Chapter 1: Prologue

PROLOGUE

Man up, Travis. Man the fuck up! There’s only one more week of school left and you’re a senior, if you don’t ask him out now you’ll never get the chance again. Christ, I really need to stop talking to myself.  Sighing, I push myself from the wall where I had been watching Seth. He’ so freaking gorgeous and adorable. I just want to wrap up in a blanket and cuddle with him.  I’m really getting a head of myself.

Pushing myself from my stalker wall, I suck in a breath of fresh air and let it out slowly. Why am I shy all of a sudden? I’m never shy, I see something I like I go for it. That’s why it doesn’t make sense to me why I haven’t had the courage to ask Seth out since I knocked him down in the hallway a year ago. That was the first time I saw him and apparently we went to the same grammar school and he’s being going to this High School since the start. Man, I felt like an idiot.

He’s so gorgeous. I couldn’t help but sigh as I looked at him. His flawless face, his pretty blue eyes that match perfectly with his dark brown hair, that freaking adorable smile of his that takes my breath away every time I see it. Christ, I could tie him up just so that I can stare at him all day. Don’t get me started on his voice. He has one of those voices that make you wish he wouldn’t shut up. It’s not just his voice it’s the way he speaks. He could be saying “I lost my virginity in the back of a truck” and it would be the most intelligent mesmerizing thing.

He just has this way about him. He’s calm and simple. He’s always by himself and I notice that’s a choice because he has friends. He’s smart but he’s not one of those obnoxious over achiever that wants to set the world on fire because he got a B plus for a grade, “It could have been worst” I heard him say to a friend of his once. To hear him say that made me smile. It’s always attractive when a person tries to make the best out of things instead of looking on the downside.

“Travis!” Awe fuck me! I’ve been standing in front of him this entire time. “Can I help you with something?”

“U-h-oh, no, sorry,” I stuttered then walked off. I blew it!

“All righty then,” he mumbled. My embarrassment went away as I thought how adorable it was that he sounded so confused.

“Would you like to go for coffee or something after school?” I blurted! As the words left my lips I wanted to run away again and go hide behind my stalker wall.

“Are you talking to me?” He asked. I turned to see his pretty face frowning.

“Yes,” I answered, I could feel the real me slowly returning. I got this. “I’m asking you out…for coffee—or any beverage of your choice”

“You’re—You’re gay?” His eyes were wide as he asked this. I just wanted to kiss him. He’s so cute.

“Pretty much,” I answered, chuckling a bit.

“Iced coffee is fine,” he said, his cheeks a nice shade of pink.

Fuck yeah! “Cool, I’ll meet you here at your locker after school then.” He nodded then waved goodbye to me. I waved back then went behind my stalker wall. I fist pumped and did my happy dance! “Do the running man! Do the running man!” I sang in a whispered voice. I jumped and touched the heels of my Jordans together.

“I’m guessing he said yes?” I heard Nigel’s voice asked. It startled me a bit but I’ll keep that to myself.

Turning around, I couldn’t help the big grin that made its way unto my face. “He said yes!” He grinned too before running to me and engulfing me in a big bear hug.

“Don’t fuck it up!” He warned, knowing I can be pretty stupid sometimes. “You’ve been secretly, stalking, caring, creeping, dreaming, coming—”

“That was just one dream,” I cut in.

“—Wishing, yearning, for that boy for a year now! And to think you never recognized him before? Wow—and yeah, sure, one dream. Travis, we sleep in the same bed at least twice a week, it wasn’t just one dream,” he said matter-of-factly. I scoffed and walked away, knowing damn well what he was talking about. So what if I was dreaming and almost fucked him thinking he was Seth. It was a dream, I can’t be held responsible for my actions if I’m dreaming.

I was lucky that it was Nigel though. The only straight friend I have that accepted me and who I am. I’m lucky my parents did too. My mom didn’t at first but she eventually came around. Even when she wasn’t speaking to me she never said one harsh word to me. She still came into my room to make sure I was up for school. She still left my breakfast on the table and made sure I ate before I left for school. It was those little things that showed me she cared and I didn’t push her. I wasn’t mad at her, I just waited patiently until she came around, and so did dad. My older brother and my younger sister accepted me. I really did get lucky with my family.

As I watched the clock behind the teacher on the wall, my right foot started jumping. Seconds after that my entire body felt like it was on vibrate mode. Five minutes, left. Five fucking minutes…Oh God, I’m going to die…I’m going to die! Distraction, I need distracting.

