Chapter 41: Chapter 41

XAVIER

I knocked on the door, tapping my foot impatiently. Mia answered the door. She looked surprised, then her face turned stormy, and she twisted her lips angrily at me.

“What are you doing here?” Her eyes were red and puffy from crying.

Ignoring her, I walked past her. Dan and Matt were arguing. “You were the one who begged her to come,” Matt growled.

“I’m sorry. I never thought something like this would happen,” Dan sighed.

Matt whirled and saw me standing there. “What the fuck do you want now?”

Sandy stood, crossing her arms. “You bastard. You have the nerve to come here after everything.”

“You fucking asshole. You made her life a living hell. You took everything from her. Now what else do you want?” Jacob growled.

My hands tightened into fists until my knuckles hurt. I gritted my teeth. “Do you know what it’s like to live in hell? I have been living in hell for seven years, only for Melody,” I growled.

They looked surprised, and I saw confusion in their faces.

Shit. I hadn’t come here for this. I closed my eyes in frustration and pinched the bridge of my nose. Taking a few deep breaths, I opened my eyes and saw them looking at me.

Ignoring their questioning looks, I asked, “Any idea where she could be now? So we can go. Her last location was at the airport.”

“Airport! Oh my God!” Mia whimpered, draping her hand over her mouth. Everyone’s faces went pale. They looked at each other like they were sharing the same secret.

“California. She’s in California,” Dan muttered, looking lost and pained. He closed his eyes and shook his head.

“Fuck! I should have known,” Matt growled. “I told her we would go together.” He started pacing in the room.

I stood there, dumbfounded. I didn’t know what was going on, but it looked like they had forgotten I was still in the room.

“What is in California?” I inquired.

Dan’s nostrils flared. “Son of a bitch! Don’t pretend like you don’t know,” he growled.

Mia was crying in the corner, and Jacob wrapped his arms around her, trying to calm her.

“Damn it, there isn’t another flight for two hours.” Matt threw his phone with inhuman strength against the wall, smashing it to pieces. I knew he was as worried as I was for Melody.

“You seriously don’t know what tomorrow is?” Dan stood in front of me.

“I wouldn’t ask if I knew,” I snapped.

“So Lisa didn’t tell you when Mel called?” Dan asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Melody called me?”

He nodded, looking at me intently. I looked around. Mia and Jacob were looking at me with pity. Sandy and her husband were glaring at me, and Matt looked nervous, like his life depended on my answer.

“Will someone tell me what’s going on? This is not a time to play twenty questions,” I hissed, losing my temper.

“So you don’t know anything?” Jacob asked me again.

My lip curled in anger at all their secrets and the fucking questions. “I would know if you would just fucking spit it out,” I hissed.

Dan swore under his breath and said, “You might need to sit down first.”

I shook my head. “Just tell me.”

“Mel—” Dan started to say, but Mia interrupted him.

“I think Mel should—”

“Do you think Mel will be in any condition to tell him after tomorrow? Do you think she will ever be able to tell him what happened seven years ago without breaking down?” Dan growled at Mia.

If I had thought that Dan had looked furious before, now he looked positively livid—his anger was something cold and dark.

I knew he cared about Melody, fiercely. But the look on his face gave me chills. My heart dropped at his words. What had happened seven years ago?

“What happened?” I begged.

Dan closed his eyes tightly, like he was in pain at the mention of what had happened with her. When he opened his eyes, I saw the tears forming.

“Seven years ago, she gave birth to a baby boy,” Dan said.

My eyes widened, and it felt like my heart would burst at any moment. ~I have a son.~ My legs wobbled, and I gripped the edge of the couch. “I have a son?” I whispered, swallowing the lump of emotion.

I could feel my eyes filling with tears of joy. I wanted to make her my wife, mother to my children, but what had happened with Carter’s sister, Melody, had scared the hell out of me.

Dan shook his head. “No, you had a son.”

My blood ran cold at his words, and my pulse was pounding so loudly I could hardly hear anything but the erratic thumping.

I choked, not believing what I was hearing.

“What the fuck does that mean?” I lashed out at Dan. My stomach twisted so painfully that I thought I would puke.

