Chapter 11: Bound By Hatred: Chapter 10

The Outfit car came to a stop in front of the Scuderi villa and Luca parked the rental BMW right behind it. Luca and Aria exited the car immediately and I pushed the door open to follow them but paused when I realized Gianna hadn’t even unbuckled her belt yet. She was staring intently down at her hands resting in her lap. Annoyance flared up in me. Couldn’t she ever go the easy route? Did she have to be so damn stubborn?

“I’m not in the mood to argue with you, Gianna. You really shouldn’t let your father wait right now. He’s pissed as it is. Get out of the car or I’ll carry you.”

I waited for a clever comeback. Instead she reached to unbuckle herself. Her hands were shaking and suddenly I realized what was going on. Gianna wasn’t stalling to annoy me. She was nervous about being back here. Her fingers struggled with the seat belt. I pushed them away and did it for her. Her eyes shot up, brows drawn together as she searched my face. She looked fucking anxious. She didn’t even push my hands away, which were still resting on her thigh.

“We need to get out,” I said again, this time without the previous annoyance.

She nodded slowly, her eyes darting toward the window. I could see Luca and Aria watching us, and behind them Stan and Carmine were waiting. Romero lingered next to our second car, scanning the surroundings. I didn’t think this was a trap, but you could never know with the fucking Outfit. Things hadn’t exactly been peachy between us in the last few months.

“I’m scared,” she said quietly, then laughed harshly. “Isn’t it messed up that I’m scared of my own father?”

“Your father is Consigliere and a huge asshole. There are plenty of reasons to be scared of him.”

She was still staring at her lap. “He hates me. He wouldn’t even hesitate to put a bullet through my head after what I did.”

He’d have to go through me, and I had no doubt that I could take him down with one arm tied to my back. I hooked a finger under her chin and turned her face around to me until her blue eyes met mine. “I won’t allow it.”

For a moment she softened and her eyes darted to my lips but then Gianna became her usual self and pulled back. I almost groaned. She opened the door and slid out. When I caught up with her, there was no sign of fear on her face. She held her head high and sent Scuderi’s men the most scathing look I’d ever seen from her. That was the Gianna I knew. The only indication that she wasn’t as relaxed as she pretended was that she didn’t argue when I rested my hand on the small of her back as I led her toward the front door. I couldn’t wait to run my hands over every inch of her body, to finally claim her. Images of Sid with his paws on her slipped into my mind again and I had to resist the urge to hit something.

Luca raised his eyebrows, impatience written all over his face. “What took you so long for fuck’s sake?”

I ignored him because the door opened in that moment and Scuderi appeared in the doorframe, a scowl on his face. Gianna shrank against me. I didn’t think she even noticed because her face remained perfectly unimpressed.

Scuderi talked to his men briefly before sending them away and turning to Luca. They shook hands and then he hugged Aria. He hadn’t spared Gianna a single look so far. It annoyed the hell out of me. His cold eyes zoomed in on me and I sneered at him. I hated everything about that man, even his stupid face and slicked back hair. He looked like the worst cliché of a mobster.

“I see you found her,” he said.

“I always get what I want.”

He still didn’t even glance Gianna’s way but his expression turned cruel. “What you wanted was a reputable Italian girl. What you get are the ruins of God-knows how many men.”

Gianna stiffened under my hand, her eyes widening a fraction before she regained control over her face, but her father wasn’t done yet. No wonder he and my father had gotten along so well.

“I can’t see why you even bothered wasting your time on her. My men could have caught her without you.”

His men would have done a lot of things with Gianna. Luca narrowed his eyes at me in warning. Could he tell how much I wanted to bury my knife in Scuderi’s ugly mug? I glared back at Scuderi, wanting to wipe that superior grin off his face.

“I think we should go inside to discuss matters,” Luca said, using his Capo voice. It usually grated on my nerves when he did that, but this time it was probably for the best. I had a feeling that my knife would accidentally find its way into Scuderi’s eyeball if I had to bear his stupid expression another second.

Scuderi nodded and opened the door further. Gianna was practically pressed up against my side as we walked past him. Protectiveness burned through my veins. Maybe she didn’t realize it but that she sought my closeness when she was scared was all the confirmation I needed for her feelings for me, even if she wasn’t aware of them yet.

“How can you even touch her after what she’s done? After what you saw her doing. I’d be disgusted,” Scuderi said as he closed the door. He obviously didn’t expect a reply because he turned to Luca. “If my wife had done something like that, I would have killed her, and I have a feeling you would have done the same, Luca.”

