I wait for Daisy to leave the damn classroom, wondering whatâs taking her so long. Sheâs always the first person to shoot out of her desk, running off at high speed so she wonât be late.
Me? I take my time and am late for pretty much every class. Teachers donât even mark me tardy because whatâs the point? I wonât really get in trouble.
For the most part.
This afternoon though, Iâm eager to get into statistics class. I want to see if Daisy responded to my note. What did she think of my scene choice? I thought it was pretty tame, but there was something undeniably hot about the way the author described the kiss. Slow and searching and shit.
Wouldnât mind kissing Daisy like that. Still worried she might slap me if I try though.
Did she notice what I did in the office? I tried my best to recreate that scene from the book where the couple touched pinkies. I mean, thatâs not even close to sexual, but itâs a tension thing so I see the appeal.
Thatâs why I shifted close to her while she remained on the phone for so long. Pressing myself against her. Absorbing her. Did she realize it? She seemed extra focused on those phone calls so maybe not. Sheâs not sexually experienced at all and Iâm assuming she doesnât think I like her because of that.
I shouldnât like her like that.
Sheâs all I can think about.
Finally, she exits the classroom, turning her head left, then right, causing me to duck, tucking myself on the other side of the line of lockers Iâm standing by so she doesnât see me. I wait a few seconds, my heart pounding before I finally peer around the lockers once more.
The coast is clear.
I sneak into the classroom just as the bell rings, settling into my desk. Mrs. Nelson watches me, her lips curved when our gazes meet.
âLook at you showing up on time. Iâm impressed.â
I flash her a smile. Iâve always liked Nelson. She doesnât give me too much shit. âI aim to please.â
âYouâre also a flirt.â She grabs an eraser and taps it loudly against the white board. âOkay, class! Time to get your homework assignments out and pass them to the front.â
Iâve already got my assignment out, and since Iâm sitting in the first seat of the rowâchanneling my inner Daisy Albright before I even realized it, go figureâI wait to collect everyone elseâs, ignoring the way the girl who sits behind me smiles. Like sheâs interested.
No thanks.
Once Nelson has started her lecture, I reach for Daisyâs book, curious to see what she said. What she wrote. The book is still there and I take that as a good sign. Slowly, I pull it out, resting it in my lap and flipping it open to the place I notated.
I smile when I see she drew little pink hearts all around my favorite part of the section I highlighted.
Slow. Searching. Tasting. Learning.
Glancing up, I make sure no one is paying attention to me before I read what she wrote on the Post-it.
I like that part too. It made me shiver.
There are lots of ways I could make this girl shiver.
I left you a pen so you can highlight whatever you want. A favorite line. A meaningful one. I highlighted what I liked in chapter fifteen in pink.
Without hesitation, I flip to chapter fifteen in search of what she liked, finding it quickly.
With sweaty palms I exit the dressing room, clad in the red dress he chose for me. He stands the moment he sees me, his eyes darkening I can tell.
He likes the dress.
He likes it on me.
âGet it,â he says.
âButââ
âGet it,â he repeats.
I smile and he smiles in return. He wants me.
I want him too.
So much.
Ignoring the book, I lift my head and stare off into space, thinking. Daisy opened up to me earlier, in the office. Explaining why sheâs so closed off. Why she wants to protect her heart. My mommy issues comment was right on the mark, but that doesnât make it okay that I said it.
I shouldâve never said those words to her but Iâm a heartless dick who speaks before he thinks, like I canât help myself.
Most of the time, I canât. My impulse control is nonexistent, according to my parents.
This passage I just read tells me she wants to be beautiful for someone else. She wants to be noticed. The earlier passage tells me she wants to be kissed.
Iâm willing to do both for herâtell her sheâs beautiful and kiss her. But she acts so damn scared most of the time, Iâm worried sheâll bail the moment I try.
Nelson calls my name and I slide my attention to her, my brows up in question.
âDo you understand this segment?â
Nodding, I say, âAbsolutely.â
Her smile is pleased and she doesnât challenge me further. âGood. Letâs continue.â
I thumb through the book when I can, trying not to look suspicious, and I finally find a scene I like. I grab the pen Daisy left me and uncap it, then carefully underline the sentences I like the best.
I am no artist so I donât bother drawing anything on the page. Sheâs lucky sheâs getting the highlighter. Thatâs about as far as Iâll take it.
And I canât believe Iâm taking it this far. I would never do this kind of sappy shit for a girl. Not a single one of them means anything to me enough to want to do this. Iâm putting in a lot of effort when in the past, Iâve put in zero.
They all just come running. Surrounding me. Clamoring for me. Wanting me.
