Jisoo lived her life with happiness with Taehyung, just like how she used to dream to lead, though an unknown secret tension worked inside her everytime, but she shrugged it off not caring about her and living every moment forever.
People's opinion about them started to change as the truth is already out of the lies. But, the difficulty is still happening due to Jisoo being the princess of the enemy kingdom.
When it was revealed, the vassals couldn't accept the fact, but soon, they started realizing Jisoo's soft and kind nature. The human beings divided into supporting and accepting the princess and to hate her due to her identity.
It was said that the Queen, Irene accepted their marriage, but who knows what consequences she would feel later?
For now, everything seems okay despite the controversies of some people around both of the kingdoms.
But, King Seokjin hasn't uttered anything according to this yet, or not even the Queen Irene. Their silence is driving the other royals into a confusion whether they would become allies or not.
In all of these hazards, Jisoo only feels her comfort in Tae. She loves him more than anything.
Like this, in an indifferent morning, Jisoo roamed around the store room for something necessary that she lost. She began searching for it until she conquered a diary inside a bag. She looked at it for seconds, it looks very familiar, she saw it before.
Jisoo opened the diary to see inside. She turned the cover. She was hit by realization as she noticed that there's written "Jungkook", it's Jungkook's notebook.
Jisoo immediately got reminded of the day, when Jungkook let her go, but before that, he handed her a diary which is infront of her right now. He told her to read it whenever she gets time.
Jisoo took a deep breath and slowly closed Jungkook's diary. She doesn't want to recall those days and especially Jungkook, she doesn't want to know what does the diary contain.
She placed the diary in the bag just like it was before. She breathed a little heavy and walked out of the room.
The whole day, she again felt weird. She doesn't know why, but not reading the diary made her feeling like this for sure.
A bit confusion, thoughts and conundrum let her fall into this weird feeling of hesitation and finicky.
What he might write there? there's no ending of her thoughts, and why he would give me this if he hates me? What is he trying to say?
Jisoo let her go inside the store room and give hand to the diary again. She bit her lower lip in nervousness, she is feeling nervous all of sudden, but she's unknown of the reason.
She sighed and again opened the diary. She turn the first page revealing Jungkook's curved beautiful handwriting.
Jisoo's eyes sparkled as she noticed his handwriting so aesthetic. She conquered his handwriting patiently and praised them.
He only wrote one beautiful sentence in the first page, "Possessiveness is not love, love is to let the people you love, love whom they love."
Jisoo patiently read it. She noticed the date that he added after writing the sentence, "January 2, 2020".
He wrote it many years ago possibly. She stared at the line and decided to turn the page and read ahead.
She hesitantly turned the page and saw a beautifully written poem by Jungkook.
She read the name of the poem in her mind, "Will you be mine?"
Jisoo's heart started to beat faster, she placed her hand over her heart trying hard make it normal, and she succeeded.
She read the first four lines of the poem,
"Through the odyssey and
the ecstatic feist,
I found you crying
in the corner of the mist."
Jisoo stopped immediately, she can feel this more of a poem, maybe a feeling that is hidden down inside it. Her brain is telling her to stop right here and not to read ahead, but she managed herself and started,
"Will you be mine?"
"Through the Odyssey and
the ecstatic feist,
I found you crying
in the corner of the mist.
Ignited my euphoria,
benevolence and all.
I heard the shore and
the reincarnation's call.
My priori for you was
just pitch and fragile.
Sequin smile appeared
and vanished for awhile.
When I saw you barefoot
and desperate at times,
my silence for you was
just a hint for the rhymes.
My obsession for you has
reached me towards you,
but you cried and rejected
to take me to the hue.
My heart now wants you
to see blues and greys,
but you gaze and walk away
to the lavender haze.
My rapturous feelings
have turned into the mist,
withering heart, bloodstain,
and turned into the hist.
Cobblestones tell the story
of the blue mirage I see,
the conspiracies I made
that stopped you to be free.
Desire and prayer for you
won't make the clarity,
the reflected destiny or
the convicted dignity.
I purple you to the end,
you wandering and why?
Cause I love you and
will you be mine?
Jisoo finished reading the poem, she caressed the page, how beautifully written! Jisoo uttered in her mind. She became curious to to know what more can it be ahead.
She turned over the page and saw something that she even thought of.
Jisoo flinched in surprise as she looked at it, she was never ready for such moments, never ever in her life. She started to read from the first line of the page,
"Dear Jisooya,
By the time you are reading this, you may be very far away from me. I don't know how are you feeling right now while holding the diary. In fact, I don't even know if you ever remind to read this, or not.
But, I just need to tell you, I can't hold back my pain anymore. There are moments in life when words become the only way to express the chaos within.
The day I first saw you, I was just a drowned man with so many mixed feelings inside. I didn't know that you'd be this special for me in times.