Aria shot Luca a shocked look but he was busy staring Scuderi down. “I’m not here to discuss what-ifs with you. I want to have this settled once and for all. You promised us something and I expect you to deliver.”

“What I promised isn’t available anymore.” Scuderi nodded toward Gianna. “But if you want damaged goods, I’m sure we can come to an agreement. Dante is waiting in the living room for us. This is foremost Outfit business, and Dante will have the last word on the matter.”

Luca met my gaze, warning clear in his eyes. “Then let’s go. I have better things to do than chitchat with you. And I’m sure we can come to an understanding that will benefit all of us.”

I didn’t give a damn about Dante or Scuderi. I was taking Gianna back to New York with me, even if I had to gut every single Outfit asshole in the process.

Gianna I was trying very hard to keep a neutral expression but it was incredibly hard. To my embarrassment, Matteo’s hand on my back really helped me focus. His expression on the other hand only fueled my own anxiety. He looked like a man out for blood. I chanced a look at Luca and my father, who weren’t bothering to dish out pleasantries either.

Things had taken a definite turn for the worse since I’d left. If Luca was acting barely civil toward my father, relations between the Outfit and New York couldn’t be good right now.

Aria gently touched my arm, eyes full of worry. I forced a smile, but it must have been off because she only frowned in return. Damn it. Matteo nudged me forward. Father and Luca were already heading toward the living room, but at the sound of hurried footsteps I froze, my eyes darting to the staircase. Lily and Fabi were storming toward me, their faces alight with happiness. Tears sprang into my eyes as my little brother tackled me, burying his head against my sternum. God, he’d grown since I’d last seen him. How was that even possible? I’d been gone for only six months. And then Lily threw her arms around me as well. “We missed you so much,” she whispered tearfully. Fabi’s hold on me was making breathing difficult but I didn’t care.

I hugged them back just as tightly. While I’d been on the run, I’d barely dared thinking about my family because it had felt like a chasm was ripped into my chest every time I did.

“Didn’t I tell you to keep them upstairs?” Father hissed, causing me to look up and find Mother coming down the staircase hastily.

“I’m sorry. They were too quick,” she said in a meek voice. Her eyes flitted over to me briefly before she returned her gaze to Father without a word to me.

I swallowed. So this was it? Because I hadn’t done what they wanted I was dead to them? I’d known Father would condemn me but I’d hoped at least Mother would be happy to have me back.

“Lily, Fabi, back to your rooms.”

“But Father, we haven’t seen Gianna in forever,” Fabi grumbled. Father crossed the distance between us in two quick strides and wrenched my brother and sister away before shoving them toward Mother. “Upstairs now.”

Fabi jutted his chin out, and even Lily didn’t move. Father’s face was turning red in anger. “It’s okay,” I told them. “We can talk later.”

“No, you can’t. I won’t have you around them. You are no longer my daughter, and I don’t want your rottenness to rub off on Liliana,” Father said, eyes hard.

I wasn’t even sure what to say to that. He didn’t want me to see my own sister and brother anymore.

“That’s bullshit,” Matteo said.

“Matteo,” Luca warned. He was already gripping Aria’s wrist to keep her from interfering. “This isn’t our business.”

Father glared. “That’s right. This is my family, and Gianna is still subject to my rule, don’t you ever forget that.”

“I thought I wasn’t your daughter anymore, so why do I have to listen to a word you say?”

Matteo gripped my waist tightly. What? He could provoke my father but I wasn’t allowed to?

“Careful,” Father said. “You are still part of the Outfit.”

“We shouldn’t let Dante wait any longer,” Luca said.

This time we actually moved into the living room without incident. Dante Cavallaro was waiting in front of the window, talking on the phone. He hung up and turned to us. I had to suppress a shiver when his cold eyes settled on me. The ice man indeed. Suddenly I was really scared. This was serious.

I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt so horribly helpless.

“Luca, Matteo, Aria,” Dante Cavallaro said in his emotionless voice. “Gianna.”

I jumped in surprise. I’d figured he’d pretend I was beneath a greeting like my father had done. “Sir,” I said, bowing my head slightly. I hated doing it but I knew what was good for me.

“You realize that what you did was betrayal?” Dante asked.

I wasn’t sure what to say. If I agreed I’d be screwed, and if I didn’t I’d infuriate the man who could decide to have me killed.

