They pulled up to the agency with plenty of time to spare. Wade was a stickler when it came to being punctual. Jackie had Catherine wait in the sitting area while she went back to Wade's office. After a few minutes, Catherine got bored so she began catching up on her email. She had a few emails from some of the staff at Stanford asking if they could pass along her information. She began to get excited, hoping this meant people wanted to work with her. As soon as she got home, she would have to start polishing up her resume, she thought. About an hour later, Jackie came out and got her.
"Sorry it took so long. Wade wants to meet you," Jackie said.
They walked down a hall lined with framed photos of actors and before Catherine could ask Jackie what she should say, they entered Wade's office. He was sitting behind the desk typing on his computer with a Bluetooth headset clipped on his ear. He looked exactly like she imaged a talent agent would look like.
"Wade, this is Catherine. Catherine, Wade."
"So this is the famous Catherine from Bloomington," he said as he stood up and shook her hand.
Catherine shot Jackie a look, not knowing how much she had told him.
"That's scary," she laughed.
"No, I've only heard great things. It's a pleasure to meet you. Thanks for taking care of our little star while she was in Bloomington."
"It was my pleasure," Catherine replied with a smile, glancing back at Jackie.
"Alright. Well, we're out of here. We have dinner plans to get to. Bye Wade," Jackie said, rushing Catherine out the door.
As they were leaving, Wade called Jackie's name.
"Jackie, think hard about this. The Neptune movie was pure luck. Don't let your career disappear again because it may be more permanent this time."
"I will," Jackie replied as she closed the door.
Catherine was curious as to what he meant and wondered why Jackie rushed her out the door so quickly.
"So that's Wade. What all does he know about me?" Catherine asked.
"Just that you're my close friend from Bloomington, who helped me out a lot last year."
"What was he talking about? Not letting your career disappear?"
"The audition I missed today, he wasn't too happy. Sorry I made you wait so long. I didn't think he would lay it into me that hard."
Catherine could tell Jackie was hiding something by the way she was being so short with her.
"Sounds like a pretty important audition. What's it for?"
"We'll talk about it later. Let's go and get some dinner first."
****
Jackie seemed distracted at dinner. She hardly even looked at Catherine the entire time, and kept spacing out. Catherine could tell something serious was up but didn't want to keep trying. She was acting the exact same way she did before telling her about the Neptune movie.
"You okay, Porcupine?" Catherine asked.
"Yeah, I'm sorry," Jackie smiled. "So what do you want to do since it's your last night?"
"It doesn't matter. We can just go back to your place. I don't mind."
"Don't be silly, let's do something fun. It seems like we've spent the last three days locked inside."
She almost made it sound like she was bored with her. Catherine continued to wonder what was causing this sudden shift in her demeanour.
"You pick," Catherine said.
****
Jackie paid for their meal after having to basically tear the bill out of Catherine's hand. It felt good having someone to take care of her for a change, she thought. As they were leaving the restaurant, Catherine grabbed hold of Jackie's hand but Jackie quickly dropped it.
"Catherine," Jackie looked around, "We can't."
Catherine was starting to get agitated and was wondering what was going on because she wanted answers. Obviously something happened in that office. They silently waited for the valet to bring Jackie's car around. As soon as they got in, Catherine couldn't bear it any longer.
"Jackie, is something going on? I don't want to keep prying but you've seemed different since leaving Wade's office, hostile almost."
"Hostile? How am I being hostile to you?"
"You introduced me to Wade for about 5 seconds before literally pushing me out the door. You hardly paid attention to me at dinner, and then when I tried to hold your hand you shooed me away."
"Catherine, you know I'm not public about any of this yet. Don't take it personally, I just have to be careful when we're out."
Catherine suddenly began to feel a familiar feeling. The one she felt after the Neptune party when Jackie introduced her as her college friend, and then ignored her all night. Was this how it was going to be if she moved here?
Jackie looked over and saw Catherine staring out the window.
"Hey," she said softly, as she reached over and grabbed Catherine's hand. "I love you."
"Is that enough?" Catherine quietly sighed.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
As soon as Jackie uttered those words, Catherine felt the déjà vu kick in to their high fight. She thought it best to stop before things go out of hand again.
"Nothing," Catherine replied.
Jackie turned up to a hill and drove down a secluded path. Catherine looked around and was feeling confused.
"Is this the part in the story where you kill me and dump my body? I know I don't have a family, but the dog sitter would at least report me missing. I would hope."
Jackie laughed and then parked the car.
"Come on."
She walked over to Catherine's side of the car, took her by the arm, and led her to a picnic table that looked over the city. Jackie climbed up and sat on top of the table and motioned Catherine to come sit in between her legs on the bench. Catherine hesitated and then sat down. Jackie put her arms around her shoulders and kissed her cheek. She felt Catherine's body tense up.
