Jo
WHEN I SAID tomorrow, I meant I'd brace up the next day, call Flynn and maybe suggest we meet up for coffee. Then I'd chin up, have a decent conversation with him, tell him I didn't mean any of those things I said that night and whatever happens from there would happen. And that's what I thought would happen.
Instead, I'm standing in his kitchen covered in flour with a wooden spoon in a firm grip in my hand because I'm convinced my friends are out to get me.
Now you may wonder: How ever did we get here?
Simple answer: Ellie.
I woke up this morning with my game face on and then when I grabbed my phone, Ellie had sent me a text with a bunch of pouty emojis attached to it. 'She's having a sleepover with a bunch of friends and wants me to be there. Her parents are having a date night so the house will be free for all.' Now, I never say no to Ellie which is why I heartily told her yes and packed a bunch of stuff in my bag after work. Meeting up with Flynn and talking about us would have to wait and besides, it's also his house so seeing him wouldn't be a problem. It's a Saturday after all and Talia let us off early today. What I wasn't expecting was those bunch of friends to be my bunch of friends.
In other words, Cass, Amanda, Carter and Khalid were already there by the time I got the description of Flynn's house. Cass, Amanda and Khalid already know about Ellie's condition because Flynn stopped hiding it after our encounter with Mrs Lendermann at the hospital. I'd spent a good five minutes admiring the structure of Flynn's house and well, practicing self-control since I'd be in the same space with him for the whole night. So imagine my surprise when I knock, walk in and the first thing that greets me is a slap of cake batter on my face.
Food fight, I tsked. Very mature.
And yet, here I am covered in flour from head to toe because apparently I'm not good at this game. I chuck the spoon into the bowl and whip out a scoop but just before I can aim at the objectâCass's shiny foreheadâI feel something cold and slimy trickling down my head.
I turn around and find the culprit covering her laughter with her hand and backing up against the fridge. Her eyes are slightly teary. She's been laughing so much and it makes me happy. Her enthusiasm makes me laugh and when I do, she bursts out laughing and dodges a chuck of batter from Khalid.
"That's it," I say, dropping the spoon on the counter and plucking out the wet strands of hair from my face. A drop rolls down my nose and finds solace in my mouth. Whatever liquid Ellie dumped on my head, is sweet enough to make me lick my lips again. "I give up."
Cass and Khalid are doubling over in laughter while Amanda lies on the floor with her arms and legs stretched out dramatically. Everyone has some layer of flour on their bodies but it's definitely not as much as mine. Carter walks down the stairs looking very refreshed after having left us with Flynn a few minutes ago to get the batter out of his amazing hair.
He and Flynn had been grabbing blankets from the rooms and bounding the stairs by the time I walked in and both of them had joined the messy shenanigan after they'd set up the fort in the living room.
I look up, expecting to see Flynn behind him but he's alone which means he's still up there for some reason. That's good. It'd be embarrassing to let him see me like this.
"Damn," Carter laughs, trying to step over the mess in the kitchen. "They got you good. You didn't even get one shot?"
I eye his amazing hair which he's currently showing off since he's clean and spotless unlike the rest of us. He tries to help Amanda to her feet and Cass wordlessly walks over to me and hands me a bowl of pancake mix before walking back to Khalid who gives me a thumbs up.
I grin evilly and tap Carter's shoulder with my finger. If I'm being honest, his hair smells amazing. Too bad he's about to smell like pancake. He looks back and his look of distress doesn't last too long. His hands fly up to shield his hair but the damage has already been done.
"Got one now." I laugh, stepping back a little with the empty bowl to catch my breath and Ellie stumbles forward with a grin.
"I took a picture." She says and I give her a high-five before washing my hands under the tap. Carter scrambles away in an attempt to get the goo off his hair while Amanda laughs as she gets to her feet.
"Really though, you need to take a shower." Cass says as I splash water over my face. I'm sticky everywhere and my white dress is ruined. I really shouldn't have worn white and now I regret picking this to wear instead of the lilac tank top and denim overall.
"Yeah, no shit."
"And a change of clothes." Amanda says, dusting her hair with her hands. "We did you dirty."
"You can use my shower," Ellie suggests, shrugging innocently. "But I don't think my clothes will fit."