“Gianna is my fiancée, and if she hadn’t run she’d be my wife by now. I think it should fall upon my brother as Capo of New York to determine if she deserves punishment.”

My eyes flew from Matteo to Luca whose hard eyes sent another shiver down my back.

“That’s ridiculous,” Father muttered.

Dante didn’t look offended though. “I take it you still want to go through with the wedding?”

“Yes,” Matteo said without hesitation.

Nobody bothered to ask what I wanted of course, but I knew better than to open my mouth. Not when things could end really badly for me.

Dante gestured Father closer and they talked quietly for a moment. Father didn’t look pleased in the least.

“I won’t make this an official Outfit matter. I won’t stop you from going through with the wedding. If you don’t, however, I won’t have a choice but to punish you,” Dante said to me. He nodded toward Matteo before turning to my father once again. “I’ll hand this over to you since Gianna is your family, and I hope at the end of this day there’ll be an agreement that allows us to work together peacefully.” With that he stepped back and motioned for Father to take over.

“Can you really afford to welcome someone like Gianna to New York? As a new Capo your people expect you to protect traditions and treat traitors without mercy,” Father said to Luca.

“My men accept my decisions,” Luca said, but there was a hint of warning in his voice. “Whatever that decision will be.”

Suddenly I wondered if Luca would really burden himself with me. It wasn’t like I wanted to become part of the Cosa Nostra, but if the choice was between staying in my father’s territory and living in New York with Aria, then I knew what I’d choose.

Looking like he was on the verge of pulling his knives, Matteo walked over to Luca to discuss something quietly and Aria used the moment to join me. I gave her a grateful smile.

“My brother will take your daughter off your hands, despite her transgressions. I think that’s a very generous offer on our part. You should be glad that you don’t have to look for a new husband for her.”

Father scoffed. “As if I’d find someone. I wouldn’t waste my precious time like that.”

My blood was boiling, not only because of Father’s words, but Luca’s offer didn’t sit well with me either. They acted like I was a piece of scum. Listening to them made me realize I had been right to run. This world was majorly messed up.

“So what do you say?” Luca asked, lips tight.

Father glanced at his boss but Dante seemed intent to stay out of it. He looked like he couldn’t care less about the result.

“I hope you don’t intend to have a wedding celebration. I want this matter to be dealt with as quietly as possible. She has caused me and the Outfit enough embarrassment already. I won’t give her a chance to shame us further,” Father said eventually.

I gritted my teeth so hard I was surprised my jaw didn’t snap.

Matteo shook his head. “I don’t need a wedding party. I prefer getting drunk without the old spinsters of the family around anyway.”

A laugh tickled the back of my throat but I swallowed it. Matteo shot me a look as if he wanted to see if I found him as funny as he obviously found himself. Everything he did was calculated. That was something I could never forget. Matteo masked his deadliness with humor and smiles, but I wouldn’t let that fool me. Not now, not ever, especially not when it was obvious he thought he was being generous by taking me back.

“The old spinsters wouldn’t have come anyway. Nobody wants to be associated with someone like her,” Father said with a glare in my general direction.

Aria’s grip on my wrist was steely as if she still didn’t trust me not to viciously attack our father.

“There will be a church service as is tradition,” Luca said. “There’s no need for guests beyond the closest family.”

“Tradition,” Father huffed. “Gianna spat on our traditions. The presentation of the sheets your Familia is so adamant about will have to be cancelled. And a white dress is out of the question too. I won’t have her make a mockery out of our values.”

Luca nodded. “That’s reasonable.”

Aria gave her husband an incredulous look, but I wasn’t surprised that I wouldn’t be allowed to dress in white. As if I gave a damn. For all I cared I would marry naked. I didn’t want any of this. And I didn’t give a fuck about their stupid traditions. They acted like they were doing me a favor, as if I was a criminal on death row who was handed a pardon on a silver platter. I’d done nothing wrong, nothing compared to what each of the men in this room had done.

“She’s probably let every man in Europe have her, and you still want her?” Father asked again. I knew he was doing it to shame me and hurt me, and I hated it that he wasn’t entirely unsuccessful.

I stared at the man who was my father, and felt nothing. I’d always known he didn’t like me much, but I’d never realized how much he despised me. I sunk my nails into the soft flesh of my palms.

Matteo stood tall with that twisted smile on his face. “I hunted her for six months. If I didn’t want her, do you really think I would have wasted so much time on her? I’ve got better things to do.”

If I heard that one more time, I’d completely lose it.