"Hey...What is it?" Jackie asked, turning her chin to face her.
"You tell me."
"Well, I do need to tell you something but there's obviously something that's bothering you. So I'd rather we fix that first."
Silence. Catherine was trying her hardest not to explode.
"Catherine...?"
She couldn't keep it any longer. "I just didn't realise we would have to hide out again. I didn't know Wade and Matt didn't even know about me."
"I know, I'm sorry. It's just not something I ever got around to tell them. You were out of my life by the time I started working with them, so it never really came up."
"Is this how it's going to be if I move out here? I can't touch you anytime we're in public or around anyone you know? We have to pretend we're just friends?"
Jackie was silent. She didn't know what to say.
Catherine stood up and faced her.
"Well?" Catherine asked.
"I-I don't know. This all happened so quickly that I haven't really had the chance to think about it."
Catherine threw her hands up, "That's great," she sarcastically laughed. "This is exactly why I kept trying to get us to talk. So what else did you have to tell me?"
Jackie was terrified. Catherine was already furious and she knew telling her the details of her audition might drive her away again.
"I don't know if this is a good time."
"No. If you have something to say, then say it. I don't want any more surprises."
Jackie stayed silent, nervously playing with her hands.
"Out with it!"
"Catherine, how can you be so cruel to me after the last 24 hours we just spent together?" Jackie's voice began to crack.
As terrible as she felt hearing Jackie's reaction, her own anxiety was taking control of her.
"Because those 24 hours are going to make it even harder to walk away from this, if we aren't completely open this time around."
"Can you please just calm down first? You're extremely intimidating when you're mad and this isn't the way I wanted to tell you."
Catherine just stared at her, not saying a word. She knew she was right but she couldn't help her temper or fear.
"Okay. The truth is that I missed that audition today on purpose. It's a really big role and would be great for my career but I would have to leave the country for at least 5 months, and I'm not sure I'm willing to do that."
Jackie was too afraid to look up. She felt her throat tighten and tried to fight the feats but couldn't. When she could no longer wipe them away fast enough, she gave up and covered her eyes with her hands.
Catherine was so angry and hurt, but she hadn't seen Jackie cry this hard since she had gotten in that fight with her mum last Thanksgiving. Maybe she had been a little too hard on her.
"I'm so sorry Catherine. A few days ago, we weren't even in each other's lives anymore. Now here we are, and I want nothing more than to be with you, but I don't have the answers to all of your questions."
Catherine realised she was right. She couldn't expect her to have it all figured out when they had just gotten back together last night.
"How is it possible that our student/teacher affair seems so petty now. It turned out that was the least of our worries," Catherine said, while runner one hand through Jackie's hair as the other rested on her hip.
She looked down at Jackie and could see she still had her head down. She slowly made her way over to her and knelt down on the bench in front of her. She lifted Jackie's chin up and looked her in the eyes. They were filled with tears and Catherine felt awful for putting so much pressure on her.
"I'm sorry Jackie, you're right. It's not fair of me to think you had this all figured out. I was just hoping one of us did."
"So what are we going to do, Catherine?"
"Well, you are going to go to that audition tomorrow and nail it," Catherine smiled. "Okay?"
"But I don't want to lose you again."
"Jackie, what happened to not having to make sacrifices? I'm not letting you turn down this role for me."
"Five months is a really long time, especially without you. I would rather sacrifice the movie than you. I know you wouldn't get on a flight that long and I wouldn't be able to come back here."
"For you I would," she smiled. Catherine stood up, "But I'm not travelling across the world for just a friend."
Jackie wrapped her arms around Catherine's waist.
"Please just don't give up on me again."
Catherine's heart broke at the words. She kissed her on the head before sitting next to her.
"This is what we're going to do. I'm going to go back to Bloomington and figure out what I'm going to do with my career. You're going to that audition tomorrow, and any others that come your way, and decide how you want me in your life. But Jackie, I can't sneak around anymore. I did it for so long and it did nothing but cause damage. I just can't live life like that anymore and it's not healthy. I want to be able to kiss you in the middle of the street and spend my life with you."
"I know, I want that too so badly."
The two sat there on the table, trying to enjoy the sunset but they had too much on their minds.
After what they felt like an eternity of silence, Jackie finally spoke.
"I wish we were back in Bloomington. Do you know what I miss the most?"
"What?"
"Walking down the hallways, knowing at any second I could be pulled into a classroom and be completely ravaged by you," she laughed.
Catherine laughed, "Yes, I miss that too. Very much," she said as she bumped her shoulder into Jackie's.