“When Mel gave birth, he was weak and anemic. He needed his father, or sperm donor, because he needed blood, AB negative.”

I sucked in a breath. I felt as if I were being stuffed into a small box. Numbness swam through me.

“Why didn’t she call me?” My voice was almost a whisper.

“She called you the first time to tell you she was pregnant, but then you had already blocked her. And the second time she called, she was still blocked.

“Then she called you from a different number, and guess who picked up?

My eyes widened. “Lisa.”

“Bingo! Dan cried. “She begged her, but you were too busy playing father to your daughter! You let your son die.

“He died the same day he came into the world. Only because of you,” he hissed in my face and walked away, having dropped a nuclear bomb on me.

The earth crumbled beneath me. My body was shaking, and I was struggling to breathe. Dan’s every word had me paralyzed.

Everything muted around me, and the only words that kept ringing through my ears were, ~My son died because I wasn’t there to save him. I killed my son.~

Mia cried again, making my heart stutter, then she opened her mouth to speak.

“That isn’t all. We almost lost Mel too. She died. Literally. Twice. Her heart gave up as soon as she saw Owen died.

“When the doctor revived her, she went into a coma. She was in a coma for one month and ten days,” Mia said, sniffing.

I stumbled backward. Her words were like a slap in the face. My hand flew to my chest, and I massaged my sternum with the heel of my hand, trying to suppress the shooting pain.

Her words started to sink in, and my body started to shake.

~She died. She almost died.~

Jacob wrapped his arm around her and looked into my eyes.

“Her parents never called her to find out if she was alive or not. Neither did her brothers.

“So yeah, you were living in hell, and she was enjoying her life after losing the man she loved and seeing her son die in front of her eyes,” he growled.

My eyes welled up with more tears when I thought of what she’d gone through and how broken she was from the inside.

My knees weakened, and I sank inelegantly to the floor, tears falling freely from my eyes.

~What have I done?~

One wrong decision and lifelong pain. I had regretted my decision ever since, but I’d thought I had been doing the right thing for Mel, for Mila.

~Clearly, I was wrong.~

Clenching my eyes shut, I ignored the crushing pain in my chest. A hot tear glided down my cheek as I recalled the way she’d looked at me when Mila stood in front of me and I’d picked her in my arms.

The pain in her eyes had been so raw, it had sliced my heart.

Mia sobbed into her hands, unable to control her despair. Another sob rippled from Sandy, and Matt shut his eyes tightly, and his hands curled into fists.

My phone vibrated in my pocket. I took it out and swiped to answer without looking at the caller ID.

“Hello,” I said hoarsely, a hot tear sliding down my face.

“You okay?” Gunner asked.

I stood, and without a word, I walked out of the room.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and tried to speak through the tightness blocking my airway.

“Get the custody papers ready. I want sole custody, and I want that bitch out of my life,” I growled and headed toward the parking lot.

“What happened?”

I told him. He, too, was speechless after I was finished. My harsh words and accusations had come back to haunt me. I’d humiliated her in front of everyone.

I’d been blinded by my own jealousy. I hadn’t been able to see the pain in her eyes.

“I don’t deserve her,” I whispered.

“Damn right you don’t,” Gunner growled.

There was only one thing on my mind right now, and that was that Lisa was going to pay for it all at once.

Damn the consequences.

Damn it all.

“Now what are you going to do?”

“I will make everything right.”

“How?”

“I don’t know that, but I will make sure Melody never gets hurt again, especially because of me.”

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“Just trust me, okay? I won’t do anything to hurt her again.”

All those years, I’d stayed silent because I’d never wanted Mila to grow up without her mother. I’d wanted to give Mila a complete family.

~This stops now.~

My hands shook violently with a rage I’d never felt before. It was all-consuming. I couldn’t breathe or see straight. I hung up and called Stefan.

After getting Mia’s exact location, I called a friend of mine. I needed a private plane. I knew he would never deny me.

I headed directly to the airfield, and the plane was waiting for me. After five agonizing hours, I landed in California and headed toward the location Stefan had texted me an hour ago.

The cab stopped at the cemetery, and I stepped out. I felt my face pale. All the blood drained from my body, causing shivers to course through me. I shuddered, suddenly cold.