Taking my iPod from my pocket, I sat out on my chair so that I could put my hand underneath my desk without looking suspicious. Looking up, I take note of where the teacher was to see if he was too engrossed in whatever the fuck he was talking about to notice that I wasn’t paying attention. Much to my satisfaction, he was. He was only going over stuff about the final exam we just took. About how our grades will be sorted and crap like that. To distract myself I started playing Temple Run. This game is so much fun. Run, jump, jump, swipe, slide…oh fuck, I jumped into the river. Stupid shit! And that’s how I spent the next five minutes of class. When the bell rang I’m sure if I could I would have ran right through the wall instead of packing up behind these kids to get out. The closer I get to his locker the more nervous I got. Why does he always make me so nervous?

“This is ridiculous,” I mumbled to myself.

“I hope you’re not talking about our date,” a voice said next to me. Startled, I almost jumped into the locker. He raised a brow, looking at me questioningly.

“I’m not talking about our date,” I said, looking at him as we walk side by side now. It felt good.

“What then?” He asked back quickly. “That’s if you don’t mind sharing”

As I watch him, how he moved through the crowded hallway, trying not to bump into anyone, I knew I could tell him my darkest secrets and he wouldn’t look at me differently. “It’s ridiculous how nervous I am. But I’m only nervous because I like you very much.” I got chills confessing that to him. He bit the corner of his lips, trying to hide his smile.

“So am I—I mean I’m nervous but only because I like you too”

“Are you?” I asked, a smirk pulling at my lips. He released the textbook he was cradling against his chest to show me his hands. I was shocked. He was really nervous, more than I was. His hand looked like an earthquake was going through it. I grabbed his hand and thread my fingers through his. “I’ll take care of this for you,” I said. He didn’t pull his hand away but gave mine a gentle squeeze. As we walked, people were staring at us. Mostly because only a handful of people knew that I was gay. The rest of the school I didn’t care about. Who are they to me? I’m not obligated to tell them anything and they don’t need to know anything.

We went to Seth’s locker and he put all his stuff in there. As soon as he got everything in I laced our fingers again. It was the end of the school year and teacher’s stopped giving homework a week ago so we wouldn’t need our books. The shopping center was only a few blocks away from school and I only lived a few blocks from school so it was unnecessary to drive. “Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?” I asked Seth as I squeezed his hand gently. He pointed to the Starbucks on the opposite side of street. We went in and I asked him what he wanted. I ordered a Mint Mocha Frappuccino for him with a big pile of whip cream—as requested by him—and I ordered a Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino for myself. With a little fuss, I paid for our beverages and made sure he didn’t want anything else then we left. “So,” I droned, making Seth look at me weird. The look on his face was funny but I tried not to laugh by wrapping my lips around my straw and sucking the crap out of my Mocha Cookie Crumble.

“So,” He responded, using the same tone I did.

“Tell me more about you”

I listened carefully as he told me first about his parents. He said he loved his mom dearly but he’s been finding himself questioning if she cares about him, which made me sad. He said his dad is a prick and because of that he stay out of his way. It’s never good when they’re in the same room at the same time. Which is hard to do because his dad doesn’t work so he’s home most of the time and that’s why Seth stays out a lot. He has a little sister and an older brother like I do except his sister is a little girl and mine goes to our high school. Then he told me the simpler things. His favorite color is red, he likes to draw and make flipbooks. I asked him to make me one and he said he would. He also said he liked movies; he could sit and watch movies all day as long as it wasn’t a musical. I agreed wholeheartedly.

After he ran out of things to share, I told him a little about myself. Which was the same as his, basically. We had a lot of things in common except my favorite color was blue. When I told him that he said, “We could make purple”. It was cute and funny. “Would you like to try mine?” He asked.

“Only if you feed it to me,” I answered, raising a challenging brow. He laughed softly, shaking his head but put it up to my mouth anyways. It tasted really good. I offered him some of mine, putting the straw to his lips. As I looked at his pink lips wrapped around the straw I couldn’t help but think how sensual that was. He pulled his lips from the straw slowly and I had to look away. I didn’t want him thinking that this was about sex for me because it wasn’t. But I’m a hormonal teenager so I can’t be blamed for reacting certain ways. “Would you like something to eat?” I asked as we dumped our empty cups in a garbage can on the side of the street.

He looked up at me, his beautiful blue eyes shinning. “No, thank you. I’m not hungry”

“You could have said yes and give me an excuse to spend some more time with you,” I chuckled.