"Can't we just go back to this morning when everything was perfect?"
"I wish, but this is reality."
"Reality sucks."
Catherine thought about what Jackie said, how new and exciting things were when they were in Bloomington. Their relationship had always been so hot and heavy. Just then she got an idea in her head as she looked around.
"You know, it doesn't have to..."
Jackie looked over at Catherine and scrunched her forehead. Catherine slide closer to her with a smirk on her face. She took Jackie's face in her hands and began kissing her slowly. Her lips slid over to Jackie's cheek, then down her neck, and before she knew it, Catherine's hand slipped down her pants.
"Catherine! We can't, we're in a park. We could get arrested for this!"
Catherine laughed as she looked around.
"There's no one here, we'll see the headlights if anyone does show up. Now relax. I thought you missed this?"
Screw it, Jackie thought. She put both hands on Catherine's face and began kissing her deeply. She moaned quietly as Catherine pleasured her. Jackie draped an arm over Catherine and grasped her shoulder, digging her fingers into it. Catherine leaned her face into Jackie's, smiling, then proceeded to kiss her neck.
Jackie breathed heavily into her ear, "Catherine I'm about to.."
Catherine stopped, "No you're not. Not yet..." she said as she quickly pushed Jackie down onto the table.
She climbed on top of her, kissing her neck down to her stomach and then began removing her pants.
"Catherine!"
"Shh...trust me," she smiled.
****
When she finished, Catherine laid down next to her on the table.
"Jesus Christ," Jackie said, putting her hand on her forehead.
"You needed that," Catherine laughed.
"We needed that," she responded, as she leaned over and gave Catherine a kiss.
They both stared up at the stars in silence for a while before Jackie turned over and faced Catherine.
"What am I going to do here without you?" Jackie asked.
"Well, you managed a year without me here already. I'm sure you can survive a little longer," Catherine replied as she tucked a piece of hair behind Jackie's ear.
"Yeah, but we also didn't have the last three days that we just had. I can't just erase that from my mind."
"After what I just did, you better not be able to erase it from your mind," she teased.
Just then they saw headlights coming up the path. Jackie quickly got up from the table.
"Come on, let's get back to my place."
Jackie parked the car and both her and Catherine slowly walked down the street towards her apartment.
"Do you want to stop and get some wine? I'm fresh out at my house." Jackie said, flashing Catherine a guilty smile.
"I'm not sure I trust leaving you with wine in your house," Catherine teased. "Plus you have that big audition tomorrow."
"How about coffee or ice cream? My favourite coffee spot down the street has both."
"Sure," Catherine replied.
"Okay, come on." Jackie said, taking her hand.
Catherine was in shock, looking down at their hands. But as soon as Jackie reached the door, she let go.
"Hi Jackie!" The girl behind the counter greeted her.
"Hi Sarah, how are you?"
"Good! I'm shocked to see you here."
"Yeah, I sure have been busy. Sarah, this is my friend Catherine."
There's that word again, Catherine thought. She knew she needed to be patient with this thought.
"Hi Catherine, it's nice to meet you! I like your necklace!"
"Oh, thanks," Catherine replied, reaching up and touching her necklace.
She wasn't used to people being so friendly to her, especially since most of the people in Bloomington were petrified of her. It was refreshing.
****
After they received their drinks, they continued their way back to Jackie's.
"Are you mad?" Jackie asked.
"Why would I be mad?"
"Because I introduced you as my friend again."
"It stings, but I understand. I wasn't exactly telling my colleagues about you back in Bloomington."
Jackie was becoming paranoid ever since her talk with Catherine. She was scared she was going to lose her. She needed to prove to her that she was serious. As they were approaching an alley, Jackie stopped. She grabbed Catherine's arm and pulled her into it.
"What are you doin-"
Before Catherine could finish, Jackie kissed her.
"Who are you?" Catherine smiled.
Jackie smiled back, grabbed the coffee out of her hand, and then pushed her against the brick wall.
She began kissing down her neck, until someone yelled, "Get a room!" From the sidewalk.
"Jackie, people can see."
"I don't care care," she smiled as she placed her hand behind Catherine's neck.
Catherine just stared into her eyes before saying, "Let's go back to your place now"
Jackie bent down and picked up their cups, then held her arm out for Catherine to grab hold.
"Are you sure?" Catherine asked.
"I've never been more sure, and we're only a block away. Baby steps, right?"
A/n does the park scene remind anyone about the library scene in Bloomington? Thought it would be fun to add it. ð Catherine and Jackie holding hands is something I want to develop in this story.
Thanks for reading my story. Please vote and drop a comment. Comments will help me a lot more than you might think. â¤ï¸