Chapter 6: Chapter 5

Cody

Beep... Beep...

The phone was dialling, Mason on the other side of the line, and my heart was trying to leap out of my body through my throat.

I wanted to kiss Mason.

I wanted to kiss Mason, my best friend.

I'd honestly tried to do as coach Carta said. Told myself I'd shower, chat with Dylan, Britt and Benjamin about our training, and then forget about that feeling in the pit of my stomach the moment I exited the building.

Funny thing was the funny feeling didn't go away. Sitting outside on a park bench in the fresh air did nothing; I still felt the heat and tingling in my body. And the more I tried to stop thinking about it, the more I thought about it.

And now Mace wanted to talk about our summer holiday. Today. Right now. How was I going to go on a holiday with him? What if it turned out like Manhattan, and we had to share a bed again?  How was I going to plan it with him in the first place? If I saw him, the butterflies might get worse, plus, I'd be going against coach Carta's advice of getting it out of my head. But I couldn't just leave Mace hanging and not answer his messages either.

What should I do? I was half hoping Mace wouldn't pick up. That I wouldn't have to hear his voice, his laugh, and most of all wouldn't have to decide. Was it normal to both intensely hope someone picks up and doesn't pick up at the same time? The phone was still dialling. I'd heard the beep eight times already.

Click.

I nearly dropped the phone in surprise when Mason finally picked up. My hand quivered lightly, and I'm not sure I could blame it on tired muscles from the swimming training. But something was off. Instead of Mason's voice, all I heard was noise: clanging and rattling. It sounded like something or someone falling?

"Uh, hello?" I asked.

"Oh Cody Wody--" I heard what I think was Noel call out sing-song from far away. "Smurf boy lov--!"

Clatter! Bang!

"Ow! Son of a bitch!"

"It's your mom too, idiot-- you're also calling yourself a son of a bitch!"

Mace's voice was mixed in with growling and groaning. Like he and Noel were fighting, actually physically fighting. Were they still at each other's throat from what happened at the bar? Mason had seemed pretty pissed about being teased last night. Noel turned out to be spot on about me with his game, though. I could only hope he didn't realise just how right he was.

"Mace? Noel?" I tried again, unsure if they could hear me.

"Alright, alright geez. Get your panties out of a twist will you? It's not like Cody will ever realise, even if I rub it in his face," Noel's offended voice sounded through the receiver. "I could literally tell him he's--"

"Shut up Noel!"

I heard some more clicking and rustling. Then the other side of the line went silent. The phone was muted I quickly realised. And I waited, confused.

What did Noel think I should be realising? What did he literally want to tell me? He knew something I didn't.

I could feel the colour drain from my face. Noel had been staring at me during his game. Me, not Mace. What if he hadn't been only teasing Mason? Did both he and Mason know something I didn't... before I did?

They gave me little time to mull. A few seconds later the phone un-muted. There was wind in the background, indicating Mason, or at least the phone, was also outside.

"Hey Codes!"

Thankfully, Mason's voice, because I didn't know if I wanted to talk to Noel either. I found myself sitting up straight.

"Hi," I replied awkwardly, suddenly feeling shy. The colour was rapidly returning to my face.

I realised I was automatically smiling at the trees in front of me. Had I always smiled silly like this when Mace talked to me? I couldn't remember. My sudden loss for words was definitely new, though.

Mace didn't seem to notice the sudden awkwardness in my greeting however. He let out a deep sigh. "Sorry about that just now."

"Nah." I waved away his concern. I couldn't wave away my own concerns as easily, however. I had to ask: "You guys still fighting about Noel's game?"

"No, no," Mason hastily replied, denying it much to my relief. "Just Noel being Noel. The usual. He's such a dick. Can't wait until he moves out. So, uh." Mason cleared his throat. "You took your time calling back. I'd expected you about an hour ago - it's gonna be rather tight on time if we still want to look at holiday destinations today."

"Yeah, sorry. Got distracted with coach Carta and the team. You know. T-team... competition stuff. Forgot to text back right away," I said, inwardly cringing at the stammer.