“Or…” he droned, jumping in front of me, effectively getting me to stop. “You could have just asked to spend some more time with me”

“True,” I concurred. Damn those lips, I cursed mentally. I’ve never wanted to kiss someone so much. Distracting my thoughts from his lips, I tuck the few strands of hair sticking out from the rest behind his ear. He shivered when my fingertips touched the tip of his ear. We locked eyes and I don’t know how long we were standing there just staring in each other’s eyes and breathing, completely forgetting about the world around us.

“You know,” he began. “I’m kind of a cheesy romantic…”

“And?” I asked, wondering where he’s going with this.

“And I’ve always wanted to be kissed in the rain”

Wow “I’d be more than happy to fulfill your fantasy, Seth, but there is no rain”

“Wait for it,” he whispered. I opened my mouth to ask him what are we waiting for, only to have him put his index finger on my lips. The temptation to open my mouth and suck on his finger was sky high, but I refrained. Suddenly, the rain just came pouring down. No drizzle, or tiny droplets just full-blown rain, soaking us in seconds. “So?” He asked. I got the hint and slowly leaned forward to press my lips against his. I let it rest for a few seconds before slowly started moving them against his and he reacted, kissing me back. The sound of his moan was barely audible over the rain. The Mint Mocha taste coming from Seth mixing with the taste of my Mocha Cookie Crumble was erotic to me.

His hand rest on my hips as mine held his face firmly to deepen our kiss. Our tongues touched and it wasn’t the fact that I’m soaking wet that sent a shiver down my spine. Our kiss was so passionate my heart was beating at a very unhealthy speed. To top that off, every nerve in body was alive. So were the hairs on my back and arms. This kiss, hips lips, his passion, the emotion I could feel him giving to me, was more than I imagined. It exceeded my expectations and made me want to hold onto it forever, to cherish it and remember it as the best moment of my entire life.

We pulled apart, breathing heavily with our foreheads pressed together and soaking wet. “Wow,” Seth breathed…then he sneezed.

“You’re going to get sick!” I said, panic taking over. I grab his hand and started running. His laugh sounded behind me as we ran to my house. It only took us ten minutes but we got there.

“Are your parents home?”

“Nope”

“Oh my God,” he gasped as we entered the house. Deciding I’ll hear what his problem was later, I ran to the guest bathroom and grabbed a few towels. I went back to Seth and began drying him off.

“’Oh my God’ what?”

He looked at me like what the fuck, and then a look of realization took over. “Oh, the house, it’s freaking huge and gorgeous”

“Thanks, my mom designed it. Come on let me get you a change of clothes”

“You don’t have to,” his sweet voice mumbled.

“It wasn’t a discussion, Seth.” I smiled when I heard him following me up the stairs. My room was at one of the far corners of the house. I asked to have it moved because it had a balcony and I kind of grew out my old room. “You can go in the bathroom.” I point to the en suite. “And I’ll bring you something you can wear then I’ll put your clothes in the dryer.” He nodded and went into the bathroom. I picked out the smallest basketball shorts I had and a plain grey t-shirt for him to wear.

I opened the bathroom and I was stunned to horniness at his beautiful naked chest and toned legs. “Christ!” The sound of Seth’s gasp caused my eyes to snap up to his after taking in ever inch of his exposed skin. He looked so breathtaking I just wanted to eat him up. I dropped the clothes in my hand, close the space between us and kissed him passionately. He moaned in my mouth, wrapping his arms around my neck. Groaning, I pulled him closer to me and deepened the kiss, prying his mouth open with my tongue and tasting his mouth. He still tasted of Mint Mocha and it only fueled my sudden need to ravish him.

My hands, working on their own, slid down his back that felt smooth and silky beneath my fingers to grab his ass. He moaned into my mouth again, pushing his body closer to mine. Grabbing his waist, I spun us around and press him against the shower glass. His lips, his taste, just his kiss in general was like ecstasy and I felt like I couldn’t get enough.

Moving from his lips, I kissed then gentle sucked on his earlobe. He shuddered and I felt him gripping my shirt. Wanting to give him more pleasure, I nipped and kissed my way down until I was at his neck where I nibbled and suck all over it until I found his soft spot. When I did, he gasp and his hips bucked, causing his hard on to rub against mine. Oh God, what am I doing. I pulled away and looked at him. His eyes were a darker shade of blue and full of lust. “Do you want this?” I asked. I wanted him badly and I knew we should be taking this slow but I couldn’t help how I feel. But if he said he didn’t I’m going to be in desperate need of a cold shower.