"It's okay," I say, already grabbing my bag and heading towards the stairs in desperate need of a scrub. "I'll just change into my pj's early." It's already dark outside, which means it's probably almost seven o' clock. Still good enough even though others would change later.
"The room at the end of the hallway." Ellie shouts behind me and I nod, climbing the stairs and leaving them behind me. I smell like cake and orange juice and it makes me hungry but first, I need to get it off me.
Once I get to the end of the hallway, I don't waste time at all before opening the door. What I expect to see is a room painted in pastel shades of pink and purple because apparently, those are Ellie's favorite colors. So I'm a little surprised when I walk in and see shades of white and grey. It's a huge room with a king sized bed sitting right in the middle while a closed French door stands adjacent to it. The covers are rumpled at a corner and aside from that, the bed isn't too rough. There's a guitar sitting on the chair right next to a table and there are a couple of books stacked on it with a pencil jar on top.
I'm not stupid. From the sketchbook on the desk to the painting on the wall, I'm aware that I have walked into the wrong room. Ellie said the room at the end of the hallway but this room smells like Flynn. Except she set me up which of course isn't above her cunning nature.
I don't turn around fast enough because Flynn walks out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel hanging low around his hips with a cloud of steam following him. He doesn't see me because he's scrubbing his face and hair with a towel but it's either he heard me come in or feels my presence because he doesn't bother looking before speaking.
"Ellie, I'm telling mum you refused to eat this afternoon."
"Snitch." Is out of my mouth before I can stop it and I almost want to smack myself on the head. I could have just turned around immediately he mentioned Ellie's name and dashed somewhere else. But no. I had to say something.
He pauses mid-scrub and takes the towel off his face. It's almost comical because when he turns around and meets my gaze, we blush at the same time. And then when I look at his body, the realization of what's happening hits me square in the chest and I want to melt to the floor. I'm standing alone in a room with a hot, shirtless dudeâone in which I have a terrible crush onâwhile all I need is a red wig and probably a round fake nose so I'll finish up my look as a clown covered in cake and flour.
Nope. This isn't humiliating. At all.
I divert my gaze from his pecs and point my thumb towards the door. "Ellie told me her room's at the end of the hallway."
"She means the first room before the stairs. She believes that's the end of the hallway, not here."
"Oh," I say, sounding stupid for some reason. I know he's looking at me and trying his best to be polite enough so as not to laugh but I'm not looking at him because now, all I can think about is him. Walking out of the bathroom with that stupid towel on his waist.
"But you're welcome here." He says, brushing the wet strands of his hair aside. "I've never had a girl in my room before."
I fold my arms and lift my chin. "Never?"
"Never." He repeats, dropping the towel in his hands and walking towards me. Not even the scar on his shoulder makes him look any less attractive. I remain rigid with my arms folded like someone has glued my feet to the floor and even when he's close enough that I can smell him, I don't move. He smells otherworldly good. It's not fair.
He reaches out and brushes his thumb over my collarbone, before showing me his flour covered thumb. Goosebumps break out on my skin. I can't help it. "Especially not one covered in dough."
"Which means you've never had a girl use your shower before?"
"No." He says with a half smile and then I stick out a hand to him. I don't know why but that makes me happy. He takes it and I shake him firmly.
"Congratulations. I'll be the first."
"And hopefully the last."
The tips of my ears grow warm as I retract my hand from his and shut the door. He leads me towards the bathroom and opens the door for me.
He nods towards the bed. "I'll be here if you need me."
I walk into the warmth of the bathroom and shut the door, before leaning against it and let out the breath I was holding. With the rate at which my heart is racing, I might collapse on the floor and die from a heart attack. Whoever comes for my body might see hearts in my lifeless eyes.
Cause of death: A beautiful boy.
When I stand in front of the mirror, I get hit by a wave of déjà vu because this has happened before. Only then, it was in my room and I'd bawled my eyes out before I got to the bathroom. Either way, I'm a mess in both events and he looks great outside the door.
I wash my face immediately and fumble with the zipper of my gown. It opens at first and then just before it gets halfway, it gets stuck and doesn't go down. I tug on it a little harder and after a few minutes of struggling and realizing that it's caught my hair, I find myself twisting on my heels and heading towards the door.
