Chapter 15: Chapter Fourteen

I lost him. He’s no longer the person he was when I saw him that first of class, a week after that, and a week ago. All he does is work, sleep, barely eat, and study. No matter how hard I try to talk to him I can’t get through. He still refuses to go see his sister. He doesn’t think he can live with the pain of seeing her in a vegetative state. He said he needed time before he even thinks about seeing her. From what Hunter said their father, Vince, visit Amelia and his wife from time to time. He also told me that he doesn’t blame Seth because if he was home he wasn’t sure if he could see her.

When he called to apologize to Seth all Seth said was, “Okay” then he spoke to him for a few seconds and hung up. As I was waiting for one of my parents to call I opened Photo Booth and decided to talk to my camera as part of the assignment.

“Travis here,” I stared. “I’m worried about Seth. He’s uh—he’s going through a tough time and I thought when he opened up to me he would trust me to help him but instead he has completely shut down. His hair is all messy and he stopped shaving again. I’m not even sure if he knows how to articulate a proper sentence anymore. Everything he says is all mumbled. I don’t know what to do. I’ve never felt so helpless in my life. I just want to help him. That’s it for now, I guess.” I sighed and stared at my image on the screen. I looked like crap. With another sigh, I moved the cursor and clicked the box in the circle that would end my video.

I wondered aimlessly on the Internet until Skype started ringing. I answered the call and waited to see which of parents face appeared. Turns out it was my dad.

“Travis? You look like shit,” said the man who’s not fund of swearing.

“Thanks, dad,” I mumbled, rolling my eyes.

“How’s the boyfriend? He asked, smirking.

“Dad,” I groaned. “Not the time for your teasing”

“What’s going on?”

“He told me why he left.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. It’s horrible. There was an accident with his mom and sister. His mom had mental breakdown, basically and tried to run her car off of the bridge—”

“But it collided with a trunk instead. It was all over the news, Travis”

“Are you serious? Now I feel like shit. Fuck!” I said exasperated. All this time I was fucking moping around so caught up in my feelings and didn’t even know what was going on around me.

“Travis, don’t beat yourself up. The past is the past and there’s nothing you can do to change it”

“You’re right.” I sighed. “I just don’t know what to do”

“When your mom’s parents kicked her out because she was pregnant with your brother and mine cut me off, she became someone I didn’t recognize anymore. I’m not telling you to do this but I dumped her in a bath of water—”

“And you’re alive to tell this?” I questioned dubiously. I love my mom with all my heart but that woman is crazy.

“I can’t believe it myself,” my dad said. He really looked like he couldn’t believe it. “Anyways, that woke her up and I just simply asked her to go for a walk and she opened up to me. Things didn’t get better for us but I was able to be there for her—for each other, and work through the difficulties. Again, I’m not saying you should dump him in a bath of water but maybe he just needs a little push”

“Okay,” I nodded and smiled. “A little push. Where are the ladies in your life?”

“They’re sleeping. Michaela got suspended for breaking this kid’s arm and his nose. Apparently, he was picking on a little girl and she wasn’t having that. Now we have huge hospital bill to pay because the kid needs surgery.” I thought I heard keys jingling so I quickly hit the mute button on the keyboard. Keys were indeed jingling.

“Seth’s home,” I whispered to my dad.

“Good luck, love you.” And the call ended. Ugh. I shut the desktop down and went to my room to grab the camcorder. I turned it on and started recording as I walked to the kitchen where Seth was. It was a Sony HD Handycam.

“Hey,” I said to Seth.

He had a bottle of Snapple to his lips, frowning as he covered it and looked at me. “What’s with the camera?” He asked. His voice was so monotone and emotionless.

“Camcorder,” I corrected. He rolled his eyes but said nothing. “We have a project, remember? Your buddy, Dr. Gomez, thought this would be a good idea”

“How come we don’t have soda?” He’s completely ignoring me. Two can play that game.