“Yes!” He rasped and that’s all he had to say. I pulled him to me, kissing him passionately as my hands roamed every inch of his body again. He was so perfect, just perfect for me. I grabbed his ass and squeezed them. Feeling his firm cheeks in my hand aroused me so much and the way he moaned and kissed me harder every time I applied pressure was a bonus.

I lift him up and he automatically wrapped his legs around my waist then we were on our way to my bed. Thank God no one is home right now. I threw him on my bed and he barely bounced because my mattress was sturdy and it was a platform bed that was just a few feet off the ground due to the drawers. He watched me with dark eyes as I undressed, dropping my wet clothes on the floor. I strip completely naked and watch his eyes widened as he stared at me—one area in particular.

Opening one of the drawers on the side of my bed, I pulled out a condom and lube. Seth looked at me with a raised brow causing me to chuckle. “I’m a guy it’s normal to have this stuff”

“Right,” he murmured. I bit my bottom lip as I slowly, teasingly, pulled his boxers off. He moaned, making my member twitch. The instant the sound left his lips his cheeks turned pink and he covered his face. I took his member in my hand and started stroking him. I watched as he became completely unraveled and his shyness dissipated. Leaning forward, I twirl my tongue around his nipple, alternating between sucking and teasing then moved to the next one. His hand gripped my hair as his moans became louder and I felt his hips undulating as I stroked his member.

“Travis,” he moaned. His hand left my hair and was now gripping the sheets. “Hmm!” I watched his face, loving how his eyes close tight, his chest heaving and his breaths coming it in pants.

I could see he was trying to hold back so I nibbled on his ears then whispered, “Let it out”

Just like that his back arched off the bed as he moaned loudly and released all over my hand and chest. I let him ride out is orgasm before letting him go. I wiped his essence off of my hand and chest with my damp shirt that was on the ground.

I wrap my lips around his member, licking off his release and bringing him back to life again. Once he started moaning like before, I released him then moved up to kiss his lips. He kissed me back passionately, his hands feeling me up wherever he could reach. “Are you sure?” I asked again, just to make sure.

“Yes.” I smiled at how confident he sounded but I could see it in his eyes that he was nervous.

He watched me as I put a generous amount of lube on my finger. Moving up his chest, I turned my head to the side and kissed him deeply. He moaned but it was muffled by mouth. He tried to get some sort of release by grinding his member on my stomach. I let him as I slowly pushed a finger inside him. He cringed then I felt his muscles tightening.

“Seth, Relax.” He took a deep breath and I felt him loosening up immediately. I started moving it in and out slowly. His breaths were coming out in pants again. I bit my lip and enjoyed watching him for a while before adding another finger. He tensed up but relaxed seconds later. Why is he tensing up so much?

As soon as the pain subsided he began moving against my fingers, forcing them further into him. He pinched his hardened bud as he continued moving—and I helped. I pushed my middle finger in and curled it, feeling that hardened bundle of nerves. I watched him keenly then pushed against it.

“Oh fuck!” I smirked and continued to hit it as he screamed and moaned my name over and over, getting me hard as a rock. I put the condom on and poured some lube on my tip and rubbed it down the rest of my shaft. I pulled the cover over us just incase someone was to walk in then we’d be safe—somewhat.

“Ready?” He responded by spreading his legs further and pulling me down to for a heated kiss. I laced my fingers through his, bringing them above his head then pushed into him slowly, swallowing his whimpers.

“You’re so fucking tight, Seth”

“Shit! Fuck! Shit!” He swore as I pushed in further and further until he cried out then I stopped.

Oh my God, He's so fucking tight. Wait a minute…“Are-are you…Seth, are you a virgin?”  His cheeks turned red and I knew my answer. Fucking hell. I started pulling out but he wrapped his legs around my waist, holding me in place.

“Please don’t,” He begged.

“Seth, I don’t want you to regret anything and if this is your first time it should be more special and you should wait”

“I won’t regret it, I know I won’t. I’ve never wanted to give myself to someone until you knocked me over in the hallway a year ago and every time you ever waved to me. It’s what I want, please give this to me.” Even though I didn’t have the guts to resist him anything he wanted he didn’t wait for me to say anything, instead he wiggled his hips and tightened his muscles around me, making me forget why I wanted to stop in the first place.

I smashed my lips against his, kissing him feverously, silencing his whimpered cries of pain. We continued to kiss as I waited for the pain to go away. He did that thing with his hips again that I know I’m going to love so much, silently telling me to move. I did so, thrusting slowly as I waiting for him to adjust some more. A few thrusts in, he began moaning and moving his hips, telling me he wanted more so I gave it to him. I rotate my hips as I pushed into him, going deeper with each thrust.

