Karenâs place, but none of it makes sense.
âThat doesnât give me much to go onââhe chucklesââbut we can walk until we find it?â
âOkay, but if we donât find it within twenty minutes, Iâm going to a hotel.â I groan, dreading the walk and the discussion Hardin and I are sure to have when I arrive. And by âdiscussion,â I mean full-on, knock-down, drag-out verbal brawl. Especially when he finds out that Iâve been drinking with Robert.
Suddenly I turn to look at him as we walk through the dark. âDo you ever get sick of people telling you what to do all the time?â
âNo one really does, but if they did, I would.â
âYouâre lucky. I feel like someoneâs always telling me what to do, where to go, who to talk to, where to live.â I let out a breath and watch it turn to steam in the cold air. âItâs getting on my nerves.â