Chapter 35: Chapter 35

^SIX YEARS EARLIER^

MELODY

“And I love you,” I whispered. We shared a long, passionate kiss.

After a few minutes, his breathing grew even, and I knew he’d fallen back to sleep.

I lay there in the dark for a long time, thinking about how to talk with Lisa and explain the situation without hurting her.

I didn’t sleep all night as I watched him rest until the sun came up. There was a strange pit in my stomach. Something was going to happen, something bad; I just knew it.

I untangled myself from his arm around me. “I love you,” I whispered, kissing his forehead and his lips. Silently, I slid out of bed and wrapped a robe around my body.

I left him after one last look, and a thought entered my mind.

~Starting today, everything is going to change.~

~

Today was the third day. Today, I had to choose either my family or Xavier. But I wasn’t ready to leave Xavier and never would be.

I could only try to talk to Lisa and make her understand Xavier didn’t love her. He wouldn’t accept her in his life, with me or without me. She would never be happy with him.

I sighed and opened the door to walk back to my room before anyone woke up. I stopped and so did my heart when I saw Lisa sitting on the floor in front of the door.

~How long has she been sitting here?~

~

Why sit here? She could have knocked on the door if she’d wanted.

She looked up, and her eyes met mine. Her eyes were swollen and red. She looked up at me and then past me to Xavier sleeping in the bed.

“Lisa…” I opened my mouth to force out anything, something to tell her, but all the words were stuck in the back of my throat, making the lump grow bigger.

A lump that was becoming impossible to swallow down each time she looked at me with those sad eyes.

She stood slowly, and I looked down, feeling guilty. This wasn’t how I’d wanted Lisa to find out. I’d wanted to tell her myself everything without hiding anything.

I didn’t know how to look in her eyes now.

“You slept with my boyfriend again,” she whimpered. Her sadness choked her voice.

I didn’t look up. My head was down with shame. I stepped out, closing the door behind me. I didn’t want Xavier to be involved in any of this.

“First Duncan, and now Xavier,” she hissed through clenched teeth. I shook my head without looking up. I wanted to tell her I hadn’t slept with Duncan.

“Have I done something to hurt you?” she asked. Her teary eyes fixed on my face.

I shook my head.

“Then tell me why you hurt me when I think I can be happy for once,” she snapped. She grabbed both shoulders and shook me. “Tell me why. Why do you always have to sleep with my boyfriends?”

Finally, I gathered the courage to look up, to tell her, “I didn’t sleep with Duncan, and can we talk somewhere else?” I pleaded.

“But you slept with Xavier, and don’t you dare lie, because I heard your every moan, every whimper for the whole night.” She sobbed with her hands on her face.

I stood there helpless, seeing her crying over my betrayal.

“Lisa! What the fuck? Why are you crying?” Nick came and wrapped his arm around her.

He glared at me. “What have you done this time?” he growled, making me flinch.

I stepped back. “I’m sorry,” I whimpered.

“Tell me what happened,” Nick said to Lisa. She met my eyes, and they showed only hatred for me.

She told Nick what had happened, how she hadn’t been able to sleep last night and wanted to talk to Xavier badly, but she’d stopped when she’d heard our voices and had stood there all night, hearing our moans and grunts.

“How could you?” he hissed, looking furious.

“Nick, stop,” Jake’s voice boomed from behind. He was in his running gear. He came forward and looked between us, assessing the situation.

“No, I will not stop today,” he bellowed angrily. “She has no right to hurt my sister again.” I looked at him and replayed his words in my mind, ~his sister~.

“She’s my sister, too, Nick,” I whispered. “I’m your sister too,” I said. “Maybe not by blood,” I muttered.

“Let’s talk somewhere else.” Jake said and led us to the backyard.

My heart pounded faster. I was afraid of who I was going to lose today, and I wasn’t ready to lose anyone. Call me selfish, but I wanted them all.

We stopped on the back lawn. A knot of worry tightened in me. Jake turned to Lisa.

After Lisa stopped, Jake asked me, “Is she telling the truth?”

I willed my eyes open, using all my strength to hold back the tears stinging the back of my throat.

