Xavier froze for a while. He had tried his best to recall it, but he drew a blank.âXavier?â Josiah was worried that something had happened to Xavier when he noticed his unfocused eyes, so he gently patted his arm. âItâs fine if you canât remember. Just get well first.ââNo!â Xavier did not want to end the topic just yet. He grabbed Josiahâs arm. âItâs true that I donât remember much about what happened after Yulissa showed me the video, butââXavier drew his brows togetherââyou know that Jacintaâs words canât be fully trusted. Iâm still looking into her.ââI know,â Josiah answered. âWe havenât come to a conclusion for the fire at the Fairchild residence yet. Even now, I still think of Jacinta as a suspect. But, Xavier, as I said, I was walking in front of Rachel back then, and Winnie came down soon after me.
Just as she came out, Christopher fell onto the roof of the car. She asked Christopher about it.
Although Jacintaâs words canât be fully trusted, Christopher said your name. As far as I know, Christopher was an honest man. Do you think he would lie before he died?âXavier looked at Josiah in silence. A few seconds later, he frowned and asked, âDo you also think that I pushed Christopher off?
Do you think I killed him on purpose?ââThatâs not what Iâm saying, Xavier! Calm down,â Josiah replied.
âI just want to figure out what happened back then. You were involved, but you canât remember anything, and we canât trust Jacintaâs words. Thatâs why the only thing we can do now is to reason. No one knows what happenedâwhether it was you who made a mistake or it was someone else who pushed Christopher off. We know none of this right now.ââWhat about Yulissa?â Xavierâs frown deepened. âIs she saying the same things as Jacinta?ââShe⦠killed herself. You donât remember it, but she and Christopher are dead. Jacintaâs the only witness now.â Josiah sighed. âBut donât worry. Even if you did push Christopher off, itâs understandable. After all, you were in a terrible mental state at that time. You were a victim too.âA beat later, Josiah asked, âWhat did Yulissa show you that made you lose control?ââShe saidâ¦â Xavier started, Yulissaâs words ringing in his head again.She had said that Christopher and Winnie were willing to give up on their dignity for each other and that the two of them had made a promise to be together in their next lives.She even said that he had been cuckolded a long time ago. Without him, Winnie and Christopher would have been together.She also told him that everything Christopher did was to separate him and Winnie and that Christopher wanted him gone from this world.That was not all. In the end, she even told him that as long as he pushed Christopher off the building and killed him, Winnie would be his alone.Those were the things he could remember Yulissa telling him. What happened after that was something he could not remember at all.âI think I took a look at the video at that time. I saw Dumbo hugging Christopher, and Christopher wasnât wearing any clothes. I was reallyâ¦â Xavier could not continue as he tightened his fists. Seconds of silence later, he suddenly said to Josiah, âIâll turn myself in.ââWhat?â Josiah, who was still reeling in from the shock, was snapped back to reality by Xavierâs words.âWhy would you turn yourself in?â Regardless of everything, Josiah was on Xavierâs side. âI told you that you were a victim too. You canât be legally prosecuted for what happened while you were mentally unstable. If we go by the books, even if you want to turn yourself in, you canât do it in Avenport. Youâll have to go to Yeringham in Manchernius instead.ââIsâ¦
that so?â Xavier stiffened for a second before curling his lips into a bitter smile. âDo me a favor and ask Professor White whether or not the drug Yulissa injected me will affect my intellect.âJosiahâs jaw dropped. âI donât think thereâs any issues with your intellect if you can say that. Still, what prompted you to think that? Do you know how serious things will be if you turn yourself in?ââWhat prompted me to think that?â Xavier wondered out loud. âItâs because itâs very likely that I was the one who pushed him.
If thatâs the truth, Iâll have to bear the responsibility for that. Even Christopher himself said my name.ââThen maybeâ¦â Josiah did not wish to suspect Christopherâs involvement, but he could not truly dismiss that possibility either. âMaybe he said that on purpose. As Yulissa said, he wanted to sow discord between you and Winnie. Thatâs not completely impossible, is it?âXavier fell silent. He did not know the answer to that. Christopher was dead, and the dead could not prove his innocence.Josiah fell silent as well. Truth be told, he did not wish to do mindless guessing, but Xavier being the culprit was a genuine possibility.All of a sudden, a firm female voice rang out, breaking the silence in the air.âThatâs impossible. He would never do that. I have faith in him!âXavier recognized the voice even before the owner of the voice entered. He quickly got out of bed and hurried to the doorway.âWinnie!â Xavier pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly. âYouâre finally here. I miss you so much.âWinnie, however, did not respond to the hug.She looked past Xavierâs shoulders and met Josiahâs eyes.As she stared at him, she hissed, âHeâs dead, so can you stop the mindless guessing?âJosiah did not see her scolding coming, and he frowned in response.âI just refuse to believe that Xavier was the one who pushed Christopher off. I donât mean to tarnish Captain Bennettâs reputation; Iâm only mentioning one of the many possibilities.âWinnie closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. âThen Iâll tell you one more time that it is impossible.âJosiah tried to hold himself back, but he failed. âSo youâre telling me that Christopher is the only one who speaks the truth? Am I not even allowed to point out a possibility? If you believe in Christopherâs words, that means you think Xavier was the one who pushed him off. Is that what it is?âRage suddenly crashed into Josiah like a tidal wave as he continued, âI know youâve experienced some things with Christopherâeven life-and-death moments. But hereâs the thing, Winnie.