"So," I quickly went on, knowing Mason would catch me on that lie if he asked why I forgot. I was never good at lying. "How, uh, did things go with Zoey when you went back to the bar?"

Geez, I should at least try to sound enthusiastic for Mace's sake. That was so hard to do though, when I kind of didn't want him to say it went well. I should feel bad for being so selfish. I should support him as a friend.

Mason stayed silent for a moment on the other side of the line. "Good, I suppose," he said, "We got to talk some more alone."

"Oh... That's great."

Great is what I said, but great is not what I felt. It was more like the opposite of great, even if I tried to force myself to be happy for him. Is that why I'd thought Zoey somehow didn't fit him before? Had I always wanted Mace for myself, but was I too stupid to notice it? Wouldn't be surprised if that was the case. Simple minded, and lucky to have a talent for swimming.  A mildly smarter Forrest Gump. All things I've heard people say to describe me. I definitely felt stupid right now.

Mason sniffed. "Yeah. While Noel was puking his guts out in the bathroom, things were finally peaceful. He's such an idiot with idiotic games. Can't believe he tried to make us seem gay."

"Yeah. Imagine that," I replied with a small voice, swallowing with some difficulty. "So you really like Zoey huh?"

"Yeah."

"And you're sure?"

"Sure I'm sure!"

After blurting out his answer, Mason breathed in deeply a few times. "I mean, I've actually asked her out. Yes, that's what I did! I wanted to meet up with you in the afternoon because I'm going on a date with Zoey tonight."

"Oh, that's-- that's, congrats."

I'm glad my mouth remembered how to form the polite words to say, because my mind was reeling.

Mace could've mentioned that date with Zoey earlier, but he didn't. Again. Just like he didn't tell me he liked Zoey before he told Noel. I didn't understand. Unless... unless Noel was teasing me, and they both knew I wanted to kiss Mace. My chest felt tight, pressured, as if I was trying to breathe under water.

Mason cleared his throat, breaking the silence and my thought stream. "It's... not such an official date and all though. Zoey and I have been friends for a long time too. I can cut it short so you can also drop by regarding holidays."

"No, no, of course not," I hastily replied. "We can talk holidays later. I mean, it's not like I don't have other things to do as well. There's a pile of math homework with my name on it."

"You sure? I can drop by your place too Codykins. Help you out with finishing that homework," Mace offered. "Bros before hoes, I don't want to leave you hanging."

"Actually, uh no, I don't-- don't think you should right now."

My stammering had gotten worse, and I realised how bad that excuse, if it even counted as an excuse, sounded. Making up lies wasn't my strongest point, and I hadn't thought far ahead enough to realise Mace would offer help, even if it was obvious he would. Mason had been carrying me through mathematics for years. He wouldn't suddenly stop now that I'd realised I might like him. He wouldn't stop if he realised either.

"You don't think I should?" Mason questioned. "Why?"

"Well, coach Carta said you shouldn't--"

"Sparta said I shouldn't go to your place?"

"No he didn't say that. Not exactly that... But he did sort of say that."

Mace snorted in disbelief. "You're not making a lot of sense Codes."

Of course I was only confusing Mason further. He wouldn't understand.

"Now's just not good. Competition thing. I need some time. We'll talk later?"

"Okay?" I could almost see Mason raise an eyebrow. "Right, sure, until tomorrow? Could've said so in the first place Codes."

"Yeah sorry, I'm a bit out of it. Lots of pressure. Have fun on your date. Talk to you tomorrow. Bye," I said almost in telegram style before ending the call.

There was an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach when I put the phone down.

I didn't have to see Mason today. But even talking over the phone was so difficult, and it's not like I could just suddenly not see him at all. He already wanted to see me tomorrow. He'd worry if I kept saying no, and I didn't want to make him worry.

I had also promised coach Carta I'd either solve it or get it out of my head until the regionals. Since getting it out of my head clearly wasn't going to be an option... solving it as soon as possible remained. Maybe I should just tell Mace about my feelings after all. Then he could take them into account, and I didn't have to make him worry. And he would understand why I was staying away.

I buried my head in my hands for a few seconds.

Tonight then. As soon as possible. After his date I'd tell him my thoughts. No matter how hard it was going to be.