“I thought you were looking for revenge, but my men told me you didn’t lay a finger on her.” Father directed a hard look at me. “Then again, you probably didn’t want to get your hands dirty. I don’t think a simple shower is going to wash my daughter clean again.”

Aria gripped my wrist even tighter, and I halted. I hadn’t even realized I’d taken a step toward our father to do…I wasn’t even sure what I would have done. Hit him? Maybe. His words and expression made me actually feel dirty, and I hated that he had that power over me. At the same time I’d have rather thrown myself off the roof of this house than admitted that I hadn’t slept with any guy while I was on the run. That was a secret I’d protect with all my might.

“Who says I’m not still out for revenge?” Matteo asked in a dangerous voice. His dark eyes met mine. The bastard. So the concerned looks in the car had been all for show? He knew I didn’t want to marry him. He knew this was a punishment for me. Who knew what else he had in mind for me once I was in his clutches?

“I won’t marry anyone,” I snapped. “This is my life.”

Father looked livid as he stomped toward me and slapped me hard across the face. My ears rang and the taste of copper filled my mouth. A long time and many slaps ago, I would have cried.

“You will do as I say. You soiled our name and my honor enough as it is. I won’t tolerate your insolence a day longer,” he growled, face bright red.

“What if I don’t?”

My wrist was almost numb from Aria’s crushing grip. She’d managed to position herself halfway between Father and me, despite Luca’s obvious disapproval but he was busy holding Matteo’s shirt in an iron grip.

I tried to tug Aria back but never took my eyes off Father. Aria was still trying to protect me but this was a battle she couldn’t fight for me.

Father’s hand was still raised, ready to hit me again. What would he do if I hit him back? I wished I were brave enough to find out.

“For your betrayal nobody would blink an eye if I gave you to one of the Outfit’s sex clubs, so we can make use out of your promiscuity.”

Despite my best intentions, shock widened my eyes. Dante frowned but I wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not.

Matteo’s eyes were burning with so much hatred that the hairs in the back of my neck rose. Luca was still gripping his shoulder, stopping him from what? I wasn’t really sure. “That won’t happen. Gianna will become my wife. Today,” Matteo said.

“What? I–” I blurted but Father’s slap silenced me again. It was harder than before and his ring caught my lower lip. Pain burst through my face and warm liquid trickled down my chin.

“That’s enough,” Aria said, and suddenly Luca was pulling her back and Matteo was gripping my arm tightly and leading me out of the room and down the hall toward the bathroom. I wasn’t sure if it was the shock of what had happened or the speed in which Matteo dragged me away, but I didn’t fight him, only stumbled along, not even bothering to stop blood from dripping onto my shirt from my split lip. Matteo shoved me into the bathroom, then entered after me and locked the door.

I stared at my image in the mirror. My chin was covered in blood and more blood was dripping from the cut in my lower lip and onto my shirt. My lip was already swelling, but I was happy to find my eyes dry, no sign of a single tear. Matteo appeared behind me, towering over me, dark eyes scanning my messed up face. Without his trademark shark-grin and the arrogant amusement, he looked almost tolerable.

“You don’t know when to shut up, do you?” he murmured. His lips turned into a smirk, but it looked somehow wrong. There was something unsettling in his eyes. The look in them reminded me of the one I’d seen when he’d dealt with the Russian captives in the basement.

“Neither do you,” I said, then winced at the pain shooting through my lip.

“True,” he said in a strange voice. Before I had time to react, he gripped my hips, turned me around and hoisted me onto the washstand. “That’s why we are perfect for each other.”

Back was the arrogant smile. The bastard stepped between my legs.

“What are you doing?” I hissed, sliding back from the edge of the washstand to bring more distance between us and pushing against his chest.

He didn’t budge, too strong for me. The smile got bigger. He grabbed my chin and tilted my head up. “I want to take a look at your lip.”

“I don’t need your help now. Maybe you should have stopped my father from busting my lip in the first place.” The taste of blood, sweet and coppery, made my stomach turn and reminded me of darker images.

“Yes. I should have,” he said darkly, his thumb lightly touching my wound as he parted my lips. “If Luca hadn’t held me back, I would have plunged my knife into your father’s fucking back, consequences be damned. Maybe I still will.”

He released my lip and pulled a long curved knife from the holster below his jacket before twisting it in his hand with a calculating look on his face. Then his eyes flickered up to me. “Do you want me to kill him?”