You, Xavier, and I have been through life-and-death moments too. When you wanted to head to that place to save your granny, Xavier and I went without a word of complaint. Do the perilous situations weâve been through and the injuries Xavier and I sustained mean nothing to you? Are we not worthy of your trust? Xavierâs head hasnât properly recovered, and Iâm still in a wheelchair. Yes, Christopherâs dead, but can only the dead gain your unwavering trust?â Winnie had been overwhelmed with fury earlier when she heard Josiahâs harsh words toward Christopher despite the latterâs tragic death. That was why she had been equally harsh with Josiah.She did not consider the consequences and did not expect Josiahâs response to be that bad.Taking in a deep breath, she said, âIâm sorry. Itâs not that I donât believe you, I just feel bad. I canât help the negative emotions from seeping out of me.âJosiah, too, felt that he had made a mountain out of a molehill, as Xavier did not even say anything.A pause later, Josiah said, âEnjoy your talk. Iâll excuse myself now. Anything I say is wrong anyway.âWith that, he wheeled himself out of the ward.Winnie turned to look at him. There were some things she wanted to say to him to diffuse the tension between them, but she was not in the mood to do that just yet.After Josiah left, Xavier and Winnie were the only ones left in the ward.Xavier had already let go of Winnie when Winnie began arguing with Josiah.Now that Josiah was gone, Xavier did not hold himself back from staring at Winnie in silence.Winnie lifted her head to glance at Xavier before helping him sit up from the bed.However, Winnie remained standing.Seeing that, Xavier held her hand to guide her to sit down beside him.Winnie continued to stay quiet, her silence fueled by guilt.Not long after she returned, the police had come to get a statement from her.She and Christopher had sent important information back to the government when they were at Haroldâs place, but Christopher had been missing in action since then. That was why the police had come to her.Her time with the police was not only to authenticate the information they had given to them, but they also ended up talking about Christopherâs missing status as well.Winnie chose to be selfish about the matter.She lied to the police, saying that she saw Christopher falling off the building, and didnât tell them what Jacinta said.She said she knew nothing and heard nothing. All she knew was that the scene on the rooftop had been chaotic and that many people had died at that time. She was uncertain how Christopher had ended up falling off the building.As the incident happened overseas, the local police could not file an investigation in Avenport, and that was how Winnie removed Xavierâs involvement from the incident.Winnie could not deny that she was selfish. She wanted to keep her loved ones safe. Even if she had a second chance to make things right, she might choose to do the same thing.Still, guilt would fill her insides. She felt sorry for Christopher, and that was why she could not bear to hear Josiah talk badly about Christopher.At that moment, looking at Xavier only made her feel worse, so much so that when Xavier lowered his head to kiss her, tears rolled down her cheeks, and she moved away.Xavier was startled by her action, but he soon came back to his senses.âEven if I had pushed Christopher off the building when I wasnât myself, you still couldnât face me, could you?âWinnie looked at Xavier, her eyes red. âI know you definitely didnât mean it. I know you were a victim too, but youâre right. I donât think I can face you right now, and I donât think I can face myself either.âAfter that, she choked out, âI just came back from the police station after spending almost five days there. Iâm tired; I want to rest. You⦠You should rest too.âShe then stood up, planning to leave.Xavier could understand what Winnie felt at that moment.If he were to put himself in her shoes, no matter how much he loved her, he might not be able to bring himself to face her for a while if she were to lose control of herself and kill Josiah.Although he couldnât control his illness when he pushed Christopher off the building, he still wouldnât forgive a mentally ill person who killed his friend or family easily.Any normal person would hate the crazy culprit. Even if the law were to give the culprit a verdict of not guilty, a normal person would still be cursing death to the culprit until their last breath on Earth.Xavier told himself that, at that very moment, what he should do was let her go and let her rest. If needed, the two of them would stay separated for a period of time.However, he could barely bring himself to do that.He was already reluctant to see Winnie go just as she took two steps away from him.In the end, his emotions won his rationality, and he abruptly hugged Winnie from behind.As he wrapped his arms around her, his chest constricted, refusing to let any fresh air into his lungs.âWinnie,â Xavier breathed. The sorrow in his eyes was obvious to the naked eye. âYouâve never even asked if Iâm fine since you entered the room. Do I no longer hold a place in your heart? The first thing I did when I woke up was to look for you. Grandpa told me that the police took you away, and Josiah told me that I might have accidentally killed Christopher. He told me you saw Christopher falling right next to you. I even thought about turning myself in because I wanted to see you, even if it means that Iâll be at the police station. Winnie, my head hurts. You came in and started talking to Josiah, but you never even talked to me. I didnât have the chance to ask you anything too. How is your arm? Does it still hurt? How did you leave back then? How have you been these days? Have you been eating well? Have you been sleeping well?âWinnieâs tears fell. She turned around and buried her face in Xavierâs chest.âI want to talk to you. I want to pretend that those things never happened. Love is selfish. The love I have for you triumphs over my friendship with Christopher. To me, youâre more important than him. But heâs dead; heâs gone, and I canât get over that yet. I know why you lost control that day. Itâs because of the video Yulissa showed you. I know that some of my words in the video will upset you, but I didnât betray you. He was dying, and I couldnât bear to let him die without getting his peace. If this was why you pushed him, then this whole thing is my fault. I was the one who said those words that made you lose control. I feel horrible, Xavier. Iâve never felt as horrendous as this in my life.
It feels as if Iâve fallen into the abyss. In fact, I also accepted a mission from Wilhelm when we were in Jipsdale. Iâm planning to make a trip back to Yartran in the next few days. I need to give my family an explanation about that missing badge. Take care of yourself when Iâm not around.âWith that, Winnie wiped her tears away and turned to leave the ward.