Chapter 32: Chapter 32

MELODY

~Is there a hole I can crawl into?~ Complete and utter embarrassment filled me. I glared at Jenny. She was trying not to laugh.

I slowly turned to find Carter standing with a huge grin on his face. “I… We… I…” I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.

Words had failed me, and he was still smiling at me. “So, would you like to see my ten-inch cock?” he asked. I looked into his face and saw a very arrogant smile with his dimples showing.

Jenny giggled beside me, and I tried to think of a witty response to cover the fact that I was blushing, but I came up short.

He watched me in amusement, probably taking pity on me for being so nervous.

He let out a laugh, which made others look in our direction with surprise because Mr. CEO never laughed. “It’s okay. I just came to say congrats to you personally.”

“Congrats?” Jenny asked.

He grinned. “Your first book, ~The Stranger~, is a best seller of the year.”

“OMG!!” Jenny gasped and pulled me into a tight hug.

I stood there motionless, and she pulled back and frowned. “You’re not happy?”

I shrugged. It hadn’t been my choice to publish the book I’d worked on during college. I’d been dreaming of this day all my life, but I didn’t know what I was feeling right now.

I wanted to be happy, and I was, but I missed my family and friends. I’d always wanted to celebrate this day with everyone and see the pride in the eyes of Mom and Dad.

One day, I’d forgotten my manuscript on Carter’s desk, and he’d read it and wanted to publish it. I hadn’t been ready. After a lot of argument, I gave up on one condition, that he’d keep me anonymous.

After that, I’d published many standalone novels, but this was the best I had written until now.

Besides Carter, Jenny was the second person who knew about my being an anonymous writer.

She was the one who promoted my novels. She’d asked the beta readers and bloggers to advertise the novel on their websites.

“Thank you,” I whispered, swallowing the dry lump that had lodged itself in my throat.

“Congratulations again,” Carter said, looking at me with a frown, and his eyes were full of disappointment.

I smiled gently, and he looked at me again for a long second and left, shaking his head.

For the rest of the day, I was deep in thought. How would I have celebrated if I had been with Mom, Dad, Jake, Nick, and Lisa?

Lisa…

I looked at the picture on my desk, our family picture.

A silent tear rolled down my cheek, and before I knew it, I was sobbing violently.

“Mel?” Jenny called. She stepped forward and placed a hand on my shoulder. Standing, I threw myself in her arms and cried. She held tightly without saying or asking anything, which I was grateful for.

***

“What will it be, ladies?” the bartender asked with a wink. He eyed Jenny’s rock before moving his eyes to me.

“Not interested, buddy,” I said before he made a move on me.

After work, we’d ended up grabbing a quick dinner before heading off to the club.

And after getting drunk, we’d call a cab and crash at my place.

Jenny leaned over the bar. “Surprise us,” she said.

His eyes zoomed in on Jenny’s cleavage, and he licked his lips. Typical man.

I shook my head. She had always been flirtatious. I glared at her. “What? I’m just having some fun.” She shrugged.

I laughed and looked at the dance floor. All the bodies were rubbing each other, hips to hips, sweating, kissing each other.

I tried my hardest to block out the tugs of arousal that pulled at my skin.

Damn, I needed to get laid. Maybe it was the right time to call him and ask if he was free this week.

After four drinks, Jenny leaned forward. “Holy shit! He is fucking hot, and he is staring at you!” she whispered, looking past me.

“Jenny.” I glared at her, continuing to sip my drink.

“I know you have a boyfriend, but looking at someone is not cheating.” She gave me a cheeky grin.

I cringed inwardly. “I have a confession,” I whispered.

She looked at me. “Daniel is not my boyfriend. We’re best friends, nothing else.”

Her eyes were wide as saucers, and before she could say anything, I told her everything except that he was gay.

“I knew it; you were lying!” she accused. “So, you’re not dating anyone?”

I shook my head.

“When was the last time you went on a date?”

“I don’t remember. Maybe three years ago,” I replied. I could actually feel the sadness in my own words, because it wasn’t like me. I used to enjoy my life to the fullest.

She reached over and squeezed my knee.

Suddenly, Jenny grinned widely. I knew whatever she was thinking was not good. She looked past me and winked. “He’s still staring at you. One night isn’t going to hurt.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

I shook my head. Many things had changed in the past six years. As much as I craved physical touches, I was also smart enough to learn from the past.

I didn’t do hook-ups or one-night stands.

“Not interested, Jenny. Maybe we should call it a night. We’ve had more than five drinks.”

“At least take a look. He hasn’t taken his eyes off you since we arrived,” she said breathlessly.

“Jenny!” I glared at her.

“Please!”

I sighed and downed the drink at once, placing the glass on the counter.

“Only for you, but I’m not interested,” I said before turning. My eyes met the familiar pair of green eyes. I could feel all the color drain out of my face, and my stomach dropped to my toes.

~Xavier.~

~

His eyes met mine briefly before taking a slow ride down my body.

