After taking a much needed mini break from Hollywood, Jackie promised Wade and Matt that she would still attend the final Neptune party. Catherine's interview at Stanford was the same day, so Jackie was excited that she would be able to join.
On her last night in Bloomington, Jackie was sitting on the couch with Ethan, drinking a glass of wine while looking at pictures of outfits that Rachel had sent her. Catherine came into the room and joined her on the couch as Jackie showed her the pictures.
"What do you think you want to wear to the party?"
"I've been meaning to talk to you about that."
"If you give me an idea of what you want to wear, I can have Rachel pick out a few different options."
Catherine was nervous but knew it wan't fair to Jackie to ditch her at the last minute. She had to tell her.
"I don't think I'm going to make it."
"What do you mean?" Jackie looked up from her phone, looking confused.
"My Stanford interview is that afternoon."
"I know, the more reason to celebrate. I'll book you a flight or I'll come with you and we can drive back. It's not a premiere so I don't need to be there at any set time."
"I don't know if it's a good idea if I keep showing up at your events. People are going to start to get suspicious, especially since they know you're in a relationship now. You heard what the publicists said, they're going to be watching you like a hawk."
"What's wrong with that? I thought we were moving forward from this?"
"I told you. I wanted to settle into a job before we even play around with the idea of becoming public."
"Playing around with the idea of it? We're back to that?"
Jackie's facial expression began to harden.
"Three weeks ago, you kissed me on the curb in the middle of one of the busiest airports in the world, and now you're telling me that yo don't want to be seen with me in public? Jesus Christ Catherine, you're giving me whiplash!" Jackie said furiously as she stood up. "When is it okay for you to be seen with me? Because I'm exhausted on trying to keep up. Do I need to check in with you everyday now?"
"Honestly, that PR meeting scared the hell out of me Jackie. It seems like no one is in my corner, and hearing how ruthless the media can be absolutely terrifies me. This is my career and life we're talking about."
"I'm in your corner. I've always been in your cogeneration," Jackie said, pounding her fingertip into Catherine's chest. "Willing to do whatever you wanted to do, but from day one you've done nothing but go back and forth. First you tell me we're breaking up because you don't want me to refer you as a 'college buddy'. Then five seconds later, when I tell you I'm completely done with this, you tell me that you don't want to go public. Fast forward almost two years later and here we are again. So which is it, Catherine?"
"It's not that simple! There's a lot to figure out. I've never done this before, let alone with someone like you. You were just supposed to be another one night stand like the rest of them. Then you came along and-"
Jackie interrupter her, "Then I came along and messed up your whole life. I made you lose your job. I ruined everything."
"You know that's not what I mean and you know that's not true. It's just really complicated and I'm trying to figure it all out. Our relationship would be hard enough to explain to people, given our ages and gender, but now that you're back in the spotlight...it's just difficult."
"Well, if it's this difficult being with me then maybe you shouldn't."
"Don't," Catherine replied, shaking her head.
"No, it's fine. It's not like I never had to deal with this before. My own mother couldn't handle this lifestyle so I don't know why I expected you to be able to."
Jackie set the wine glass down on the table and headed upstairs.
"Where are you going?"
"Home."
****
Not even a minute later, she came back down with her bag in her hand.
"Jackie stop. You're blowing this all out of proportion. Do you not understand how difficult this is for me? You heard the publicists. If the media gets a hold of my past, they'll make me out to be a predator."
"Yes, because I'm just a child," Jackie said smugly.
"Can you please stop! Stop putting words in my mouth. It's not fair."
"Fair? You have the right to decide what's fair with the way you've treated this entire relationship?"
"You're forgetting on who left in the first place!" Catherine blurted out in defence, regretting it as soon as the words escaped her mouth.
Jackie's eyes almost doubled in size and her mouth dropped.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I'm just feeling attacked right now."
Jackie just looked at her and then clenched her jaw.
"Good luck at your interview," she said as she stormed out, slamming the door behind her.
****
Catherine let out a sigh and took a minute to gather herself before going outside. Jackie was at the bottom of the drive way on the phone. When she got closer, she realised she was talking with the airlines to try and get an earlier flight. She grabbed the phone from her hand.
"Never mind, thanks for the help," Catherine told the operator before hanging up.