Look at Cadence. I could go to her right now and tell her to spread her legs and she would. Sheâs that into me. That eager to please me.
But it doesnât feel real. It doesnât feel right. Cadence and the rest of them donât give a shit about me. Not really. They care about what I can do for them, being seen with me. My last name and the money and prestige that comes with it. To spend time with a Lancaster makes people feel special and I guess I get it.
I think about Daisy, and how she doesnât act that way around me at all. My name definitely doesnât impress her, and Iâm pretty sure she hated me on sight. And while I sound like a complete douche even in my own head, I canât help but find that refreshing.
Itâs not that sheâs one of those ânot like other girlsâ girls either. Itâs just that she has zero tolerance for me. Sheâs not interested. Iâm not even on her radar.
She was aware of me, of course, because of our academic situation. And while Iâve noticed her and always thought she was moderately prettyâfine, sheâs beautifulâI didnât think of her like that. Sheâs a good girl.
And Iâve never bothered with good girls before.
The more I think about her, the more I want to get to know her. I want to find out what she likes, what she doesnât like. Her favorite food. Her favorite color. What does she want to do once high school is over. Sheâs a total overachiever so Iâd guess college is on the agenda.
Would she think less of me if I told her that doesnât interest me? Would I sound like a spoiled rich prick if I admitted I just want to travel around for the next few years and see the world?
I sound like a rich prick in my own head so Iâm sure the answer is yes to that last question.
I grab a fresh Post-it and slap it on the page I just highlighted, then grab my pencil and write a little note for Daisy. Wondering if sheâs figured out who sheâs communicating with yet.
Probably not. Will she be pissed when she finds out itâs me?
Probably.
Iâm willing to take the risk.
Once school is over and Iâm exiting the building, I spot my sister walking just ahead of me. I call her name and she glances over her shoulder, stopping to wait for me as I approach.
âLowering your standards to be seen with me, hmm?â Edie tilts her head, her assessing gaze landing on my face.
I scowl. âCome on, Edie. Lowering my standards? Give me a break. Youâre the one whoâs never around.â
âIâm hanging out with my friends and youâre hanging out with yours. Though Iâve noticed youâve been ignoring them more and more lately.â
Sheâs right.
âCadence texted me last night,â Edie adds.
Damn, why canât she leave thisâmeâalone? âWhat the hell did she want?â
âTips on how to get back into your bed.â Edie laughs when I sputter. âShe didnât say those exact words, but she implied it. Sheâs so sad, Arch.â
âShe can remain sad. Iâm not interested in her.â If Edie really fell for Cadenceâs lies, then sheâs more gullible than I thought she was.
âWho are you interested in?â
âNo one,â I lie. âWhat about you?â
âNot a single student on this campus could interest me,â Edie says, her voice downright smug. âTheyâre all so immature. Even guys in your class. Especially guys in your class.â
âRight and all of those assholes in your class are far superior,â I say sarcastically.
âI never said that. They definitely arenât.â
We give each other shit the entire walk back to the building where our rooms are. Sheâs right down the hall from me and itâs kind of nice, knowing sheâs there with me. I canât imagine being on this campus alone, the only Lancaster in this old, creepy building. Once I graduate, Edie will be the only Lancaster left standing on campus.
Wait. Our little brothers will be freshmen next year so she wonât be a complete loner. Iâll be the one whoâs out and the rest of my siblings will be here.
My steps slow when we pass by the Albrightâs garden. Row after row of vegetables, mostly tomatoes. And the rose bushes. Funny how they donât grow daisies.
I take it all in, wishing she was there so I could go to her and talk to her, just so I could hear her voice, but thereâs no one out there.
Just that damn cat I scared off last night. Sniffing around the vegetables right before it sinks its teeth into a fat tomato, makes a hissing noise and then runs off.
âYou know back in the day the Italians wouldnât eat tomatoes because they tasted too acidic. They thought they were poisonous,â Edie says, dropping a little factoid like she often does.
âNo shit?â
âYeah. I donât think that cat liked the taste.â
âThat cat is kind of a dumbass.â
âYou know this cat?â Edie sounds amused.
âWeâve had run-ins before, yeah.â
âOh really?â
I change the subject, not about to mention who else I ran into.
Thereâs something about Daisy that I want to keep all to myself. Not that Iâm ashamed of her or anything. More like I want to protect her. No one else needs to know about us. Our interactions. Nothing can come of this. Itâs more than likely that nothing at all will come of it and thatâll be that.
But right now, while I can cling to these moments with her, Iâm going to. I sound like a sappy asshole even in my own head, but I canât help it. This girlâ¦
Feels special.
I donât want to fuck it up.