"Hey," I say, as gentle as a dove, immediately I open the door. To my disappointment, he's already clothed in a plan white Tee and loose sweatpants and he's sitting on the bed with a pencil and sketchbook in his hands. He looks up once he hears the creak of the door and gets to his feet.
"My zipper." I start, clearing my throat. "It's stuck. Could you help me with it?"
"Sure." He says as he comes to me while I turn around.
"Thanks." I respond quietly and clamp down on my lip with my teeth when his fingertips brush my skin.
When he touches the zipper, I look over my shoulder. "Go slow. Or you might break it." Under my breath, I whisper, "Or lacerate my skin."
He hears me and chuckles before gathering my hair and gently pushes it over one shoulder. He plucks out the strands of hair between the zipper's teeth and drags it upwards before slowly zipping down to the end. I don't know if it's because I'm not wearing a braâit's not like there's much to hold anywayâand my back is exposed to him or it's because of the proximity between us, but whatever it is makes this feel like one of the most intimate things we've ever done. And it's just him pulling my zipper but I'm a blushing mess under all of this facade I'm putting on.
The straps of the dress keep it straight on my body so I'm not worried about flashing him and ruining his vision anytime soon. Still, I place my hand on my chest before turning around and looking up at him.
"Thanks."
"Mhm." He hums while his eyes roam my face. "Anything else I can help you with?"
"Clean clothes, maybe?" I have clean clothes in my bag. Clean pajamas but he's asked me a question and I really want to wear his clothes again so who am I to say no?
He nods, tucking in his lips to hide his smile and I do the same before I swiftly turn around and march into the bathroom. I get rid of my clothes and step into the shower cubicle before grabbing his liquid soap. There's not much on the shelf and with how nice he smells, I'd expect a whole truck of skincare products in his bathroom.
I take time when I wash the batter off my hair because my curls don't cohabit properly with goo and after a good thirty minutes, I step out of the bathroom with wet hair and a clean towel wrapped around my body. Except, the room's empty when I walk in while a pile of folded clothes sits on the table. I step away from the steam and close the door before heading towards the table and unfolding them.
It's a grey sweatsuit consisting of the sweatshirt folded neatly over the pair of sweatpants. I take them with me to the bathroom assuming that he's gone downstairs to meet everyone else. I'm alone so I don't stop myself from bringing the clothes to my nose and sniffing the familiar scent of him that lingers in the fabric. I put them on and rub my cheeks one more time before getting out of the bathroom.
It's baggy and I like that it is but the pants keep sliding below my waist, so I pull it up to my stomach as I head towards the door and tighten the strings into a complicated knot. It stays, thankfully, and by the time I get to the door, the curtains flapping by the opened French doors catch my eye. They weren't opened when I first came in.
I completely ignore the quote that says 'curiosity kills the cat' and I take a 180 degree to my left and proceed towards the door. There's a balcony behind it that oversees the rest of the house and right beside it, is a staircase that leads to the ground floor. I sigh as I hold the railing and admire the pool below, the trees and everything else I can see from here. It's nice to be rich. Talia's actually a prosecutor and has a law firm in her name. The store was just something she wanted to do for Ellie which is why she's barely ever there and Flynn's dad is an architect so the dreamy house and sleek cars all add up.
Flynn's clothes are warm enough to not send me back inside since there's a chill breeze blowing back and forth. Also, there's a movement in the pool below and when I look down, I really don't expect to see Flynn's lean body in there. However, my elation doesn't last long because he breaks out of the surface with a streak of urgency but it ends as quickly as it comes. He hasn't seen me yet but I don't look away from him even when he gets out of the pool and curses under his breath. He grabs a towel and dries himself up before changing into the earlier clothes he'd been wearing when I came out of the bathroom the first time.
He keeps the towel around his neck and heads up the stairs and that's when he notices me leaning against the railing.
"I saw that." I say when he gets to the balcony and stands in front of me.
He looks sour. "You shouldn't have."
"Yeah, well, God gave me two working eyes. Couldn't help it."
His lips lift just a little bit. "You could have closed them."
"And miss all that testosterone? No, thanks." My mouth is running but the embarrassment quickly disappears when he laughs.
"How long were you in there?"
He frowns again, looking disappointed. "A little longer than five minutes. How long were you watching me?"
I fold my arms against my chest. "A little longer than five seconds and that was impressive."