The day, I got to know that you're nothing but my enemy, I only grew hatred inside me, not knowing how much this hatred would lead me. Gradually, the patience in me collapsed, and I did the very worst mistake of my life.
I hated natural, disguised and married you somehow to make you suffer, I wanted to show you that you deserved nothing but hatred, I wanted to despise you, hurt you, and Taehyung as well.
As the time flew, I saw your steadiness, and hatred for me, it was natural, cause I hurt you. You loved Taehyung and it didn't hide from my eyes. Everything with my intentions were okay, until the day I got to know you're another identity.
Remember me, Sooya? Kookie, only 12 years old, the little boy.
Remember the day when he saw you in the woods, all crying and sobbing while hugging her legs? He came closer to her, you were terrified, you stepped back crying even more.
He became clueless for a moment, not knowing how to help the pathetic girl infront of him. So, he forwarded his hand, trying to make an effective impression, so that you reduce the creeping fear. But he failed, you cried more. He went back to a tree and climbed it, I plucked a flower and forwarded to you, but then, you smiled and gladly accepted.
He smiled back, "What is your name?" "Sooya!" you said and chuckled. "Oh! I'm Kookie," the boy said.
Remember me, Sooya? I am your Kookie.
Remember the days when we first met, you got lost in the woods, and I was there for a visit, it made us meet for the first time, I know, it was unexpected, but it wasn't unlovable. That day, you left me when your brother found you back.
And, after the day I met you, I couldn't forget you. You came to my dreams, my imaginations and everywhere. Your face fluttered in my mind.
And you know what? It made me suffer more inside, when I looked at the woods from the top of my palace, trying to figure you out in the woods. But, I wasn't sure what was that feeling that time.
But, one day, I managed to go there again and hesitantly looked for you in the woods, I wasn't sure to see you there, but still, I did.
And surprisingly, you also went there with your brother just like that day. I hesitated to talk to you as your brother was there, holding your hand tightly, I just took glances from afar, how beautiful you are.
But, suddenly, you looked at me, and I became unprepared of the situation. I don't know why, but I felt a strongly weird feeling inside my heart, it never happened before.
You came closer to me alone, and smiled at which I smiled. That day, we became friends and made a deal to meet each other every afternoon there. We made this deal for our friendship, but for me, it was a lovely excuse to see you everyday. And a friendship bracelet that you made for us contained all the memories.
But, someday came when suddenly your brother asked me about my kingdom. I gladly answered him, but his face gloomed, and I understood it very well.
He said, "Soo, ahm, let's go, it's time for our leaving." You wanted to stay with me, but he kinda forcefully grabbed your hand and walked away.
I never really thought extreme that day about this, but then, I realized, you stopped coming to the forest and meet me, you stopped playing with me. I waited till the sun went down, but you never came back, not just that day, never ever.
I slowly became distracted from my studies and activities. Mom noticed me closely and asked me several times, but I refused. But, I couldn't help but to share everything with her, because, she is the one who raised me after my dad's death.
She listened to me carefully, I explained everything. She slowly nodded her head and made a cold face, and said, "If she doesn't care about you, you don't have to either."
I thought, she would say something bit different. The days later, I wanted to go there again, but, that time, my mom also stopped me. When I forced to go there, she restricted the area for me and all of the other vassals of the kingdom.
I asked her, "Why mom? Why can't I go there?"
But, she refused to talk. Difficulty happened when I realized, my mom also didn't want me to meet you. I reduced my meals and delayed everything harming my health.
Mom understood my stubbornness, she did everything for me to recover, but never permitted me to go and meet you.
To erase my mind, she forcefully sent me abroad. I don't know how much she succeeded, but she couldn't erase you from my mind completely as you still held a precious portion of mg heart. But, I didn't know thag I would get my Sooya back, I didn't know that I would get you back, Jisoo.
The day, I carried you forcefully to the tower, I really looked at you closely, you seemed familiar, but, I couldn't recognize until the day I found an old little wooden box in your bag. Curiosity peeked in me, I opened it and just found the bracelet that you made for us years ago. The past flashed in my mind immediately, I remembered everything, Jisoo. I wondered that you kept this bracelet with you.
I thought of sharing everything with you and confess the untold that I love you, but I didn't have the courage because you already love someone else.
I stopped myself many times not to write this to you, but, I couldn't help, Jisoo, I love you more than I can put into words.
I don't know if the childhood did matter to you, but it matters to me, a lot. And whenever I saw your love for Taehyung, I just couldn't take it, my heart ached.
But, I accepted everything, because I hurt you so much, and it hurt me more that I gave pain to my most beloved person, and so, I let you go Jisoo, far away from me. I can't see you in pain anymore.
I know, I don't deserve your love. But, I wish you lead the best life, Jisoo. If you're happy with your loved ones, I am also happy.
From Jungkook
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Hey guys, IDK, how good or bad was the poem, btw, do write some comments at least, guys, writing this ff has turned into a demotivation for me. Please write some comments.