I nodded, giving him an answer.

“Were you with Xavier last night in his room?” Jake looked calm, but he was anything but calm at this moment.

I stupidly nodded again.

“Fuck!” Jake roared, threading his fingers in his hair. He met my eyes, then quickly looked away, like he couldn’t look at me.

“Lisa…” I took a step forward. “Let me explain everything, please…,” I whispered.

“What is there to explain, huh? I heard you, Mel. I stood there, hearing you fucking my boyfriend, moaning for him,” she hissed.

Jake took a few steps toward me. Hurt, anger, and desperation clung to his features. “Leave, Mel. Leave before I do something. Just leave.” I could hear the warning in his voice.

I shook my head. “I can’t until Lisa knows the whole truth.” I looked past Jake to Lisa, who was still crying on Nick’s shoulder.

“You fucked her boyfriends, Mel, not once but twice!” Jake growled.

I couldn’t breathe. My chest felt so tight that all the words I wanted to yell were caught inside me.

“I didn’t fuck Duncan. I never did. He was like a brother to me. I told Lisa everything that happened that night.” I looked up and saw confusion behind Jake’s eyes.

“If it wasn’t for Duncan, I would have been raped that night, Jake! He saved me that night and took me home. He—”

“Rape?” Jake whispered, horrified.

“Yes, Jake, rape. He took me home and held me like you would have held me when I broke down,” I yelled, tears forming in my eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell me? You could have told any of us,” Jake growled.

Hot tears rolled down my cheeks, and rage boiled in the pit of my stomach.

“I was sixteen, Jake! I was scared, but I did tell Lisa. She never believed me,” I snapped.

Jake turned and glared at Lisa, and she hid her face in Nick’s chest.

Jake turned back to face me. “And what’s your excuse for Xavier?” he spit, looking revolted.

My chest tightened, and my stomach hardened. I swallowed. “I didn’t know he was Lisa’s boyfriend when I first slept with him.”

“Fucking liar you are, Mel. I introduced him as my boyfriend to you!” she snapped, still in Nick’s arms.

~Stop calling him your boyfriend! He’s not your boyfriend!!~

~

I ground my teeth. “I’m not talking about graduation day, Lisa. I met Xavier a year ago in New York. We hooked up, and we talked about what we felt for each other.

“Even after a year, I was still trying to get him out of my head, and that wasn’t enough. You brought him to my graduation, and boom!” I paused to look at their shocked faces. Lisa was pale.

“He was standing in front of me,” I confessed.

“Sara?” Lisa whispered.

“Yes, Lisa, I’m Sara, who he was looking for, for a year. I gave him a fake name because I wasn’t planning to see him again, but it was fate, destiny that we’d meet again after a year,” I let out.

“The stranger from New York?” Jake implored.

My chest felt tight; it was getting harder to breathe by the second. I nodded.

“That doesn’t mean you can sleep with my boyfriend again! You have your boyfriend for that!” she screamed.

I took in a deep breath and willed myself to relax. We were circling again and again on the same topic.

“First, Dan is not my boyfriend; and second, neither is Xavier yours,” I said calmly.

“What the fuck does that mean?” Nick growled.

I crossed my arms. I wasn’t going to give up this time.

If I had to fight for Xavier, I would fight, even with Lisa, because I loved him, and I wouldn’t give up without a fight.

“Are you going to tell them, or should I?” I asked.

When Lisa didn’t speak for a long time, I told them everything about their arrangement. Jake was furious and yelled at Lisa, and Nick, as usual, took Lisa’s side.

Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward. “Lisa, I’m sorry. I’ll never hurt you, at least never intentionally. I tried to fight what I feel for him, but nothing helped me.

“Before I knew he was your boyfriend, I was planning to go to New York just to see him, but you showed up with him.” I took a deep breath.

“I love him, Lisa. I’m in love with Xavier.”

She gasped, and her eyes shone with hurt and betrayal.

“Un-fucking-believable,” Nick growled, glaring at me.

Jake stood motionless, reading me with his too perceptive eyes. “I love him,” I whispered again, tears falling freely now.

