A week later
I havenât left my room out of pure spite.
Even though there are no more guards at my door, which I assume is because they donât think Iâm an escape risk anymore, I still donât want to leave.
Iâd rather sit here than spend one second in the presence of these assholes who watched me fuck the man who is now ⦠my husband.
My mind still canât wrap itself around the fact that Iâm married. According to the Familyâs rules anyway. None of this would ever hold up in a real court of law.
But what can I do here in the temple? With no power, no weapons, no voice, nothing to defend myself with? Nothing. My only option is to stay here as a sign of protest.
To show them I donât agree with how things go here.
But staying in my room, isolated from everyone else, puts a toll on my mental health. And I donât think I can hold out for much longer.
I breathe out a sigh and gaze through the barred window at the people outside who are merrily going about their day as if thereâs nothing to worry about. But at least theyâre doing something useful, while I sit here and wish someone would do something about the injustice in this community.
Maybe Iâm overthinking things.
Itâs not like any of the patriarchs will suddenly stop going about their daily activities because Iâm moping around in my room, waiting for one of them to actually care.
They never will.
Thereâs no point in waiting here.
Without thinking about it any longer, I turn around and march out of my room. I may not be allowed out of the temple without permission, but I can at least look around the house and see what else there is.
So I walk around aimlessly, looking at all the beautiful paintings while leaning against the banister. Thereâs more downstairs, rooms that Iâve never stepped foot in, so maybe I should have a peek.
âHey.â A familiar voice makes me stop in my tracks.
Patrick.
Heâs leaning against the banister right next to the main staircase that I was just about to descend on my way to the ground floor. âHow do you feel?â he asks.
I glare at him for a second, wondering if he means it or if heâs just messing with me. why would he ask me this now? Itâs not like he was ever interested. âDoes it matter?â
A wicked smile spreads on his lips. âThat depends who you ask.â
I frown. âAre all of you patriarchs so cryptic?â
He laughs. âSounds like youâre getting to know us well.â
I wish. Or maybe not. Iâm not sure right now which one would be better for me at this point. I shrug and place a foot on the stairs.
âWait,â he says, making me stop. âCome here.â
âWhy?â I ask.
âBecause Iâm asking you to,â he says, raising a brow.
I sigh. âOf course ⦠it would be rude of me to deny the request of a patriarch.â
He grins as I walk toward him. âYouâve learned to adapt. I like that.â
I stand in front of him, but for some reason I find it hard to look into his eyes. Maybe itâs the fact that he watched me get fucked.
His hand reaches for my face, and he gently nudges it from side to side.
âHe doesnât hurt you, does he?â he asks. âNoah.â
âWhat?â My eyes widen, but I still wonât look at him. âNo.â
But thatâs a lie. Noah was the one who put me in that suffering hut after all. And somehow, the thought of that place, brings tears to my eyes.
Patrick cocks his head and with just a thumb he brushes away the tear rolling down my cheek. âLying wonât do you any good in this house. But you already know that ⦠Since you belong to Noah,â he muses, and he tips up my chin with a finger, forcing me to look him in the eyes. âYou know how he is.â
âHeâs ⦠my â¦. husband,â I say, but I almost choke on the words.
âExactly. And husbands should treat their wives well. They should be looked after, cared for, and loved. As God told us to,â Patrick says. âHave you read our rules?â
I shake my head. âThe elder wives didnât allow us to read anything when I still lived in the hut. And there are only four fiction books in my room here in the temple.â
âAh, right ⦠I forgot. They donât like to give the women too much to do,â he muses, turning around. âCâmon. Let me show you something.â
He beckons me to follow him into a room with two giant doors on the first floor. When he opens the door, my jaw drops. Behind it are bookcases from the floor to the ceiling all around, filled with books from top to bottom.
âWow â¦â
âI know, right?â he says. âMost of them are books filled with scriptures, rules, and doctrine, but there are a few bookcases dedicated to fiction.â He points to one in the back. âThere.â
I walk in and let my eyes gorge on the beauty thatâs so fragile and scarce in a place like this. My eyes immediately home in on a copy of The Beauty and The Beast sitting on the shelves. I grab it with glee, touching the hard cover with every finger I can just as a reminder that Iâm still alive and that this place exists in the same world as my own reality.
âYou can keep it if you like.â
I jolt up and down from the sudden voice whispering in my ear.
Patrickâs right behind me, and when I glance over my shoulder, heâs smiling at me so gently it makes me clutch the book even closer to my chest.
âThanks,â I say.
âNo need to thank me. Besides, itâs not as if these frumpy old men read actual literature.â
I giggle and cover my mouth to prevent more from spilling out. Itâs a sin to ridicule the patriarchs, let alone laugh out loud at them.
I immediately look around to see if any cameras are watching us, but I canât find any.
âThere are no cameras in here. The library is all about privacy. Amazing, right?â Patrick says. âYou can laugh. I wonât tattle,â he adds. âWhatâs life without a little fun, right?â
I sigh and gaze at the shelf filled with the same books I cherished back at home. âYou seem to be the only man here who thinks that.â
âNah ⦠They just pretend theyâre stuck-up. Makes them feel better.â
âWhy?â I ask, spinning on my heels. âWhy are they like this?â
âTo remain consistent and keep the value of the patriarchs alive.â Patrick glances at the window in the back. âThe people in this community need someone to lead them. Without authority, thereâs only chaos.â
âDid they choose this? Did they all choose you to lead them?â I ask.