"What was?" He asks. "I panicked the whole time."
"I don't know, I saw you panic when you got out but it barely lasted a second. When did you try going back to the pool again?"
"A week ago." He says, looking away. "After Ellie left the hospital."
I touch his arm and give him an encouraging smile. "You did that on your own. You'll get better at it if you keep practicing. It won't go away at once."
He holds the ends of the towel on his neck with both hands and grunts. "You sound like my coach."
I smirk and place my hands on the railing behind me. "You wish I was your coach."
That's when he looks me up and down appreciatively and steps a little closer. "You don't need to return my clothes."
"I wasn't planning to."
He looks very pleased with my answer. "Good."
Is this a good time to talk? It's just both of us right now and what if I don't get the courage to say what I want to say anymore? He's looking at me with those beautiful, green eyes of his. They're so expressive and right now, there's awe in them and it makes me a little bit nervous. And sometimes, when I'm nervous, I tend to say a whole lot of crap.
"I have a huge crush on you, Flynn Cauley." I say, breaking the silence. Nope. This is not how I wanted it to go. "Like a major, heart-stopping crush and I think it's time you do something about it."
He doesn't say anything for a brief second but I don't stop talking. It only fuels my anxiety. "It's really serious." I add. "Like it's this bigâ" I spread my arms as wide as I can and Christ, he actually starts blushing. Making him blush makes me blush. I don't know if that makes sense. "Yeah, just so you know. Plus, I didn't mean any of those things I said the other night. You know it yourself. I'm a shit liar. So do something about it dude cos I don't think it's a crush anymore." Because I like you a lot and I miss you a lot and I think about you a lot and I really just want to be with you all the time and kiss you every time I see you.
"You know, one time in 8th grade, we were in special math class and when everyone left, you didn't and when I looked over, you were crying on your desk. Remember?"
'Special math class' was really just a nicer term to describe additional math classes for kids who were just too slow at learning math. But I don't get how this relates to anything. "I do remember being bad at math in 8th grade. I didn't even know you then."
He continues. "We were the only ones left and naturally I thought you were crying because you probably didn't understand algebra or because Hana wasn't in that class with you. So I walked up to you and tried to comfort you but you actually made me cry instead."
I shake my head because the memory isn't coming at all. Dad left when I was in 8th grade so I pretty much had mental breakdowns during classes or bawled my eyes out in the bathroom.
"How?"
He laughs. "Apart from yelling at me to go away, you told me I looked like a bitch."
"Oh my god." I laugh, covering my mouth as I do so. I think I remember something like that but it's kind of faint. "I'm so sorry. That was you? I think I remember feeling bad about it because I usually think about the things I do to people for a long time when I'm mean."
He laughs and tucks my hair behind my ear. "It doesn't matter anymore. My point is, then I had a huge crush on you. But now, I'm in love with you soâ"
He's cut off mid-sentence because I yank him towards me and press my lips against his. My stomach tingles when I kiss him and a buzz runs through my body. It's wild, almost scary even but it's everything I've always wanted. He grins into the kiss but he quickly takes over when he curls his hand around my waist and presses me against him.
His words keep repeating in my ears and when I pull away for air, I almost can't look him directly in the eyes because my cheeks are burning and my heart is palpitating.
He kisses my nose. "Go out with me tomorrow."
"Like a date?"
"Yes, like a real date."
"Okay," I smile bashfully. "But not tomorrow. We have to complete Ellie's bucket list first, then you can take me on a date."
"Fine by me."
"Also, that reminds me. I'm going to help you out with your speech."
He sighs. "Which of them told you?"
"Carter. I thought you were dyslexic."
"Thank you." He says with his mouth against mine. "That means a lot."
I wrap my arms around his neck. "We should join them downstairs."
"Yes," he says, without making any attempts to move. Instead, he leans down and seals our mouths together. "We should."
He sucks briefly on my bottom lip and when my lips part, his tongue heatedly slips against mine. He drags his hand around my body and slides his palm underneath his sweatshirt. He probably doesn't know I feel literal sparks each time his skin is in contact with mine. I slip my fingers into his thick, damp hair and press myself tighter against him to hold the sweatpants because the more he touches me, the lower the waistband of his pants falls below my stomach and a little below my waist.