My heart pounded so violently I found it fucking hard to breathe.

As I moved closer to the entrance, my mind raced and my chest heaved with each passing moment, escalating with every step bringing me closer.

It was almost midnight. I opened the flashlight of my phone to see clearly, and I walked deeper into the cemetery, looking for any sign of Melody.

I stopped in my tracks when I saw a figure, sitting with her knees close to her chest and her head down. I shakily took a deep breath, knowing what I was about to see.

I took two more steps, and my heart squeezed painfully when I saw the cake and a flower placed near the grave.

I was trying damn hard to stay strong, but I lost the battle against my emotions, and the tears streamed down my face as soon as I saw the name written on the stone.

~OWEN MELODY ADAM~

~Born and Passed on March 15, 2014~

~May you always have an angel by your side.~

Melody looked up. I sucked in a breath when I saw the same pain I’d felt when I’d lost my daughter.

The pain in her eyes nearly killed me. I was the reason she was in pain. I would remember her face for the rest of my life.

There was no going back. It was now a part of me, burned into my senses, whether I wanted it to be or not.

I met her gaze for a few seconds before deciding to look out in front of me, avoiding the pain in her eyes.

I sat beside her. We didn’t talk for a long time. “I didn’t know about Owen,” I whispered. “If I knew, believe me, I would have done anything to save our son.”

Tears leaked out of the corners of my eyes, and my chest heaved, trying to accommodate my breaths.

Her cries racked her small body, and I had to look away from her breakdown. Seeing her in so much pain was too much for me to handle.

I wrapped my arms around her, and she cried with her face on my chest for hours. At some point, she fell asleep in my arms.

Instinctively, my arms tightened around her waist, pulling her closer. I needed her as close as she could be. I placed a kiss on her forehead when a whimper escaped past her lips.

Her eyebrows furrowed like she was in pain, the pain I caused her. I caressed it out with my lips.

I looked ahead at the grave of our son. It still felt like I was dreaming. She had been pregnant with my baby.

How had she looked while she was carrying my baby inside her? How had she felt when our son kicked her for the first time? What had she craved?

I shook my head and looked at the grave, trying to picture my son. I didn’t even know what he’d looked like.

“Happy birthday, son. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me. I’ll never forgive myself,” I whispered.

I placed another kiss on Melody’s forehead. She burrowed deeper into my embrace and let out a sleepy sigh. My eyes started drooping, and sleep was beginning to claim me.

I woke as I felt someone tapping on my shoulder. I blinked a few times to remember why I was here. Matt was standing over us, glaring at me. Melody was still sleeping in my arms.

“How did you get here before us?” Matt whispered.

I shrugged.

Matt squatted down. Placing one hand under her knees and the other on her waist, he scooped her up. “She’s mine,” he growled.

My jaw clenched, but I stayed silent and nodded. I stood and stumbled. My legs had gone numb from staying in the same position for too long.

“We’re taking her to the room we reserved in the nearest hotel,” Dan said, giving me the name and room number of the hotel.

“We need to talk,” Dan said and followed Matt, who was heading out, carrying Melody in his arms.

Half an hour later, I was again standing outside their suite, knocking. Jacob opened the door and gave me a nod to come inside.

I stepped inside. Dan and the others were sitting in the living room, sipping coffee.

I sat alone on a couch. “How is she?”

“Sleeping,” Matt replied.

“Coffee?” Mia asked.

I shook my head. “Thank you.”

“How did you get here before us?” Matt asked again. I could hear the accusation in his voice.

“I borrowed a plane from my friend.” I shrugged.

“You said something about you are living in hell for Mel. What does that mean?” Dan asked.

I sighed and rubbed my temple. I’d already had two cups of coffee before coming here, but it looked like I’d need another one. I looked up at Mia. “Can I get coffee first, please?”

She nodded and immediately handed me a cup of coffee. “Where do you want me to start from?” I asked.

Dan leaned forward, his elbow on his knees. “Start with telling us if you really loved her or used her to get in her pants.”

I growled in reply, “I loved her. I still do.”

Dan snorted. “Yeah, that’s why you married her sister just three months after she left.”

My body froze.

“I’m not married, and I would never marry that bitch!”

