Chapter 23: Chapter 23

EVIE

The thought of ever seeing Russell, the wolf, again never crossed my mind. I didn’t even consider it a possibility. The moment I walked into that office and locked eyes with his icy, unforgiving gaze was the most terrifying experience I’ve had since the day he tore me apart with his wolf eyes.

I couldn’t bear to be in the same building as him. Noah wanted me to wait for him on the alpha floor, but I just couldn’t. I pushed past Sawyer and made a beeline for the exit.

“Evie! Where are you going?” Sawyer’s voice echoed behind me as I bolted out the door.

“I can’t stay here, Sawyer, I need to get out,” I replied.

“What are you going to do? Walk?” Sawyer questioned as I stormed down the steps, distancing myself from the pack house.

“If I have to,” I retorted.

I didn’t care about not having a car; I just needed to escape. I heard Sawyer sigh heavily behind me before he caught up to me.

“Let me drive you.” He offered, gently grabbing my elbow and guiding me toward the parking garage.

I agreed, albeit reluctantly.

“Noah isn’t going to be happy about this,” Sawyer warned as he drove us to my apartment.

“Well, he’s just going to have to deal with it,” I muttered.

Sawyer sighed. “You really don’t understand this mate bond thing, do you?” He chuckled.

“I get it, Sawyer, but Noah needs to realize that I’m still human. It can’t always be about satisfying his needs,” I snapped back.

I knew it wasn’t fair to label Noah as selfish; he was anything but. Sawyer was just pushing my buttons and testing my patience. He pressed his lips together and—thankfully—stayed quiet for the rest of the drive.

We arrived at my place and I practically leapt out of the car. Sawyer started to get out too, but I told him to go home.

“I’m okay, Sawyer. I don’t need a babysitter.”

Sawyer grumbled. “I should stay. You might not be safe, Evie.”

“I’m fine. Go,” I grumbled back before slamming my front door in Sawyer’s face.

I had a nagging feeling that Sawyer wasn’t going to leave, but at that moment, I didn’t care as long as he wasn’t inside my house, hovering over me.

I paced around my living room and kitchen, lost in my thoughts. I felt vulnerable and exposed. Logically, staying with Noah would have been the smarter choice. I would have been safer and more protected, but I couldn’t bear to be anywhere near Russell.

After some time, there was a knock at my door. I sighed, knowing exactly who it was.

I opened the door to find a very worried and angry-looking Noah. I leaned against the door frame, blocking his entry into my apartment.

“I’m okay, Noah,” I grumbled.

“You scared the hell out of me, Everleigh.” Noah was barely holding it together.

“I needed to get away,” I explained.

“You’re not safe here,” he countered.

“I’m perfectly fine here. This is my home,” I argued back, crossing my arms over my chest.

“No, you’re not, not if I’m not here,” Noah retorted.

I remembered when Noah first explained the mate bond to me. He said he felt protective of my safety, that the only safe place was with him. I sighed, trying to respect his needs.

“Sawyer came with me and I’m pretty sure he didn’t leave,” I pointed out, raising an eyebrow at him.

Noah remained silent, which was all the confirmation I needed.

“Thought so. You can leave Sawyer outside if that makes you feel better, but I need some space,” I told him.

“I’m not okay with this, Evie,” Noah’s voice was strained and tense, more so than I’ve ever heard before.

“I’m sorry, but I’m not okay with any of this right now. I need some time alone to think. I don’t feel safe at the pack house with you,” I confessed, instantly regretting my words.

Noah’s face twisted as if I had just punched him in the gut. He staggered back from the impact of my words.

“You don’t feel safe with me?” Noah whimpered.

I rubbed my arms, trying to ward off the chill that had settled between us.

“I’m not feeling secure right now, Noah. It’s not about you. I just need some time,” I reiterated.

It wasn’t that I was mad at Noah, but I wasn’t accustomed to constantly being in the company of others. I needed some alone time to sort through my feelings and thoughts. Seeing the hurt etched on Noah’s face almost made me break down.

“Sawyer will be outside, ensuring your safety,” Noah murmured, moving away from the door.

“All right,” I responded, a sense of defeat washing over me.

“Evie, I’m here for you, whenever you need me,” he said, his voice heavy with sadness before he turned and walked away.

I let out a sigh, closed the door, and leaned against it, my eyes shut tight. I despised myself for causing Noah pain. It felt as if he was taking a piece of my heart with him as he left. I flopped onto the couch, feeling overwhelmed, and buried my face in a cushion, letting out a muffled scream of frustration.

Eventually, exhaustion took over and I fell asleep on the couch, too tired to worry any longer. I spent the entire weekend in emotional turmoil. I paced around the apartment, watched Sawyer and the other wolves who took turns guarding me from my window, and vented my frustrations to myself. I couldn’t bring myself to call Noah, knowing it was probably tearing him apart.

I wasn’t sure what I expected to achieve from my weekend of brooding, but when Monday arrived and I was still feeling miserable, I knew I hadn’t achieved it.

I dragged myself to campus, completely worn out. I had dark circles under my eyes that I didn’t even attempt to conceal. My hair was pulled up in a messy bun after my early morning shower. I was dressed in a baggy T-shirt and joggers. Sawyer trailed behind me at a distance, and I chose to ignore him.

After my first class, I exited the fine arts building and bumped into Molly. I groaned, stepped back, and walked around her. Molly quickly caught up with me.

“Are you okay?” Molly inquired.

“No,” I replied curtly.

“Noah isn’t either,” Molly retorted.

I glanced at her, trying to determine if I was imagining the smugness in her voice.

“What do you want, Molly?” I snapped.

“Why are you making both yourself and him miserable?” she questioned.

“You wouldn’t get it,” I retorted, quickening my pace toward my next class.

“Why? Because I’m not human?”

I stopped in my tracks and turned to face Molly.

“Yes, Molly, because you’re not human. You can pretend to understand my situation all you want, but the truth is, you don’t. None of you do. I’m completely alone in this.”

“When I say I need time, I’m not kidding. Just leave me be,” I said harshly, pushing past her.

I knew Sawyer was somewhere nearby, and he could console his sister.

I sat through my second class in a foul mood. I absentmindedly flipped through the book we were discussing in the English Literature seminar, feeling guilty about how I had treated Molly.

She was only trying to help, and I let my frustrations get the better of me. By the time the class ended, I had convinced myself to text Molly on my way to my last class and invite her to lunch so I could apologize.

As I stepped out of the English building, I was instantly engulfed in chaos. Students were running around the campus, screaming, while campus police and professors were directing them away from the courtyard.

I stood rooted to the spot, transfixed by the scene unfolding before me.