Jake’s eyes widened. He knew how serious I was. For the first time in my life, I didn’t want to think about the consequences, because life was unpredictable. You couldn’t see the future.

If you wanted something, you had to take a chance without thinking about the outcome.

And I was ready for anything if it meant I could have Xavier in my life.

I faced Lisa again. “I love Xavier, Lisa.”

“So do I,” Lisa screamed.

“Xavier doesn’t feel the same for you, Lisa. He loves me the way I love him.”

She laughed unexpectedly. “Is that what he told you? You don’t know him, Mel. Don’t be naive. I’ve known Xavier for three years.”

Doubts started to settle in my chest, making it difficult to swallow.

“Maybe you’ve known him for three years, but I know he loves me, and I love—”

“I’m pregnant,” she blurted out.

The world around me stopped with those words. Pain stabbed my chest, a twisting knife to my heart. I could hear the curses coming from two different sides.

~This can’t be real. No way! No. Fucking. Way.~

~

I pressed my fingers into my ears. I’d heard it; I knew what I’d heard. Couldn’t fucking believe it.

“No… You are lying,” I whispered.

“I’m not lying. Xavier hasn’t fucked anyone in the last year except me. Yes, he may not be my boyfriend, but he is the father of my baby.” She looked down and rubbed her stomach affectionately.

Bile rose in my throat, and I clasped a hand to my mouth. I felt like I could throw up, and my lip trembled.

“I’m pregnant,” she said again.

“What?!” Dad’s voice boomed. My head jerked to the left, and I saw Mom and Dad standing on the porch.

Lisa paled and then started crying. Mom was in front of her in a second.

Without wasting any time, Lisa told them her version of the story. I’d fucked Duncan and Xavier because I was jealous of her. I wanted to hurt her.

I wanted to tell them she was lying, but nothing came out. I couldn’t open my mouth. I could only stare at her hand rubbing her stomach.

Even if I wanted to speak, it was no use because she was pregnant with Xavier’s baby.

My heart was free-falling into my gut.

I was still dazed, and I didn’t see Mom was standing in front of me.

Before I could say anything, her palm connected with my cheek, not once, not twice. She kept striking me, and I stood motionless because I couldn’t feel anything but agonizing pain in my heart.

“That’s enough, Mom,” Jake growled, grabbing her wrist before she could hit me again.

“Don’t. Not this time, Jake. We didn’t raise her to whore around. We loved you all equally. How could she do this to her sister?” She hit, again and again. I didn’t feel anything.

I was feeling numb. Cold.

I couldn’t hear what they were saying. My mind wandered back to when Xavier had gotten all tensed up, hearing about pregnancy shit.

Did he know Lisa was pregnant?

“Does he know about the…baby…?” I asked.

The tension was so thick it could suffocate anyone within breathing distance. I waited and waited for her reply.

Every second felt like an eternity, but when she replied, my heart lurched into my throat.

“He knows I’ve missed my periods.”

I felt the burn at the back of my throat, the stinging behind my eyes, but I took a deep, shuddering breath, willing myself not to do this…not to fall apart.

I couldn’t fall apart, not in front of everyone. I needed to get my head straight, keep all emotions out, and stay in control.

I nodded. I turned my back to walk inside. Dad’s voice made me halt.

I spun and came face to face with Dad. His eyes were stormy, filled with betrayal. “Leave and never come back. You are dead to us,” he declared openly and left.

“You have done enough,” Mom said, coming forward. “If you can’t keep your pants on, then there is no place for you in our home, because Xavier and Lisa are getting married.”

“I will never come between them,” I promised, and turning my back to them, I clasped my hand over my mouth to stop the agonizing cry that was threatening to escape any second.

Jake wrapped his arm around me from behind. “Shh… I’ll talk to them, Mel. I’ll tell them the truth. Just give me a little time, please,” he whispered.

I cried harder, unable to control it anymore. “You were right, Jake. Love only hurts, only gives pain and leaves you heartbroken,” I sobbed.

“Everything will be all right. They’re all mad at the moment.”

“Nothing will be all right.” I wiped my eyes and turned to face Jake. “Take care. I’ll miss you.” I kissed his cheek and left, never turning back.