My heartbeat ran a marathon. I couldn’t believe my eyes, who I was seeing.

How many drinks had I had? Five or six?

He couldn’t have been here.

He was in New York with his family. He wasn’t here. It was only my imagination or the result of too many drinks.

But it was twice this week that I’d seen him. No, it was my imagination, I reassured myself again.

I closed my eyes and opened them again. He was gone again, just like a few days ago. I had been having trouble sleeping since then.

“Oh, honey, are you okay?” she asked, sensing my reaction.

“I’m fine.” I tried to smile. “I’m calling a cab, do—”

“No, Bob is coming to pick me up,” Jenny said.

“Do you want me to wait?”

“No, he’ll be here any time.” I didn’t have it in me to argue with her, so I just let it go and smiled.

“Tell Bob I said hi.” I kissed her cheek before walking out into the warm summer air. That was when I felt someone watching me. I looked around but didn’t see anyone.

I shook my head. I was being paranoid. I made quick work of catching a cab.

After my shower and nightly routine, I lay in my bed. For a few minutes, I allowed myself to be weak, and the tears started to slip from my eyes.

I cried as I remembered his arms around me, the sound of his laughter, and the brightness of his eyes when he looked at me.

***

~I woke up wrapped around Xavier. My thigh was over his, my arm was across his waist, and his arm was holding me close.~

~

~It was still early morning. I had to leave before someone saw me leaving his room, especially Lisa.~

~

~I’d ignored him all day, after what had happened when we’d arrived. He hadn’t stopped there; he’d practically kidnapped me and had explained everything.~

~

~I had been pissed about his not having told me before, but how could I stay pissed for long when he kissed me into oblivion?~

~

~“Morning.” His voice was scratchy and rough. His eyes were warm as he leaned down and kissed me softly.~

~

~“Morning,” I breathed deeply, and he held me tighter. “Stay,” he whispered.~

~

~I shook my head. “I can’t, baby. You know that I don’t want them to find out about us like this.”~

~

~“Sara,” he groaned as if he was in pain. “I’m tired of playing this hide-and-seek. I can’t touch you, can’t kiss you in front of anyone. It fucking hurts.~

~

~“I want you all to myself, every day, every fucking minute, every motherfucking second I want to hold you in my arms.”~

~

~“Why do you insist on calling me Sara when you know my name?” I asked, changing the topic. He had been trying to get me set on telling everyone about us, and I had been stalling every time I could.~

~

~His jaw clenched. He knew once again I was avoiding the subject. I knew he was hurting, but I was aching too, not just for Xavier, but also for my family.~

~

~Deep down, I was afraid I would lose them all in the process of trying to protect everyone’s feelings.~

~

~He sighed, pulling me closer, nestling his head on my neck. “I dated a girl named Melody in high school. She was my best friend’s sister.” He looked up and met my eyes.~

~

~I saw sadness and pain that shook me to the core. Had he loved her before meeting me, or did he still love her?~

~

~“Melody and I practically grew up together. Our parents were friends and neighbors, and we went to the same school.~

~

~On my sixteenth birthday, I asked her out. We dated for a month, and we had sex a few times. The next month, she told me she was pregnant.” I sucked in a harsh breath.~

~

~He kissed my forehead, and he held me tightly, afraid I might flee. “I didn’t love her, but I cared for her, so we told our parents, and I promised to marry her once we were eighteen.~

~

~“But at the time of delivery, she didn’t make it, and neither did my daughter.” His voice was filled with grief and pain.~

~

~“I’m sorry,” I whispered, kissing his neck. I could feel my own tears running down my cheeks.~

~

~“It was all because of my negligence. If I’d been careful and hadn’t knocked her up, she would have been alive. She died because I was careless. I fucked her and got her pregnant.”~

~

~“You were young, Xavier,” I said softly.~

~

~He looked into my eyes, and I felt his whole body relax. His thumb traveled over my bottom lip.~

~

~“I love you, Melody,” he whispered, but the pain was still there, and I didn’t want to see pain in his eyes, ever.~

~

~“Sara. Call me Sara. I like that.” I kissed his cheek. “And now that you know my real name, it will be easier to find me if I leave again,” I joked. “And—”~

~

~The words weren’t even out of my mouth before he cut me off. “Don’t even fucking think about leaving me again.” His arms went tightly around me, like he was expecting me to vanish into thin air.~

~

~“I will track your ass down and drag you back here.” His hands held my face, and his lips came closer to mine.~

~

~“Don’t fucking leave me again, baby. I don’t believe I’m saying this, but I will go crazy without you if you leave me again.~

~

“Promise me, if something happens or if you ever doubt me, you will come to me. We will talk and sort out everything. Together.”

He stared at me with hopeful eyes, and my heart started beating double time.

~“I promise I won’t leave you again until I get a reason to leave you. I promise I won’t ever leave you if there is a way we can sort out whatever shit is going on.~

~

“If we can’t, I will leave,” I promised him.

“I won’t give you any reason to leave me, ever.” He kissed me until we were both breathless.