Crap. I put all my faith in that knot and it's failing me. The shirt is long enough to not reveal anything but it's raised because his hand is still underneath it.
Flynn, however, pulls my lip between his teeth when he sees the sliver of skin and then he pulls away.
"Fuck." He murmurs and I gasp when he traces a full circle around my hips with his finger above the waistband. "You're not wearing anyâ"
I don't let him finish. I think my knees are a little weak. "Of course not, Captain Obvious."
He chuckles and hooks his hands under my legs before lifting me up. I wrap my legs around his waist and bury my face in his neck when he turns around and takes us back inside before shutting the French doors.
"You spoke to my mum, didn't you?" I ask when my back gently hits the soft bed and he smiles while he keeps his weight above me by leaning on his elbows.
"Maybe, maybe not. I did need help trying to win you over."
I snort when I try to imagine the look on her face when he came to her. She must have been excited. I've never brought a boy home before. Not before him.
"What did she tell you?"
"'Bother her with gifts and she'll run. Trying to be in her space all the time might make her even more scared even if she might want it. So, give her time. She just needs to think so don't rush it. Let it come to her naturally. Then you can make a move.' That's the summary of all she said."
"Okay," I laugh. "So maybe she does know a few things about me."
Someone knocks repeatedly on the door and Flynn lifts his head from my neck. I close my eyes when I remember what I'm really here for. And that's a sleepover with Ellie and not making out with her brother on his bed.
"I think two hours is more than enough to pull whatever stunt it is you both are practicing in there." That's Khalid's voice. My eyes widen when he says how long I've been here and I roll away from Flynn and sit upright.
"Two hours?! Was it that long?" I whisper and he beams.
"Apparently. Not long enough."
"Shut up." I blush before getting to my feet. "I'll go first. I don't want to do the walk of shame with you in front of your sister."
He sits upright with his feet on the floor and I stand between his legs and fluff my hair. "How do I look?"
"Like you've been kissed." He says, pulling the pants higher up my hips and fixing the drawstrings into a firm knot. "Multiple times."
I narrow my eyes at him and point a finger towards him so he'll stay back as I walk backwards to the door. He gets to his feet and I point two fingers instead. "Don't you dare."
Quickly, I slip out of the room and meet Khalid's sly grin behind the door.
"What?"
"Everybody knows."
I feign ignorance as I pull him down the stairs. "Knows what?"
The closer we get to the ground floor, the louder Cass and Ellie's voices become. I hear Amanda protest loudly about something and then Carter bursts into a fit of laughter.
"I love your pj's." Cass says immediately she sees me and I smile coyly because I know she's referring to Flynn's clothes.
The blanket fort is beautiful and big enough to accommodate everyone and Cass is currently trying to imitate an object in a charades game. Amanda gets to her feet and walks over to me with two dishes with burgers and a knowing smirk.
"We made grilled hamburgers while you both were gone doing God knows what." She says, handing me the dishes and then in my ears, she whispers, "Hopefully making up."
There's a hopeful look in her eyes when I smile. What do I do? It's not like I'm going to do a happy dance singing He's in love with me, y'all even though I want to. I take off the slice of bread covering the sandwich while Carter gestures for us to come over. Flynn bounds down the stairs and I hand one plate to him after Khalid and Amanda leave with bowls of popcorn to join the game in the living room.
"Thank you," he says, taking the plate from my hand and then kissing me right in front of everyone. He grabs my hand and pulls me away from the kitchen to join them in the living room.
When I look up, I see Khalid shielding Cass's eyes whispering something about PG-13 while Carter does the same to Ellie.
"Took you both long enough." Carter groans, taking his hand away from Ellie's eyes and gives her a high-five. Cass nudges Khalid away and Amanda moves over for us to sit.
I sink down on the soft layers of blanket and when Flynn takes a seat beside me, Amanda nudges me on my shoulder. "Seems like someone decided to let go."
I press my head against her shoulder, thinking back to the conversation we had when she and Cass were at my house and a hint of a smile graces my face. I grab a can of soda, enjoying the game and I laugh when Cass tosses some popcorn on my face because I got Ellie's imitation wrong. When Flynn gets up to join his sister at the front, I smile genuinely because God knows I've not felt this happy in such a long time.
"Yes. I think I did." And God, I'm glad I did.