Joel
"He fired me! The bastard actually fired me! For saving his ass! I can't believe I even did that? And for what? The arrogant, stuck up, son of a.."
"ME!" I shouted at Mark to stop his rant. "You did it for me, not Casper."
"Yeah, well I wish I hadn't," Mark grumbled.
Mark sat down on the edge of my bed and fiddled with my phone charger cable, a scowl still on his face.
He'd interrupted my nap, and I wasn't happy. I would have told him off about it if it wasn't for the fact I felt a little guilty. Ok, a lot guilty.
You see, this job actually meant a lot to Mark. His mum was quite ill. Something happened to her a while ago and since then she suffered from anxiety and depression. There were weeks when she didn't even leave the house.
His dad worked shifts as a nurse at the local hospital. He's quite senior in his role, and the pay wasn't too bad, but he often had to turn down shifts to look after his wife.
I knew that Mark was giving most of the money he earnt at the manor to his dad to help with the bills.
"I'm sorry," I muttered to Mark. "Do you want me to have a word with Casper, see if I can get you your job back?"
Mark laughed, but there was no humour in it.
"Really, go and talk to the guy who you're supposed to be avoiding? If you ask him for a favour he could ask for a favour back, and where might that lead? The least you can do is let me feel like I helped in some way by dropping those dishes. If you go putting yourself in harms way because of it, what would have been the point?"
Ok, Mark gave a good argument, but that still didn't make the guilt go away, and that was why two hours later I found myself standing outside Casper's room.
I took a few breaths to try to calm the slight tremor in my body, before knocking on his door.
He probably wasn't in his room.
That's probably not his footsteps I could hear coming to the door.
That's probably not him opening the..
"Cub?!" Casper looked nothing but shocked to see me stood outside his door.
I ignored this and stuck to my carefully worded script.
"Hi, have you got a minute, there's something I need to ask you?"
"Sure," he said, opening the door fully and stepping back to let me in.
I walked past him, keeping my expression blank and ignoring the slightly amused smirk on his face.
He closed the door and walked over to his couch, sitting down and patting the seat next to him.
I smiled at him nervously, then glanced around before grabbing a chair, and pulling it over towards him so I was sat in front of him, but a comfortable distance away.
His eyebrow twitched, but thankfully he didn't seem too offended by my blatant attempt to keep my distance.
He remained silent so I took this to mean he was waiting for me to start.
I cleared my throat quietly.
"Errm, well, you know yesterday, in the dining room, when that waiter dropped the dishes, and the wine spilt on Nathan?"
I don't know why I turned that into a question. Of course he remembered! Why was this so hard?
"Erm, yeah," Casper said mockingly, clearly agreeing with me that it was a stupid question.
I gave a small smile of embarrassment.
"Ok, well that waiter was actually my friend, Mark, and the thing is, you see, he really needed this job, because his mum isn't very well, and his dad, well he.."
"Hang on a second," Casper said interrupting my rambling. "Are you asking me to let him have his job back?"
"Basically.....yes." I said, shooting him a hopeful grin.
"Then I'm sorry, I can't do that," Casper said, in a rather matter-of-fact kind of way.
His reply took me a bit by surprise.
"Why not?" I asked, a little offended at being dismissed so quickly.
"Because he messed up. He broke about 10 items of crockery and glasses, and managed to spill it over the guests in the process. How could I not fire him?"
"Erm, by realising it was an accident, and maybe, you know, giving him the benefit of the doubt?" I said, in what in hindsight was probably a rather condescending tone.
Casper's eyebrows shot up, and I knew that I had overstepped the mark, but for some reason my sense of injustice didn't let me back down.
Casper stood up and started pacing up and down the floor in front of me.
"This manor has a reputation to maintain. Do you think this is achieved by constantly giving our staff the 'benefit of the doubt'? No, it's because we pride ourselves on having the best staff in the country, and the best staff in the country don't need giving the 'benefit of the doubt', because the best staff don't make mistakes in the first place. I can't give out second chances to everyone who makes a mistake."
I groaned and rolled my eyes. "I'm not talking about everyone, I'm just saying in this one instance maybe you can overlook..."
"Overlook it!" he interrupted once again. His pacing had increased in proportion to his anger. "He tipped wine all over a Beta for fuck's sake. And if we're going to get really picky, let's not forget that this is the same beta that you managed to headbutt that same evening! Did it ever occur to you that maybe I'd just already used up all my good will on you?"
"Seriously, that was not my fault!" I said, folding my arms across my chest and sulking like a child.
"No nothing ever is with you is it?" he said. He stopped pacing for a moment, then walked over to the door. "And next time you come here and tell me how to do my job, it'll be the last time you step foot in this manor, understood?!"
I could feel the heat radiating around my body as the anger took hold. As I stood up I clenched and unclenched my fists, resisting the urge to clock him one. Ok, that would probably lead to certain death, but it was nice to imagine it.