Dan narrowed his eyes. “We got a wedding invitation from you and Lisa.”

~That bitch again.~

I closed my eyes against the agonizing pain radiating in my chest. What she would have felt seeing that fucking invitation.

I tilted my head up, counting to ten until I felt relatively calmer. “Listen to me, and don’t interrupt until I’m finished,” I gritted as I waged an internal war.

At the tone of my voice, they straightened in their seats, giving me their full attention.

I wanted to tell Melody everything, but she wasn’t ready to talk to me, and I didn’t think she would ever be after…

For a moment, I considered whether to tell them or not, but this was the only way she would know I hadn’t betrayed her. I never would have.

The hole in my heart and the ache in my chest were all constant reminders that I’d lost Melody by making one stupid decision.

So I started telling them exactly what had happened. During the whole time, I saw different emotions on their faces.

No word was spoken for minutes. I heard a sob from behind me, but I didn’t turn.

I felt good knowing that she’d heard everything. I felt lighter and less burdened, no longer weighed down by the secret I’d carried in my heart.

Now she finally knew I hadn’t betrayed her. She was the only one for me and always would be.

Dan cleared his throat. “So you still haven’t found that tape?”

I shook my head. “I tried everything, hacked her laptop, her phone. Her pen drives, hard drive.” I shrugged and glanced at Matt. His mouth was agape, and his skin was ashen white.

I saw the pain brewing in his eyes, like he’d already put the pieces together.

“Can we talk alone?” I asked Matt.

He nodded, and we both stood and headed to an empty room. Once inside the room, he turned, crossing his arms. “I’m not breaking up with her. I have loved her since high school.”

I nodded. “I’m not asking you to break up with her. I just want to tell you I’m stepping back because I’ll be a constant reminder of what she lost and the pain she endured.

“I have hurt her enough, and I don’t want to hurt her again. If she’s happy with you, I’m happy for her. Just don’t hurt her like I did.”

I placed my hand on his shoulder, giving a friendly squeeze. I walked out.

“I should get going,” I said to Dan and the others standing in the hall and left without a backward glance.

As I reached the lobby, I heard someone calling my name and saw Mia running toward me. She stopped in front of me and gave me a packet.

I looked at her questioningly, and she turned her head slightly. I followed her direction and saw Melody.

I took a step toward her, but she shook her head to stop me.

I sighed and stopped, no matter how much I wanted to go and pull her into my arms to feel her. I opened the packet. My chest splintered with pain.

It caused my eyes to glass over with tears. She was returning the pendant I’d given her as a promise for our future. I looked in her direction. Her body shook, and she was crying too.

~This is the end, huh?~ I raised my eyebrow in question.

She turned her back to me. Ignoring the pain in my heart, I took out the other pendant. It was a cross that she always wore. Why was she giving this to me?

I tried to open the letter, but Mia stopped me. “Not here,” she said and walked away. I looked in Melody’s direction, and her back was still toward me.

I waited for her to look at me one last time, and she turned. My heart banged so violently against my chest, I felt the vibrations in my throat. I wanted to scream.

I still loved her; she was the only woman in my life. I wanted to be selfish, but I couldn’t, not after the pain I’d caused her.

Matt came from behind her. He cupped her cheeks and asked something, to which she nodded in answer. Matt smiled and leaned down to kiss her.

My heart dropped, all the way down to the soles of my feet, and it felt like someone had just stomped all over it.

It hurt.

Watching Melody with another man hurt more than I’d ever thought possible.

But this was what she needed, the one who would always make her his first priority, who would understand her.

She wouldn’t be able to come first for me, because I had Mila. Once I had sole custody of her, she would need me more than ever.

I sighed and watched them going back to their suite. I called a cab and headed straight to the airport.

In the cab, I sat back and relaxed a little on the back seat. I opened the letter.

~This cross pendant is a pen drive. Lisa has a similar one. We bought them together. She always takes off the pendant before taking a bath.~

~The rest you know.~

~And there are a few pictures of Owen I thought you would want to see…~

~Goodbye, Xavier…~

~Melody.~

Pain lanced through my chest, making me wince. I took out my phone and texted her to thank her for the pictures.

And I sent another text to Gunner to let him know I was coming.