He glances at me from the corner of his eyes. âThis community, the Family, is much older than you or I. It spans several decades, and it has several lineages of power.â
My brows furrow. âLike a family tree?â
He nods and walks toward a painting hanging from the wall. âThis here is my great-great-grandma. Married to one of the most powerful presidents this community has ever known.â He points at the framed document next to it. âAnd this here is the patriarchal line. See? This is me, and this is Noah.â He points at both their names, but my eyes canât help but travel up the lines. The man above Noah, named Edward, is a patriarch, who is married to a woman named Catheryn apparently, but I havenât seen any women yet.
âWhere are all the wives?â I ask.
âHere,â Patrick says, pointing at the presidentâs wife ⦠Marsha. Their line seems to have ended, or rather ⦠burned. Because the name underneath those two has been made illegible due to a burn, probably from a cigarette. Strange â¦
âBut where are they in this house?â I ask.
âOh, well they usually stay in their rooms until theyâre needed to attend ceremonies and prayers or they gather in the common wivesâ room,â he explains.
The common wivesâ room? Why did I not know that exists? Maybe I should pay them a visit. See how they think.
Patrick leans in more. âI donât know what they do there, and I donât think I want to know.â
I snort to myself, and he winks at me.
âYouâll probably be expected to join them soon,â he says, sighing. âWhich is a shame if you ask me, because that means I wonât get to hang out with you as much as Iâd like to. Since the common wivesâ room is forbidden to all men.â
âHang out?â I mutter, stuffing the âforbidden to all menâ part in the back of my mind for later. Iâve never heard a patriarch talk about âhanging outâ as if heâs regular guy at a library rather than someone who rules a whole community of people ready to fall at his feet and beg for Godâs favor.
He tucks his hands into his pockets. âYeah ⦠I like you.â
For some reason, a blush spreads on my face, and I canât will it away. He steps closer and places a hand on my cheek. It feels wrong, but at the same time, I donât even care that it is. I want it to be wrong. I want to be defiant. To resist Noahâs rule, for once. And this ⦠this gives me power. By giving in to another man, I take away his.
âI wish you werenât his,â he mutters. âI wouldâve treated you so much better.â
I lean into his palm and close my eyes. âWhat if Noah finds out?â
âHe already knows how I am,â he says. âAnd you should too by now â¦â
When my eyes open again heâs so close I can feel his breath on my skin. âYou should know better than to taunt me. Tempt me ⦠and you get in trouble real quickly,â he muses, stepping so close that he forces me to step back until Iâm backed into the bookshelves with no way out. âBut you like that, donât you? Youâre a mischievous little girl who enjoys getting into trouble.â He places his hands on the shelves behind me, trapping me. âBut why? It canât be because you like me. You know what this place is. You know who brought you here. You donât belong here, and you want to go back.â
I suck in a breath and hold it as heâs right up in my face ⦠discovering all my dirty secrets that I wished I couldâve kept secret, but itâs as if heâs pulled them out of me with just a single look.
âI know what youâre doing, and youâre doing it so well, Iâd almost fall for the trap,â he muses.
Is he talking about the ⦠Ceremony?
When I couldnât stop looking at him?
Patrick pushes himself off me, allowing me to breathe again. âBut Iâm not stupid.â
âI didnâtââ
âI know you never said that. You donât need to. But I saw the way you looked at me in that room â¦â His hand balls into a fist as he stands with his back toward me, all tensed up. âYou donât know what youâve unleashed.â
I shudder in place as the silence is deafening.
âI canât give you what you want,â he says. âNeither can Noah. We are bound by the rules. This community is all we have.â
âYouâre patriarchs. You make the rules.â
âWe bow to the rules, just like anyone else here ⦠as should you.â He looks at me over his shoulder, the judging look in his eyes making me gulp.
âThe Family is everything I have. Everything weâve ever loved. You, an outsider, donât get to decide whatâs good and what is not,â he says.
âHave you ever seen the outside world?â I ask.
He walks to the window, ignoring me completely. I follow suit and look outside at the people like he does.
âItâs a good thing men and women are separated here.â
âWhy is that?â I ask.
âNo one gets hurt,â he replies. âEven here, at the temple, separation keeps us from lashing out. Women do their job; men do their job. Just like down there in the huts. Everyone works hard to keep the community going. No one takes what they donât earn, and no one is owed anything but love from their significant other. No greed. No crimes. Lust is taken care of by the ceremony that takes place each week.â
Each week.
That means Iâve already missed one.
âMen get to fuck to their heartâs desire, and women find a home to belong to. Itâs perfect,â he continues.
âPerfect ⦠except I didnât choose this,â I say through gritted teeth.
He blinks a couple of times. âPerfection comes at a price that not everyoneâs willing to pay.â
âYou want me to be an incubator, just like the rest of them,â I say, gazing at the people down there, wishing I could scream out at them and beg them to come get me, but the windows are sealed tight.
âNo,â he says, and he turns to me and places a hand on my shoulder. âI want you to be a wife. A loving mother. Someone our community can look up to,â he says, clearing his throat. âAnd it seems Noah chose well when he picked you.â I canât help but sense a hint of jealousy in that last statement, but he immediately turns around and walks off without saying another word, and itâs hurtful.
I wanted him to be the savior, the one who would fight for me, the one who would take me away from here. But it seems the longer Iâm here, the more Iâm beginning to realize there are no such men in this community. The people in this Family only care about themselves.
âHe didnât pick me,â I call out after him. âI went looking for him myself, after I saw the tattoo on a picture.â
He pauses in his tracks.
âI have a scarf with that same symbol on it.â
His body tenses up. He hasnât moved since I spoke up.
âIt wasnât a coincidence. And neither is us meeting when he first claimed me,â I say. âYou have to help me. I only wanted information. I never wanted to be taken to this place. I never wanted to be here ⦠Please â¦â
His shoulders slump. He sighs.
And then he walks off, leaving me alone, stripped of all my personal feelings, worries, and wishes. Itâs almost as if he had it all planned.