I marched towards him, fully intending on walking straight passed him and out of the door, but of course my mouth had other ideas.
"God, you're a prick sometimes," I began, "if you'd stopped to listen for a second instead of constantly interrupting me, you would have heard me say that, yes, this time it was my fault, and that I was sorry, but Mark did what he did to help me out. And yes, it turned into a bit of a disaster, and yes, poor little Nathan got a bit of wine on his shirt, but do you know what? Mark did what he did because he was being a good friend to me, and I came here to just try to return that favour, but I guess that probably means nothing to you does it. I'm not even sure you know what it's like to have a friend."
The moment that last sentence came out of my mouth, I wanted to suck it back in. I visibly saw him wince at my words. It wasn't anger I saw flash across his face. It was hurt.
I quickly lowered my gaze to the floor.
"Oh, shit, I shouldn't have said that! I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Any of it! I was just mad, and rambling, and if you want to punch me then go ahead and do it. I wouldn't blame you. NO! Actually, don't punch me, no, kick me, that would be better. Look, you've got your big boots on, give me a good swift kick in the shins. I deserve it, I'm so sorry...."
I heard a quiet chuckle, and I finally raised my eyes to take in the sight of ..... Casper smiling at me?
I looked at him questioningly?
"My god, you're just so annoyingly adorable at times, that I don't know whether to slap you or hug you?"
"I thought we'd agreed on a kick," I said nervously, trying not to imagine what it would be like to receive a hug from Casper.
He shook his head at me, then said, "And anyway, what do you mean it was your fault? You were nowhere near him when he dropped the plates so how could it have been your fault?"
I cringed at the question. "Is that really important? All you have to know is that it was my fault. So you can fire me instead right?"
Casper frowned. "So you want me to fire you?"
"Well, no, not really, but it still isn't fair that Mark got fired over something that wasn't his fault. Maybe you could give me some other sort of punishment....."
I was planning to carry on with that sentence, but as soon as I heard how it sounded, my body decided to put all its efforts into making my face turn a horrible shade of red instead.
Casper laughed. "As much as I would like to give you 'some other sort of punishment' I still don't understand how this is your fault."
"It just is," I said miserably, willing the blood to leave my face.
Casper sighed. "I tell you what. If you can make me understand how this is your fault, then I will consider giving your friend his job back. How does that sound?"
I blinked at him a few times before going back to sit down on the chair. I needed to come up with something and fast. What excuse could I possibly give for Mark dropping all those dishes?
"Well.....err....you see..."
"No, don't believe you," Casper said while sitting back down on the sofa.
I gave him a quick scowl before taking another breath. "You see, Mark thought that Nathan was going to hurt me, so he created a distraction so I could get away."
Casper looked thoughtful for a moment, "No, that can't be the case. It was me walking over to you, not Nathan."
"Ok then, he thought you were going to hurt me. I was just trying to spare your feelings by saying it was Nathan."
"Really?!" he said. "There is no way I was going to hurt you. And if he was stupid enough to believe that, then it was his own fault, and he deserves to be fired."
"Ok, no that's not it either." I paused trying to come up with something more believable.
"Right, let me stop you there," he said. "Either you are making all of this up, and it was your friend's fault, or for some reason you don't want to tell me the truth. But let me warn you to think very carefully over what you say next, because this is your last chance to save your friend's job. If I don't believe you, or the reason is not good enough, then he goes. So you better decide which is more important, your friend, or this secret you seem to have going on between the two of you."
It just popped into my head as he said those last words.
"Ok, you're right, I suppose I can tell you. You see the thing is, I have a sort of crush on Mark, and earlier that evening, I'd kind of told him, and I think it messed with his head.."
"STOP!" Casper said, holding his hand up, "I've heard enough, you can go now."
"But I haven't.."
"I'm not interested," he said, looking rather annoyed once more. "You should keep your private lives private, and the moment they interfere with your work, then you deserve to be sacked. So let's take this as a warning to you too..."
"WAIT!" I said in a panic, "that wasn't true, let me try again?"
Casper looked exasperated.
"What try another lie to see if I believe it. Just get out Joel," he said, getting back up and walking over to the door.
Usually the sound of him saying my name would have me jumping in joy, but now it sounded hollow and empty. I wanted him to call me Cub, not Joel. I was his cub. I was...
"....Please Casper, let me explain. It's not easy..."
"To tell the truth?" he interrupted, "Is that what you're saying?" He shook his head, "Just go."
"But please?" I begged, "I'll tell you, you see Mark was trying to protect me because..."
"I'm not listening. Get out!"
"Because I think that I might be.."
"For the love of everything Joel, please just.."
"I think I might be y..."
"GET OUT. GET OUT. GET OUT."
"I THINK I MIGHT BE YOUR MATE!"
Casper froze, in what I could only describe as pure horror.
"You what?" he managed to croak out.
I fidgeted, shuffling my feet, and wringing my hands nervously.
"I think I might be your mate," I said, a lot quieter this time.