I Left Her
â¢â¢â¢
Derek POV
What have I done?
What have I done to Rachel?
I question myself over and over again during the ride back to New York with the helicopter. The sound of the chopper is extremely loud, even better, puts my thoughts off a little while.
'Locate Tores.' I asked Joe through the earphone speaker.
'Tores is on her way back to New York, exact location, Long Island Expressway, Sir.'
I gave no reply after that. Gavinski is focusing on his phone, his face is thoroughly stress out, like a nanny who is worried that the baby's parents would find out about the spoilt milk she accidentally fed the baby.
Strange enough, while the pressure of being discovered weighs a Thor's equivalent of force, Rachel is all that shows up in my mind. She is angry, hurt and damaged. She has always been damaged, but I puts her life into another dire stage.
I left her. I put her second in my priority.
'We have arrived, Sir.' Alan announced. I looked down and the helipad of the hotel I am arriving in is a mere distance away. I unbuckled my seat as soon as we touched down. I put on my sunglasses, not in the mood to mingle with anybody. We head straight to Grace's room.
Gavinski and I looked solemn as we stepped inside. It wasn't only Grace, who sat on the grey French armchair, lips were pursed, arms folded, with a disgruntled look that is threatening to pour all over me, the head of my PR team, Ferguson and her secretary is here.
Without any warm greeting, crisis meeting starts.
'Is that you on the picture, Mr. President?' Ferguson asked with her hands clasp together. The whole room is silent, waiting for me to answer. This is the crucial part and I can't lie to them if I wanted to solve this as quickly as possible, anymore delay will stir more unnecessary scandal.
'Yes.' I snapped.
'Who is the woman beside you?' Ferguson adds. I look at her like a criminal being investigated. I was filled with hesitation to disclose Rachel's identity. But eventually, I will have to spill out. But letting Grace knows about Rachel does worries me. I cannot be sure about what Grace is capable of doing.
'Derek, Sir?' Ferguson rushes me, in a heavy tone.
'Rachel Woods. The flight attendant in Air Force One.' I answered, slightly irritated. I can see the Ferguson remains calm and nodded, like she has been immune to it. This is her job, and she is set to solve it at all cost. But, Grace? Her volcano is erupting, like right now, this moment.
'The Rachel that took the flight with us?' Grace sat upright immediately. 'She is your mistress?' She spat the word "mistress" with disgust. 'You took her with us?' Every words she fires at me send the hates she is feeling now.
'Yes, I did. Pretty much everyone in this room knows we are a fake couple, Grace. This marriage is no different from a partnership, we are partners. So, whatever I did behind you is not something that I should be guilty of.' I pointed out with louder voice. Both Grace and I were agitated. I said before, every heated arguments between us will only left one question to be ask; who shall be murdered first.
Gavinski and the rest remained silent, and its not the first time either. Gavinski cleared his voice, I sensed he is going to start talking.
'Leave that out first, will you?' He gestured two hands to us like a referee, a sign for us to stop the argue. 'Now, Ferguson, what is your plan?'
Ferguson looks as everyone, as if she is waiting for the coast to be clear, so she is safe to starts the agenda for today. 'The CCTV was taken at one-thirty four, and Grace were seen at the MoMA at four. We need to create an alibi for Derek.'
'Obviously, he needs someone to cover up the pants he forgot to zip.' Grace folded her arms, still looking extremely upset.
I ignore her acidic comments, because it's not useful at all.
'Rachel actually gave me her white dress. What do you think we can do with this?'
The white dress, brings back a lot of feeling. She wore that dress while we were inside the car, the only time we are able to be out in the road for that long.
'Well at least, Grace can wear that dress, and twist the story that Grace is inside the car with Derek.' Ferguson suggested.
'Don't even think about that, I'm not going to wear the dress of the person my husband is screwing with.' Grace throws her hand to show protest.
'Well, it's the least you could do, Grace. As simple as that, we could say Derek brings you on a secret date, the timing is impeccable.'
Grace frowns slightly, but she is absorbing what Ferguson said.
'The Press Secretary has been calling many times, the reporters were firing questions at him and he could reveal nothing at this moment, we need to act fast, it's still early.' Ferguson quips.
