Mentally Screaming
My first reaction is.. Nothing.
I'm really confused. I'm lost.
I don't know what to fucking do at this moment. My heart is beating so fast.
I think it's gonna explode.
His lips feel so soft, though.
"Opal! Do you know if we packed any toilet paper?"
I quickly pull away and stand up from our chair, never looking into his eyes. I don't know what to do.
I quickly rush to my sister's voice.
I find her beside the cabin. She was making her to the back patio.
"Are you okay?" She asks me, giving me a concerned look.
"The- the toilet paper is in the cabin somewhere. I'll show you," I tell her quickly, as I take her hand and lead her back inside. I immediately rush to one of the closets and search for the toilet paper.
There's so much on my mind right now. He kissed me. Nathan freaking Adams kissed me.
"Woah chill, Opal," Gemma says, resting her hand on my shoulder. "You going through the stuff like a mad person."
I find a roll of toilet paper and turn around. "Here," I tell her, shoving it to her.
She doesn't take it, though. "Are you gonna cry?" She asks me.
Everyone that's currently in the cabin turned to me as Gemma asks me that. I catch Bella's stare, and she looks confused as I am right now.
Then we all hear the front door open, as Nathan walks in.
His eyes meet mine, and I can't breathe. Why the hell am I acting like this?
"Opal," Gemma says, making me turn back to her.
"I want to go sleep now, please," I tell her quietly.
"Um, okay. C'mon," she says, leading me to the room where we'll be sleeping, including Bella and Princess.
"Are you okay?" Gemma asks me once again, as she closes the door. I start pacing back and forth in the room.
"I'm fine," I state, as both of hands run through hair.
"Shut up with the bullshit and tell me what's wrong," she says, sounding impatient.
I'm taking deep breaths now. "He fucking kissed me," I say quietly.
"What?"
"Nathan kissed me," I say to her, still trying to keep my voice down. "And now I don't know what to do."
Gemma is in front of me now. "He kissed you?"
I let out a groan. "Yes, aren't you listening?"
She grabs my shoulders. "So why are you freaking out? You scared the hell out of me."
"I don't know. I don't know," I say, rubbing my hands together. "It just caught me off guard."
Then it's silent.
We hear a click from the door slowly opening.
Bella and Princess come into view. "Opal what happened?"
They close the door behind them, and I slowly walk up to Bella. I wrap my arms around her, and she immediately hugs me back.
"Is she okay?" I hear Bella whisper to my sister behind me, but I ignore them.
I look up at Princess, and she gently pats my head.
I force a smile at her.
~
So, it's morning. And I don't want to get out if bed.
"Opal, were roasting hot dogs outside," Bella tells me.
"That's nice," I comment under my blanket.
I hear her let out a sigh. "I'll save you one, okay?"
"Thanks," I mumble, and I listen to her footsteps getting softer until they've left the cabin.
I don't know how I feel right now.
He kissed me. So, does that mean he likes me?
The thought makes my heart race.
But I haven't even known him for that long.
I let out a frustrated groan and pull the covers off my head. It's really bright in the room right now, and everybody is outside eating food. Food.
I'm really hungry now.
I force myself to get up and put on a hoodie. But the only one I can use is Nathan's.
With no other choice, I pull it over my head and fix my hair into a ponytail.
I make my way outside to the back patio.
Everyone's out here, including him.
Bella turns to me. "The bear has awoken," she claims and hands me a cooked hotdog on a stick.
My eyes dared to take a glance at Nathan. He talking with Will, as they laugh about something I can't hear.
I start eating my food. "So when are we leaving?" I ask.
"Around the afternoon," Kyle replies, as he keeps his eyes on his phone.
I nod my head and take another bite.
~
The car ride is surprisingly silent. Having it be this quiet is actually scaring me.
"Who wants Pepsi?" Derek asks from the back.
"I do," Will replies.
"Same," Bella says sleepily.
After what seems like hours, the van slowly pulls up on Kyle's driveway. "We're home," he announces, as he turns off the engine.
Everyone lazily gets out and grabs their belongings. Then we all make our way back home. Gemma, Nathan and I all start walking, since we all live on the same street.
I keep my eyes on the ground, focusing on every crack on the sidewalk. And we finally arrive to our houses. "Happy Birthday, Nathan!" Gemma calls out behind us.
I take the risk and turn around, and Nathan gives us a wave before stepping into his house.
Once we're inside our own house, I jog upstairs to my room shut the door. Why can I even say anything to him anymore?
I pull at my hair in frustration and mentally scream, knowing that my mom is probably asleep in the room next to mine.
I collapse onto my bed, not really knowing what the hell I should do.
Sleep. But I can't when I have so much on my mind right now.
I don't even feel like crying. This isn't a situation where I cry. It's where I freak the fuck out.
Because the guy that pushed me into the deep end just kissed me on his birthday.
And then there's me, being a dumbass, having no idea what to do about it.
_________________________
A/N: ... ð
lol i feel shitty as I'm writing this. But I hope you liked it. If you didn't, that's fine too âºï¸
I'm trying to focus on school and writing on this book more often, so ð
Leave feedback if you can and I LOVE YOU ALL ð
See you in the next chapter â¨
-Holly Osgood â¤ï¸
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