God, yes. I shivered at the sound of Matteo’s voice. I knew it was wrong, but after what Father had said today, I wanted to see him begging for mercy and I knew Matteo was capable of bringing anyone to their knees, and it excited me. That was exactly why I’d wanted out of this life. I had the potential for cruelty, and this life was the reason for it. “That would mean war between Chicago and New York,” I said simply.

“Seeing your father bleed to death at my feet would be worth the risk. You are worth it.”

I wasn’t sure if he was joking or not, but this was getting too…serious. I wanted to kiss him for his words, but it was wrong. Matteo was wrong. Everything was. Not too long ago I’d watched Sid getting killed and I knew it might just as well have been Matteo who’d pulled the trigger. I couldn’t let him mess with my mind. He was too good at it.

I shoved his shoulder again. “I need to take care of my lip. If you have nothing better to do than to stand around, get out of my way.”

He still didn’t budge and he was simply too strong to move him. His muscles flexed under his shirt, making me wonder how he would look without it. Wrong. So wrong.

He set his knife down on the counter beside me.

“You shouldn’t leave sharp objects in my reach when I’m pissed.”

“I think I’ll take the risk,” he said, bracing his palms to both sides of my thighs, leaving me no choice but to lean back to bring some distance between us.

“Stop it,” I growled because he smelled too nice and I felt my body wanting to move closer, then winced again. I brought my hand up and felt my lower lip. It seemed to have swollen even more and it still hadn’t stopped bleeding.

Matteo pulled my hand away. “You’ll make it worse. It needs stitches. Should I call for a doctor?”

“No,” I said quickly. I didn’t want any more people to find out, and most of all I didn’t want my bastard of a father to find out he’d managed to split my lip. “I’ll do it myself.”

Matteo raised his eyebrows. He took a step back and did a quick scan of the cupboards before he came up with a medical kit. He threaded a needle and handed it to me. I shifted on the washstand to see myself in the mirror, then brought the needle up to my lip. I’d never stitched anyone up, least of all myself. I hated needles. I even had to close my eyes when I got a shot. Matteo was watching me and I didn’t want to look like a wimp to him, so I nudged my lip with the tip of the needle, jumped from pain and pulled back again.

“Fuck. That hurts like hell.” I flushed, then glared at Matteo. “Go on. Laugh.”

Matteo snatched the needle out of my hand. “This isn’t going to work.”

“I know,” I muttered. “Can you do it?”

“It’ll be painful. I don’t have anything against the pain.”

“Have you ever stitched yourself up?”

“A few times.”

“Then I can handle you stitching me up. Just do it.”

He handed me Tylenol. “Pop a few of them. They won’t help with the immediate pain but they’ll be good later.”

“Vodka works too.”

“I guess you found out in your months as a fugitive,” he said with a grin that bordered on scary. He hadn’t asked too many questions yet. Not even about other guys besides Sid. Maybe he didn’t want to know, and I wouldn’t tell him anyway. It was bad enough that one innocent had lost his life because of me. I wouldn’t tell him the names of the other guys I’d kissed so he’d kill them too. Death was too harsh a punishment for a kiss, for anything really, but that wasn’t something a man like Matteo would agree on.

“Among other things,” I said because I never knew when to shut my mouth. And what better moment to choose for provoking someone than before they were going to poke you with a sharp needle.

“I bet,” he said, the scary smile getting a bit scarier. Matteo cupped my chin. “Try to hold still.”

I braced myself as he touched the needle to my lip. Despite my taunting, Matteo was careful when he stitched me up. It still hurt like hell every time the needle pierced my skin and my eyes filled with stupid tears. I fought them for as long as possible but eventually a few trailed down my cheeks. Matteo didn’t comment for which I was glad. For him this was probably nothing. When he set the needle down after what felt like forever but had probably been less than five minutes, I quickly wiped the tears off my cheeks, embarrassed that I’d shown weakness in front of him like that.

“It’ll swell even more. Tomorrow morning you’ll have a fat lip,” Matteo said.

I checked my reflection. My lip had already swollen considerably since I’d last seen it, or maybe that was my imagination. I pulled down my lower lip to check the stitches. You couldn’t see them from the outside. At least I wouldn’t have an ugly scar. “You can’t possibly want to marry me looking like this.” I pointed at my face. “We should postpone the wedding.”

Matteo shook his head with a small laugh. “No chance in hell. You won’t slip out of my hands again, Gianna. We will marry today. Nothing will stop me.”