“So my father was telling me that my little sister got suspended from school. She saw some kid picking on a little girl so she broke his arm and his nose.”

“Seriously?” I tried to hide the smile that so desperately wanted to make itself seen.

“Seriously. My parents have a huge hospital bill to pay.” I nodded my head for emphasis.

“What is she like Xena the warrior princess or something?” He still couldn’t believe she beat up a guy.

“Not far off,” I chuckled. “If you meet her, don’t get on her bad side”

“Why would I meet her?” And we’re back to his passiveness.

“Are you going to stay by yourself for thanksgiving?” He shrugged. I’m seriously considering dumping him in a bath of water right now. Cold water, might I add. I sighed. “Want to go to 7Eleven and get a big gulp?” For the first time in the last couple days, he smiled. “But we’re walking and I’m taking the camcorder.” He shrugged. “Hold this so I can go put on a hoodie and sneakers.” I walked up to the counter and hand it to him. He scanned it for a few seconds then turn it around so he was recording me. I flipped him off, rewarded with a smile.

“I can’t finish this shit,” I complained and dump the cup in a dumpster on the corner. “Hey, let’s go to the park.”

“I really want to just go home and—”

“And study?” I seethed. “That’s all you fucking do and I’m trying to help. You can’t ignore everything. You’re going to suffer the guilt all by yourself and it’s going to bite you in the ass. Let me help you, just talk to me. That is all I’m asking.”

“The camcorder is still on.”

“You’re so fucking annoying.” That’s it. I give up. What-fucking-ever.

“Hey,” he said, grabbing on to my hand as I crossed the street to go to the park. I snatched my hand away and continued walking. “I was being serious. I don’t want that to be on there so he can see it”

“It can be edited,” I said a little more calmly this time. “Besides, I think this is good. It can be a journal of some sort.” He nodded and we walked to the park in silence. I videoed random things to keep myself busy, like a squirrel running up a tree, squirrels playing or just being squirrels. Squirrels are weird and interesting. What the fuck am I thinking? I turned the camcorder on Seth and asked. “What’s the earliest memory you have?”

“Hmm,” he murmured the proceeded to put his thinking face on. “It’s kind of sad, well to me. I remember I wanted a dog and I kept telling this to Hunter—”

“And who’s Hunter?” I asked. Seth gave me a look that says ‘you know who Hunter is’ but I wouldn’t budge. “If Dr. Gomez is watching this he won’t know who Hunter is”

He rolled his eyes. “Hunter is my older brother and we’re really close. One day Hunter picked me up from school. I asked him if we could get ice cream and he told me know because we had to get home. I remember feeling really sad, I might have even cried. When we got home, turns out the reason he wanted us to go home so bad was because he got me a dog—a puppy, I should say. It was a Shiba Inu and I was so happy. I spent all afternoon playing with him and Hunter in the backyard.” He paused and walked towards the swings, I followed after him. He sat on a swing and started pushing it back and forth but his foot didn’t leave the ground. “My dad came home and he threw a fucking hissy fit and demanded we got it out the house.” He shrugged and started swinging for real this time. I didn’t stop recording him. He looked like he was free but at the same time like his mind was being overloaded.

He stopped, came over and took the camcorder and pointed it at me. “What’s the earliest memory you have, Travis Ortega?”

I thought about it and there was one memory clear to me. “When Mickey was born”

“Who’s Mickey?”

“My baby sister. Her name is actually Michaela but I call her Mickey”

“That’s cute,” he said and I chuckled.

“Yeah, I remember Christian—my older brother.” I added quickly. “And I’s sitter took us to the hospital and we went to my mom’s room. I remember her asking him to lift me up and she cuddled me into her arms and told me I had a baby sister. At the time it was the most exciting thing for me. I don’t know how I remember this so clearly, maybe because it meant a lot to me…I don’t know. Then my dad took me from her and asked if I wanted to see the baby and I said yes. Christian went with us and he pointed her out. She was so beautiful. We grew to be so close to each other. Then I don’t know when it happened but one day I realized Mickey wasn’t so adorable anymore.” Seth laughed. “Now she swears a lot and she’s always getting to fights. She’s a headache”

“It happens,” Seth said. I took the camcorder back and we exit the playground. I just realized we were the oldest in there and we looked so out of place and completely mental in there.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?”