"What the hell are you doing? Give it back!"
"Jackie, you're not leaving. It's late and you're angry. I'll drive you to the airport tomorrow."
"I don't want to be here!"
"Either keep your voice down or come inside," Catherine snapped.
"Take me to a hotel."
"No."
"Then give me my phone back so I can call a cab," Jackie said, holding out her hand.
Catherine turned away and walked inside with Jackie's phone in her hand. She wasn't letting her leave this upset.
"Catherine. Give me my fucking phone!" Jackie yelled as she stormed back into the house.
"No. Not until you calm down."
Jackie went over to the couch and angrily sat down as she rested her chin on her fist.
"I don't want you leaving like this."
Jackie stayed silent. Not even looking at her.
"I'm really scared Jackie. I'm scared that I will lose my job again, so I'm being a coward. I admit it but that doesn't mean I don't want to be with you. I'm scared to lose you too."
"Is this why we stayed in the hotel almost the entire time we were at Berkeley? You didn't want anyone to see me with you?" Jackie asked, as she snapped her head towards her.
Catherine just looked at her, not knowing what to say. She had obviously been holding that in for a few weeks.
"You're ashamed to be seen with me?"
"Of course not," Catherine replied as she sat down next to her. "I don't want anything more than to be with you. That's exactly why I keep going from one extreme to another. Anytime I'm with you, I just want to be with you, but then I think of the worst case scenario that your publicists warned us about."
"So what's the end game here Catherine? I can't change my age or gender. Do you want me to quit acting? I know that's it because let's be honest, you've been hanging the fact that I left over my head this entire time. As soon as I took the job, you began punishing me and pushing me away."
"No. I don't want you to sacrifice anything, and I just wish you would reciprocate that feeling."
Jackie looked at her.
"So what? You want me to start bringing Tommy as my date to events again?"
"Now you're just being hateful."
Jackie got up from the couch and started walking out of the living room.
"Where are you going now?"
"If you're not going to let me leave, then I'm going to bed."
Catherine stayed downstairs to give Jackie the space she needed to cool off. When she finally went upstairs, Jackie wasn't in her bed. She walked down the hall and slowly opened the door to the guest bedroom.
Jackie was fast asleep.
She quietly tip toed to the side of the bed and placed Jackie's phone on the nightstand. It took everything she had in her, not to curl up in bed next to her but she was hoping by morning that she would be more level headed.
****
Catherine woke up, not getting much sleep the night before, and opened Jackie's door but the bed was empty. When she went downstairs, there wasn't any sign of her there either. As she looked around the kitchen, she found a note lying on the counter.
Took the cab to the airport
Catherine couldn't believe she left without saying goodbye. She was obviously a lot more hurt than she thought. She went to the door and looked outside, hoping the cab hadn't picked her up yet, but there was no sight of her.
After running upstairs to retrieve her phone, she dialled Jackie's number. As she was pacing the foyer, she suddenly heard a phone ringing from the outside. When she opened the door, relief rushed through her body when she saw Jackie in front of her, sitting on the steps.
"Can I please drive you to the airport?"
"Why? You won't want to be seen with me. I'm just saving you the stress."
"Don't be like this. Are we seriously going to start to part on bad terms?"
Catherine sat down next to her.
"My cab is going to be here any minute so I guess so."
Jackie's arms were crossed as they usually were when she was this angry.
"Can you at least talk to me? I'm not exactly comfortable with the idea of leaving on a bad note when you're about to get on an airplane. My past experiences have taught me to never do that."
"We're obviously on different pages when it comes to out relationship, which is news to me. It would really mean a lot to me for you to be there tomorrow but you're not. So I don't have anything left to say to you right now that won't make things worse."
Catherine stared at her but she wouldn't even look at her.
"I'm sorry for not being able to give you what you want right now," she said softy.
The cab pulled into the drive way and Jackie stood up to leave. Catherine got up and hugged her but Jackie didn't return the embrace.
"I love you," Catherine whispered.
"I love you too, but only saying that because of what you said about airplanes."
Then with that, she was gone. Not even looking back. Even once.
A/n Thanks for reading my story. Please vote and drop a comment. Comments will help me a lot more than you might think. â¤ï¸