'We don't have to answer them. Why do we have to?' We all turn to look at Grace, as if she is out of her mind. 'There is a Chinese proverbs which says, there is not wave without wind. Right here, the more we try to buy our way out, the more suspicious we look. And the dress, if I wear it, the more obvious I'm trying to hide and prove something. I'll say we don't respond. There is always a huge different between yes and guessing. As long as we stand firm, we don't have to prove anything.' Grace's voice is stern and dominating, but I have to admit her idea is right. We are partners after all, if anything shall happen to me, her dream of becoming the next President will be shattered. She have to set my foundation strong, this is her existence in my life.
I tucked one of my arms on my chest, and the other one rubbing my chin. Nobody said anything after that, they were thinking. 'We don't have to prove anything.' I said. Seems like we are all thinking in one mind.
'Tonight we should fly back to D.C, that's more sensible. But it has to be discreet. Can we do that, Ferguson?' Gavinski asked.
'Absolutely.' Ferguson locked her iPad, stood with her secretary and left the room.
It's all the three of us again. I have a sense that Grace isn't going to let me leave without further arguments.
'I don't wish to be in the same flight as her.' Grace said coldly. I sigh. I don't wish to fight with Grace anymore, I'm thinking about Rachel all the time, I don't have the strength to go through this every time with Grace.
'Leave us alone, will you, Thomas?' I asked politely. Gavinski nodded and he left.
Grace sat down on the armchair, crossing her leg, her chest is heaving, it's obviously that she is very mad at me. I took a chair, place it in front of her and sat down.
'Grace?' I call her, I forgotten when was the last time I called her this soft. She isn't willing to face me. 'Look at me, please?'
She went soft and look at me. Her face is foul. 'What?' She pretends to be impatient, while we actually need to sit down and talk.
'I don't wish to fight all the time, Grace. Do you?' I asked her, when she doesn't gave me a reply, I assumed she agree. 'Look, I want to know where we stand in this so called marriage. Grace, I think I really like her.'
Her shoulders loosen up when I told her the last part, she sank onto the back rest. I continues. 'There is no more love between us, Grace. You love power, you have been power hungry and we have been partner all the time, we have done really good so far even when we wish one of us will die on the spot.'
'You, Derek, aside from power, you are still the only man I want to be with, for as long as you are willing to stay, I wanted, no, I WANT you to be my first man when it is my turn to take the throne. I wasn't joking when I said about having baby, because I DON'T want to live by myself anymore, every time it's always me, myself and I in the house you exiled me to.' She held my hand gently. I had a feeling that this talk is heading towards the wrong direction, but I have no heart to reject Grace.
I shut my eyes, for a moment, Rachel keeps appearing in the midst of my thoughts. Her laugher, her smile, her fear when I showed up abruptly without her knowledge, it all makes me wants to protect her all her more. 'I can't, Grace.' I said bitterly. 'I'm sorry.' I shakes me head. I have to stand firm, or else, the two of us will suffer in the end. I can't include Rachel inside the wrecked marriage cycle, because now I'm not sure if she is willing to wait for me again.
Grace looks despair, her eyes gaze at me with overwhelming disappointment.
I remained silent, I'm not sure if the next words I said will hurt her more. I never knew Grace still wanted the contents inside this marriage to be genuine. For long ago, my feelings towards her has faded, we did have something many years ago, but it came to conclusion when I met Rachel. One couldn't love two person at the same time, I'm sure as hell, Rachel is the one I want right now.
'Maybe it's just a summer fling, Derek? You are lonely, she is young and beautiful.' Grace still not willing to give up, when she said the word "beautiful", it was said with obvious jealousy.
'But one thing I know for sure, this thing between us is done.' I sigh. It's not easy, but it felt good to spill everything out. 'We can remained like this, until my term ends, or my re-elected term ends. We are partners.' I offered my hand for her to shake, initiating our newly established partnership.
Grace scoffed, pushes herself up from the chair and storms out of the room. I let her be. Grace's pride is too strong to admit about the things she couldn't get. She needs time.
I sat in the room myself. Reading Rachel's text, wondering if she has reached New York City. This accident puts my thoughts into a different perspective. I sacrifice Rachel for my career, Rachel is right, I didn't puts her as my priority. I was a fool, a coward.