He shrugged. “To be honest, I haven’t got a clue”

“Too much?” I asked. He nodded.

“We’ve come a long way, don’t you think? A month ago I couldn’t have said a simple ‘hi’ to you and you didn’t bite my head off.” It wasn’t a laughing matter but I found it really funny. Seth did too for he laughed a little. “Hmm,” he breathed out and I wonder what he was thinking.

“What is it?”

He shook his head. “Just wondered briefly what my future will look like”

I cleared my throat as Seth took a seat on a bench and I sat next to him. I turned the camcorder to the lake in front of us where a few birds and ducks were swimming. “Is there anything you’d like to talk about?” I turned the camcorder back on him.

“Am I a terrible person for not going to visit them?” He stared ahead as he asked this.

“I don’t think so,” I answered truthfully.

“Really?” he asked. It was rhetorical and very sarcastic. “Because I feel like I’m the most selfish person on the planet right now”

“Selfishness isn’t always a bad thing, Seth,” I told him. “Especially in your case. I mean you’ve been through a lot. Someone’s got to look out for you and if you have to be selfish to do so then so be it. You’re human and as humans there is only so much we can handle”

“I heard my mom’s very ill.”

“Do you want me turn this off?” I asked. I didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable, but he shook his head. “Ill?”

“Hunter said the nurses and psychologist told him that they don’t think she’s really aware of anything, that she doesn’t talk, not even when my father visits her. She has a picture of Amelia and that’s the only time she shows any kind of emotion. They say she’s getting worst. You’re good at the psychology thing too, what would you say that is? Oh, and she only responds to my father when he talks about Amelia.” He took the camcorder and pointed it at me.

“Remorse. That could be what’s making her more ill. She’s probably dealing with a lot of guilt and blaming herself for what happened. Did she have a better relationship with Amelia than you can remember her having with you or your brother?”

He snorted. “She didn’t care about me,” he said coldly. I don’t even think he cared that she didn’t, or he thought she didn’t. “But yeah, Amelia got everything she wanted, even if it meant we wouldn’t have money to buy groceries the next day”

“That’s even worse for her then,” I told him. He nodded and handed the camera back. It was getting late and the sun was going down. “Is there anything else you’d like to talk about?”

He shook is head. “But I think you should consider changing your major to psychology.” I smiled. “I think you would make a good therapist or psychiatrist”

“Thanks. We can head back now if you’d like.” He nodded and we left the park. On the way home, I, again, recorded random things. I should piss Dr. Gomez off by submitting a video of fucking squirrels doing their thing.

“Say ‘bye’ to the camera Seth,” I teased in a singing voice.

“Fuck off, Travis,” he said in the same singing voice. I saved the video and shut the camcorder off and put it to charge. I’m glad he’s feeling better. He told me he was going to take a shower then came back and said he was going to study a little. Thankfully I don’t have to study a lot. I remember ninety percent of what I read.

I had just changed into my pajamas when there was a knock on my door. Seth stood there, his eyes glued to my chest. I looked down and realized I was shirtless. He blushed bright red when he realized what I caught him doing. I didn’t care because I’ve checked him out in the most inappropriate ways too much time to count. I stared at his face as I waited for him to talk.

“Um.” He cleared his throat. “I was wondering if you would go with me to the hospital tomorrow?”

“Are you sure?” He nodded. “Okay.”

“Thank you…not just for agreeing to go with me but for everything”

“You’re welcome.” He smiled then went to his room.

I hope he’s really ready for this.

A/N

Sorry for taking so long but I wanted to make sure this was how I wanted the chapter to go. Hope you guys liked it.