“Oh, Travis,” he moaned. That sound set my body and fire and I started moving faster, moaning and groaning along with him. It felt so good. And what made it better is that it didn’t feel like just sex. I felt something deeper and I knew he did too by the way he gripped my hand tightly.

He moaned loudly, arching his back and I knew my tip brushed that sweet spot of his. I continued my violent torture on that spot, going harder and faster as he begged me to, locking his legs around my waist and demanding me not to stop. “Seth!” I moaned. He was so tight and I don’t know how he could be a virgin and knew how to clench his muscles and moved his hips just the right way to give us more pleasure. He must be one of those people who were just born to be a good lover—a sex god.

“I’m—”

“Me too.” His hands reached between us and he started pumping his member. Seconds later he came with a loud scream, his back arching high off the bed. His face looked so damn erotic and sexy. To add to that his muscles clenched and squeezed my member inside of him, giving me a powerful orgasm.

I lied on top of him, both of us breathing heavily. Our hands that were laced together didn’t have the strength to hold on anymore. His hand went to join the other that was resting on my back.

When I found the strength, I went to the bathroom to dispose of the condom and cleaned myself up. I went back to the room to find Seth already falling asleep. I cleaned him up to then cuddled up next to him and pulling him into my arms, “Do you have to go home soon?” I asked, brushing his sweat sleeked hair. He shook his head then wrapped his arm across my torso and went to sleep. I followed shortly after.

Two hours later, I woke up with an empty arm and a Seth-less bed. The first place I went was the bathroom to check if he was in there but he wasn’t. I put some clothes then went to check the rest of the house but he wasn’t there either. After going back to my room, I realized he took his clothes and the clothes that I had picked out for him was folded neatly on my bathroom sink. I looked around the room for a note but I didn’t see any. I picked up my phone to call him only to realize I didn’t have his fucking number. Now I’m losing my fucking my mind.

What now? Like a shinning star, the aluminum exterior of my laptop brightened up the room. I logged on to Facebook to check to see if he was online but he wasn’t. Like the stalker I am, I had sent him a Facebook request a long time ago. I only liked his pictures if he posted one that I like or a status if I agreed with what he said.

I went on his profile and clicked the message button, only I didn’t know what to say to him. I don’t know what was going through his head and I don’t understand how he would just leave like that. Did he use me for sex? Doubtful. He was a virgin and that I’m sure of because I felt it. My member still throbbed a little from being sucked in by his tight passage.

Placing my hand over the home row keys, I allowed my fingers to do the talking.

Why did you leave? I’m sorry if you regret what we did but I don’t want to forget—I don’t want to act like nothing happened between us when I see you tomorrow. I would still like to date you. What do you say?

I sent the message and waited for his response. My laptop didn’t left my sight until I fell asleep in front of it around two o’clock in the morning and there was still no reply. When I woke up I couldn’t wait to go to school. If he’s ashamed or embarrassed it’s easy for him to do so and avoid me but he can’t avoid me at school and he’ll have to tell me what’s going on in his head when I see him.

Seth wasn’t in school today. Which is weird, because he never missed a day of school since I recognized him. I went to the Vice Principals office to check the attendance sheet and he wasn’t there. He wasn’t in for four days straight. I left him message after message on Facebook. My message went from scared and worried, to doubtful, to embarrassment, to me begging for his forgiveness for not waiting for us to have sex. I’m pathetic, I know.

Nigel was searching for me so I was ditching him. I don’t want to tell him what happened because I may break down and cry. If I cry that will be the end and I’ll lose all hope of him responding to my message or showing up at my house to give me some sort of explanation.

Just as I rounded a corner, I saw Seth exiting the school through the main door. I ran down the hall and out the school doors. As I exit, a grey Honda drove by slowly and I saw Seth. Our eyes connected and they pooled up with tears. He waved to me but he wasn’t saying hi, he was saying goodbye.

I went home after that to sign on on Facebook to message Seth again. Something stopped me from doing so. Seth posted a status, just two words and a letter.

I’m sorry, T.

I went on his profile and hit the un-friend button. If that’s the best he can give me after I sent so many messages to him he can go to hell. Tomorrow is graduation. I’m going to graduate, make my parents, my brother and my sister proud. I’m going to go to college and forget about Seth Winters, the boy who stole my heart.

A/N

This is my other new boyxboy story. So I’ll be working on two awesome stories for you guys who will be missing Will and Sage as they have come to an end.

Thoughts?